thoughtcatalog--2020-12-15--The Happiest Humans Don’t Give A Damn About What You Think

The happiest humans understand they aren ’ t living to please the people around them .
They realize everyone has a different definition of a successful life , so what will bring someone else joy might not bring them any satisfaction at all .
They aren ’ t going to force themselves into a career or relationship that makes them uncomfortable , simply because it looks good on social media .
They aren ’ t going to strive to create an existence that seems impressive on paper instead of living one that actually feels good for them .
The happiest @ @ @ @ @ @ @ trends .
They don ’ t allow society to convince them they need to hit certain milestones in order to feel fulfilled .
Instead of assuming the same things that make their friends happy will make them happy , they take the time to look deep inside themselves .
They ask themselves intimate questions to discover what they secretly want .
These people don ’ t want to mindlessly do what is expected of them without ever stopping to think about whether it ’ s the right path for them .
They want @ @ @ @ @ @ @ best decisions for themselves .
The happiest humans aren ’ t under the impression that popularity will solve all their problems .
They understand validation will only make them feel better for a short while .
The high is only temporary .
That ’ s why they place more emphasis on impressing themselves , respecting themselves , and loving themselves than looking good for others .
They know that , even though they might feel the urge to be accepted by others , the opinion that matters most of all is their own @ @ @ @ @ @ @ give a damn what you think .
They aren ’ t going to make decisions based on what would make their parents proud or their peers jealous .
Although they hope to get along with everyone and be accepted overall , they aren ’ t going to spend too much time worrying about what others will think of their individual decisions .
They understand it isn ’ t selfish to follow their heart .
It ’ s necessary to treat themselves as a priority if they ’ re going to find true , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ there are going to be people who don ’ t understand them .
There are going to be people who look down on them .
There are going to be people who believe they know better .
However , the happiest humans are confident enough to know their worst critics are wrong .
They are perfectly capable of making their own decisions , and despite what others believe , they are doing pretty damn well for themselves .
They are proud of how far they ’ ve come .
The happiest humans aren @ @ @ @ @ @ @ t immune to mean comments and nasty looks .
There are still going to be moments when they feel like everyone is judging them and they wish they would just fit in .
However , they try hard to snap themselves out of that mindset .
They constantly remind themselves that it doesn ’ t matter what the rest of the world thinks of them .
It only matters whether they ’ re happy , and whether they ’ re being the best human they can be .

The happiest humans understand they aren’t living to please the people around them. They realize everyone has a different definition of a successful life, so what will bring someone else joy might not bring them any satisfaction at all. They aren’t going to force themselves into a career or relationship that makes them uncomfortable, simply because it looks good on social media. They aren’t going to strive to create an existence that seems impressive on paper instead of living one that actually feels good for them.
The happiest humans follow their guts, not the trends. They don’t allow society to convince them they need to hit certain milestones in order to feel fulfilled. Instead of assuming the same things that make their friends happy will make them happy, they take the time to look deep inside themselves. They ask themselves intimate questions to discover what they secretly want. These people don’t want to mindlessly do what is expected of them without ever stopping to think about whether it’s the right path for them. They want to know they’re making the best decisions for themselves.
The happiest humans aren’t under the impression that popularity will solve all their problems. They understand validation will only make them feel better for a short while. The high is only temporary. That’s why they place more emphasis on impressing themselves, respecting themselves, and loving themselves than looking good for others. They know that, even though they might feel the urge to be accepted by others, the opinion that matters most of all is their own.
The happiest humans don’t give a damn what you think. They aren’t going to make decisions based on what would make their parents proud or their peers jealous. Although they hope to get along with everyone and be accepted overall, they aren’t going to spend too much time worrying about what others will think of their individual decisions. They understand it isn’t selfish to follow their heart. It’s necessary to treat themselves as a priority if they’re going to find true, unfiltered happiness.
The happiest humans understand there are going to be people who don’t understand them. There are going to be people who look down on them. There are going to be people who believe they know better. However, the happiest humans are confident enough to know their worst critics are wrong. They are perfectly capable of making their own decisions, and despite what others believe, they are doing pretty damn well for themselves. They are proud of how far they’ve come.
The happiest humans aren’t heartless. They aren’t immune to mean comments and nasty looks. There are still going to be moments when they feel like everyone is judging them and they wish they would just fit in. However, they try hard to snap themselves out of that mindset. They constantly remind themselves that it doesn’t matter what the rest of the world thinks of them. It only matters whether they’re happy, and whether they’re being the best human they can be.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-15--6 Uncomfortable Truths About Starting Over In Your Twenties

1 .
You might wish you would ’ ve settled — but will eventually be thankful that wasn ’ t the case .
There might be moments when you regret leaving a partner or quitting a job and starting completely from scratch .
There might be moments when you miss the stability you used to have and wish you could take your past decisions back .
However , you have to remember you walked away for a reason .
You weren ’ t happy — and you deserve happiness .
It might take some more struggles to get there , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ your destination .
In the end , you ’ re going to be relieved you refused to settle when given the chance .
2 .
It ’ s natural to feel like you ’ re falling behind — but there isn ’ t a set timeline you ’ re supposed to follow .
There isn ’ t a milestone age when you ’ re supposed to have a home and a ring and a positive pregnancy stick .
You might have those things , then lose those things , then gain those things @ @ @ @ @ @ @ want those things in the first place .
You need to remember that , even though you might feel like everyone is pressuring you to live a certain type of life , your existence is not a competition .
You aren ’ t racing to see who can cross milestones off a checklist first .
You ’ re simply doing your best to find happiness in a crazy world .
3 .
The embarrassment isn ’ t going to kill you .
You might be embarrassed about getting divorced or losing your dream @ @ @ @ @ @ @ home — but shitty things happen .
There might be people who judge you or pity you over your ‘ setbacks ’ , but frankly , those people aren ’ t worth your time .
Once you spot them , you can begin to weed them out of your life .
You can keep the good people around instead , the people who love and support you no matter how successful you look from afar .
4 .
You ’ re going to feel lost — and that ’ s okay .
You @ @ @ @ @ @ @ should be easier now that you ’ re older and wiser , but those things are never going to be easy .
There are always going to be hurdles .
You ’ re always going to feel a little unsure and off-balance .
Remember , it ’ s okay if you have absolutely no idea what you ’ re doing , even though you ’ re older now .
5 .
Your struggles might be visible , but you aren ’ t the only one struggling .
When you go through a major @ @ @ @ @ @ @ hear the news , which can feel daunting .
However , just because you ’ re going publicly going through a change doesn ’ t mean you ’ re the only one suffering .
The people around you are dealing with problems of their own .
They aren ’ t perfect , either .
They ’ re simply dealing with their issues quietly .
6 .
You should embrace changes instead of running from them .
It ’ s never too late to start over .
Instead of telling yourself that you should @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , you should remind yourself that you can make the change now so you don ’ t have the same regret in a few more years .
It ’ s better late than never .

1. You might wish you would’ve settled — but will eventually be thankful that wasn’t the case. There might be moments when you regret leaving a partner or quitting a job and starting completely from scratch. There might be moments when you miss the stability you used to have and wish you could take your past decisions back. However, you have to remember you walked away for a reason. You weren’t happy — and you deserve happiness. It might take some more struggles to get there, but you’re going to reach your destination. In the end, you’re going to be relieved you refused to settle when given the chance.
2. It’s natural to feel like you’re falling behind — but there isn’t a set timeline you’re supposed to follow. There isn’t a milestone age when you’re supposed to have a home and a ring and a positive pregnancy stick. You might have those things, then lose those things, then gain those things again. Or you might not even want those things in the first place. You need to remember that, even though you might feel like everyone is pressuring you to live a certain type of life, your existence is not a competition. You aren’t racing to see who can cross milestones off a checklist first. You’re simply doing your best to find happiness in a crazy world.
3. The embarrassment isn’t going to kill you. You might be embarrassed about getting divorced or losing your dream job or moving out of your beautiful home — but shitty things happen. There might be people who judge you or pity you over your ‘setbacks’, but frankly, those people aren’t worth your time. Once you spot them, you can begin to weed them out of your life. You can keep the good people around instead, the people who love and support you no matter how successful you look from afar.
4. You’re going to feel lost — and that’s okay. You might feel like dating or job hunting should be easier now that you’re older and wiser, but those things are never going to be easy. There are always going to be hurdles. You’re always going to feel a little unsure and off-balance. Remember, it’s okay if you have absolutely no idea what you’re doing, even though you’re older now.
5. Your struggles might be visible, but you aren’t the only one struggling. When you go through a major life change, everyone is going to hear the news, which can feel daunting. However, just because you’re going publicly going through a change doesn’t mean you’re the only one suffering. The people around you are dealing with problems of their own. They aren’t perfect, either. They’re simply dealing with their issues quietly.
6. You should embrace changes instead of running from them. It’s never too late to start over. Instead of telling yourself that you should’ve made certain changes years ago, you should remind yourself that you can make the change now so you don’t have the same regret in a few more years. It’s better late than never.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-15--Stop Telling Yourself You Should’ve Known Better Than To Date Your Ex

