thepoke--2020-11-24--This ‘honest dating advice’ went viral because people loved it so much

It ’ s not as easy to go on a date as it once was ( at least , not if it doesn ’ t involve Zoom ) but when things get back to normal this might come in very handy indeed .
It ’ s some ‘ honest dating advice ’ that proved very popular on Reddit because it ’ s so true and had lots of people saying either ‘ This will come in useful … ’ or ‘ I wish I ’ d know when … ’ Anyway , that ’ s enough from us , have @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Redditor vegankennedy .
And just some of the things people said about it .
‘ I like the friendship point .
The base for a good relationship is always friendship You wouldn ’ t spend your life with someone you don ’ t like.
’ Bluepompf ‘ Ugh , I ’ m happily married but I wish I saw this guide in my early 20 ’ s .
More single life and time to myself would not have hurt.
’ Garaquarubyline ‘ I feel like # 2 needs to be told to people @ @ @ @ @ @ @ time.
’ haysoos2 And according to the small print , you can find more of this sort of thing at werenotreallystrangers.com and on Instagram here .
We ’ ll never tire of this dog playing ‘ fetch ’ with the darts players on TV Source Reddit u/vegankennedy

Pics
People aren’t going out on dates as much as they once were for reasons we don’t need to go into here, but when things get back to normal this might come in very handy indeed.
It’s some ‘honest dating advice’ that proved very popular on Reddit because it’s so true and had lots of people saying either ‘This will come in useful …’ or ‘I wish I’d know when …’
Anyway, that’s enough from us, have a read of these top tips shared by Redditor vegankennedy.
Here it is again just in case that’s tricky to read.
1. Worry less about if they like you and more about if you even like them. 2. Rejection is not as personal as it feels. Liking someone or being liked is much more about compatibility than inherent worth 3. Stop choosing what isn’t choosing you. If it’s not mutual, why pursue it? 4. Ask yourself: Would you be friends with this person if you weren’t physically attracted to them? Be honest 5. Get clear on what you want to give in a relationship, not just what you want to receive. What unique value you bring to a partnership? 6. Know what you want form a potential partner. What are your non-negotiables? What are you flexible on? Then communicate your needs, don’t just think them. 7. Stop being shocked by repeated behaviour. For example, if someone has continuously shown you they aren’t a good texter, stop expecting them to be. Notice patterns and believe them. 8. You don’t need to be perfect to be loved. ‘Perfection’ isn’t relatable. You can’t connect to it. We all have flaws and vulnerabilities, and being able to own them is one of the most attractive things we can do. The right person will embrace the things you once felt you had to hide. 9. Your love life is one area of your life. Don’t forget to nurture the rest. Significant other aside, when you visualise coming home to a life you love, what does that look like? Get specific.
And just some of the things people said about it.
‘I like the friendship point. The base for a good relationship is always friendship You wouldn’t spend your life with someone you don’t like.’ Bluepompf ‘Ugh, I’m happily married but I wish I saw this guide in my early 20’s. More single life and time to myself would not have hurt.’ Garaquarubyline ‘I feel like #2 needs to be told to people more often, everywhere, all the time.’ haysoos2 ‘Thank you…. I really needed this today.’ -businessskeleton-
The advice originally came from werenotreallystangers.com and you can find more of this sort of thing at werenotreallystrangers.com and on Instagram here.
READ MORE
We’ll never tire of this dog playing ‘fetch’ with the darts players on TV
Source Reddit u/vegankennedy werenotreallystrangers.com


thepoke--2020-11-24--An unexplained monolith has appeared in Utah, because of course it has  – 9 perfect reactions

If you had a metallic monolith mysteriously appearing in the deserts of Utah on your 2020 bingo card then you @ @ @ @ @ to check off .
According to CNN , the 2001 : A Space Odyssey-esque object @ @ @ @ @ the Utah Department of Public Safety as they were flying overhead .
“ We were @ @ @ @ @ if one of us suddenly disappears , then the rest of us make a run @ @ @ @ @ of the officers said .
The working theory is that it ’ s an art @ @ @ @ @ , but with it being 2020 , we ’ d rather not take our chances @ @ @ @ @ 9 reactions you need : Pythagoras didn ’ t just do triangles , he also @ @ @ @ @ that ’ s gone viral 2,500 years later

