vox--2020-12-25--Fox News’s post-Trump identity crisis, explained by an expert

As its main meal ticket prepares to leave office , Fox News is struggling through an identity crisis .
For the better part of five years , Fox and Donald Trump have enjoyed a symbiotic relationship .
Trump ’ s habitual watching of Fox and the willingness both he and other administration officials have had to be interviewed on Fox News and Fox Business brought the network to unprecedented heights of relevance , while Fox has helped Trump by defending him through thick and thin .
But Trump ’ s relationship with Fox hasn ’ t been all sunshine and @ @ @ @ @ @ @ of the network ’ s programming did his bidding in one way or another , Trump has repeatedly lashed out at Fox in recent years for coverage he deems insufficiently fawning — and the one-sided feud has escalated dramatically since his loss to Joe Biden .
“ On a fundamental level Fox has been operating as a propaganda arm of President Trump , but the president has never really been satisfied with the level of obsequiousness he sometimes sees when he turns on his television , ” Matt Gertz , senior fellow at @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
Things came to a boiling point in the days following the election .
Fox News ’ s “ news side , ” such as it is , was among the first on election night to call Arizona for Joe Biden .
Its decision to do so sent President Donald Trump into a rage .
Though the state didn ’ t end up being central to most networks ’ decisions to call the race for Joe Biden , it was a symbolic turning point during a night that quickly went from hopeful to @ @ @ @ @ @ @ s spent the past six weeks seemingly more focused on settling scores with Fox News than he has been on the coronavirus pandemic .
Trump apparently isn ’ t alone in feeling betrayed .
At his urging , many of his followers have turned off Fox News and are watching Newsmax and One America News Network ( OAN ) — Trumpier alternatives to Fox News , which at least during the daytime hours still likes to think of itself as a news channel and not a Trump propaganda network .
To give you @ @ @ @ @ @ @ is refusing to refer to President-elect Biden as “ President-elect , ” based on lies about there being “ fraud in voting.
” Newsmax , meanwhile , recently did an interview with former National Security Adviser Michael Flynn in which Flynn mused about a military coup to keep Trump in office — shocking comments that received no pushback from the host .
Believe it or not , this coverage is resonating .
While they still lag far behind Fox News overall , ratings for Newsmax and OAN have surged since the election while @ @ @ @ @ @ @ a major milestone , Newsmax earlier this month even bested Fox News in a key demographic over an hour of programming .
Fox , meanwhile , is also feeling pressure from the saner end of the spectrum .
CNN ’ s post-election ratings are up and at times have been better than Fox .
For the first time in 20 years , Fox News can no longer boast that it ’ s clearly the top dog in cable news .
Trump can ’ t totally quit Fox News , however .
While he @ @ @ @ @ @ @ side , ” he still habitually live tweets broadcasts hosted by his favorites , such as Sean Hannity and Mark Levin .
During a Fox & Friends interview on election morning , Trump even bashed Fox News while on Fox News .
Along similar lines , Trump ’ s first post-election was on Maria Bartiromo ’ s Sunday morning Fox News show .
And as is often the case , Bartiromo let Trump lie with impunity .
To unpack right-wing cable news ’ s tumultuous situation and where things might go in a @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Gertz , the Media Matters senior fellow and close observer of the right-wing news TV ecosystem .
During the Trump years , Gertz has been distinguished himself as perhaps the foremost chronicler of the Fox News-to-Trump pipeline .
He ’ s tirelessly traced Trump ’ s tweets back to the Fox News segments that inspire them — even when Trump is watching and tweeting programming that aired hours or days earlier .
As the president has started watching more Newsmax and OAN , so has Gertz .
As Gertz explained to me , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ still expects Fox News to play a leading role in setting the conservative agenda , since “ they have the biggest audience and the biggest propensity to produce dangerous misinformation that shifts the public discussion , and the state of policy in this country.
” But Gertz sees signs that Fox News is bowing to the pressure Trump and his supporters are putting on it .
“ We ’ re also seeing a sort of race to the bottom in certain ways .
I think Fox has really kicked up the amount of @ @ @ @ @ @ @ of President Trump ’ s effort to overturn the election because they ’ re feeling some heat from competitors , ” he said .
“ So that , I think , is part of the real risk behind all of us — that it will [ increase ] Fox ’ s need to become ever more conspiracy-minded in years to come.
” A transcript of our conversation , lightly edited for length and clarity , follows .
I thought maybe a good place to start is with your cable news diet .
I @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
What have you on a typical day been watching over the past four years , and has that changed from 2017 to today ?
I ’ ve been at Media Matters since 2007 , so I ’ ve been in one way or another immersed in this right-wing media world ever since .
A lot of my work has focused very specifically on Fox News during the Trump administration , and the way in which its hosts and its shows have become intertwined with President Trump and with other members of his @ @ @ @ @ @ @ been focused on Fox & Friends , the president ’ s favorite morning news show .
I generally have that network on from early in the morning throughout the day .
I will catch clips from shows later that night and read the transcripts the next morning to make sure that I have a good sense of what was going on on all of those primetime and later shows .
But Fox News has been at the center of the conservative media infrastructure for that entire time , and so it ’ s @ @ @ @ @ @ @ biggest development in cable news since the election has been the sudden rise of Newsmax and OAN as in some sense alternatives to Fox News that are further right .
Shockingly , Newsmax ’ s ratings even beat Fox News in a key demographic over an hour of programming earlier this month .
Do you think this is all attributable to Trump and his fans feeling betrayed by Fox ’ s infamous somewhat early call of Arizona for Biden ?
Or is there something else going on here ?
On a fundamental level @ @ @ @ @ @ @ propaganda arm of President Trump , but the president has never really been satisfied with the level of obsequiousness he sometimes sees when he turns on his television .
He ’ s watching as much as or more Fox as I am — and to some extent , I do that for a living — and so when he sees things on his television that he doesn ’ t like , when he sees Democrats appearing on the network , when he sees some of the more so-called “ news side ” shows @ @ @ @ @ @ @ various states , when he sees the state of Arizona getting called for his opponent and then Fox acknowledging Joe Biden is the president-elect , he becomes infuriated .
This has happened throughout the administration .
We have seen here and there , he will lash out at Fox for not going far enough in his favor , and he ’ s even from time to time told his supporters that they should be watching OAN or Newsmax instead .
But since the election , since his defeat , he has been willing @ @ @ @ @ @ @ consistent basis .
He has made the criticisms of Fox News much more frequently on his Twitter feed , and he ’ s actually watching the other networks much more than he used to as well .
I ’ ve been tracking Trump ’ s so-called “ live tweets , ” the cases where he responds in real time to what he ’ s seeing on the television with tweets , since October 2017 .
And he ’ s never sent tweets about that network ’ s competitors the way he has over @ @ @ @ @ @ @ s sent about the same number of tweets between November 15 and December 2 of this year in response to OAN segments as he had over a two-year period .
So his own viewing habits are changing , and he is getting at least some slice of his supporters to change their viewing habits as well .
Do you think it ’ ll be sustainable for Newsmax and OAN to continue on as basically Trump propaganda outlets after he leaves office ?
I wonder if there ’ s going to be the staying @ @ @ @ @ @ @ news through a Trump prism a year or two after he leaves office .
I don ’ t know .
I think what seems pretty clear is that Fox is trying to forestall that by shifting its programming in certain ways .
I have been seeing during the so-called “ straight news ” hours that Fox has started airing clips of its primetime hosts to set up various segments .
They ’ ll air 15 seconds of Tucker Carlson talking about a topic before going into their own discussion about it , or @ @ @ @ @ @ @ s show and asking guests to respond .
So that ’ s the way in which they ’ re trying to change things up a little bit to push back on these competitors .
We ’ re also seeing a sort of race to the bottom in certain ways .
I think Fox has really kicked up the amount of coverage it ’ s done in support of President Trump ’ s effort to overturn the election because they ’ re feeling some heat from competitors .
So that I think is part @ @ @ @ @ @ @ us — that it will [ increase ] Fox ’ s need to become ever more conspiracy-minded in years to come .
It does seem there ’ s been a divide between Fox ’ s daytime programming with Neil Cavuto and Chris Wallace and the primetime lineup .
I ’ ve noticed as well that they ’ re now treating Hannity clips as though they ’ re newsworthy , and then framing panel discussions around them .
But what I hear you saying is that to the extent that Fox News is going @ @ @ @ @ @ @ them shifting more in the direction of making their daytime content more like their primetime content than the other way around .
Yes , I think that is certainly the case .
There is no movement in the opposite direction — there is no indication that the network is considering becoming a better source of information to its viewers .
And there ’ s really a problem there .
Fox ’ s viewers to some extent are counting on the network to provide them with credible information , so when I look back @ @ @ @ @ @ @ coverage that the network has produced , they ’ re lying to their viewers about how much danger they are in from a deadly pandemic , because they think that ’ s better for President Trump and their ratings than leveling with their audience about the real physical danger they are in .
I think you ’ re right to identify what ’ s in Trump ’ s interest as motivating a lot of the editorial choices that Fox has made in recent years , but where do you see that going in @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Biden ?
Do you anticipate that there will be fealty to Trump , even if it ’ s more about appeasing their viewers ?
I ’ ve noticed in some of their programming it seems like they ’ re repositioning themselves as these gadflies chastising the media for not covering Hunter Biden more , or calling out liberal hypocrisy .
How much do you think Trump ’ s interests will drive editorial choices going forward ?
Fox News always takes on the character of the Republican Party of the era .
I think @ @ @ @ @ @ @ a return to what the network was like in 2009 , 2010 .
That ’ s when it emerged as the voice of opposition to President Obama , and they spent eight years fighting his administration on every front possible .
I think their fear , though , is that this competition from OAN and Newsmax will lock them into this current role as a Trump propaganda arm , that they won ’ t be able to establish any distance or even move away from constantly talking about Trump once he ’ s @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Matters has been involved in campaigns targeting advertisers who are doing business with Fox News shows when hosts have said offensive things .
What ’ s the scene like with Newsmax and OAN ?
Do they have robust ad content on those networks ?
Not really .
Neither of them , and OAN in particular , don ’ t have large ratings .
And that keeps them from , certainly , getting blue-chip advertisers .