Stop telling yourself you should ’ ve known better than to date your ex .
Stop acting like it ’ s your own fault you ended up with your heart broken because you missed all the red flags .
Sometimes , there aren ’ t any red flags .
Sometimes , those warning signs are so microscopic that there ’ s no way you possibly could ’ ve picked up on them in the moment .
Sure , looking back , it ’ s easy to pinpoint all of the different times when you should ’ ve known better .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ stepping stones leading from the beginning of your relationship to the end .
But that doesn ’ t mean that you could ’ ve seen the truth earlier .
It doesn ’ t mean that you ’ re a fool for staying with this person for such a long time .
You didn ’ t have the same information back than that you have now .
Things have changed , so your perspective has changed .
You shouldn ’ t blame yourself for taking a chance on someone who gave you butterflies .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ idiot for falling for them — because at the time , there was no reason to doubt them .
They checked all your boxes .
They made sense with you , so of course you ended up together .
Now , dating them might feel like a mistake , but back then , turning them down would ’ ve felt like a mistake .
You can ’ t blame your past self for failing to realize things that are clear to you now .
Your past self is a completely different person with @ @ @ @ @ @ @ if they had your current knowledge , you might ’ ve made the same decisions .
Really , you have no idea what would ’ ve happened .
There ’ s no sense in worrying about the what ifs .
It doesn ’ t matter what might ’ ve happened if you realized the truth earlier or never dated in the first place .
You can ’ t turn back time .
You can ’ t change the fact that you developed a deep bond with this person .
You can ’ t @ @ @ @ @ @ @ though you might be filled with regrets right now , you need to stop telling yourself you should ’ ve known better than to date your ex .
You need to stop blaming yourself for someone else treating you poorly .
You need to stop beating yourself up about what you did and did not do .
You can ’ t control the actions of your past self , but you can make smart , beautiful choices moving forward .
You need to keep looking ahead .
You need to focus on your @ @ @ @ @ @ @ a hard time moving on from the fact you stayed with someone so wrong for you , remember , you didn ’ t have all the details back then .
You didn ’ t know what kind of pain they were capable of putting you through .
You didn ’ t realize that they would steal your heart and smash it to pieces .
Be gentle on yourself because your mistakes aren ’ t a sign of stupidity .
You should be proud of yourself for taking a chance on love — and @ @ @ @ @ @ @ getting out of the situation once you realized love wasn ’ t supposed to feel like this at all .

Stop telling yourself you should’ve known better than to date your ex. Stop acting like it’s your own fault you ended up with your heart broken because you missed all the red flags.
Sometimes, there aren’t any red flags. Sometimes, those warning signs are so microscopic that there’s no way you possibly could’ve picked up on them in the moment.
Sure, looking back, it’s easy to pinpoint all of the different times when you should’ve known better. Now, you can clearly see the stepping stones leading from the beginning of your relationship to the end.
But that doesn’t mean that you could’ve seen the truth earlier. It doesn’t mean that you’re a fool for staying with this person for such a long time. You didn’t have the same information back than that you have now. Things have changed, so your perspective has changed.
You shouldn’t blame yourself for taking a chance on someone who gave you butterflies. You shouldn’t feel like an idiot for falling for them — because at the time, there was no reason to doubt them. They checked all your boxes. They made sense with you, so of course you ended up together.
Now, dating them might feel like a mistake, but back then, turning them down would’ve felt like a mistake.
You can’t blame your past self for failing to realize things that are clear to you now. Your past self is a completely different person with a different set of experiences. Even if they had your current knowledge, you might’ve made the same decisions. Really, you have no idea what would’ve happened.
There’s no sense in worrying about the what ifs. It doesn’t matter what might’ve happened if you realized the truth earlier or never dated in the first place. You can’t turn back time. You can’t change the fact that you developed a deep bond with this person. You can’t erase years of your history.
Even though you might be filled with regrets right now, you need to stop telling yourself you should’ve known better than to date your ex. You need to stop blaming yourself for someone else treating you poorly. You need to stop beating yourself up about what you did and did not do.
You can’t control the actions of your past self, but you can make smart, beautiful choices moving forward. You need to keep looking ahead. You need to focus on your future instead.
Although you might have a hard time moving on from the fact you stayed with someone so wrong for you, remember, you didn’t have all the details back then. You didn’t know what kind of pain they were capable of putting you through. You didn’t realize that they would steal your heart and smash it to pieces.
Be gentle on yourself because your mistakes aren’t a sign of stupidity. You should be proud of yourself for taking a chance on love — and you should be proud of yourself for getting out of the situation once you realized love wasn’t supposed to feel like this at all.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-15--30 Regrets Brides And Grooms Have About Their Wedding Day

1 .
Thinking it was so important to get all of my family there .
In retrospect , those that had to be convinced and accommodated shouldn ’ t have been there .
2 .
Posing for pictures .
Ended up putting so much energy into getting perfect pics we didn ’ t spend time in the moment .
Just ask your photographer to do candid shots only and focus on enjoying the day .
Your pics will be great whether you try hard to have perfect photos or not and you won ’ t look at the album nearly @ @ @ @ @ @ @ 3 .
Doing the garter throw .
It ’ s just weird .
4 .
Picking the longest song ever for a first dance .
5 .
A reception line .
I got talked into it .
I didn ’ t want to do it , but felt pressured .
All I did for 3/4 of my reception was stand and say hello to people it was miserable and took a lot of the fun out of the day .
7 .
I regret not hiring a DJ .
It ’ s not @ @ @ @ @ @ @ flow of the wedding .
Flower toss , first dance , money dance , whatever you want .
We cut corners where we could and that was one I regret .
8 .
Not wearing sunscreen .
As it turns out the rules don ’ t change because it ’ s a special day .
9 .
Not renting my wedding dress .
What a huge waste of mo eye to look great for two hours .
Besides , I had a boy so couldn ’ t even pass it down .
10 @ @ @ @ @ @ @ dancing so much .
We danced so much , we forgot to go around to individually thank everyone for coming .
They all came to us on the dance floor to say hello .
10/10 still dancing .
11 .
Having a cake because you “ have to have a cake.
” Our dinner was fairly late and came with dessert , and then an hour later there was cake that literally everyone was too full to eat .
12 .
I would say not giving more money for booze upfront because we @ @ @ @ @ @ @ $ 2,000 to the bar tab during the reception , which I ’ m sure cut into their fun a bit .
13 .
I thought I wouldn ’ t want it , but now I wish I had hired a videographer .
My pictures are amazing , but I would have liked to be able to watch it .
14 .
Agreeing to let my mother-in-law make my cake .
We had a naked cake because she didn ’ t finish it .
I ’ m still pissed three years later .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ school sweethearts and had been together forever .
We ended up waiting until our oldest son was 9 before finally making it official .
Should have gotten it out of the way ages ago .
16 .
We did a backyard wedding and the property had turkeys that were squawking through our whole ceremony .
BE AWARE OF TURKEYS !
17 .
I regret making my former best friend my bridesmaid .
We were growing in different directions , I knew she hated weddings but my dumb ass thought I could bring her @ @ @ @ @ @ @ I felt terrible when she predictably did not give a shit about anything .
I felt overlooked and unimportant .
I should ’ ve just let the friendship run its course instead of dragging us through this final death rattle of a relationship I was grieving in real time .
I felt humiliated because the person I loved so much did not give a fuck .
19 .
Getting married publicly and changing my name .
I only wanted a courthouse wedding and desperately wanted to keep my name .
My ex would @ @ @ @ @ @ @ met .
I should have known then .
20 .
I didn ’ t get to eat the hors d ’ oeuvres .
I was so excited about them , especially the tiny beef wellingtons .
Was so busy taking pictures and then getting to the main course I forgot to get any .
I also forgot to get drunk !
I had maybe one or two drinks !
It was such a busy day .
I kinda wish I could have gone as a guest .
21 .
Not having some help @ @ @ @ @ @ @ up the loose ends and tidy up .
22 .
Getting shitfaced at the rehearsal dinner .
I didn ’ t want to puke the whole day of my actual wedding .
23 .
Getting married in a church .
It was OK and didn ’ t ruin our day at all , both of our parents are Catholic , and it just made everything easier to make our parents happy , but it got weird when they asked us to promise to have children and we were like no .
We had @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , for our parents .
24 .
I absolutely adored my wedding .
If I would change one thing though , it would have been to hire a hair and makeup artist .
My MIL did my hair and it was fine and I did my own makeup and it was fine , but I wish I had just let myself spend that little bit extra on myself looking back .
25 .
Stuffing cake in my wife ’ s face .
No exaggeration , I regret it to this day .
One @ @ @ @ @ @ @ is to protect your spouse , with words , with your actions .
Protect in this case has the meaning of upholding their dignity , their honor , etc .
shoving cake in their face is not doing any of that and it ’ s very very public .
Don ’ t do it .
Plus it messed with her make-up , I really really wish I hadn ’ t .
26 .
I would move speeches to before dinner is served , people are quicker when they ’ re hungry and not @ @ @ @ @ @ @ pubes .
A Tight suit , hot weather , and an itchy scrotum are a recipe for disaster !
29 .
Having one .
The marriage was enough for us but we were pressured into having a wedding .
It was fine , I guess , but I wish we would have just gone on a better , longer honeymoon .
30 .
Seems like most people ’ s regret can be drilled down into doing what their parents wanted them to do .