Pics
If you had a metallic monolith mysteriously appearing in the deserts of Utah on your 2020 bingo card then you’ve got another square to check off.
According to CNN, the 2001: A Space Odyssey-esque object was spotted by officers from the Utah Department of Public Safety as they were flying overhead. “We were kind of joking around that if one of us suddenly disappears, then the rest of us make a run for it,” one of the officers said.
Officers from the Utah Department of Public Safety's Aero Bureau were flying by helicopter last Wednesday, helping the Division of Wildlife Resources count bighorn sheep, when they spotted a shiny, silver metal monolith sticking out of the ground https://t.co/v3Ny7QWDQo — CNN (@CNN) November 24, 2020
The working theory is that it’s an art installation by a local artist, but with it being 2020, we’d rather not take our chances.
These are the only 9 reactions you need:
1.
2.
3.
https://twitter.com/tainkirrahe/status/1331166580563128321
4.
GOT A LOT GOIN ON RIGHT NOW WHAT WITH THE PLAGUE AND THE NAZIS AND THE HORNETS DON’T NEED A MONOLITH TO PUZZLE OUT THANKS THOUGH — kilgore trout, four seasons appreciator (@KT_So_It_Goes) November 24, 2020
5.
"Helicopter pilot finds 'strange' monolith in remote part of Utah" – The Guardian Yeah, this is the year. Go mess with it. Kick it around a bit. Play that audio made with the 3-D printed voice box of that Egyptian priest. It's time to end this, and this is how it starts… — Gabino Iglesias (@Gabino_Iglesias) November 23, 2020
6.
new monolith dropped https://t.co/fwnlFR9RwN — Andrew Lawrence (@ndrew_lawrence) November 24, 2020
7.
Well now I need to go worship a mysterious monolith in Utah for some reason… — Stephen leitch (@stephenleitch) November 23, 2020
8.
The really strange thing about that Utah monolith story is that it was discovered while they were counting sheep from a helicopter. Aren’t they worried about falling asleep and dropping out of the sky doing that??? — AP Strange (@AProdigiosus) November 22, 2020
9.
https://twitter.com/youwouldknow/status/1331149142907871233
READ MORE
Pythagoras didn’t just do triangles, he also did this joke self-draining cup that’s gone viral 2,500 years later
Source: @CNN / Utah Department of Public Safety


thepoke--2020-11-24--This Fox News anchor admitting the ‘reality’ of Donald Trump’s defeat is a fabulously satisfying wat

This Fox News anchor admitting the ‘reality’ of Donald Trump’s defeat is a fabulously satisfying watch

There ’ s been no shortage of memorable moments during the long , drawn out process that has been the @ @ @ @ @ And this is right up there with the best , the supremely satisfying moment when @ @ @ @ @ admitted to her devastated , furious audience that the White House transition to a Joe @ @ @ @ @ Heartbreaking stuff .
And just some of the things people said about it after the @ @ @ @ @ But some Trump supporters still weren ’ t buying it .