We ’ re seeing a lot more MyPillow ads on Newsmax in particular over the last several weeks @ @ @ @ @ @ @ owner , they very much try to own that particular demographic , and so they have a ton of ads really propping up Tucker Carlson ’ s show in particular on Fox .
But this is where they are different .
Fox is a propaganda network that sometimes does conspiracy theories but depends on the existence of this “ news side ” that they say is unbiased and like a normal network ’ s , in order to keep blue-chip advertisers on board with at least some of those shows .
OAN is @ @ @ @ @ @ @ propaganda .
It ’ s not in the Nielsen ratings because it doesn ’ t reach a lot of people .
Newsmax is a little bit different .
Newsmax is a grift .
The thing you have to understand about Newsmax is that it ’ s an unprofitable TV business that ’ s welded onto a very profitable digital and newsletter business .
And the reason it ’ s profitable is that it sells out its audience of older conservatives to an assortment of scammers and snake oil salesmen .
So they ’ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ with Fox to build a bigger audience for themselves .
They want to pull those people into their ecosystem and then pitch new viewers on nutritional supplements and the efficacy of natural cures for Alzheimer ’ s , and financial products that protect your savings from the coming waves of hyperinflation — it ’ s absolutely disgusting , but that ’ s where their money comes .
There ’ s been a lot of speculation that after he leaves office , Trump will get involved in right-wing TV in some capacity , whether @ @ @ @ @ @ @ or his own show on an existing network .
He seems pretty committed at this point to aligning himself with OAN and Newsmax while distancing himself from Fox , but do you think there ’ s a chance any of those networks would give him his own show ?
I ’ m skeptical about a lot of these ideas until I see them actually move forward in some way .
Starting your own network from scratch is a huge business endeavor that requires a lot of time and effort and money and relationships @ @ @ @ @ @ @ expecting to see the fabled “ Trump TV ” outlet emerge .
I could be wrong about that , but I ’ ll be skeptical until I see some actual movement on it .
It ’ s hard for me to imagine Newsmax offering him enough money to make it actually worthwhile .
Or certainly OAN — I don ’ t really see that happening either .
The president wants to be able to go on Fox & Friends and talk with Sean Hannity , and so he ’ s gon na do @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
My guess has continued to be that the best way he can make money off his post-presidency is stage shows .
Basically Trump rallies , but for profit .
That seems like a thing he could do that doesn ’ t involve a lot of work , and frankly I ’ m skeptical he will do anything in the media that does require a lot of work .
I mean , his interviews are basically riffing .
You could imagine him maybe doing some sort of digital streaming show where , again @ @ @ @ @ @ @ do much but sit in front of a camera and mug and do his stream of consciousness about the issues of the day .
But my thing on this is that the continuum is from “ things that won ’ t happen because they are a lot of work ” to “ things that could happen because they are not a lot of work.
” To bring things full circle , what do you anticipate your cable news diet will look like post-Trump ?
What does a new president mean for what you @ @ @ @ @ @ @ perhaps live-tweeting ?
I think it could end up being a lot more fractured .
The media environment in general has become a lot more fractured over the past several years , and if some of these cable news networks do get more of a footprint , they ’ ll be worth tuning in to now and again .
There are also plenty of conservative digital outlets I ’ ll be paying attention to , since they can feed into the rest of the discourse .
But I imagine I ’ ll still @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Fox News .
They have the biggest audience and the biggest propensity to produce dangerous misinformation that shifts the public discussion and the state of policy in this country .

As its main meal ticket prepares to leave office, Fox News is struggling through an identity crisis.
For the better part of five years, Fox and Donald Trump have enjoyed a symbiotic relationship. Trump’s habitual watching of Fox and the willingness both he and other administration officials have had to be interviewed on Fox News and Fox Business brought the network to unprecedented heights of relevance, while Fox has helped Trump by defending him through thick and thin.
But Trump’s relationship with Fox hasn’t been all sunshine and rainbows. Even while the vast majority of the network’s programming did his bidding in one way or another, Trump has repeatedly lashed out at Fox in recent years for coverage he deems insufficiently fawning — and the one-sided feud has escalated dramatically since his loss to Joe Biden.
“On a fundamental level Fox has been operating as a propaganda arm of President Trump, but the president has never really been satisfied with the level of obsequiousness he sometimes sees when he turns on his television,” Matt Gertz, senior fellow at Media Matters for America, told me.
Things came to a boiling point in the days following the election. Fox News’s “news side,” such as it is, was among the first on election night to call Arizona for Joe Biden. Its decision to do so sent President Donald Trump into a rage. Though the state didn’t end up being central to most networks’ decisions to call the race for Joe Biden, it was a symbolic turning point during a night that quickly went from hopeful to sour for the president. He’s spent the past six weeks seemingly more focused on settling scores with Fox News than he has been on the coronavirus pandemic.
.@FoxNews daytime ratings have completely collapsed. Weekend daytime even WORSE. Very sad to watch this happen, but they forgot what made them successful, what got them there. They forgot the Golden Goose. The biggest difference between the 2016 Election, and 2020, was @FoxNews! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) November 12, 2020
Trump apparently isn’t alone in feeling betrayed. At his urging, many of his followers have turned off Fox News and are watching Newsmax and One America News Network (OAN) — Trumpier alternatives to Fox News, which at least during the daytime hours still likes to think of itself as a news channel and not a Trump propaganda network.
.@FoxNews daytime is not watchable. In a class with CNN & MSDNC. Check out @OANN, @newsmax and others that are picking up the slack. Even a boring football game, kneeling and all, is better! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 6, 2020
To give you a flavor for their programming, OAN is refusing to refer to President-elect Biden as “President-elect,” based on lies about there being “fraud in voting.” Newsmax, meanwhile, recently did an interview with former National Security Adviser Michael Flynn in which Flynn mused about a military coup to keep Trump in office — shocking comments that received no pushback from the host.
Here's Michael Flynn on Newsmax saying that Trump could order "military capabilities" to swing states and "rerun an election in each of those states."
"People out there talk about martial law like it's something that we've never done. Martial law has been instituted 64 times." pic.twitter.com/KNmiAGGiPF — Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) December 18, 2020
Believe it or not, this coverage is resonating. While they still lag far behind Fox News overall, ratings for Newsmax and OAN have surged since the election while Fox’s have stagnated. In a major milestone, Newsmax earlier this month even bested Fox News in a key demographic over an hour of programming.
Fox, meanwhile, is also feeling pressure from the saner end of the spectrum. CNN’s post-election ratings are up and at times have been better than Fox. For the first time in 20 years, Fox News can no longer boast that it’s clearly the top dog in cable news.
Trump can’t totally quit Fox News, however. While he lambasts the network’s “news side,” he still habitually live tweets broadcasts hosted by his favorites, such as Sean Hannity and Mark Levin. During a Fox & Friends interview on election morning, Trump even bashed Fox News while on Fox News.
Brian Kilmeade gives Trump the opportunity to respond to Obama and instead he lays out his grievances against Fox for sometimes airing Biden speeches before listing all the hosts he likes. pic.twitter.com/WSRlXDrQjL — Matthew Gertz (@MattGertz) November 3, 2020
Along similar lines, Trump’s first post-election was on Maria Bartiromo’s Sunday morning Fox News show. And as is often the case, Bartiromo let Trump lie with impunity.
Trump's own lawyers conceded in court that the claim he makes here about poll watchers is a lie -- but Maria Bartiromo lets Trump lie with impunity pic.twitter.com/5nyfc4XnsF — Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) November 29, 2020
To unpack right-wing cable news’s tumultuous situation and where things might go in a post-President Trump world, I talked to Gertz, the Media Matters senior fellow and close observer of the right-wing news TV ecosystem.
During the Trump years, Gertz has distinguished himself as perhaps the foremost chronicler of the Fox News-to-Trump pipeline. He’s tirelessly traced Trump’s tweets back to the Fox News segments that inspire them — even when Trump is watching and tweeting programming that aired hours or days earlier.
The president of the United States is so busy that he's watching a recording of a Fox Business show that aired Sunday morning and tweeting about it.
Left, Fox Business' Sunday Morning Futures, 10:24 a.m. yesterday
Right, Trump, 8:37 a.m. pic.twitter.com/e7YJA7zOcd — Matthew Gertz (@MattGertz) January 6, 2020
As the president has started watching more Newsmax and OAN, so has Gertz.
An ongoing shift in the president's viewing habits from Fox to the even more conspiracy-minded OAN. https://t.co/bQ3jFMr1Ku
Left, OAN, 7:46 a.m.
Right, Trump, 8:14 a.m. pic.twitter.com/sc45i8bIrZ — Matthew Gertz (@MattGertz) December 4, 2020
As Gertz explained to me, even in a post-Trump world, he still expects Fox News to play a leading role in setting the conservative agenda, since “they have the biggest audience and the biggest propensity to produce dangerous misinformation that shifts the public discussion, and the state of policy in this country.”
But Gertz sees signs that Fox News is bowing to the pressure Trump and his supporters are putting on it.
“We’re also seeing a sort of race to the bottom in certain ways. I think Fox has really kicked up the amount of coverage it’s done in support of President Trump’s effort to overturn the election because they’re feeling some heat from competitors,” he said. “So that, I think, is part of the real risk behind all of us — that it will [increase] Fox’s need to become ever more conspiracy-minded in years to come.”
A transcript of our conversation, lightly edited for length and clarity, follows.
Aaron Rupar
I thought maybe a good place to start is with your cable news diet. I know you watch a lot of it. What have you on a typical day been watching over the past four years, and has that changed from 2017 to today?
Matt Gertz
I’ve been at Media Matters since 2007, so I’ve been in one way or another immersed in this right-wing media world ever since. A lot of my work has focused very specifically on Fox News during the Trump administration, and the way in which its hosts and its shows have become intertwined with President Trump and with other members of his team.
A lot of that has been focused on Fox & Friends, the president’s favorite morning news show. I generally have that network on from early in the morning throughout the day. I will catch clips from shows later that night and read the transcripts the next morning to make sure that I have a good sense of what was going on on all of those primetime and later shows.
But Fox News has been at the center of the conservative media infrastructure for that entire time, and so it’s been my main focus.
Aaron Rupar
Perhaps the biggest development in cable news since the election has been the sudden rise of Newsmax and OAN as in some sense alternatives to Fox News that are further right. Shockingly, Newsmax’s ratings even beat Fox News in a key demographic over an hour of programming earlier this month.