Some couples from Ask Reddit are sharing regrets about their wedding day.
1. Thinking it was so important to get all of my family there. In retrospect, those that had to be convinced and accommodated shouldn’t have been there.
2. Posing for pictures. Ended up putting so much energy into getting perfect pics we didn’t spend time in the moment. Just ask your photographer to do candid shots only and focus on enjoying the day. Your pics will be great whether you try hard to have perfect photos or not and you won’t look at the album nearly as often as you might think.
3. Doing the garter throw. It’s just weird.
4. Picking the longest song ever for a first dance.
5. A reception line. I got talked into it. I didn’t want to do it, but felt pressured. All I did for 3/4 of my reception was stand and say hello to people it was miserable and took a lot of the fun out of the day.
6. Getting a friend to video, it’s crap.
7. I regret not hiring a DJ. It’s not only music, they help with the flow of the wedding. Flower toss, first dance, money dance, whatever you want. We cut corners where we could and that was one I regret.
8. Not wearing sunscreen. As it turns out the rules don’t change because it’s a special day.
9. Not renting my wedding dress. What a huge waste of mo eye to look great for two hours. Besides, I had a boy so couldn’t even pass it down.
10. In all honesty, I regret dancing so much. We danced so much, we forgot to go around to individually thank everyone for coming. They all came to us on the dance floor to say hello. 10/10 still dancing.
11. Having a cake because you “have to have a cake.” Our dinner was fairly late and came with dessert, and then an hour later there was cake that literally everyone was too full to eat.
12. I would say not giving more money for booze upfront because we ran out and my in-laws quietly added $2,000 to the bar tab during the reception, which I’m sure cut into their fun a bit.
13. I thought I wouldn’t want it, but now I wish I had hired a videographer. My pictures are amazing, but I would have liked to be able to watch it.
14. Agreeing to let my mother-in-law make my cake. We had a naked cake because she didn’t finish it. I’m still pissed three years later.
15. Waiting. We were high school sweethearts and had been together forever. We ended up waiting until our oldest son was 9 before finally making it official. Should have gotten it out of the way ages ago.
16. We did a backyard wedding and the property had turkeys that were squawking through our whole ceremony. BE AWARE OF TURKEYS!
17. I regret making my former best friend my bridesmaid.
We were growing in different directions, I knew she hated weddings but my dumb ass thought I could bring her closer.
It was a disaster and I felt terrible when she predictably did not give a shit about anything. I felt overlooked and unimportant.
I should’ve just let the friendship run its course instead of dragging us through this final death rattle of a relationship I was grieving in real time. I felt humiliated because the person I loved so much did not give a fuck.
Learn from my mistake.
18. Wearing heels.
19. Getting married publicly and changing my name. I only wanted a courthouse wedding and desperately wanted to keep my name. My ex would only marry me if those conditions were met. I should have known then.
20. I didn’t get to eat the hors d’oeuvres. I was so excited about them, especially the tiny beef wellingtons. Was so busy taking pictures and then getting to the main course I forgot to get any. I also forgot to get drunk! I had maybe one or two drinks! It was such a busy day. I kinda wish I could have gone as a guest.
21. Not having some help for after the party to help tie up the loose ends and tidy up.
22. Getting shitfaced at the rehearsal dinner. I didn’t want to puke the whole day of my actual wedding.
23. Getting married in a church. It was OK and didn’t ruin our day at all, both of our parents are Catholic, and it just made everything easier to make our parents happy, but it got weird when they asked us to promise to have children and we were like no. We had a ceremony that meant nothing to us, for our parents.
24. I absolutely adored my wedding. If I would change one thing though, it would have been to hire a hair and makeup artist. My MIL did my hair and it was fine and I did my own makeup and it was fine, but I wish I had just let myself spend that little bit extra on myself looking back.
25. Stuffing cake in my wife’s face. No exaggeration, I regret it to this day.
One of the traits of a successful marriage is to protect your spouse, with words, with your actions. Protect in this case has the meaning of upholding their dignity, their honor, etc. shoving cake in their face is not doing any of that and it’s very very public.
Don’t do it. Plus it messed with her make-up, I really really wish I hadn’t.
26. I would move speeches to before dinner is served, people are quicker when they’re hungry and not drunk yet.
27. Forgetting to put deodorant on.
28. Shaving my pubes. A Tight suit, hot weather, and an itchy scrotum are a recipe for disaster!
29. Having one. The marriage was enough for us but we were pressured into having a wedding. It was fine, I guess, but I wish we would have just gone on a better, longer honeymoon.
30. Seems like most people’s regret can be drilled down into doing what their parents wanted them to do.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-15--Why Each Zodiac Has Trouble Unwinding

Why Each Zodiac Has Trouble Unwinding

You put too much pressure on yourself and always feel like you need to be working and achieving something new .
You ’ re an overthinker .
You have trouble turning your brain off and forgetting about your responsibilities , even for a little while .
You work long hours and when you get home , there are countless chores to do .
You feel like relaxing isn ’ t even an option .
Relaxing feels selfish to you .
You would rather be doing something nice for someone else than for yourself because you never treat yourself like a @ @ @ @ @ @ @ to relaxing .
There ’ s always one more thing you want to finish before you unwind — but as soon as you finish it , you come up with something else to do .
Relaxing makes you feel lazy .
It makes you feel like you ’ re missing out on valuable time .
You feel like relaxing should only happen about once per year .
You take one big break instead of several small ones and end up burning out .
A part of you feels like you don ’ t @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ’ t done enough to earn it .
You don ’ t even know how to unwind anymore .
You ’ re not sure what you ’ re supposed to be doing in order to feel relaxed because not many things make you happy .
You ’ re always stressed about something .
Once a problem enters your mind , you can ’ t force yourself to forget about it .
You consider your work fun so you think you don ’ t have to relax , when really , you do .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ but no one pushes you to unwind .
And you do what you ’ re told .

Aries
You put too much pressure on yourself and always feel like you need to be working and achieving something new.
You’re an overthinker. You have trouble turning your brain off and forgetting about your responsibilities, even for a little while.
Gemini
You work long hours and when you get home, there are countless chores to do. You feel like relaxing isn’t even an option.
Cancer
Relaxing feels selfish to you. You would rather be doing something nice for someone else than for yourself because you never treat yourself like a priority.
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Leo
You procrastinate when it comes to relaxing. There’s always one more thing you want to finish before you unwind — but as soon as you finish it, you come up with something else to do.
Virgo
Relaxing makes you feel lazy. It makes you feel like you’re missing out on valuable time.
Libra
You feel like relaxing should only happen about once per year. You take one big break instead of several small ones and end up burning out.
A part of you feels like you don’t deserve to relax, like you haven’t done enough to earn it.
Sagittarius
You don’t even know how to unwind anymore. You’re not sure what you’re supposed to be doing in order to feel relaxed because not many things make you happy.
Capricorn
You’re always stressed about something. Once a problem enters your mind, you can’t force yourself to forget about it.
You consider your work fun so you think you don’t have to relax, when really, you do.
Pisces
Everyone pushes you to work hard — but no one pushes you to unwind. And you do what you’re told.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-16--How Each Zodiac Sign Panics When Flirting

You send risky texts to the person you like and then toss your phone across the room because you ’ re too scared to read their reply .
You stare at your crush from across the room — but you look away as soon as they make eye contact and never actually approach them .
You write out flirtatious messages to your crush — and then overthink what you ’ re doing and delete them without actually sending .
You post pictures to impress your crush , then immediately regret it and delete them .
You check the mirror over @ @ @ @ @ @ @ you look from their point of view .
You actually flirt pretty well in person — but then you run the conversation through your head a million times after they walk away and freak out .
You fidget with your earrings , your bracelets , your necklaces , everything because you can ’ t keep still .
You try to come up with jokes and talking points ahead of time , but then forget everything as soon as you see them .
You get nervous about saying anything too forward and coming across @ @ @ @ @ @ @ barely flirting at all .
You stare at your crush ’ s posts and pictures for way longer than you should , trying to come up with something clever to say to them .
You sputter out the first thing that pops into your head without thinking through what you ’ re actually saying .
You send your friends screenshots so they can help you figure out what to say to this person .

Aries
You send risky texts to the person you like and then toss your phone across the room because you’re too scared to read their reply.
You stare at your crush from across the room — but you look away as soon as they make eye contact and never actually approach them.
Gemini
You write out flirtatious messages to your crush — and then overthink what you’re doing and delete them without actually sending.
Cancer
You post pictures to impress your crush, then immediately regret it and delete them.
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Leo
You check the mirror over and over again, worried about how you look from their point of view.
Virgo
You actually flirt pretty well in person — but then you run the conversation through your head a million times after they walk away and freak out.
Libra
You fidget with your earrings, your bracelets, your necklaces, everything because you can’t keep still.
You try to come up with jokes and talking points ahead of time, but then forget everything as soon as you see them.
Sagittarius
You get nervous about saying anything too forward and coming across as creepy, and you end up barely flirting at all.
Capricorn
You stare at your crush’s posts and pictures for way longer than you should, trying to come up with something clever to say to them.
Aquarius
You sputter out the first thing that pops into your head without thinking through what you’re actually saying.
You send your friends screenshots so they can help you figure out what to say to this person.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-16--5 Things To Remember If Your Girlfriend’s Love Language Is Quality Time

1 .
It doesn ’ t matter what you ’ re doing — but it matters that you ’ re present .
She isn ’ t going to care whether you ’ re taking her out on some expensive , fancy excursion or whether you ’ re setting up a fun activity in the middle of your living room .
Simply spending time with you is going to be enough .
However , you need to be fully present .
If you keep checking your texts or scrolling through social media , then she ’ s going to feel like @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
When she ’ s with you , she wants your full attention on her .
She wants to know you ’ re happy to be there .
She doesn ’ t want to feel like you have better things to do .
2 .
You can always make more time .
You might feel like you ’ re too swamped with work to dedicate enough time to your relationship — but you don ’ t need to spend whole weekends with her in order to make her happy .
If you spend @ @ @ @ @ @ @ with her or take her out for a quick dinner after your shift , she ’ s going to be excited .
All she wants is to spend time with you .
If you are unable to prioritize her , even a little bit , then she ’ s going to start questioning the relationship .
She needs to know she ’ s an important piece of your world and words aren ’ t enough .
She needs your actions to back up your claims .
3 .
Make sure you pay close @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
Even if you ’ re not staring at your phone , that doesn ’ t mean you ’ re actively listening to her .
She doesn ’ t want you to nod along to her stories , pretending to listen .
She doesn ’ t want your mind to wander to other things you need to get done later while she ’ s in the middle of speaking .
She wants to have deep , insightful conversations with you .
She wants to know that you ’ re really connecting .
Physically @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ’ t enough .
You need to be there emotionally as well .
4 .
Even mundane things can give you a chance to connect .
You might feel like you don ’ t have time to see her because you have to run to the store and walk your dogs and change the oil in your car — but you can do those chores with her .
You can ask her to tag along with you .
You don ’ t have to wait until you have concert tickets or dinner reservations @ @ @ @ @ @ @ her in your normal , day-to-day life and see if she ’ s interested .
She ’ ll probably be excited to be invited .
5 .
Sharing a hobby is the best way to bond .
If you create a routine you can stick to every week , you ’ ll always get plenty of quality time together .
You could sign up for a cooking class or join the same gym or read the same book at the same time so you can discuss it when you see each other .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ you believe you ’ ll both have a fun time experiencing and make sure you stick to it !