Videos
There’s been no shortage of memorable moments during the long, drawn out process that has been the US presidential election 2020.
And this is right up there with the best, the supremely satisfying moment when Fox News anchor Laura Ingraham admitted to her devastated, furious audience that the White House transition to a Joe Biden presidency had begun.
Laura Ingraham breaks the news to her audience: If I told you there was an excellent phenomenal chance that the Supreme Court was going to step in and deliver a victory to President Trump, I’d be lying to you pic.twitter.com/F2CFgACBmd — Acyn Torabi (@Acyn) November 24, 2020
Heartbreaking stuff. And just some of the things people said about it after the clip went wildly viral.
WHOA… Laura Ingraham is breaking it to MAGA that because of reality, Joe Biden WILL be their President. This is delicious. https://t.co/PSBBnAULo4 — BrooklynDad_Defiant! (@mmpadellan) November 24, 2020
Laura Ingraham tries to break it to MAGA Ville that Mayor McPumpkin lost and that ain’t changing. Worth the watch just for the comical absurdity of having to treat viewers like they’re kids who still believe in the tooth fairy. https://t.co/9ryujviOrS — The Hoarse Whisperer (@TheRealHoarse) November 24, 2020
https://twitter.com/MollyJongFast/status/1331077065475493894?s=20
I’m going to watch this on repeat for a while …. pic.twitter.com/NNE3ke9Oby — Bradley P. Moss (@BradMossEsq) November 24, 2020
Fox News host Laura Ingraham just gave her own concession speech: "Unless the legal situation changes in dramatic and frankly an unlikely manner, Joe Biden will be inaugurated on January 20th." — Palmer Report (@PalmerReport) November 24, 2020
But some Trump supporters still weren’t buying it.
@IngrahamAngle threw in the towel. As for me, I stand with @realDonaldTrump. We are on the world stage. The theft of an American election will signal a level of moral corruption in this country that will invite our destruction. It cannot be allowed. #stopthesteal — Brian T. Kennedy (@BrianTKennedy1) November 24, 2020
READ MORE
This Donald Trump press conference takes a hilariously unexpected turn
Source Twitter @Acyn


thepoke--2020-11-24--Trump thinks his lawyers are making him look bad – the only 5 truth bombs you need to read

In spite of naming her among his lawyers just last week , Trump and his team have now distanced themselves @ @ @ @ @ made claims that Joe Biden had won due to Communist funding and that the voting @ @ @ @ @ to Biden ones .
It ’ s quite something when Rudy Giuliani – who booked @ @ @ @ @ of the Four Seasons Hotel , shortly before giving a press conference with melted hair @ @ @ @ @ – thinks you ’ re a liability to the team ’ s credibility .
However @ @ @ @ @ President ’ s fears , as reported by CNBC , are probably a little unfair @ @ @ @ @ five responses sum up the problems with Trump ’ s complaint .
Oscar Nunez pulled @ @ @ @ @ .
Danny Wallace had these words of comfort .
That can go on his CV @ @ @ @ @ Trump tweeted about starting the Biden transition and the takedowns were epic – our 14 @

Twitter
In spite of naming her among his lawyers just last week, Trump and his team have now distanced themselves from Sidney Powell, who made claims that Joe Biden had won due to Communist funding and that the voting machines had changed Trump votes to Biden ones.
It’s quite something when Rudy Giuliani – who booked Four Seasons Total landscaping instead of the Four Seasons Hotel, shortly before giving a press conference with melted hair dye running down his face – thinks you’re a liability to the team’s credibility.
However, we feel that the President’s fears, as reported by CNBC, are probably a little unfair on the lawyers.
President Trump is worried that his campaign’s legal team, which is being led by his personal lawyer Rudy Giuliani, is comprised of “fools that are making him look bad,” @NBCNews reports. https://t.co/Cc2hDTzAMT — CNBC (@CNBC) November 23, 2020
These five responses sum up the problems with Trump’s complaint.
1.
I wonder what makes him FOUR SEASONS TOTAL think that? https://t.co/IrZ0d6txFB — John Rain (@MrKenShabby) November 23, 2020
2.
Nothing fucking gets past him eh? https://t.co/jFMtQ8Jf6t — Malcolm Tucker Esq 🕷 (@Tucker5law) November 23, 2020
3.
President Trump is worried that the guy who stares back at him in the bathroom mirror is a fool who's making him look bad. https://t.co/XW9sJk0vvK — Stephen McGann (@StephenMcGann) November 23, 2020
4.
5.
Actually, I believe they’re an excellent representation of Trump on the legal stage. Very accurate and believable. — Andrew C Laufer, Esq (@lauferlaw) November 23, 2020
Oscar Nunez pulled no punches in his assessment.
When President Trump steps in shit. The piece of shit wipes Trump off itself. Point being, nothing can make him look worse than what he is. https://t.co/hacjb0ryN0 — Oscar Nunez (@OscarNunezLA) November 23, 2020
Danny Wallace had these words of comfort.
No mate! It's going well! Stick with it. https://t.co/XZNgdXXSS5 — Danny Wallace (@dannywallace) November 23, 2020
That can go on his CV for the job search.
READ MORE
Trump tweeted about starting the Biden transition and the takedowns were epic – our 14 favourites
Source CNBC Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-11-24--“Everyone needs to see this squirrel that’s off its tits drunk on fermented pears”