Do you think this is all attributable to Trump and his fans feeling betrayed by Fox’s infamous somewhat early call of Arizona for Biden? Or is there something else going on here?
Matt Gertz
On a fundamental level, Fox has been operating as a propaganda arm of President Trump, but the president has never really been satisfied with the level of obsequiousness he sometimes sees when he turns on his television.
He’s watching as much as or more Fox as I am — and to some extent, I do that for a living — and so when he sees things on his television that he doesn’t like, when he sees Democrats appearing on the network, when he sees some of the more so-called “news side” shows presenting Fox polling that shows him losing various states, when he sees the state of Arizona getting called for his opponent and then Fox acknowledging Joe Biden is the president-elect, he becomes infuriated.
This has happened throughout the administration. We have seen here and there, he will lash out at Fox for not going far enough in his favor, and he’s even from time to time told his supporters that they should be watching OAN or Newsmax instead. But since the election, since his defeat, he has been willing to do that on a far more consistent basis. He has made the criticisms of Fox News much more frequently on his Twitter feed, and he’s actually watching the other networks much more than he used to as well.
I’ve been tracking Trump’s so-called “live tweets,” the cases where he responds in real time to what he’s seeing on the television with tweets, since October 2017. And he’s never sent tweets about that network’s competitors the way he has over the past few weeks. He’s sent about the same number of tweets between November 15 and December 2 of this year in response to OAN segments as he had over a two-year period.
Looking back at Trump live-tweets since Nov. 19, I count:
Fox News/Business: 11
OAN: 10
Newsmax: 3
Trump sent only 12 OAN live-tweets total over a recent two-year span, compared to more than 1,200 Fox News/Business. https://t.co/UBNZMWCrUG — Matthew Gertz (@MattGertz) December 2, 2020
So his own viewing habits are changing, and he is getting at least some slice of his supporters to change their viewing habits as well.
Aaron Rupar
Do you think it’ll be sustainable for Newsmax and OAN to continue on as basically Trump propaganda outlets after he leaves office? I wonder if there’s going to be the staying power in terms of filtering all the news through a Trump prism a year or two after he leaves office.
Matt Gertz
I don’t know. I think what seems pretty clear is that Fox is trying to forestall that by shifting its programming in certain ways.
I have been seeing during the so-called “straight news” hours that Fox has started airing clips of its primetime hosts to set up various segments. They’ll air 15 seconds of Tucker Carlson talking about a topic before going into their own discussion about it, or playing a clip from Sean Hannity’s show and asking guests to respond. So that’s the way in which they’re trying to change things up a little bit to push back on these competitors.
Fox "straight news" broadcast America's Newsroom is increasingly a show about what happened in Fox prime-time the previous night. pic.twitter.com/unkNQIv3ll — Matthew Gertz (@MattGertz) November 19, 2020
We’re also seeing a sort of race to the bottom in certain ways. I think Fox has really kicked up the amount of coverage it’s done in support of President Trump’s effort to overturn the election because they’re feeling some heat from competitors. So that I think is part of the real risk behind all of this — that it will [increase] Fox’s need to become ever more conspiracy-minded in years to come.
Aaron Rupar
It does seem there’s been a divide between Fox’s daytime programming with Neil Cavuto and Chris Wallace and the primetime lineup. I’ve noticed as well that they’re now treating Hannity clips as though they’re newsworthy, and then framing panel discussions around them.
But what I hear you saying is that to the extent that Fox News is going to have to choose, you see them shifting more in the direction of making their daytime content more like their primetime content than the other way around.
Matt Gertz
Yes, I think that is certainly the case. There is no movement in the opposite direction — there is no indication that the network is considering becoming a better source of information to its viewers.
And there’s really a problem there. Fox’s viewers to some extent are counting on the network to provide them with credible information, so when I look back on the past 10 months of pandemic coverage that the network has produced, they’re lying to their viewers about how much danger they are in from a deadly pandemic, because they think that’s better for President Trump and their ratings than leveling with their audience about the real physical danger they are in.
Dec. 8: Laura Ingraham criticizes the "concerted campaign to vilify and dismiss and demean, and frankly lie about it, the ineffectiveness of" hydroxychloroquine.
This alternative history that lets Trump off the hook will be a permanent feature of right-wing commentary. pic.twitter.com/OXmsMRmkCc — Matthew Gertz (@MattGertz) December 9, 2020
Aaron Rupar
I think you’re right to identify what’s in Trump’s interest as motivating a lot of the editorial choices that Fox has made in recent years, but where do you see that going in the months to come under a President Biden? Do you anticipate that there will be fealty to Trump, even if it’s more about appeasing their viewers?
I’ve noticed in some of their programming it seems like they’re repositioning themselves as these gadflies chastising the media for not covering Hunter Biden more, or calling out liberal hypocrisy.
lots of tears being shed on Fox News' Outnumbered Overtime today pic.twitter.com/B8jGwbDdcB — Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) December 17, 2020
How much do you think Trump’s interests will drive editorial choices going forward?
Matt Gertz
Fox News always takes on the character of the Republican Party of the era. I think their hope is that they can make a return to what the network was like in 2009, 2010. That’s when it emerged as the voice of opposition to President Obama, and they spent eight years fighting his administration on every front possible.
I think their fear, though, is that this competition from OAN and Newsmax will lock them into this current role as a Trump propaganda arm, that they won’t be able to establish any distance or even move away from constantly talking about Trump once he’s out of office.
Aaron Rupar
I know Media Matters has been involved in campaigns targeting advertisers who are doing business with Fox News shows when hosts have said offensive things. What’s the scene like with Newsmax and OAN? Do they have robust ad content on those networks?
Matt Gertz
Not really. Neither of them, and OAN in particular, don’t have large ratings. And that keeps them from, certainly, getting blue-chip advertisers. We’re seeing a lot more MyPillow ads on Newsmax in particular over the last several weeks. [MyPillow] has a conservative owner, they very much try to own that particular demographic, and so they have a ton of ads really propping up Tucker Carlson’s show in particular on Fox.
Four different My Pillow ads for four different products, all of which ran on Tucker Carlson's show tonight. pic.twitter.com/byIG9W7xfr — Matthew Gertz (@MattGertz) July 14, 2020
But this is where they are different. Fox is a propaganda network that sometimes does conspiracy theories but depends on the existence of this “news side” that they say is unbiased and like a normal network’s, in order to keep blue-chip advertisers on board with at least some of those shows. OAN is a conspiracy theory network that sometimes does propaganda. It’s not in the Nielsen ratings because it doesn’t reach a lot of people.
Newsmax is a little bit different. Newsmax is a grift. The thing you have to understand about Newsmax is that it’s an unprofitable TV business that’s welded onto a very profitable digital and newsletter business. And the reason it’s profitable is that it sells out its audience of older conservatives to an assortment of scammers and snake oil salesmen.
So they’re using Trump’s current feud with Fox to build a bigger audience for themselves. They want to pull those people into their ecosystem and then pitch new viewers on nutritional supplements and the efficacy of natural cures for Alzheimer’s, and financial products that protect your savings from the coming waves of hyperinflation — it’s absolutely disgusting, but that’s where their money comes.
Aaron Rupar
There’s been a lot of speculation that after he leaves office, Trump will get involved in right-wing TV in some capacity, whether it’s with his own network or his own show on an existing network. He seems pretty committed at this point to aligning himself with OAN and Newsmax while distancing himself from Fox, but do you think there’s a chance any of those networks would give him his own show?
Matt Gertz
I’m skeptical about a lot of these ideas until I see them actually move forward in some way. Starting your own network from scratch is a huge business endeavor that requires a lot of time and effort and money and relationships, and so I really am not expecting to see the fabled “Trump TV” outlet emerge. I could be wrong about that, but I’ll be skeptical until I see some actual movement on it.
It’s hard for me to imagine Newsmax offering him enough money to make it actually worthwhile. Or certainly OAN — I don’t really see that happening either. The president wants to be able to go on Fox & Friends and talk with Sean Hannity, and so he’s gonna do something that lets him keep doing that.
My guess has continued to be that the best way he can make money off his post-presidency is stage shows. Basically Trump rallies, but for profit. That seems like a thing he could do that doesn’t involve a lot of work, and frankly I’m skeptical he will do anything in the media that does require a lot of work.
I mean, his interviews are basically riffing. You could imagine him maybe doing some sort of digital streaming show where, again, he doesn’t need to do much but sit in front of a camera and mug and do his stream of consciousness about the issues of the day. But my thing on this is that the continuum is from “things that won’t happen because they are a lot of work” to “things that could happen because they are not a lot of work.”
Aaron Rupar
To bring things full circle, what do you anticipate your cable news diet will look like post-Trump? What does a new president mean for what you’ll be paying attention to and perhaps live-tweeting?
Matt Gertz
I think it could end up being a lot more fractured. The media environment in general has become a lot more fractured over the past several years, and if some of these cable news networks do get more of a footprint, they’ll be worth tuning in to now and again. There are also plenty of conservative digital outlets I’ll be paying attention to, since they can feed into the rest of the discourse.
But I imagine I’ll still be paying a lot of attention to Fox News. They have the biggest audience and the biggest propensity to produce dangerous misinformation that shifts the public discussion and the state of policy in this country.


vox--2020-12-25--The history of Jews, Chinese food, and Christmas, explained by a rabbi

For over a century , American Jews have eaten American Chinese food on Christmas .
The annual feast is a holiday tradition that is likely to go on as usual this year , even in the midst of COVID-19 — albeit in the form of delivery or takeout .
This pastime has evolved to a near-holy tradition , parodied on Saturday Night Live , analyzed in academic papers , and reaffirmed by Supreme Court Justice Elena Kagan .
Perhaps the foremost expert on the practice is Rabbi Joshua Eli Plaut , PhD , executive director of American Friends of Rabin @ @ @ @ @ @ @ in New York , and author of A Kosher Christmas , the premier ( and only ? )
comprehensive study of what Jews do at Christmastime .
I spoke to Plaut about Chinese food on Christmas , and why he used to sit on Santa Claus ’ s lap .
Both Jews and Christmas have existed for a while .
When did Jews first ask , “ What should we do on Christmas ?
” It has been a question for as long as Christmas has existed , because Jews have always felt @ @ @ @ @ @ @ specifically was really a function of their status in society .