1. It doesn’t matter what you’re doing — but it matters that you’re present. She isn’t going to care whether you’re taking her out on some expensive, fancy excursion or whether you’re setting up a fun activity in the middle of your living room. Simply spending time with you is going to be enough. However, you need to be fully present. If you keep checking your texts or scrolling through social media, then she’s going to feel like she only has half of your attention. When she’s with you, she wants your full attention on her. She wants to know you’re happy to be there. She doesn’t want to feel like you have better things to do.
2. You can always make more time. You might feel like you’re too swamped with work to dedicate enough time to your relationship — but you don’t need to spend whole weekends with her in order to make her happy. If you spend your fifteen-minute lunch break on the phone with her or take her out for a quick dinner after your shift, she’s going to be excited. All she wants is to spend time with you. If you are unable to prioritize her, even a little bit, then she’s going to start questioning the relationship. She needs to know she’s an important piece of your world and words aren’t enough. She needs your actions to back up your claims.
3. Make sure you pay close attention to what she’s saying. Even if you’re not staring at your phone, that doesn’t mean you’re actively listening to her. She doesn’t want you to nod along to her stories, pretending to listen. She doesn’t want your mind to wander to other things you need to get done later while she’s in the middle of speaking. She wants to have deep, insightful conversations with you. She wants to know that you’re really connecting. Physically being in the room with her isn’t enough. You need to be there emotionally as well.
4. Even mundane things can give you a chance to connect. You might feel like you don’t have time to see her because you have to run to the store and walk your dogs and change the oil in your car — but you can do those chores with her. You can ask her to tag along with you. You don’t have to wait until you have concert tickets or dinner reservations to see her. You can involve her in your normal, day-to-day life and see if she’s interested. She’ll probably be excited to be invited.
5. Sharing a hobby is the best way to bond. If you create a routine you can stick to every week, you’ll always get plenty of quality time together. You could sign up for a cooking class or join the same gym or read the same book at the same time so you can discuss it when you see each other. The options are endless. Pick whatever you believe you’ll both have a fun time experiencing and make sure you stick to it!


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-16--Allow Yourself To Make Mistakes In 2021

Allow Yourself To Make Mistakes In 2021

Allow yourself to make mistakes in 2021 .
Allow yourself to take chances , even though there ’ s a possibility that things won ’ t work out the way you planned in the end .
Gather up the courage to take a chance on yourself , to follow your heart , to listen to what your gut is saying .
Don ’ t hold yourself back out of fear of the unknown .
Don ’ t decide to settle because you ’ re scared you don ’ t have what it takes to move one step closer to your @ @ @ @ @ @ @ moving forward .
Allow yourself to cry your eyes out in 2021 .
Don ’ t hold back your emotions in order to make other people more comfortable .
Don ’ t pretend you ’ re put together and your world is perfect when there are clearly problems eating away at you .
Stop pressuring yourself to be perfect .
It ’ s okay to have issues .
It ’ s okay to be upset over the bad things that happen to you , even the little things that happen to you .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ you feel .
Your emotions are valid and they deserve to be unleashed .
Allow yourself to admit you don ’ t have all the answers in 2021 .
Get more comfortable saying I don ’ t know instead of pretending that you have knowledge beyond your reach .
You ’ re not expected to know everything .
The smartest people can admit when they are wrong and are always willing to learn more about the world around them .
This year , open yourself up to new experiences .
Let yourself thirst @ @ @ @ @ @ @ to learn and grow .
Allow yourself to call it quits in 2021 .
Allow yourself to walk away from situations that are unhealthy for you .
Say goodbye to the people who no longer deserve a spot in your world .
Refuse to accept unfair treatment from family , friends , and coworkers .
Remember , you don ’ t have to continue doing what you ’ ve always done , simply because you ’ re comfortable .
Sometimes , comfort can hold you back .
Sometimes , stepping outside of your @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
Allow yourself to make a fool of yourself in 2021 .
Post pictures of yourself on social media , even if you don ’ t look perfect in them .
Dance around the kitchen and text jokes to your friends and enjoy your existence without worrying about who is watching .
Make it your mission to create a fun , fulfilling life for yourself instead of following in the footsteps of the people who claim to know better than you .
This is your life .
Live it the way that makes @ @ @ @ @ @ @ smart , be safe , and be your authentic self .
Allow yourself to dream big , crazy dreams in 2021 .
Don ’ t worry about being realistic because who knows what is waiting around the corner .
Don ’ t worry about what other people will say about you behind your back , either , because their opinions are worthless .
Stop paying so much attention to the people on the sidelines and look at the road right in front of you .
You can accomplish beautiful things if you allow @ @ @ @ @ @ @ yourself .
Believe this year might actually be a good one .

Allow yourself to make mistakes in 2021. Allow yourself to take chances, even though there’s a possibility that things won’t work out the way you planned in the end. Gather up the courage to take a chance on yourself, to follow your heart, to listen to what your gut is saying. Don’t hold yourself back out of fear of the unknown. Don’t decide to settle because you’re scared you don’t have what it takes to move one step closer to your dreams. Screw your doubts and keep moving forward.
Allow yourself to cry your eyes out in 2021. Don’t hold back your emotions in order to make other people more comfortable. Don’t pretend you’re put together and your world is perfect when there are clearly problems eating away at you. Stop pressuring yourself to be perfect. It’s okay to have issues. It’s okay to be upset over the bad things that happen to you, even the little things that happen to you. You’re allowed to feel how you feel. Your emotions are valid and they deserve to be unleashed.
Allow yourself to admit you don’t have all the answers in 2021. Get more comfortable saying I don’t know instead of pretending that you have knowledge beyond your reach. You’re not expected to know everything. The smartest people can admit when they are wrong and are always willing to learn more about the world around them. This year, open yourself up to new experiences. Let yourself thirst for knowledge. Make it your mission to learn and grow.
Allow yourself to call it quits in 2021. Allow yourself to walk away from situations that are unhealthy for you. Say goodbye to the people who no longer deserve a spot in your world. Refuse to accept unfair treatment from family, friends, and coworkers. Remember, you don’t have to continue doing what you’ve always done, simply because you’re comfortable. Sometimes, comfort can hold you back. Sometimes, stepping outside of your comfort zone can lead to true happiness.
Allow yourself to make a fool of yourself in 2021. Post pictures of yourself on social media, even if you don’t look perfect in them. Dance around the kitchen and text jokes to your friends and enjoy your existence without worrying about who is watching. Make it your mission to create a fun, fulfilling life for yourself instead of following in the footsteps of the people who claim to know better than you. This is your life. Live it the way that makes the most sense for you. Be smart, be safe, and be your authentic self.
Allow yourself to dream big, crazy dreams in 2021. Don’t worry about being realistic because who knows what is waiting around the corner. Don’t worry about what other people will say about you behind your back, either, because their opinions are worthless. Stop paying so much attention to the people on the sidelines and look at the road right in front of you. You can accomplish beautiful things if you allow yourself to try, so believe in yourself. Believe this year might actually be a good one.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-16--Please Don’t Give Up On Yourself Because Of What Someone Else Did To You

I hope you don ’ t give up on yourself because of what someone else did to you .
I hope you don ’ t believe what they did to you was your fault .
Maybe you made choices that make you think it was your fault , but you have to remember we don ’ t always make the best decisions when we ’ re doing our best to simply survive .
Sometimes when we ’ re living in survival mode we hold onto anyone who holds out a hand even if that hand is deceiving .
These are @ @ @ @ @ @ @ The kind of hands that touch people for their own pleasure .
The kind of hands that get what they want however they want to .
The kind of hands that are weak and don ’ t deserve the souls they take advantage of .
The souls they take advantage of are the kind who love more than the love they receive .
The kind who don ’ t stop caring about others even if others haven ’ t cared enough about them like they are worthy of .
The kind that have @ @ @ @ @ @ @ that are doing their best to keep going even though life keeps beating them down .
The kind that everyone wants to know and love .
Maybe in the season it happened you were trying to be someone you aren ’ t because being yourself was too hard .
Maybe you were trying to escape your reality because your reality became too hard to live in .
Maybe what you believe in was used against you and now you don ’ t know what you believe in .
I hope that no matter @ @ @ @ @ @ @ the peace to believe in yourself .
I hope that no matter what happened to you , you know that you can find whole healing .
I hope you offer yourself all the time you need to find your healing .
People will try to make you talk through it .
People will think they know what ’ s best for you but at the end of the day you are the only one who knows what ’ s best for you .
Trust your instincts .
Trust the inner voice that is @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , I just hope you don ’ t give up on yourself .
I hope you don ’ t give up on the dreams you know you are capable of .
I hope you don ’ t give up on the future you are excited to live with someone who is incredibly good to you .
I hope you know you will find someone who is incredibly good to you if you haven ’ t yet .
I hope you know it ’ s not too late to find that someone .
It @ @ @ @ @ @ @ over because sometimes starting over is the best decision we ’ ll ever make for ourselves .
You deserve to be held by hands that are pure and kind .
I hope you ’ re proud of the person you are because you are someone no one could ever be .