This squirrel appears to be living its best life , as the pears on which it ’ s happily munching @ @ @ @ @ alcohol .
If “ see a pissed squirrel ” was on your bucket list , @ @ @ @ @ bad boy off .
It seems our furry friend was pretty relatable .
You know @ @ @ @ @ are two kinds of people in this world.
” … With that in mind – @ @ @ @ @ kind of squirrel .
A flea from a squirrel bit Johnny Rotten right on his @ @ @ @ @ funniest responses

Videos
This squirrel appears to be living its best life, as the pears on which it’s happily munching have fermented – turning into alcohol.
Everyone needs to see this squirrel that’s off it’s tits drunk on fermented pears pic.twitter.com/P2JJ60ml0Z — Taffin (@i124nk8) November 21, 2020
If “see a pissed squirrel” was on your bucket list, then you can tick that bad boy off.
It seems our furry friend was pretty relatable.
me in the club bathroom calculating which shot should’ve been the last😭 https://t.co/eGayP8Ixjg — kitten (@__KENTE__) November 22, 2020
Funny; I always used to feel as though I was falling back over my left shoulder as well… https://t.co/3OTGi9sknH — Chris Garland Training: Your Training Partner (@GarlandTraining) November 22, 2020
Take his car keys… https://t.co/vszIDhRZFg — Brian Knutson (@knutson_brain) November 22, 2020
Oh man, have I been there https://t.co/g0CkAMPbiU — B. Dave Walters: Revolutionary Content Creator (@BDaveWalters) November 23, 2020
You know how they say “There are two kinds of people in this world.” …
There are two types of squirrel:
Some solve complicated puzzle assault courses for a nut
Others just get shit-faced — Taffin (@i124nk8) November 23, 2020
With that in mind – here’s the other kind of squirrel.
READ MORE
A flea from a squirrel bit Johnny Rotten right on his Sex Pistol – the 9 funniest responses
Source Taffin Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-11-24--Boris Johnson’s video link to the Commons falling mute was peak 2020 – the 8 funniest responses

With England ’ s lockdown set to end in just over a week , Boris Johnson addressed the House of @ @ @ @ @ forward .
We discovered that the three tiers of rules would be made more restrictive @ @ @ @ @ be uniform across the country – so no special arrangements for any areas .
Limited @ @ @ @ @ into sports stadia in the lower tiers , and arts performances can take place indoors @ @ @ @ @ .
We also learnt that being the Prime Minister doesn ’ t make you immune @ @ @ @ @ It wasn ’ t just MPs laughing at him .
In case you thought that @ @ @ @ @ most embarrassing part of the briefing , it wasn ’ t .
Test and Trace @ @ @ @ @ self-isolate – our 11 favourite funny responses