In Eastern Europe , for instance , Jews were not very assimilated .
Christmas was a night of possible pogroms and violence , with so many celebrants , often drunk , going from house to house .
Jews did not go to the synagogue to study .
They stayed at home for physical safety reasons .
If they did anything , they might play cards or chess .
In Western Europe , after the French Revolution , Jews were more assimilated .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ wonder , “ Do I bring a Christmas tree into my home ?
Do I have a holiday meal ?
Do I give out gifts ?
” The early Zionist Theodor Herzl was a secular Jew , and he had a Christmas tree in his salon .
After the Chief Rabbi of Vienna came to visit , he wrote something in his diary like , ” I hope the Rabbi doesn ’ t think less of me because of this .
Then again , what do I care what he thinks ?
” @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Chinese food on Christmas first comes into the picture .
Is that a Jewish-American tradition ?
Yes .
It begins at the end of the 19th century , on the Lower East Side , where Jewish and Chinese immigrants lived in close proximity .
The very first mention of American Jews eating in a Chinese restaurant dates to 1899 , when the American Hebrew journal criticized Jews for eating at non-kosher restaurants .
By 1936 , a publication called the East Side Chamber News reported at least 18 Chinese tea gardens and chop @ @ @ @ @ @ @ All of these were within close walking distance of Ratner ’ s , which was then the most famous Jewish dairy restaurant in Manhattan .
Jews would go out for Chinese food on Sundays , when they felt left out of church lunch .
It was a gradual transition from the traditional diet of Eastern Europe , to eating American Chinese food , to eating other pan-Asian cuisines , like Indian food .
I like to say that , within a hundred years of arriving in New York , the average Jew was @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
In the last 35 years , Chinese restaurants on Christmas have really become this sort of temporary community where Jews in the United States can gather to be with friends and family .
It ’ s a secular way to celebrate Christmas , but it ’ s also a time to shut out Christmas and announce your Jewish identity in a safe environment .
Was there any reason , beyond proximity , that Jews wound up eating Chinese food , as opposed to some other immigrant cuisine ?
In terms of kosher @ @ @ @ @ @ @ lot safer than an Italian restaurant .
In Italian food , there is mixing of meat and dairy .
A Chinese restaurant doesn ’ t mix meat and dairy , because Chinese cooking is virtually dairy-free .
Within a hundred years of arriving in New York , the average Jew was more familiar with sushi than gefilte fish In Chinese-American cooking , if there is any pork [ which is not a kosher food ] , it is usually concealed inside something , like a wonton .
A lot of Jews back then @ @ @ @ @ @ @ kosher inside the home but were more flexible with foods they ate at restaurants .
Sociologist Gaye Tuchman wrote about this practice .
She described [ the plausible deniability of non-kosher ingredients ] as safe treyf .
[ Treyf is the Yiddish word for non-kosher . ]
A lot of Jews considered the pork in Chinese food to be safe treyf , because they couldn ’ t see it .
That made it easier to eat .
In your research for this book , did you come across anything about Chinese food and @ @ @ @ @ @ @ I actually found a citation from 1935 , in the New York Times , about a restaurant owner named Eng Shee Chuck who brought chow mein to the Jewish Children ’ s Home on Christmas Day .
If you were to interview Chinese restaurant owners , they ’ d tell you that Christmas is their biggest day of the year , outside of probably the Chinese New Year .
If you want a more thorough understanding , though , you should probably go talk to some restaurant owners in Chinatown .
Sometimes my @ @ @ @ @ @ @ but we always go to the movies .
When did that become an established Jewish Christmas tradition ?
When Jews began to settle on the Lower East Side of Manhattan between the 1880s and the 1920s , they were poor immigrants .
They worked in sweatshops and lived in tenement housing .
In their time off , they would go to the newly opened nickelodeons .
For between one cent and five cents , they could see a very early form of a movie .
By 1909 , there were 42 nickelodeons adjacent @ @ @ @ @ @ @ uptown in Jewish Harlem .
Christmas was just another day off , so these early movies attracted big crowds .
We know from the Yiddish press that Christmas became a popular day for the opening of new Yiddish theater productions .
It was a day off from work , so what do you do ?
You can stay home , or you can go to the nickelodeons , or the Yiddish theater .
Eventually , decades later , you could go have a meal in a Chinese restaurant .
What do you usually @ @ @ @ @ @ @ I was researching this book .
This year , I ’ ll be with my family in a small town , where there are no real restaurants open .
We will probably play a board game or watch Netflix .
What did you do on Christmas growing up ?
I never went to Chinese restaurants .
We ’ d go skating in front of the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree , and then we ’ d have hot chocolate with marshmallows .
I have great memories of Christmas .
My mother would take me @ @ @ @ @ @ @ lap .
When I was writing this book , I asked her , “ Why did you take me — the son of a rabbi !
— to sit on Santa Claus ’ s lap ?
” She said , “ Everybody in America does it , so why shouldn ’ t we ?
” She knew I was secure in my Jewish identity .

For over a century, American Jews have eaten American Chinese food on Christmas. The annual feast is a holiday tradition that is likely to go on as usual this year, even in the midst of COVID-19 — albeit in the form of delivery or takeout. This pastime has evolved to a near-holy tradition, parodied on Saturday Night Live, analyzed in academic papers, and reaffirmed by Supreme Court Justice Elena Kagan.
Perhaps the foremost expert on the practice is Rabbi Joshua Eli Plaut, PhD, executive director of American Friends of Rabin Medical Center, rabbi of Metropolitan Synagogue in New York, and author of A Kosher Christmas, the premier (and only?) comprehensive study of what Jews do at Christmastime.
I spoke to Plaut about Chinese food on Christmas, and why he used to sit on Santa Claus’s lap.
Both Jews and Christmas have existed for a while. When did Jews first ask, “What should we do on Christmas?”
It has been a question for as long as Christmas has existed, because Jews have always felt like outsiders. But how they felt specifically was really a function of their status in society. In Eastern Europe, for instance, Jews were not very assimilated. Christmas was a night of possible pogroms and violence, with so many celebrants, often drunk, going from house to house. Jews did not go to the synagogue to study. They stayed at home for physical safety reasons. If they did anything, they might play cards or chess.
In Western Europe, after the French Revolution, Jews were more assimilated. There, they had more freedom to wonder, “Do I bring a Christmas tree into my home? Do I have a holiday meal? Do I give out gifts?” The early Zionist Theodor Herzl was a secular Jew, and he had a Christmas tree in his salon. After the Chief Rabbi of Vienna came to visit, he wrote something in his diary like, ”I hope the Rabbi doesn’t think less of me because of this. Then again, what do I care what he thinks?”
Okay, so tell me when eating Chinese food on Christmas first comes into the picture. Is that a Jewish-American tradition?
Yes. It begins at the end of the 19th century, on the Lower East Side, where Jewish and Chinese immigrants lived in close proximity. The very first mention of American Jews eating in a Chinese restaurant dates to 1899, when the American Hebrew journal criticized Jews for eating at non-kosher restaurants. By 1936, a publication called the East Side Chamber News reported at least 18 Chinese tea gardens and chop suey eateries in heavily-populated Jewish neighborhoods. All of these were within close walking distance of Ratner’s, which was then the most famous Jewish dairy restaurant in Manhattan.
Jews would go out for Chinese food on Sundays, when they felt left out of church lunch. It was a gradual transition from the traditional diet of Eastern Europe, to eating American Chinese food, to eating other pan-Asian cuisines, like Indian food. I like to say that, within a hundred years of arriving in New York, the average Jew was more familiar with sushi than gefilte fish.
In the last 35 years, Chinese restaurants on Christmas have really become this sort of temporary community where Jews in the United States can gather to be with friends and family. It’s a secular way to celebrate Christmas, but it’s also a time to shut out Christmas and announce your Jewish identity in a safe environment.
Was there any reason, beyond proximity, that Jews wound up eating Chinese food, as opposed to some other immigrant cuisine?
In terms of kosher law, a Chinese restaurant is a lot safer than an Italian restaurant. In Italian food, there is mixing of meat and dairy. A Chinese restaurant doesn’t mix meat and dairy, because Chinese cooking is virtually dairy-free.
Within a hundred years of arriving in New York, the average Jew was more familiar with sushi than gefilte fish
In Chinese-American cooking, if there is any pork [which is not a kosher food], it is usually concealed inside something, like a wonton. A lot of Jews back then — and even now — kept strict kosher inside the home but were more flexible with foods they ate at restaurants. Sociologist Gaye Tuchman wrote about this practice. She described [the plausible deniability of non-kosher ingredients] as safe treyf. [Treyf is the Yiddish word for non-kosher.] A lot of Jews considered the pork in Chinese food to be safe treyf, because they couldn’t see it. That made it easier to eat.
In your research for this book, did you come across anything about Chinese food and Christmas written from a Chinese-American perspective?
I actually found a citation from 1935, in the New York Times, about a restaurant owner named Eng Shee Chuck who brought chow mein to the Jewish Children’s Home on Christmas Day. If you were to interview Chinese restaurant owners, they’d tell you that Christmas is their biggest day of the year, outside of probably the Chinese New Year. If you want a more thorough understanding, though, you should probably go talk to some restaurant owners in Chinatown.
Sometimes my family eats Chinese food on Christmas, but we always go to the movies. When did that become an established Jewish Christmas tradition?
When Jews began to settle on the Lower East Side of Manhattan between the 1880s and the 1920s, they were poor immigrants. They worked in sweatshops and lived in tenement housing. In their time off, they would go to the newly opened nickelodeons. For between one cent and five cents, they could see a very early form of a movie. By 1909, there were 42 nickelodeons adjacent to the Lower East Side and 10 uptown in Jewish Harlem. Christmas was just another day off, so these early movies attracted big crowds.
We know from the Yiddish press that Christmas became a popular day for the opening of new Yiddish theater productions. It was a day off from work, so what do you do? You can stay home, or you can go to the nickelodeons, or the Yiddish theater. Eventually, decades later, you could go have a meal in a Chinese restaurant.
What do you usually do on Christmas?
For many years I was researching this book. This year, I’ll be with my family in a small town, where there are no real restaurants open. We will probably play a board game or watch Netflix.
What did you do on Christmas growing up?