Jacqueline Whitney and Jacqueline Whitney

I hope you don’t give up on yourself because of what someone else did to you.
I hope you don’t believe what they did to you was your fault. Maybe you made choices that make you think it was your fault, but you have to remember we don’t always make the best decisions when we’re doing our best to simply survive. Sometimes when we’re living in survival mode we hold onto anyone who holds out a hand even if that hand is deceiving. These are the kind of hands that lie. The kind of hands that touch people for their own pleasure. The kind of hands that get what they want however they want to. The kind of hands that are weak and don’t deserve the souls they take advantage of.
The souls they take advantage of are the kind who love more than the love they receive. The kind who don’t stop caring about others even if others haven’t cared enough about them like they are worthy of. The kind that have been through too much. The kind that are doing their best to keep going even though life keeps beating them down. The kind that everyone wants to know and love.
Maybe in the season it happened you were trying to be someone you aren’t because being yourself was too hard. Maybe you were trying to escape your reality because your reality became too hard to live in. Maybe what you believe in was used against you and now you don’t know what you believe in. I hope that no matter what happened to you, you find the peace to believe in yourself.
I hope that no matter what happened to you, you know that you can find whole healing. I hope you offer yourself all the time you need to find your healing. People will try to make you talk through it. People will think they know what’s best for you but at the end of the day you are the only one who knows what’s best for you. Trust your instincts. Trust the inner voice that is nurturing and kind.
More than anything, I just hope you don’t give up on yourself. I hope you don’t give up on the dreams you know you are capable of. I hope you don’t give up on the future you are excited to live with someone who is incredibly good to you. I hope you know you will find someone who is incredibly good to you if you haven’t yet. I hope you know it’s not too late to find that someone. It’s never too late to start over because sometimes starting over is the best decision we’ll ever make for ourselves. You deserve to be held by hands that are pure and kind. I hope you’re proud of the person you are because you are someone no one could ever be.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-16--10 Beautiful Life Lessons From ‘How I Met Your Mother’

1 .
“ The future is scary but you can ’ t just run back to the past because it ’ s familiar .
Yes , it ’ s tempting , but it ’ s a mistake.
” — Robin Scherbatsky You don ’ t want to stay in the wrong relationship ( or run back to your ex ) because of your history together .
You deserve to be with someone who fits you perfectly , so don ’ t settle for whoever happens to be around because it ’ s easier than staying single .
2 .
“ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ make that mistake , because then you ’ ll go your whole life not knowing if something was a mistake or not.
” — Lily Aldrin Life is about taking risks .
You can ’ t always play it safe .
Yes , there ’ s a chance that you ’ ll end up failing or getting rejected , but at least you gave your dreams a shot .
At least you were brave enough to put yourself out there .
3 .
“ I don ’ t know where I ’ m @ @ @ @ @ @ @ I don ’ t wan na know .
I want my life to be an adventure.
” — Robin Scherbatsky You have to stop worrying about timelines and setting plans for your future self .
Even though you ’ ve been pressured to know what you want from a young age , it ’ s okay to live in the moment and figure things out as you go .
4 .
“ If you ’ re not scared , then you ’ re not taking a chance .
If you ’ re not @ @ @ @ @ @ @ hell are you doing anyway ?
” – Ted Mosby Fear isn ’ t always a negative .
Sometimes it ’ s a sign you ’ re heading in the right direction .
Sometimes it means the goal you ’ re attempting to reach matters .
It means you ’ re really listening to your heart .
5 .
“ Because sometimes even if you know how something ’ s gon na end , that doesn ’ t mean you can ’ t enjoy the ride.
” — Ted Mosby Some loves are @ @ @ @ @ @ @ mean they are meaningless .
You should enjoy every single moment , even if you can see the expiration date .
Your relationship ( or career or friendship ) might not last , but you can still have fun while it does .
6 .
“ Aren ’ t you tired of waiting for destiny , Ted ?
Isn ’ t it time to make your own destiny ?
” – Robin Scherbatsky You don ’ t have to sit around waiting for good things to happen to you .
You should actively @ @ @ @ @ @ @ waiting for the perfect time to make a move and take the leap !
7 .
“ I realized that I ’ m searching , searching for what I really want in life .
And you know what ?
I have absolutely no idea what that is.
” — Barney Stinson You don ’ t have to have your life figured out in your twenties .
Or thirties .
It ’ s okay if you ’ re still in the process of learning about yourself .
You shouldn ’ t be embarrassed to @ @ @ @ @ @ @ what you want from this world .
8 .
“ You can ask the universe for signs all you want but ultimately we ’ ll only see what we want to see…when we ’ re ready to see it.
” – Ted Mosby No one else can tell you how to live your life .
No one else can make important decisions for you .
It ’ s up to you .
You have complete power over the path you take — and that ’ s a beautiful thing .
9 .
“ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ your life like a building .
You just have to live it…and it ’ ll design itself.
” – Lily Aldrin It doesn ’ t matter how much effort you put into planning the perfect life .
Everything could change in an instant .
Sometimes , your plans are going to fall apart and you ’ re going to fall off path , but that ’ s okay .
That ’ s life .
10 .
“ Shouldn ’ t we hold out for the person who doesn ’ t just tolerate our @ @ @ @ @ @ @ likes them ?
” — Ted Mosby Never settle for someone who can simply handle your baggage .
Find someone who appreciates you .
Someone who encourages you .
Someone who loves every little thing about you , even the parts you were convinced were unlovable .

1. “The future is scary but you can’t just run back to the past because it’s familiar. Yes, it’s tempting, but it’s a mistake.” — Robin Scherbatsky
You don’t want to stay in the wrong relationship (or run back to your ex) because of your history together. You deserve to be with someone who fits you perfectly, so don’t settle for whoever happens to be around because it’s easier than staying single.
2. “The biggest mistake would be not to make that mistake, because then you’ll go your whole life not knowing if something was a mistake or not.” — Lily Aldrin
Life is about taking risks. You can’t always play it safe. Yes, there’s a chance that you’ll end up failing or getting rejected, but at least you gave your dreams a shot. At least you were brave enough to put yourself out there.
3. “I don’t know where I’m gonna be in five years. I don’t wanna know. I want my life to be an adventure.” — Robin Scherbatsky
You have to stop worrying about timelines and setting plans for your future self. Even though you’ve been pressured to know what you want from a young age, it’s okay to live in the moment and figure things out as you go.
4. “If you’re not scared, then you’re not taking a chance. If you’re not taking a chance, then what the hell are you doing anyway?” – Ted Mosby
Fear isn’t always a negative. Sometimes it’s a sign you’re heading in the right direction. Sometimes it means the goal you’re attempting to reach matters. It means you’re really listening to your heart.
5. “Because sometimes even if you know how something’s gonna end, that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the ride.” — Ted Mosby
Some loves are temporary, but that doesn’t mean they are meaningless. You should enjoy every single moment, even if you can see the expiration date. Your relationship (or career or friendship) might not last, but you can still have fun while it does.
6. “Aren’t you tired of waiting for destiny, Ted? Isn’t it time to make your own destiny?” – Robin Scherbatsky
You don’t have to sit around waiting for good things to happen to you. You should actively chase after what you want. Stop waiting for the perfect time to make a move and take the leap!
7. “I realized that I’m searching, searching for what I really want in life. And you know what? I have absolutely no idea what that is.” — Barney Stinson
You don’t have to have your life figured out in your twenties. Or thirties. It’s okay if you’re still in the process of learning about yourself. You shouldn’t be embarrassed to say you honestly aren’t sure what you want from this world.
8. “You can ask the universe for signs all you want but ultimately we’ll only see what we want to see…when we’re ready to see it.” – Ted Mosby
No one else can tell you how to live your life. No one else can make important decisions for you. It’s up to you. You have complete power over the path you take — and that’s a beautiful thing.
9. “Look, you can’t design your life like a building. You just have to live it…and it’ll design itself.” – Lily Aldrin
It doesn’t matter how much effort you put into planning the perfect life. Everything could change in an instant. Sometimes, your plans are going to fall apart and you’re going to fall off path, but that’s okay. That’s life.
10. “Shouldn’t we hold out for the person who doesn’t just tolerate our little quirks, but actually kind of likes them?” — Ted Mosby
Never settle for someone who can simply handle your baggage. Find someone who appreciates you. Someone who encourages you. Someone who loves every little thing about you, even the parts you were convinced were unlovable.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-16--Remember, Toxic Humans Aren’t Toxic All The Time

Toxic humans aren ’ t toxic all the time — and that ’ s the problem .
When someone who has hurt you time and time again suddenly surprises you with a thoughtful present or a sweet compliment , you might forget about the uncomfortable moments you ’ ve shared in the past .
You might start to look at them in a different light .
You might ignore the bad in order to focus on the good .
But you need to understand , humans operate in a gray area .
They aren ’ t one-hundred percent good or @ @ @ @ @ @ @ who are incredibly toxic , the people who you shouldn ’ t keep in your world for any longer , are going to have heartfelt moments .
Moments when they seem sweet and generous .
Moments when it ’ s hard to believe they would ever hurt you again .
You need to remember that even the most toxic people in the world can say and do nice things for you every once in a while .
If you forget that , then you ’ re going to be confused when you ’ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ with affection the next day .
You aren ’ t going to walk away because you ’ ll be convinced they ’ re a good person deep down .
But you shouldn ’ t settle for someone who is good sometimes , someone who treats you well sometimes , someone who comes across as respectful sometimes .
You should be with someone who treats you with respect all the time , even when they ’ re wasted or frustrated or coming home from a long , stressful day .
Toxic humans aren ’ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ you .
That ’ s why it ’ s so hard to leave them .
If they were always nasty , then you would have no reason to stay .
It would be obvious that they don ’ t deserve you .
It would be clear that you need to get the hell away .
The problem is that toxic people can be so damn nice sometimes .
They can treat you with so much love and affection sometimes .
They can make you feel like you ’ re overreacting when they switch @ @ @ @ @ @ @ trouble understanding how someone who is capable of such kindness can also be capable of such cruelty .
It ’ s important to remember that even the kindest people are going to make mistakes — and even the worst people are going to do good deeds every once in a while .
Forgetting how complex human beings are is dangerous .
If you forget , you might think you should stay in a situation that is more bad than good .
If you forget , then you might keep giving someone a chance @ @ @ @ @ @ @ humans aren ’ t toxic all the time .
Sometimes , they will make you laugh .
They will make you feel beautiful .
They will make you feel like you ’ re exactly where you belong .
And that ’ s why it ’ s so hard to spot them when you ’ re in a relationship with one .
That ’ s why leaving is so tricky .
Remember , toxic humans are capable of treating you with kindness some of the time — but you deserve someone who treats you @ @ @ @ @ @ @