Twitter
With England’s lockdown set to end in just over a week, Boris Johnson addressed the House of Commons on measures for moving forward.
We discovered that the three tiers of rules would be made more restrictive and that they’d be uniform across the country – so no special arrangements for any areas.
Limited crowds will be allowed back into sports stadia in the lower tiers, and arts performances can take place indoors with the right social distancing.
We also learnt that being the Prime Minister doesn’t make you immune from catastrophic technology failures.
Boris Johnson just muted himself during #PMQs and all the MPs are laughing at him! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 pic.twitter.com/GoJ3274kB5 — Femi😷 (@Femi_Sorry) November 23, 2020
It wasn’t just MPs laughing at him.
1.
I think he might have 'followed the science' into a cupboard by accident https://t.co/nCkmkuJULm — Michael Moran (@TheMichaelMoran) November 23, 2020
2.
Huh I’m starting to think those weren’t IT lessons pic.twitter.com/dFu9gXHt3T — James Felton (@JimMFelton) November 23, 2020
3.
BREAKING: The British Prime Minister's connection to Parliament from No10 Downing St has now been down for 25 minutes. If anything sums up Boris Johnson's handling of the pandemic, this is it. — Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) November 23, 2020
4.
Boris has succeeded in doing something we've all wanted to do for ages….mute himself — Trudi (@Trudski2012) November 23, 2020
5.
He might as well have claimed that the dog ate his laptop at this point. https://t.co/egLeryktIA — Graham Lithgow (@grahamlithgow) November 23, 2020
6.
So the Prime Minister can't answer MPs' questions on Covid because he can't work his laptop and no one can come in and help him work it because he's self-isolating — Michael Deacon (@MichaelPDeacon) November 23, 2020
7.
Particularly embarrassing when I think of all those technology lessons I had. pic.twitter.com/ian7VztGXs — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) November 23, 2020
8.
Should have retrained in cyber. https://t.co/ZpesaEvxdK — Helen Raw (@helenraw) November 23, 2020
In case you thought that #MuteGate must be the most embarrassing part of the briefing, it wasn’t.
Did he just fix his pants in the middle of a speech? pic.twitter.com/U8r6sF4YGQ — James Doleman (@jamesdoleman) November 23, 2020
READ MORE
Test and Trace has told Boris Johnson to self-isolate – our 11 favourite funny responses
Source Femi Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-11-24--Simon McCoy added to the blooper reel with his reaction to a pianist’s monkey concert

Previously , pianist Paul Barton has played the piano for elephants , including a blind elephant named Lam Duan , which he serenaded with a selection of soothing classical pieces .
He has now expanded his animal concert CV by performing for monkeys , which made it onto BBC ’ s news round-up , where national treasure , Simon McCoy , had the difficult task of keeping a straight face .
You ’ ll be glad to know that he isn ’ t actually broken .
Twitter was delighted with this latest addition to the Simon McCoy blooper reel .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ have been bright spots in a dark year – and longer , we can only assume the BBC does these things on purpose to give us a lift .
It would be rude not to share at least one other Simon McCoyism – so here ’ s an absolutely brutal takedown from an item last month .
Time to form a protective square around the McCoyster .
If you want to see Paul playing for Lam Duan , you can do that here .
Simon McCoy on that whale sculpture train crash wins @ @ @ @ @

Videos
Previously, pianist Paul Barton has played the piano for elephants, including a blind elephant named Lam Duan, which he serenaded with a selection of soothing classical pieces.
He has now expanded his animal concert CV by performing for monkeys, which made it onto BBC’s news round-up, where national treasure, Simon McCoy, had the difficult task of keeping a straight face.
He failed.
OH MY GOD we have broken @BBCSimonMcCoy pic.twitter.com/U91pSMgaSX — Scott Bryan (@scottygb) November 23, 2020
You’ll be glad to know that he isn’t actually broken.
It was the elephant mention that did it… Chopin and Bach… I couldn't go on… https://t.co/DYWiNuufqS — Simon McCoy (@BBCSimonMcCoy) November 23, 2020
Twitter was delighted with this latest addition to the Simon McCoy blooper reel.
44 seconds in – oh god I’m crying with laughter https://t.co/Xtx01t8FEs — Poorna Bell (@poornabell) November 23, 2020
OMG! Did this actually happen!? 🤣 https://t.co/bB9sPhPhrz — Greg Owen (@Greg0wen) November 23, 2020
Since Simon McCoy’s funny moments have been bright spots in a dark year – and longer, we can only assume the BBC does these things on purpose to give us a lift.
I admire how much the staff at BBC News are trying to troll Simon McCoy. I really do. pic.twitter.com/UOcTV5t3PY — Scott Bryan (@scottygb) November 23, 2020
It would be rude not to share at least one other Simon McCoyism – so here’s an absolutely brutal takedown from an item last month.
This is a brutal quip at the end of a news report by @BBCSimonMcCoy pic.twitter.com/dEMZpLRYM7 — Scott Bryan (@scottygb) October 28, 2020
Time to form a protective square around the McCoyster.
If you want to see Paul playing for Lam Duan, you can do that here.
READ MORE
Simon McCoy on that whale sculpture train crash wins dad joke of the day
Source BBC Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-11-24--Trump tweeted about starting the Biden transition and the takedowns were epic – our 14 favourites