I never went to Chinese restaurants. We’d go skating in front of the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree, and then we’d have hot chocolate with marshmallows. I have great memories of Christmas. My mother would take me to sit on Santa Claus’s lap. When I was writing this book, I asked her, “Why did you take me — the son of a rabbi! — to sit on Santa Claus’s lap?” She said, “Everybody in America does it, so why shouldn’t we?” She knew I was secure in my Jewish identity.


vox--2020-12-25--One Good Thing: The gentle, lovely beauty of the YouTube Christmas coffee shop

One Good Thing is Vox ’ s recommendations feature .
In each edition , find one more thing from the world of culture that we highly recommend .
This Christmas has felt different .
Normally I find myself eagerly anticipating the end of the year — I look forward to the presents , the well wishes from friends and strangers alike , the time off from work .
It ’ s a chance to look back over the year that was and prepare for the year to come .
The world changes , but this time of year , these @ @ @ @ @ @ @ as similar as possible .
We like these little islands of time that change a bit more slowly than the rest of our lives .
In 2020 , however , it ’ s harder to appreciate that island of time when time has ceased to have meaning .
Each day blends into the next , and as I write this ( on December 23 ) , it ’ s hard to believe that Christmas is just two days away , even though looking at my calendar will tell me that it is .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ my tree .
I ’ ll get to it when I get to it , maybe on December 27 or something .
YouTube , as always , has stepped into this void I ’ ve felt .
Some of my favorite channels for creating “ ambience ” — soundscapes meant to replicate particular real-world experiences , usually with slightly animated visuals to match — have gone all out this holiday season , creating Christmas atmospheres that are lovely , festive , and aching reminders of the world that used to exist .
Particularly @ @ @ @ @ @ @ settings .
There are seemingly thousands of these ( though it ’ s probably only “ dozens ” ) , and they tend to feature the same elements .
There ’ s a coffee shop decorated for the holidays , steaming hot drinks on the tables .
There ’ s soft Christmas music ( and often a crackling fire ) .
There ’ s snow peacefully falling outside .
Here ’ s one specifically set at Starbucks .
A friend and I will sometimes gather on Zoom , pull up one of these @ @ @ @ @ @ @ about how we wish we were sitting in a very real coffee shop , talking face to face .
For now , this is a substitute .
What ’ s slightly eerie about these videos is the fact that none of them have any people , not even a bored barista behind the counter .
These are Christmas coffee shops devoid of humans ( though one of my favorites occasionally has someone walk by on the sidewalk outside ) .
Watching them , it really does feel like the world is waiting for @ @ @ @ @ @ @ as though these cheery holiday spaces are still out there somewhere , if only we could find them .
But that emptiness also makes it easier for my friend and me to project ourselves into those spaces .
If nobody else is here , maybe we can grab a cup of cider or hot cocoa and sit down together without worrying about everything worth worrying about right now .
It might be an idealized space , and it says something about 2020 that it ’ s easier to imagine an idealized coffee shop @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
YouTube is lousy with Christmas and winter soundscapes , which I turn to every year , because California Christmas will always be just a touch disappointing to a Midwestern girl raised on drifting snow .
I love this visit to a Christmas-y apartment in 1950s New York , this check-in at Santa ’ s office , and this peaceful mountain cabin in the middle of a blizzard .
Or consider this look at a Christmas party seen from outside of the house where it ’ s being held ( look at all @ @ @ @ @ @ @ you like to join them ? )
.
Or this Victorian Christmas storefront ?
I could go on .
The point is , we might feel unmoored in time right now , but the promise of finding this one tiny island where everything is the same and nothing has changed is intensely appealing .
I don ’ t know if there are so many Christmas coffee shops on YouTube this year because we ’ re all missing the trappings of the season or because those of us who spend time on YouTube ’ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ but those two hypotheses are kind of the same thing .
Christmas is best shared with other people .
We can ’ t do that right now , but until we can , we can at least pretend .
Ambience channels are all over YouTube .
Some of my favorites are Calmed by Nature , Autumn Cozy , and Ma Ambience .

This Christmas has felt different.
Normally I find myself eagerly anticipating the end of the year — I look forward to the presents, the well wishes from friends and strangers alike, the time off from work. It’s a chance to look back over the year that was and prepare for the year to come. The world changes, but this time of year, these remaining holidays, we try to keep as similar as possible. We like these little islands of time that change a bit more slowly than the rest of our lives.
In 2020, however, it’s harder to appreciate that island of time when time has ceased to have meaning. Each day blends into the next, and as I write this (on December 23), it’s hard to believe that Christmas is just two days away, even though looking at my calendar will tell me that it is. I still haven’t put up my tree. I’ll get to it when I get to it, maybe on December 27 or something.
Related Why time feels so weird right now
YouTube, as always, has stepped into this void I’ve felt. Some of my favorite channels for creating “ambience” — soundscapes meant to replicate particular real-world experiences, usually with slightly animated visuals to match — have gone all out this holiday season, creating Christmas atmospheres that are lovely, festive, and aching reminders of the world that used to exist.
Particularly popular are “Christmas coffee shop” settings. There are seemingly thousands of these (though it’s probably only “dozens”), and they tend to feature the same elements. There’s a coffee shop decorated for the holidays, steaming hot drinks on the tables. There’s soft Christmas music (and often a crackling fire). There’s snow peacefully falling outside. Here’s one specifically set at Starbucks.
A friend and I will sometimes gather on Zoom, pull up one of these videos on screen share, then talk about how we wish we were sitting in a very real coffee shop, talking face to face. For now, this is a substitute.
What’s slightly eerie about these videos is the fact that none of them have any people, not even a bored barista behind the counter. These are Christmas coffee shops devoid of humans (though one of my favorites occasionally has someone walk by on the sidewalk outside). Watching them, it really does feel like the world is waiting for us to come back to it, as though these cheery holiday spaces are still out there somewhere, if only we could find them.
But that emptiness also makes it easier for my friend and me to project ourselves into those spaces. If nobody else is here, maybe we can grab a cup of cider or hot cocoa and sit down together without worrying about everything worth worrying about right now. It might be an idealized space, and it says something about 2020 that it’s easier to imagine an idealized coffee shop as an empty one than ever before.
YouTube is lousy with Christmas and winter soundscapes, which I turn to every year, because California Christmas will always be just a touch disappointing to a Midwestern girl raised on drifting snow. I love this visit to a Christmas-y apartment in 1950s New York, this check-in at Santa’s office, and this peaceful mountain cabin in the middle of a blizzard. Or consider this look at a Christmas party seen from outside of the house where it’s being held (look at all those people inside; wouldn’t you like to join them?). Or this Victorian Christmas storefront? I could go on.
The point is, we might feel unmoored in time right now, but the promise of finding this one tiny island where everything is the same and nothing has changed is intensely appealing. I don’t know if there are so many Christmas coffee shops on YouTube this year because we’re all missing the trappings of the season or because those of us who spend time on YouTube’s ambience channels keep watching them, but those two hypotheses are kind of the same thing. Christmas is best shared with other people. We can’t do that right now, but until we can, we can at least pretend.
Ambience channels are all over YouTube. Some of my favorites are Calmed by Nature, Autumn Cozy, and Ma Ambience. For more recommendations from the world of culture, check out the One Good Thing archives.


vox--2020-12-26--Bridgerton has a rape scene, but it’s not treated like one

Bridgerton , Shonda Rimes ’ s first collaboration with Netflix , may be a sumptuous , scandal-laced frolic through Regency London .
But like many Shondaland series , it has plenty of dark and disturbing moments , and the show ’ s first season leaves us with more questions than answers .
Chief among them : Does the creative team realize how badly they handled the rape scene ?
Romance novelist Julia Quinn wrote the novel series on which Bridgerton is based , starting with The Duke and I in 2000 .
The first season , written by Shondaland veteran @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ’ s Anatomy ) , follows The Duke and I fairly closely — including one scene that ’ s central to the plot but that has been called out repeatedly by romance readers over the years as a rape .
In the two decades since the book ’ s release , much of society has become more aware of what is and isn ’ t consensual sex , and the show deliberately made changes to the scene to make it less explicitly nonconsensual .
That indicates to me that Van Dusen and his @ @ @ @ @ @ @ scene they were adapting .
But the version of this scene that ended up in the show is still nonconsensual , despite the tweaks .
And although it ’ s framed as a serious violation of trust between consenting parties , it passes without any explicit acknowledgment on the show ’ s part that what just occurred was a deeply disturbing violation of consent .
Bridgerton is thematically concerned with the dynamics of informed consent , which makes it even stranger that this scene was left unaddressed ; indeed , if there are @ @ @ @ @ @ @ the assault or their dynamic with their rapist , we don ’ t actually see them .
Because it happens pretty quickly and the narrative moves on immediately from the specifics of the sexual encounter itself , I ’ m not sure everyone will judge this scene in the same way I do .
But that ’ s why we should discuss it .
Our hero has a secret that sets the stage for everything Bridgerton is a historical romance set during London ’ s Regency era , a period of whirling 19th-century @ @ @ @ @ @ @ revolves around gorgeous debutante Daphne Bridgerton ( Phoebe Dynevor ) and the fake courtship she arranges during her debut on London ’ s “ marriage mart , ” the upper-class ritual of social functions that help eligible ladies and gentlemen make a match .
Despite coming from a powerful family and making a splash at her debut , Daphne is having trouble attracting suitors — so she bets ( correctly ) that faking a courtship with a very eligible duke will reignite the attention of other gentlemen .
Her choice of bachelor : @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ( Regé-Jean Page ) , a Black man whose family was recently elevated to the peerage .
Simon is trying to avoid matrimonial plots because he ’ s sworn off marriage , due to his solemn vow never to father children in order to let his entire family line , title and all , die with him .
It ’ s a promise he made in order to spite his abusive late father , who emotionally abused Simon all his life and cared more about his dukedom than anything else .
The relationship @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Simon , as it allows him to avoid seriously participating in the marriage mart .
But of course , in between bickering and pretending to be in love , the two fake lovebirds soon develop a very real romance .
Through an unlucky turn of events involving epic misunderstandings , secret love trysts , and a duel — y ’ know , the usual — the storyline scoots Daphne and Simon into a hastily arranged marriage .
This leads to lots and lots of sex scenes because they ’ re a hot couple @ @ @ @ @ @ @ But their newfound love also creates a whole new set of problems arising from Simon ’ s vow never to sire a family — a vow Daphne knows nothing about .