Toxic humans aren’t toxic all the time — and that’s the problem. When someone who has hurt you time and time again suddenly surprises you with a thoughtful present or a sweet compliment, you might forget about the uncomfortable moments you’ve shared in the past. You might start to look at them in a different light. You might ignore the bad in order to focus on the good.
But you need to understand, humans operate in a gray area. They aren’t one-hundred percent good or one-hundred percent bad. Even the people who are incredibly toxic, the people who you shouldn’t keep in your world for any longer, are going to have heartfelt moments. Moments when they seem sweet and generous. Moments when it’s hard to believe they would ever hurt you again.
You need to remember that even the most toxic people in the world can say and do nice things for you every once in a while. If you forget that, then you’re going to be confused when you’re disrespected one day and then showered with affection the next day. You aren’t going to walk away because you’ll be convinced they’re a good person deep down.
But you shouldn’t settle for someone who is good sometimes, someone who treats you well sometimes, someone who comes across as respectful sometimes. You should be with someone who treats you with respect all the time, even when they’re wasted or frustrated or coming home from a long, stressful day.
Toxic humans aren’t always going to be mean to you. That’s why it’s so hard to leave them. If they were always nasty, then you would have no reason to stay. It would be obvious that they don’t deserve you. It would be clear that you need to get the hell away.
The problem is that toxic people can be so damn nice sometimes. They can treat you with so much love and affection sometimes. They can make you feel like you’re overreacting when they switch moods and hurt you because you have trouble understanding how someone who is capable of such kindness can also be capable of such cruelty.
It’s important to remember that even the kindest people are going to make mistakes — and even the worst people are going to do good deeds every once in a while. Forgetting how complex human beings are is dangerous. If you forget, you might think you should stay in a situation that is more bad than good. If you forget, then you might keep giving someone a chance long after they deserve you.
Toxic humans aren’t toxic all the time. Sometimes, they will make you laugh. They will make you feel beautiful. They will make you feel like you’re exactly where you belong. And that’s why it’s so hard to spot them when you’re in a relationship with one. That’s why leaving is so tricky.
Remember, toxic humans are capable of treating you with kindness some of the time — but you deserve someone who treats you with kindness all of the time.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-16--30 Questions Your Boyfriend Is Too Scared To Ask You

1 .
We sometimes get random boners .
Do you ever get randomly wet ?
2 .
I ’ ve always heard that perfumed feminine hygiene products are universally hated by women .
True or false ?
3 .
Since you roughly know when you ’ re expecting your period , do you ever use preemptive tampons or pads ?
Or does the period start before you use products ?
4 .
When participating in the online dating apps do you read the profile or is it all about the pictures ?
5 .
In your daily life , how @ @ @ @ @ @ @ a man ?
6 .
Just how aware are you when a dude is staring at your boobs instead of your face ?
7 .
I ’ m a guy and sometimes if it ’ s too hot and humid or too horny , things can get sticky down there .
Do vaginas/labias also get something similar and you have to unstick the lips or something ?
8 .
Why daddy ?
That word has become too sexualized .
I don ’ t want to be called that nor want someone to call @ @ @ @ @ @ @ the subtle hint thing ?
Why not just say it ?
10 .
Boys have a bro code that is universally known by most men , is there a similar girl code/sis code that you girls have to follow ?
11 .
Do you ladies ACTUALLY get unsolicited dick pics sent to you ?
Like , without ever even giving a guy a hint that you might be sexually interested ?
Your phone will go off with a notification , you open it and SURPRISE !
!
PENIS !
?
Does that actually @ @ @ @ @ @ @ like having boobs ?
14 .
Do women make as many jokes about boobs/vaginas in the same way that men make constant dick and ball jokes ?
15 .
When you cross your legs , does it feel like you ’ re squishing anything at all ?
Or is it entirely without feeling ?
16 .
Let ’ s say I ’ m with a group of female friends , including my girlfriend , and I ( as a man ) somehow am the only one to spot a wardrobe malfunction on one @ @ @ @ @ @ @ I bring this to you without being a creep ?
18 .
I had a conversation with some of my female friends and was shocked to find out how often they cry to themselves .
Anywhere from two times a week to almost every day .
Is this a common thing amongst women , and if so , what emotions does it help you work out ?
19.Why the hell do you wear high heels ?
And why do you claim they are comfortable ?
22 .
Have you ever wanted to try @ @ @ @ @ @ @ guy ?
23 .
Would you be creeped out or appreciative of a guy saying you are beautiful ?
24 .
How do you manage to clean yourself with giant nails ?
25 .
Do you play with your boobs ?
26 .
Do you ever get the pee shivers ?
27 .
What does masturbation feel like ?
28 .
Do you feel sexually aroused by being touched on the breasts ?
29 .
What ’ s the best way to turn a woman down if you ’ re not interested ?
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ have pillows nobody is allowed to use ?

Some men from Ask Reddit are sharing the questions they’ve always wanted to ask women.
1. We sometimes get random boners. Do you ever get randomly wet?
2. I’ve always heard that perfumed feminine hygiene products are universally hated by women. True or false?
3. Since you roughly know when you’re expecting your period, do you ever use preemptive tampons or pads? Or does the period start before you use products?
4. When participating in the online dating apps do you read the profile or is it all about the pictures?
5. In your daily life, how often do you feel unsafe because of a man?
6. Just how aware are you when a dude is staring at your boobs instead of your face?
7. I’m a guy and sometimes if it’s too hot and humid or too horny, things can get sticky down there. Do vaginas/labias also get something similar and you have to unstick the lips or something?
8. Why daddy? That word has become too sexualized. I don’t want to be called that nor want someone to call me that.
9. Why do the subtle hint thing? Why not just say it?
10. Boys have a bro code that is universally known by most men, is there a similar girl code/sis code that you girls have to follow?
11. Do you ladies ACTUALLY get unsolicited dick pics sent to you? Like, without ever even giving a guy a hint that you might be sexually interested? Your phone will go off with a notification, you open it and SURPRISE!! PENIS!? Does that actually happen!?
12. Do you like having boobs?
13. Is underboob sweat a thing?
14. Do women make as many jokes about boobs/vaginas in the same way that men make constant dick and ball jokes?
15. When you cross your legs, does it feel like you’re squishing anything at all? Or is it entirely without feeling?
16. Let’s say I’m with a group of female friends, including my girlfriend, and I (as a man) somehow am the only one to spot a wardrobe malfunction on one of my female friends. How should I bring this to you without being a creep?
17. Honest opinion on dad bods?
18. I had a conversation with some of my female friends and was shocked to find out how often they cry to themselves. Anywhere from two times a week to almost every day. Is this a common thing amongst women, and if so, what emotions does it help you work out?
19.Why the hell do you wear high heels? And why do you claim they are comfortable?
20. What makes a guy creepy?
21. How uncomfortable are large breasts?
22. Have you ever wanted to try out how it feels to be a guy?
23. Would you be creeped out or appreciative of a guy saying you are beautiful?
24. How do you manage to clean yourself with giant nails?
25. Do you play with your boobs?
26. Do you ever get the pee shivers?
27. What does masturbation feel like?
28. Do you feel sexually aroused by being touched on the breasts?
29. What’s the best way to turn a woman down if you’re not interested?
30. Why the fuck do you have pillows nobody is allowed to use?


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-16--Why Each Zodiac Sign Loves The Winter Season

You love ice skating and sledding and going on seasonal adventures .
You love the buildup to the holiday season @ @ @ @ @ and the twinkling lights strung across houses .
You love sipping hot cocoa with marshmallows @ @ @ @ @ .
You love watching little children ( or dogs ) run around in the snow @ @ @ @ @ love wearing oversized sweaters and drinking from warm coffee mugs .
You love having an @ @ @ @ @ huddle under blankets while reading .
You love the calming look of the snow and @ @ @ @ @ beneath your feet .
You love the comfort food that your family cooks especially for @ @ @ @ @ holiday-themed coffees and spending hours upon hours shopping .
You love wearing warm leggings and @ @ @ @ @ You love winter fashion .
You love making new year ’ s resolutions and preparing @ @ @ @ @ You love staying cozy in fuzzy socks and turtlenecks and ugly sweaters .