The deadlock that has prevented the Biden-Harris team from moving ahead with its preparations for January has finally ended .
@ @ @ @ @ which facilitates the smooth running of federal agencies , finally called the election for Joe @ @ @ @ @ of information and access from the Trump administration .
The GSA ’ s Administrator , @ @ @ @ @ have made this move weeks ago , wrote an open letter , casting vague accusations @ @ @ @ @ insisting she had triggered the transition of her own free will .
Trump tweeted about @ @ @ @ @ is a legal requirement and not dependent on his agreement – but , being Trump @ @ @ @ @ concede .
But people still felt the move – and the tweets – amounted to @ @ @ @ @

News
The deadlock that has prevented the Biden-Harris team from moving ahead with its preparations for January has finally ended.
The General Services Agency, which facilitates the smooth running of federal agencies, finally called the election for Joe Biden, triggering the handover of information and access from the Trump administration.
The GSA’s Administrator, Emily Murphy, who should have made this move weeks ago, wrote an open letter, casting vague accusations at Joe Biden, while insisting she had triggered the transition of her own free will.
oh somebody finally decided to do her fucking job https://t.co/MKUaxe147B — Tom Tomorrow (@tomtomorrow) November 23, 2020
Trump tweeted about allowing the move – which is a legal requirement and not dependent on his agreement – but, being Trump, he still refused to concede.
I want to thank Emily Murphy at GSA for her steadfast dedication and loyalty to our Country. She has been harassed, threatened, and abused – and I do not want to see this happen to her, her family, or employees of GSA. Our case STRONGLY continues, we will keep up the good… — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) November 23, 2020
…fight, and I believe we will prevail! Nevertheless, in the best interest of our Country, I am recommending that Emily and her team do what needs to be done with regard to initial protocols, and have told my team to do the same. — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) November 23, 2020
This raised an issue.
Emily Murphy: I made my decisions completely independently. No one influenced my decisions. Trump: I MADE HER DO IT! — Brett Meiselas (@BMeiselas) November 24, 2020
But people still felt the move – and the tweets – amounted to a kind of concession.
1.
This is the closest to a concession Trump is going to get. https://t.co/MIOo521plT — Maggie Haberman (@maggieNYT) November 23, 2020
2.
The tip of a white flag. https://t.co/PMJ1nqLsYP — Greg Miller (@gregpmiller) November 23, 2020
3.
Trump is toast. — Stephen King (@StephenKing) November 23, 2020
4.
Sir, congratulations! There is no shame in admitting you were drop kicked into oblivion three weeks ago by the glorious American people who give thanks for our new President Joseph R. Biden of Delaware! — Josh Marshall (@joshtpm) November 23, 2020
5.
Sir, this is not a Wendy's — Exploding Biblical Kraken Singh, MD 🌊 (@LabyrinthWeaver) November 24, 2020
6.
Anyone who thinks Donald Trump wrote this tweet, please contact me because I want to introduce you to a Nigerian prince. https://t.co/6zRHfjRef9 — Rick Wilson (@TheRickWilson) November 23, 2020
7.


thepoke--2020-11-26--I’m a Celeb viewers are calling the latest Bushtucker Trial the ‘worst ever’ – 9 horrified reactions

I ’ m a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here !
is no stranger when it comes to vomit-inducing challenges , @ @ @ @ @ has even the most die-hard viewers squirming in disgust .
Shane Richie and Jessica Plummer @ @ @ @ @ in the Wicked Waterworks trial , which saw them consume a number of increasingly disgusting @ @ @ @ @ animal parts , bugs , and the aptly named vomit fruit being some of the @ @ @ @ @ re not feeling too squeamish , you can watch the highlights here : Despite the @ @ @ @ @ – or possibly because of it – it ’ s also one of the funniest @ @ @ @ @ ’ s history .
Here are the only 9 reactions you need : This live @ @ @ @ @ wrong and you ’ ll have to watch between your fingers