This subplot contributes to Bridgerton ’ s most interesting thematic idea , if one it ultimately squanders : the relationship between scandal , secrets , and informed consent .
The plot revolves around Simon ’ s choice not to tell Daphne that he has vowed not to have children .
Instead , he only tells her that he “ can ’ t @ @ @ @ @ @ @ from “ won ’ t. ” This deception places her in a doubly vulnerable position : Daphne ’ s in the dark about sex generally , as a woman who ’ s had no sexual education , and since she ’ s getting most of her tutelage from him directly , she has no way of knowing that he ’ s hiding things from her about his sexual health and practices .
Simon ’ s duplicity is , to some extent , unwitting — he doesn ’ t intend to trap Daphne into @ @ @ @ @ @ @ make marriage a necessity , he goes along with it , spinning a story that implies his inability to father children rather than tell her the truth .
The narrative treats the difference between “ can ’ t ” and “ won ’ t ” as a crucial distinction , one that fills Daphne with horror and bitterness when she realizes it .
It ’ s an interesting turn because Bridgerton frames Simon ’ s deceptive phrasing as deliberate , along with his choice to continue lying to her by omission .
This @ @ @ @ @ @ @ being unable to give informed consent , either to sex or to their entire relationship .
The problem is that she only figures this out by raping him .
Let me back up .
( Warning : This is about to get pretty graphic and gross . )
The rape scene is brief and disturbing , but it ’ s not treated as a rape Daphne knows nothing about sex when she gets married .
Her mother , too embarrassed to give her the specifics , sends her off to her marriage bed @ @ @ @ @ @ @ telling his new wife what ’ s up , Simon enjoys ravenous sex with Daphne but adopts the ol ’ tried-and-true contraceptive method of pulling out every time .
Eventually , Daphne figures out that there ’ s some connection between Simon never completing the act and his insistence that he can ’ t have children .
Determined to figure out whether he ’ s capable of it , she takes control during sex and positions herself on top of him so he can ’ t pull out .
When he realizes his @ @ @ @ @ @ @ alarmed and tries to stop — he cries out twice for Daphne to wait — but it ’ s too late .
Once she ’ s achieved her goal , she stops , and he processes what just happened in shock .
The strangest thing about this moment is that I ’ m not sure the show ’ s writers consider this scene to be a rape scene .
Daphne is immediately furious with Simon for lying to her , and the show then focuses on her betrayal and rage ; she even @ @ @ @ @ @ @ between “ won ’ t ” and “ can ’ t. ” It ’ s clearly intended to spell out the intricacies of informed consent , but none of Simon ’ s duplicity justifies the way Daphne pulls his secret — and , to be clear , his semen — out of him .
One bad moment of uninformed consent does not justify a moment of nonconsensual sex .
And depriving Simon of his consent to both sex and fatherhood , even at the moment of climax , is still rape .
If @ @ @ @ @ @ @ that Simon ’ s lie led to another similar violation of consent , that could have resulted in some really interesting narrative choices involving the two of them dealing with the fallout of both their betrayals and learning to communicate more clearly and carefully and sensitively .
But the show doesn ’ t dwell on Daphne ’ s choices , or on any long-term aftermath from that moment .
The incident doesn ’ t seem to impact Simon ’ s ability to trust Daphne in bed .
Instead , the show turns toward @ @ @ @ @ @ @ lying to her , dwelling on Simon ’ s need to win her forgiveness and give up his vow for the sake of their happiness .
I should note here that an even more nonconsensual version of this scene also occurs in the novel .
Quinn clearly wrote the scenario as a violation : “ Daphne had aroused him in his sleep , taken advantage of him while he was still slightly intoxicated , and held him to her while he poured his seed into her.
” Since the book was written , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ productive commentaries on the role of rape ( and tropes of dubious consent like “ forced seduction ” ) in romance fiction .
But according to Quinn herself in a reported recent exchange with romance vlogger BooksandKrys , the consent issues in that scene flew under the radar at the time The Duke and I was published .
“ Yes , it was shocking , but no one seemed to feel that Daphne had done anything morally wrong , ” she told BooksandKrys .
“ It was only as years passed and we @ @ @ @ @ @ @ that people started to question her actions.
” Quinn offered some perspective on the dynamics of rape as early as 2003 ; speaking then to Time , she commented , “ I can ’ t imagine a romance novel published today where the hero rapes the heroine and she falls in love with him ...
I can ’ t think of anything in my books that any feminist would find objectionable .
... And I consider myself a feminist.
” Yet by 2010 , the scene was being discussed among readers as an @ @ @ @ @ @ @ consent .
By 2015 , readers were dissecting the scene to point out its disturbing dynamics .
That the show ’ s creatives included this scene while making it less broadly , but still explicitly , nonconsensual , suggests they knew it needed fixing .
But it seems like they failed to see how badly they ultimately handled it .
Without signaling more effectively that Daphne ’ s choice was just as violating for Simon as his secrecy was for Daphne , Bridgerton undermines its entire experiment in exploring the boundaries of consent @ @ @ @ @ @ @ also undermines its central relationship , causing us to question the whole foundation of Daphne and Simon ’ s affection for each other .
Because Bridgerton doesn ’ t make an effort to depict Daphne ’ s rape of Simon as a huge issue that must be addressed for them to heal their marriage , we don ’ t really have much way of understanding whether their mutual trust is really fully repaired in the end .
And we ’ re given no assurance that she won ’ t violate his trust the @ @ @ @ @ @ @ lying to her .
It ’ s also frankly a giant gaslight ; even as I write this , I ’ m wondering if maybe I ’ m wrong and that the scene wasn ’ t rape — or if , perhaps , maybe this is the one time in history where somebody gets raped and it ’ s just not that big a deal , so it ’ s just kinda okay that the show glosses over it and moves on and Simon seems totally fine afterward .
Obviously , these are @ @ @ @ @ @ @ us with .
The dynamics of consent are complex and often frustrating and confusing , but one thing is almost universally certain : Rape is a big deal , and it often hugely impacts and alters both the rape survivor and the rapist .
For Bridgerton to ineffectively convey that Daphne raped Simon and then treat it like it was a minor side note to the much bigger issue of him lying to her makes it more difficult for audiences watching it to understand what consent looks like .
The fact that the @ @ @ @ @ @ @ a person of color makes it even more egregious that the show is glossing over the incident .
Men are often considered silent victims of sexual assault , and Black men in particular are often made scapegoats for sexual violence , which further erases the status of Black male victims of sexual assault .
In this context , the show ’ s emphasis on Simon as the instigator of Daphne ’ s choice basically paints him as being responsible for his own rape .
This aligns with the broader cultural gaslighting of Black @ @ @ @ @ @ @ from the white men and women who enact violence upon them .
Bridgerton has drawn its fair share of rave reviews as , among other things , “ delightful trash.
” As a huge , lifelong lover of the sorts of romance stories Bridgerton is adapting , what I hate most about this summation is that it implies that the ingredients of this story are a part of the inherent nature of the raunchy , racy historical romance .
Not only is that a condescending attitude toward a genre that is frequently very @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ’ s flatly wrong : Rape , especially unacknowledged rape , is by no means a feature of historical romance writing , nor was it going unaddressed and undebated back when Quinn wrote this story 20 years ago .
Countless romance writers have done better than this .
Bridgerton could and should have followed their example .

Bridgerton, Shonda Rhimes’s first collaboration with Netflix, may be a sumptuous, scandal-laced frolic through Regency London. But like many Shondaland series, it has plenty of dark and disturbing moments, and the show’s first season leaves us with more questions than answers. Chief among them: Does the creative team realize how badly they handled the rape scene?
Romance novelist Julia Quinn wrote the novel series on which Bridgerton is based, starting with The Duke and I in 2000. The first season, written by Shondaland veteran Chris Van Dusen (Scandal, Grey’s Anatomy), follows The Duke and I fairly closely — including one scene that’s central to the plot but that has been called out repeatedly by romance readers over the years as a rape.
In the two decades since the book’s release, much of society has become more aware of what is and isn’t consensual sex, and the show deliberately made changes to the scene to make it less explicitly nonconsensual. That indicates to me that Van Dusen and his fellow creatives knew the problems with the scene they were adapting. But the version of this scene that ended up in the show is still nonconsensual, despite the tweaks. And although it’s framed as a serious violation of trust between consenting parties, it passes without any explicit acknowledgment on the show’s part that what just occurred was a deeply disturbing violation of consent.
Bridgerton is thematically concerned with the dynamics of informed consent, which makes it even stranger that this scene was left unaddressed; indeed, if there are any lasting repercussions for the victim of the assault or their dynamic with their rapist, we don’t actually see them.
Because it happens pretty quickly and the narrative moves on immediately from the specifics of the sexual encounter itself, I’m not sure everyone will judge this scene in the same way I do. But that’s why we should discuss it.
Our hero has a secret that sets the stage for everything
Bridgerton is a historical romance set during London’s Regency era, a period of whirling 19th-century ballrooms and high-society intrigues. Our story revolves around gorgeous debutante Daphne Bridgerton (Phoebe Dynevor) and the fake courtship she arranges during her debut on London’s “marriage mart,” the upper-class ritual of social functions that helps eligible ladies and gentlemen make a match.
Despite coming from a powerful family and making a splash at her debut, Daphne is having trouble attracting suitors — so she bets (correctly) that faking a courtship with a very eligible duke will reignite the attention of other gentlemen. Her choice of bachelor: Simon, the hunky Duke of Hastings (Regé-Jean Page), a Black man whose family was recently elevated to the peerage. Simon is trying to avoid matrimonial plots because he’s sworn off marriage, due to his solemn vow never to father children in order to let his entire family line, title and all, die with him. It’s a promise he made in order to spite his abusive late father, who emotionally abused Simon all his life and cared more about his dukedom than anything else.
The relationship ruse is mutually beneficial for Daphne and Simon, as it allows him to avoid seriously participating in the marriage mart. But of course, in between bickering and pretending to be in love, the two fake lovebirds soon develop a very real romance. Through an unlucky turn of events involving epic misunderstandings, secret love trysts, and a duel — y’know, the usual — the storyline scoots Daphne and Simon into a hastily arranged marriage. This leads to lots and lots of sex scenes because they’re a hot couple who are hot for each other. But their newfound love also creates a whole new set of problems arising from Simon’s vow never to sire a family — a vow Daphne knows nothing about.