You love ice skating and sledding and going on seasonal adventures.
Taurus
You love the buildup to the holiday season, the cheerful music, and the twinkling lights strung across houses.
Gemini
You love sipping hot cocoa with marshmallows and sitting by crackling fires.
Cancer
You love watching little children (or dogs) run around in the snow, enjoying themselves.
For the person who is always googling astrological compatibility when they meet someone new. How You’ll Do Everything Based On Your Zodiac Sign includes an exhaustive analysis of each sign’s personality. You’ll learn which high school clique represents them (Pisces are the cool art kids), who would get eaten first in a scary movie (Gemini, obviously) to how each sign prefers to say ‘I love you’ (for Taurus, it’s with good food). Alternating between silly, sweet, and serious, this book is filled with deep dives into the mind of everyone whose birth chart you can get your hands on. Buy now
Leo
You love wearing oversized sweaters and drinking from warm coffee mugs.
You love having an excuse to stay inside and huddle under blankets while reading.
Libra
You love the calming look of the snow and the sound of it crunching beneath your feet.
Scorpio
You love the comfort food that your family cooks especially for you.
Sagittarius
You love drinking holiday-themed coffees and spending hours upon hours shopping.
Capricorn
You love wearing warm leggings and boots everywhere you go. You love winter fashion.
You love making new year’s resolutions and preparing for the year ahead.
Pisces
You love staying cozy in fuzzy socks and turtlenecks and ugly sweaters.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-17--Why Each Zodiac Is Having Trouble Getting In The Holiday Spirit This Year

You have more reasons to be upset than to be excited at the moment , and you hate feeling pressured to pretend you ’ re happy .
You aren ’ t able to splurge on presents this year , and you feel guilty about letting down your family and friends .
You haven ’ t watched many holiday movies or listened to many songs , so this month feels like any other month .
You ’ ve been too busy to decorate like usual , so your surroundings don ’ t feel all that cheery and bright .
You aren @ @ @ @ @ @ @ to see your entire family , so this year isn ’ t going to be anything like the years in the past .
You ’ re missing someone you really don ’ t want to spend the holidays without , so you feel like there ’ s no reason to celebrate .
This year hasn ’ t been kind to you , and honestly , you ’ re more excited about it being over soon than about the holiday season .
You ’ ve been so stressed that you haven ’ t even @ @ @ @ @ @ @ You thought they were still a while away .
You can ’ t partake in most of your usual traditions this year , so it doesn ’ t feel like the holidays at all .
You ’ re getting older and realize what a commercial holiday this is , so you ’ re having trouble enjoying it .
There ’ s nothing you want for the holidays this year and no one you ’ re going to see .
You wish you could just skip it .
You feel guilty celebrating when so @ @ @ @ @ @ @

Aries
You have more reasons to be upset than to be excited at the moment, and you hate feeling pressured to pretend you’re happy.
Taurus
You aren’t able to splurge on presents this year, and you feel guilty about letting down your family and friends.
Gemini
You haven’t watched many holiday movies or listened to many songs, so this month feels like any other month.
You’ve been too busy to decorate like usual, so your surroundings don’t feel all that cheery and bright.
For the person who is always googling astrological compatibility when they meet someone new. How You’ll Do Everything Based On Your Zodiac Sign includes an exhaustive analysis of each sign’s personality. You’ll learn which high school clique represents them (Pisces are the cool art kids), who would get eaten first in a scary movie (Gemini, obviously) to how each sign prefers to say ‘I love you’ (for Taurus, it’s with good food). Alternating between silly, sweet, and serious, this book is filled with deep dives into the mind of everyone whose birth chart you can get your hands on. Buy now
Leo
You aren’t going to get the chance to see your entire family, so this year isn’t going to be anything like the years in the past.
Virgo
You’re missing someone you really don’t want to spend the holidays without, so you feel like there’s no reason to celebrate.
This year hasn’t been kind to you, and honestly, you’re more excited about it being over soon than about the holiday season.
Scorpio
You’ve been so stressed that you haven’t even realized the holidays are almost here. You thought they were still a while away.
You can’t partake in most of your usual traditions this year, so it doesn’t feel like the holidays at all.
Capricorn
You’re getting older and realize what a commercial holiday this is, so you’re having trouble enjoying it.
Aquarius
There’s nothing you want for the holidays this year and no one you’re going to see. You wish you could just skip it.
Pisces
You feel guilty celebrating when so many people are suffering right now.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-17--Is ‘The Lie’ A Good Horror Movie Or A Massive Troll?

The Lie American-Canadian psychological horror film that was made in 2018 and just released on Amazon in 2020 .
The ( horrifying ) story has gone viral on TikTok and people feel STRONGLY about this movie .
There will be spoilers in this article because they are necessary to discuss this movie .
PLEASE DISCONTINUE READING IF YOU DO NOT WANT THIS MOVIE TO BE SPOILED FOR YOU .
The plot of the movie is about a girl named Kayla and her friend Britney who seem to be two normal high school girls with good families .
While driving to @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Kayla sees Britney at a bus stop and gets her dad to pick her up and give her a ride .
On the way , the two convince Kayla ’ s father they need to stop and take a bathroom break in the woods .
This is where things take a massive turn .
If you haven ’ t seen the movie , please watch the trailer and then I will discuss the second half of the plot : Kayla ’ s father hears a scream coming from the woods and races to @ @ @ @ @ @ @ When he finds Kayla , she is unsettlingly calm as she explains that the two got in an argument and she pushed Britney off a bridge and into a freezing river .
She assumes Britney is now deceased .
After an unsuccessful search for Britney , Kayla and her father return home .
Kayla ’ s parents argue , but eventually decide to cover up Kayla ’ s actions and allow Britney to become a missing person as they don ’ t believe there is any evidence of Kayla ’ s involvement and @ @ @ @ @ @ @ to be ruined .
This decision seems easy at first , but Britney ’ s dad becomes convinced that Kayla and her parents know more than they are letting on .
In order to keep Kayla from facing the consequences of her actions , her parents invent a story about Britney ’ s dad abusing his daughter and suggest that she ran away from home to escape the abuse or that he killed her .
Kayla talks to the police and confirms that Britney ’ s dad hit her .
Tensions escalate and @ @ @ @ @ @ @ by Kayla ’ s parents to protect the secret .
Here ’ s where things get really unhinged .
The next day Britney arrives at Kayla ’ s house .
It is revealed that Kayla and Britney planned the whole thing together so that Britney could spend the weekend with her boyfriend instead of at the ballet retreat .
Kayla hoped that the event might also bring her divorced parents closer together again .
The movie ends without telling us whether Kayla ’ s parents get away with murder .
Here is a @ @ @ @ @ @ @ As you might guess , viewers and horror fans have a lot of feelings about this movie : In the end , this wouldn ’ t have been a horror movie if our real life impulses weren ’ t so horror-filled .
Our desire to survive and protect those we love is so strong , it might actually be more dangerous than the existence of sadistic psychopaths who can casually torture and innocent person to death .
It turns out the problem here wasn ’ t the boogeyman we thought it was , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ It ’ s hard to tell if The Lie is a really good horror movie because it is so traumatizing to watch , or if it ’ s a cheap shot at the discomfort the director knows we ’ ll feel at the idea that it might be wrong to protect someone we love , especially our offspring .
The Lie is currently streaming free on Prime .

The Lie is an American-Canadian psychological horror film that was made in 2018 and just released on Amazon in 2020. The (horrifying) story has gone viral on TikTok and people feel STRONGLY about this movie. There will be spoilers in this article because they are necessary to discuss this movie. PLEASE DISCONTINUE READING IF YOU DO NOT WANT THIS MOVIE TO BE SPOILED FOR YOU.
The plot of the movie is about a girl named Kayla and her friend Britney who seem to be two normal high school girls with good families. While driving to a ballet retreat with her dad, Kayla sees Britney at a bus stop and gets her dad to pick her up and give her a ride. On the way, the two convince Kayla’s father they need to stop and take a bathroom break in the woods. This is where things take a massive turn. If you haven’t seen the movie, please watch the trailer and then I will discuss the second half of the plot:
Kayla’s father hears a scream coming from the woods and races to find his daughter and her friend. When he finds Kayla, she is unsettlingly calm as she explains that the two got in an argument and she pushed Britney off a bridge and into a freezing river. She assumes Britney is now deceased.
After an unsuccessful search for Britney, Kayla and her father return home. Kayla’s parents argue, but eventually decide to cover up Kayla’s actions and allow Britney to become a missing person as they don’t believe there is any evidence of Kayla’s involvement and they don’t want her future to be ruined.
This decision seems easy at first, but Britney’s dad becomes convinced that Kayla and her parents know more than they are letting on. In order to keep Kayla from facing the consequences of her actions, her parents invent a story about Britney’s dad abusing his daughter and suggest that she ran away from home to escape the abuse or that he killed her. Kayla talks to the police and confirms that Britney’s dad hit her. Tensions escalate and eventually Britney’s dad is killed by Kayla’s parents to protect the secret.
Here’s where things get really unhinged.
The next day Britney arrives at Kayla’s house. It is revealed that Kayla and Britney planned the whole thing together so that Britney could spend the weekend with her boyfriend instead of at the ballet retreat. Kayla hoped that the event might also bring her divorced parents closer together again. The movie ends without telling us whether Kayla’s parents get away with murder.
Here is a very normal response to the end:
As you might guess, viewers and horror fans have a lot of feelings about this movie:
when y’all get the chance, watch “The Lie” on Amazon prime this shit done pissed me off so bad — (mio.) (@MIOTHEGEMINI) December 10, 2020
anyone see “The Lie” on amazon prime?? that movie just pissed me off so bad at the end like i kno it’s just a movie but i’m lividddd🤣 — baby mayo❥ (@hailiemayo) December 16, 2020
If you have amazon prime watch the lie so you can be pissed the fuck off like me WOW — 777 (@basedkev777) December 15, 2020
In the end, this wouldn’t have been a horror movie if our real life impulses weren’t so horror-filled. Our desire to survive and protect those we love is so strong, it might actually be more dangerous than the existence of sadistic psychopaths who can casually torture and innocent person to death. It turns out the problem here wasn’t the boogeyman we thought it was, just our every day human nature. It’s hard to tell if The Lie is a really good horror movie because it is so traumatizing to watch, or if it’s a cheap shot at the discomfort the director knows we’ll feel at the idea that it might be wrong to protect someone we love, especially our offspring.
The Lie is currently streaming free on Prime.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-17--11 Beautiful Love Lessons Blair Waldorf Taught Us

1 .
“ When and if we end up together , it has to be as equals.
” You should never settle for a relationship where you ’ re disrespected .
You should never stay with someone who is unable to see your worth .
You should wait for someone who acts as your teammate , who views you as an equal .
2 .
“ Just because we can ’ t be together doesn ’ t mean I don ’ t love you.
” Sometimes , love is not enough .
Having strong feelings for someone doesn ’ t @ @ @ @ @ @ @ together .
It doesn ’ t mean this person is capable of giving you everything you deserve .
It might be best for you to part ways , even though it ’ s hard .
3 .
“ He ended up treating me like something he owned instead of something he earned.
” You ’ re a catch .
Never forget that fact .
It doesn ’ t matter whether you ’ re in the early stages of your relationship or whether you ’ ve been together for years .
Your partner should @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
They should never act like you ’ re their property .
They should treat you with respect , always .
4 .
“ You deserve someone who would move mountains for you if he had to.
” You shouldn ’ t settle for the first person who shows interest in you .
You shouldn ’ t assume you should take what you can get because it would be greedy to ask for more .
You deserve everything your heart desires .
You deserve someone who would do anything within their power to @ @ @ @ @ @ @ I ’ m not a stop along the way , I ’ m a destination.
” Remember , even though some people might treat you like you ’ re temporary , you ’ re so much more than a fling .
Anyone would be lucky to have you , so don ’ t let a little bit of heartbreak shake your confidence .
6 .
“ Destiny is for losers .
It ’ s just a stupid excuse to wait for things to happen instead of making them happen.
” If you want @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , you should go out there and get them .
Don ’ t sit around , waiting for the timing to be right .
Don ’ t expect someone else to do the work for you .
Nothing good in this world is going to be handed to you .
You need to fight for it .
7 .
“ I don ’ t need a boyfriend to be fulfilled.
” Relationships can be beautiful — but they ’ re not a necessary step toward happiness .
It ’ s entirely possible to @ @ @ @ @ @ @ life .
Regardless of what some people want you to believe , being single isn ’ t the end of the world .
Not at all .
8 .
“ If you go back with an uncertain heart , there will be drama and disaster for all.
” You don ’ t want to play with someone ’ s heart .
You don ’ t want to lead them on when you aren ’ t sure whether they ’ re the one you really want .
Try to be as authentic as possible @ @ @ @ @ @ @ the process of protecting your own .
9 .
“ As you can see , I survived without you.
” Even though your heartbreak might feel like the end of the world , even though it might feel like you will never get over a certain someone , you will survive .
You will come out stronger .
You will prove you don ’ t need a partner in order to thrive .
10 .
“ Forget boys .
Keep your eyes on the prize.
” Even though it might not feel like @ @ @ @ @ @ @ than boys .
If you ’ re unlucky in love right now , focus on your career or friendships or hobbies .
Try your best to create a world where you aren ’ t relying on someone else to bring you happiness .
11 .
“ Have a little faith , and if that doesn ’ t work , have a lot of mimosas.
” When everything in your life is falling apart , spend some time with your friends .
A few laughs ( and a few drinks ) could be exactly @ @ @ @ @ @ @

1. “When and if we end up together, it has to be as equals.”
You should never settle for a relationship where you’re disrespected. You should never stay with someone who is unable to see your worth. You should wait for someone who acts as your teammate, who views you as an equal.
2. “Just because we can’t be together doesn’t mean I don’t love you.”
Sometimes, love is not enough. Having strong feelings for someone doesn’t mean you’re meant to be together. It doesn’t mean this person is capable of giving you everything you deserve. It might be best for you to part ways, even though it’s hard.
3. “He ended up treating me like something he owned instead of something he earned.”
You’re a catch. Never forget that fact. It doesn’t matter whether you’re in the early stages of your relationship or whether you’ve been together for years. Your partner should never take advantage of your soft heart. They should never act like you’re their property. They should treat you with respect, always.
4. “You deserve someone who would move mountains for you if he had to.”
You shouldn’t settle for the first person who shows interest in you. You shouldn’t assume you should take what you can get because it would be greedy to ask for more. You deserve everything your heart desires. You deserve someone who would do anything within their power to see you smile.
5. “I’m not a stop along the way, I’m a destination.”
Remember, even though some people might treat you like you’re temporary, you’re so much more than a fling. Anyone would be lucky to have you, so don’t let a little bit of heartbreak shake your confidence.
6. “Destiny is for losers. It’s just a stupid excuse to wait for things to happen instead of making them happen.”
If you want something (or someone) badly enough, you should go out there and get them. Don’t sit around, waiting for the timing to be right. Don’t expect someone else to do the work for you. Nothing good in this world is going to be handed to you. You need to fight for it.
7. “I don’t need a boyfriend to be fulfilled.”
Relationships can be beautiful — but they’re not a necessary step toward happiness. It’s entirely possible to feel fulfilled without romantic love in your life. Regardless of what some people want you to believe, being single isn’t the end of the world. Not at all.
8. “If you go back with an uncertain heart, there will be drama and disaster for all.”
You don’t want to play with someone’s heart. You don’t want to lead them on when you aren’t sure whether they’re the one you really want. Try to be as authentic as possible. Try not to break hearts in the process of protecting your own.
9. “As you can see, I survived without you.”
Even though your heartbreak might feel like the end of the world, even though it might feel like you will never get over a certain someone, you will survive. You will come out stronger. You will prove you don’t need a partner in order to thrive.
10. “Forget boys. Keep your eyes on the prize.”
Even though it might not feel like it, there are more important things than boys. If you’re unlucky in love right now, focus on your career or friendships or hobbies. Try your best to create a world where you aren’t relying on someone else to bring you happiness.
11. “Have a little faith, and if that doesn’t work, have a lot of mimosas.”
When everything in your life is falling apart, spend some time with your friends. A few laughs (and a few drinks) could be exactly what you need to feel better.


thoughtcatalog--2020-12-17--I Said Goodbye To Someone Toxic, But I Can’t Say Goodbye To The Baggage

I can ’ t sleep through the night .
Any time there ’ s a sudden noise , I bolt awake , my heart pounding , my fear at the forefront of my mind .
You trained me to tune into the smallest sounds , to keep an ear out for signs you were home , signs you were in a bad mood , signs you were going to make someone pay .
Even though you aren ’ t around anymore , even though there ’ s no chance you could track me down again , I can ’ t @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ’ t convince myself everything is okay , the room is safe , I ’ m safe , because my subconscious won ’ t listen to reason .
My body is in the present but my mind keeps getting pulled to the past .
I ’ m never here , not entirely .
I ’ m always dragged back to the hell you created .
I ’ m always living in a waking nightmare .
It was hard to kick you out of my world .
It took all my strength .
It @ @ @ @ @ @ @ me — but even saying goodbye wasn ’ t good enough .
You ’ re still doing damage , even though you ’ re long gone .
You ’ re still making it hard for me to get through my days in one piece , without melting into a puddle of doubt .
I don ’ t want you to have a hold over me anymore , which is why you ’ re out of my world for good now .
It ’ s why you ’ re deleted from my phone , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ accounts .
Unfortunately , I didn ’ t realize saying goodbye to you physically would only be the first step .
I didn ’ t realize the emotional connection would be so much harder to sever .
I didn ’ t realize you weren ’ t going anywhere , not really , not anytime soon .
I might have said goodbye to you , to someone dripping in toxicity , but I can ’ t seem to say goodbye to the baggage you gave me as a parting gift .
It ’ s @ @ @ @ @ @ @ my heart and shoulders .
No matter how hard I try to shake it away , it keeps boomeranging back .
Like it belongs to me .
Like it ’ s mine forever .
Like there ’ s no escape .
But I once thought you yourself were inescapable and proved myself wrong , so I ’ m not giving up yet .
I don ’ t want to be stuck in the past , especially since it ’ s such an uncomfortable place to reside .
I don ’ t want to @ @ @ @ @ @ @ me is still dwelling on yesterday .
I don ’ t want to hurt myself because you ’ ve already done enough of that already .
I want to be free from you , physically , emotionally , spiritually .
I want to move on from the darkness you ’ ve cast overhead .
I want to step out from the shadows and create my own light source .
I want to feel okay again .
You took a lot away from me , but I won ’ t let you steal anymore @ @ @ @ @ @ @ seems neverending , it ’ s getting a little bit better every single day .
Eventually , I ’ m going to sleep through the night .
Eventually , not even the ghost of you is going to haunt me .

I can’t sleep through the night. Any time there’s a sudden noise, I bolt awake, my heart pounding, my fear at the forefront of my mind. You trained me to tune into the smallest sounds, to keep an ear out for signs you were home, signs you were in a bad mood, signs you were going to make someone pay.
Even though you aren’t around anymore, even though there’s no chance you could track me down again, I can’t calm my racing pulse. I can’t convince myself everything is okay, the room is safe, I’m safe, because my subconscious won’t listen to reason. My body is in the present but my mind keeps getting pulled to the past. I’m never here, not entirely. I’m always dragged back to the hell you created. I’m always living in a waking nightmare.
It was hard to kick you out of my world. It took all my strength. It took every ounce of fight left in me — but even saying goodbye wasn’t good enough. You’re still doing damage, even though you’re long gone. You’re still making it hard for me to get through my days in one piece, without melting into a puddle of doubt.
I don’t want you to have a hold over me anymore, which is why you’re out of my world for good now. It’s why you’re deleted from my phone, why you’re blocked from my accounts. Unfortunately, I didn’t realize saying goodbye to you physically would only be the first step. I didn’t realize the emotional connection would be so much harder to sever. I didn’t realize you weren’t going anywhere, not really, not anytime soon.
I might have said goodbye to you, to someone dripping in toxicity, but I can’t seem to say goodbye to the baggage you gave me as a parting gift. It’s still weighing me down, heavy on my heart and shoulders. No matter how hard I try to shake it away, it keeps boomeranging back. Like it belongs to me. Like it’s mine forever. Like there’s no escape.
But I once thought you yourself were inescapable and proved myself wrong, so I’m not giving up yet.
I don’t want to be stuck in the past, especially since it’s such an uncomfortable place to reside. I don’t want to mess up my tomorrows because part of me is still dwelling on yesterday. I don’t want to hurt myself because you’ve already done enough of that already.
I want to be free from you, physically, emotionally, spiritually. I want to move on from the darkness you’ve cast overhead. I want to step out from the shadows and create my own light source.
I want to feel okay again. You took a lot away from me, but I won’t let you steal anymore.
Even though the damage you caused seems neverending, it’s getting a little bit better every single day. Eventually, I’m going to sleep through the night. Eventually, not even the ghost of you is going to haunt me.