This subplot contributes to Bridgerton’s most interesting thematic idea, if one it ultimately squanders: the relationship between scandal, secrets, and informed consent. The plot revolves around Simon’s choice not to tell Daphne that he has vowed not to have children. Instead, he only tells her that he “can’t” have children, a clear difference from “won’t.” This deception places her in a doubly vulnerable position: Daphne’s in the dark about sex generally, as a woman who’s had no sexual education, and since she’s getting most of her tutelage from him directly, she has no way of knowing that he’s hiding things from her about his sexual health and practices.
Simon’s duplicity is, to some extent, unwitting — he doesn’t intend to trap Daphne into marriage, but when events conspire to make marriage a necessity, he goes along with it, spinning a story that implies his inability to father children rather than tell her the truth. The narrative treats the difference between “can’t” and “won’t” as a crucial distinction, one that fills Daphne with horror and bitterness when she realizes it. It’s an interesting turn because Bridgerton frames Simon’s deceptive phrasing as deliberate, along with his choice to continue lying to her by omission. This deception placed Daphne in the position of being unable to give informed consent, either to sex or to their entire relationship.
The problem is that she only figures this out by raping him.
Let me back up. (Warning: This is about to get pretty graphic and gross.)
The rape scene is brief and disturbing, but it’s not treated as a rape
Daphne knows nothing about sex when she gets married. Her mother, too embarrassed to give her the specifics, sends her off to her marriage bed completely unprepared. Meanwhile, instead of telling his new wife what’s up, Simon enjoys ravenous sex with Daphne but adopts the ol’ tried-and-true contraceptive method of pulling out every time. Eventually, Daphne figures out that there’s some connection between Simon never completing the act and his insistence that he can’t have children. Determined to figure out whether he’s capable of it, she takes control during sex and positions herself on top of him so he can’t pull out.
When he realizes his predicament right before orgasm, Simon looks alarmed and tries to stop — he cries out twice for Daphne to wait — but it’s too late. Once she’s achieved her goal, she stops, and he processes what just happened in shock.
The strangest thing about this moment is that I’m not sure the show’s writers consider this scene to be a rape scene. Daphne is immediately furious with Simon for lying to her, and the show then focuses on her betrayal and rage; she even has a semantic speech about the difference between “won’t” and “can’t.” It’s clearly intended to spell out the intricacies of informed consent, but none of Simon’s duplicity justifies the way Daphne pulls his secret — and, to be clear, his semen — out of him. One bad moment of uninformed consent does not justify a moment of nonconsensual sex. And depriving Simon of his consent to both sex and fatherhood, even at the moment of climax, is still rape.
If the show had really explored the idea that Simon’s lie led to another similar violation of consent, that could have resulted in some really interesting narrative choices involving the two of them dealing with the fallout of both their betrayals and learning to communicate more clearly and carefully and sensitively.
But the show doesn’t dwell on Daphne’s choices, or on any long-term aftermath from that moment. The incident doesn’t seem to impact Simon’s ability to trust Daphne in bed. Instead, the show turns toward Daphne’s distrust of him for lying to her, dwelling on Simon’s need to win her forgiveness and give up his vow for the sake of their happiness.
I should note here that an even more nonconsensual version of this scene also occurs in the novel. Quinn clearly wrote the scenario as a violation: “Daphne had aroused him in his sleep, taken advantage of him while he was still slightly intoxicated, and held him to her while he poured his seed into her.”
Since the book was written, countless romance writers and readers have inserted productive commentaries on the role of rape (and tropes of dubious consent like “forced seduction”) in romance fiction. But according to Quinn herself in a reported recent exchange with romance vlogger BooksandKrys, the consent issues in that scene flew under the radar at the time The Duke and I was published. “Yes, it was shocking, but no one seemed to feel that Daphne had done anything morally wrong,” she told BooksandKrys. “It was only as years passed and we gained new understanding of ‘consent’ that people started to question her actions.”
Quinn offered some perspective on the dynamics of rape as early as 2003; speaking then to Time, she commented, “I can’t imagine a romance novel published today where the hero rapes the heroine and she falls in love with him ... I can’t think of anything in my books that any feminist would find objectionable. ... And I consider myself a feminist.”
Yet by 2010, the scene was being discussed among readers as an example of sexual assault and lack of consent. By 2015, readers were dissecting the scene to point out its disturbing dynamics.
That the show’s creatives included this scene while making it less broadly, but still explicitly, nonconsensual, suggests they knew it needed fixing. But it seems like they failed to see how badly they ultimately handled it. Without signaling more effectively that Daphne’s choice was just as violating for Simon as his secrecy was for Daphne, Bridgerton undermines its entire experiment in exploring the boundaries of consent.
Through this moment, the show also undermines its central relationship, causing us to question the whole foundation of Daphne and Simon’s affection for each other. Because Bridgerton doesn’t make an effort to depict Daphne’s rape of Simon as a huge issue that must be addressed for them to heal their marriage, we don’t have much way to understand whether their mutual trust is really fully repaired in the end. And we’re given no assurance that she won’t violate his trust the next time she decides he might be lying to her.
It’s also frankly a giant gaslight; even as I write this, I’m wondering if maybe I’m wrong and that the scene wasn’t rape — or if, perhaps, maybe this is the one time in history where somebody gets raped and it’s just not that big a deal, so it’s just kinda okay that the show glosses over it and moves on and Simon seems totally fine afterward.
Obviously, these are horrible takeaways for a show to leave us with. The dynamics of consent are complex and often frustrating and confusing, but one thing is almost universally certain: Rape is a big deal, and it often hugely impacts and alters both the rape survivor and the rapist. For Bridgerton to ineffectively convey that Daphne raped Simon and then treat it like it was a minor side note to the much bigger issue of him lying to her makes it more difficult for audiences watching it to understand what consent looks like.
The fact that the rape victim here is both male and a person of color makes it even more egregious that the show is glossing over the incident. Men are often considered silent victims of sexual assault, and Black men in particular are often made scapegoats for sexual violence, which further erases the status of Black male victims of sexual assault. In this context, the show’s emphasis on Simon as the instigator of Daphne’s choice basically paints him as being responsible for his own rape. This aligns with the broader cultural gaslighting of Black men and the shifting of blame away from the white men and women who enact violence upon them.
Bridgerton has drawn its fair share of rave reviews as, among other things, “delightful trash.” As a huge, lifelong lover of the sorts of romance stories Bridgerton is adapting, what I hate most about this summation is that it implies that the ingredients of this story are a part of the inherent nature of the raunchy, racy historical romance. Not only is that a condescending attitude toward a genre that is frequently very literary and very serious, but it’s flatly wrong: Rape, especially unacknowledged rape, is by no means a feature of historical romance writing, nor was it going unaddressed and undebated back when Quinn wrote this story 20 years ago. Countless romance writers have done better than this. Bridgerton could and should have followed their example.


vox--2020-12-27--The Lost Year: Chronic pain, an unusual love story, and reassurance via pickle

This is The Lost Year , a series of stories about our lived experiences in 2020 , as told to Vox critic at large Emily VanDerWerff .
Before Covid-19 hit , Honey rarely left the house .
Much of their work as an artist and photographer could happen within their home , and they were used to spending a lot of time alone .
Chronic physical and mental conditions made staying at home a strong preference .
But that hasn ’ t been true in the midst of the pandemic .
In the past nine months , Honey has taken @ @ @ @ @ @ @ a delivery driver and gotten married ( to someone they met during the pandemic ) .
I ’ m fascinated by the ways so many of our worlds have shrunk over this period , but Honey ’ s has actually expanded , to encompass both a spouse and a new job that takes them out on the road a few days a week .
I ’ m also fascinated by Honey ’ s story of managing a chronic pain condition in the midst of a pandemic , especially when so many of their @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Their solution for making sure they ’ re “ just ” suffering from chronic pain and not the virus is clever .
Throughout our chat , I was blown away by Honey ’ s observations on a world in isolation , a world that resembles the one they ’ ve lived in for most of their life .
Here ’ s Honey ’ s story , as told to me .
Before the pandemic , I did a lot of film photography .
I was creating all the time .
Now , I @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
I ’ ve been doing a lot of collage work .
I ’ ve been doing sewing and embroidery and stuff .
Some people have hired me to do paid photo shoots , and I always tell them I ’ m going to wear a mask and shoot with my close lens , so I can be far away from them .
But I do them .
Money ’ s money .
Honestly , changing art forms has been really good for me .
I don ’ t think I would have @ @ @ @ @ @ @ pandemic ] .
I wouldn ’ t have been able to discover all the things that I can do .
My quarantine experience probably hasn ’ t been like other people ’ s .
Before the pandemic , I didn ’ t go to parties or anything , and I just left [ the house ] for things like grocery shopping .
I have some mental health conditions , like autism , ADHD , and PTSD , but I also have physical health struggles , like endometriosis and arthritis .
Those are definitely @ @ @ @ @ @ @ are certain ways — and maybe it ’ s not cool to say this — in which quarantine has been helpful .
When I used to tell people , “ Oh , I can ’ t hang out , ” it was much harder to get them to understand why .
And now it ’ s like , “ Oh , there ’ s a pandemic .
I can ’ t come.
” And a lot of jobs beforehand were not at all accommodating , or they didn ’ t have a lot @ @ @ @ @ @ @ if I say that I ’ m sick and I can ’ t come in , they ’ ll say , “ Oh , my gosh , stay home !
” I even got a job as a delivery driver with the post office .
So it ’ s interesting — I ’ m definitely leaving my house more [ than I did before the pandemic ] , but I ’ m leaving my house to be alone in a car by myself , which is the ideal situation .
I live in @ @ @ @ @ @ @ area [ where I live ] , we shut down for maybe two weeks max .
It was so quiet and weird .
And a lot of people were home when I would deliver , which I wouldn ’ t like .
But what was really weird was that very shortly after that , everything was back to normal .
Everybody was out , like the pandemic didn ’ t exist .
No one was wearing masks .
The times when I ’ m in the building , loading my packages in my @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
Some of my coworkers do , but most of them absolutely do not wear their masks .
And it ’ s so stressful to me .
I want to say something .
I ’ m scared to say something .
I think many white people will always see inconvenience as oppression .
And it ’ s not even that much of an inconvenience !
They just hate that they have to do what everybody else is doing .
They have this obsession with hyper-individualization that carries through not only to wearing a @ @ @ @ @ @ @ America also means that you ’ re responsible for your own health .
It ’ s your fault if you get sick .
It ’ s not my fault for not wearing a mask .
You got sick , and that ’ s on you .
I grew up in a very isolated setting , and that prepared me for a lot [ of this experience ] .
My parents had seven kids , and we pretty much didn ’ t interact with anyone outside our family .
It was complete lockdown .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ read unapproved books .
So most of the relationships I formed in my life , I ’ ve formed over the internet .
I feel like this pandemic has been less challenging for people who grew up in specifically traumatizing households and people who have certain mental illnesses .
For us , it ’ s often normal to conduct all our relationships over the internet .
And some neurotypical people and people who love going out to meet people are having a lot of trouble adjusting .
I ’ m living with my @ @ @ @ @ @ @ been semi on my own since I was 17 , but I never had my own space .
And now I have my own space .
I get to control the experiences I have .
I ’ m just starting with movies and TV and books .
There ’ s no end to the entertainment and the new things I can discover .
I just watched an anime called Fruits Basket .
It ’ s really gay , and it ’ s awesome .
I met my wife at the start of the @ @ @ @ @ @ @ them at the perfect time .
I was learning a lot of important things on how to be independent , and they , as a person , are extremely independent .
We ’ re around each other , because we enjoy each other ’ s company , but whenever we need our own space , we just take our own space .
There ’ s a mutual understanding and a flow to it .
It helped to almost approach the marriage like a business arrangement and not put pressure and stress on it @ @ @ @ @ @ @ progressed very naturally , and it ’ s easy to be in a relationship with them .
Neither of us really believes in marriage , but they are ex-military , and they have health benefits and a retirement fund .
I really needed surgery at the time , and it worked out , because we like each other .
We met , and we saw each other every day since the first time we met up , and then we got married .
It ’ s been good .
It ’ s been @ @ @ @ @ @ @ sure to take precautions .
If we mutually agree that we don ’ t want to be together in a romantic or sexual way , we have everything planned out for that .
We ’ re not stupid .
The pandemic has exacerbated certain struggles we have .
But because we have different things to manage , there is a balance .
I ’ m able to be there for them , and they ’ re able to be there for me .
The issues that affect me the most right now are @ @ @ @ @ @ @ affected by their mental issues .
So they ’ re able to help me with physical things , and I can help them with mental things .
Everything that I deal with — chronic pain , nausea , having trouble moving — mimics the symptoms of Covid-19 .
And every couple of weeks , I ’ ll have a freakout and be like , “ Oh , my god , what if I have it.
” But the one symptom I don ’ t get with my chronic illnesses is a loss of @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ’ m experiencing symptoms , I can easily spiral .
“ What if the hospital is full ?
What if the bill is so expensive we can ’ t pay it ?
” Just freaking out .
So now whenever I start freaking out , I just go eat a pickle or something to calm myself down and reassure myself .
But it took me a lot of months to get there !
One of the biggest struggles has been that both of us are learning we don ’ t have to hide @ @ @ @ @ @ @ s difficult , because we both grew up in environments where we had to hide things , just from us being queer and growing up in very homophobic families .
At the beginning , it almost helped with the honesty [ between us ] being thrust immediately into a situation where we can take our own space if we want , but because of the pandemic , we are like , “ Okay , you ’ re the only person that I ’ m going to see now.
” Knowing we have [ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ in a house together helps with two things .
First , [ we have that plan ] , so I don ’ t have to be afraid to bring things up to my partner .
And second , we are kind of stuck here , so to speak , so me keeping things to myself is stupid and childish .
It ’ s just better to talk it out .
Next : A new baby who didn ’ t know your face for days because you were always wearing a mask

This is The Lost Year, a series of stories about our lived experiences in 2020, as told to Vox critic at large Emily VanDerWerff.
Before Covid-19 hit, Honey rarely left the house. Much of their work as an artist and photographer could happen within their home, and they were used to spending a lot of time alone. Chronic physical and mental conditions made staying at home a strong preference.
But that hasn’t been true in the midst of the pandemic. In the past nine months, Honey has taken a job with the post office as a delivery driver and gotten married (to someone they met during the pandemic). I’m fascinated by the ways so many of our worlds have shrunk over this period, but Honey’s has actually expanded, to encompass both a spouse and a new job that takes them out on the road a few days a week.
I’m also fascinated by Honey’s story of managing a chronic pain condition in the midst of a pandemic, especially when so many of their symptoms present similarly to Covid-19 symptoms. Their solution for making sure they’re “just” suffering from chronic pain and not the virus is clever. Throughout our chat, I was blown away by Honey’s observations on a world in isolation, a world that resembles the one they’ve lived in for most of their life.
Here’s Honey’s story, as told to me.
Before the pandemic, I did a lot of film photography. I was creating all the time. Now, I shifted gears and got into other formats. I’ve been doing a lot of collage work. I’ve been doing sewing and embroidery and stuff. Some people have hired me to do paid photo shoots, and I always tell them I’m going to wear a mask and shoot with my close lens, so I can be far away from them. But I do them. Money’s money.
Honestly, changing art forms has been really good for me. I don’t think I would have done it [if not for the pandemic]. I wouldn’t have been able to discover all the things that I can do.
My quarantine experience probably hasn’t been like other people’s. Before the pandemic, I didn’t go to parties or anything, and I just left [the house] for things like grocery shopping. I have some mental health conditions, like autism, ADHD, and PTSD, but I also have physical health struggles, like endometriosis and arthritis. Those are definitely a challenge.
If anything, there are certain ways — and maybe it’s not cool to say this — in which quarantine has been helpful. When I used to tell people, “Oh, I can’t hang out,” it was much harder to get them to understand why. And now it’s like, “Oh, there’s a pandemic. I can’t come.” And a lot of jobs beforehand were not at all accommodating, or they didn’t have a lot of infrastructure for that. And now if I say that I’m sick and I can’t come in, they’ll say, “Oh, my gosh, stay home!”
I even got a job as a delivery driver with the post office. So it’s interesting — I’m definitely leaving my house more [than I did before the pandemic], but I’m leaving my house to be alone in a car by myself, which is the ideal situation.
I live in South Carolina, and in the upstate area [where I live], we shut down for maybe two weeks max. It was so quiet and weird. And a lot of people were home when I would deliver, which I wouldn’t like. But what was really weird was that very shortly after that, everything was back to normal. Everybody was out, like the pandemic didn’t exist. No one was wearing masks. The times when I’m in the building, loading my packages in my truck, I have my mask on. Some of my coworkers do, but most of them absolutely do not wear their masks. And it’s so stressful to me. I want to say something. I’m scared to say something.
I think many white people will always see inconvenience as oppression. And it’s not even that much of an inconvenience! They just hate that they have to do what everybody else is doing. They have this obsession with hyper-individualization that carries through not only to wearing a mask like everybody else; hyper-individualization in America also means that you’re responsible for your own health. It’s your fault if you get sick. It’s not my fault for not wearing a mask. You got sick, and that’s on you.
I grew up in a very isolated setting, and that prepared me for a lot [of this experience]. My parents had seven kids, and we pretty much didn’t interact with anyone outside our family. It was complete lockdown. I couldn’t watch TV or read unapproved books. So most of the relationships I formed in my life, I’ve formed over the internet.
I feel like this pandemic has been less challenging for people who grew up in specifically traumatizing households and people who have certain mental illnesses. For us, it’s often normal to conduct all our relationships over the internet. And some neurotypical people and people who love going out to meet people are having a lot of trouble adjusting.
I’m living with my wife now, and I’ve been semi on my own since I was 17, but I never had my own space. And now I have my own space. I get to control the experiences I have. I’m just starting with movies and TV and books. There’s no end to the entertainment and the new things I can discover. I just watched an anime called Fruits Basket. It’s really gay, and it’s awesome.
I met my wife at the start of the pandemic, on Tinder. I met them at the perfect time. I was learning a lot of important things on how to be independent, and they, as a person, are extremely independent. We’re around each other, because we enjoy each other’s company, but whenever we need our own space, we just take our own space. There’s a mutual understanding and a flow to it. It helped to almost approach the marriage like a business arrangement and not put pressure and stress on it and see where things went. It progressed very naturally, and it’s easy to be in a relationship with them.
Neither of us really believes in marriage, but they are ex-military, and they have health benefits and a retirement fund. I really needed surgery at the time, and it worked out, because we like each other. We met, and we saw each other every day since the first time we met up, and then we got married.
It’s been good. It’s been pretty easy. We’ve made sure to take precautions. If we mutually agree that we don’t want to be together in a romantic or sexual way, we have everything planned out for that. We’re not stupid.
The pandemic has exacerbated certain struggles we have. But because we have different things to manage, there is a balance. I’m able to be there for them, and they’re able to be there for me. The issues that affect me the most right now are my physical issues, and they are affected by their mental issues. So they’re able to help me with physical things, and I can help them with mental things.
Everything that I deal with — chronic pain, nausea, having trouble moving — mimics the symptoms of Covid-19. And every couple of weeks, I’ll have a freakout and be like, “Oh, my god, what if I have it.” But the one symptom I don’t get with my chronic illnesses is a loss of taste or smell. So if I’m experiencing symptoms, I can easily spiral. “What if the hospital is full? What if the bill is so expensive we can’t pay it?” Just freaking out. So now whenever I start freaking out, I just go eat a pickle or something to calm myself down and reassure myself. But it took me a lot of months to get there!
One of the biggest struggles has been that both of us are learning we don’t have to hide things from each other. It’s difficult, because we both grew up in environments where we had to hide things, just from us being queer and growing up in very homophobic families. At the beginning, it almost helped with the honesty [between us] being thrust immediately into a situation where we can take our own space if we want, but because of the pandemic, we are like, “Okay, you’re the only person that I’m going to see now.”
Knowing we have [a plan] but also being stuck in a house together helps with two things. First, [we have that plan], so I don’t have to be afraid to bring things up to my partner. And second, we are kind of stuck here, so to speak, so me keeping things to myself is stupid and childish. It’s just better to talk it out.
Next: A new baby who didn’t know your face for days because you were always wearing a mask