Pics
I’m a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here! is no stranger when it comes to vomit-inducing challenges, but the latest Bushtucker Trial has even the most die-hard viewers squirming in disgust.
Shane Richie and Jessica Plummer were voted to take part in the Wicked Waterworks trial, which saw them consume a number of increasingly disgusting drinks – fermented eggs, animal parts, bugs, and the aptly named vomit fruit being some of the highlights.
If you’re not feeling too squeamish, you can watch the highlights here:
https://twitter.com/imacelebrity/status/1331721524131360771
Despite the revolting nature of the challenge – or possibly because of it – it’s also one of the funniest Bushtucker Trials in the show’s history.
Here are the only 9 reactions you need:
1.
https://twitter.com/lewisa95/status/1331721894526132224
2.
https://twitter.com/Claireanneor/status/1331719600044724226
3.
4.
5.
this is hands down one of the best trials i’ve ever seen, 10/10 facial expressions from all 4 of them #imaceleb pic.twitter.com/FLVWMd0D90 — georgia ❁ (@georgiaxIeigh) November 25, 2020
6.
7.
Trying to support your friend through all of their terrible life choices: #ImACeleb #ImACelebrity pic.twitter.com/MfXegJBRme — CH (@OfficialCWH) November 25, 2020
8.
Jessica: spitting vomit fruit back out 76 times
Ant and Dec every time:#imaceleb #imacelebrity pic.twitter.com/t2p5X2TzOd — Lauren Grant (@laurenjgrant_) November 25, 2020
9.
Watching your Regretting that
mate incoming last tequila
with a tray of
shots#imacelebrity #ImACeleb pic.twitter.com/SN16MNgVEm — L (@Iseeyou0_0too) November 25, 2020
READ MORE
This live TV fishing segment went horribly wrong and you’ll have to watch between your fingers


thepoke--2020-11-26--This cat has gone viral because of the real-life optical illusion on its chest

The internet has provided us with many mind-bending optical illusions over the years , and it ’ s also fair @ @ @ @ @ s been no shortage of cat photos shared on the world wide web .
However @ @ @ @ @ the two have never successfully mixed… until now .
Don ’ t worry if you @ @ @ @ @ , because you ’ re far from alone .
Here are just some of the @ @ @ @ @ you see two men kissing , a vase , or something else entirely ?
This @ @ @ @ @ with people ’ s brains

Pics
The internet has provided us with many mind-bending optical illusions over the years, and it’s also fair to say that there’s been no shortage of cat photos shared on the world wide web.
However, to our knowledge, the two have never successfully mixed… until now.
https://twitter.com/sam_antics/status/1331279811654856704?s=21
Don’t worry if you’re seeing something else, because you’re far from alone. Here are just some of the things others spotted:
I see two Alfred Hitchcock’s about to kiss https://t.co/UEaIyyiIAj — 🍍ipad baby 🍍 (@jelloxshot) November 25, 2020
a margarita glass — chad, bubbie of chaos (@endofanerajc) November 25, 2020
sorry but I straight up see this https://t.co/6XjWVsPJPB pic.twitter.com/UyjLDVM7D5 — peach burnett’s sanders (@tylrjm) November 25, 2020
Not what you asked, but your cat looks like Nick Offerman. pic.twitter.com/bdZZXTSsxD — Jeff Chausse (@JeffChausse) November 25, 2020
Did you see two men kissing, a vase, or something else entirely?
READ MORE
This next-level floor art is messing with people’s brains


thepoke--2020-11-25--People have been improving movies by adding the “The Muppets” – 19 of the most sensational

It ’ s a truth universally acknowledged that any movie can be improved by adding Muppets .
If you need @ @ @ @ @ look no further than this Twitter thread started by presenter and journalist Tom Campbell .
@ @ @ @ @ disappoint , with people even putting their Photoshop skills to use .
Here are 19 @ @ @ @ @ Ruin a horror movie with just one letter ’ – 17 favourites

Twitter
It’s a truth universally acknowledged that any movie can be improved by adding Muppets. If you need proof of that statement then look no further than this Twitter thread started by presenter and journalist Tom Campbell.
Add "The Muppets" to the start of a movie to make a blockbuster. I'll start: "The Muppet's Shawshank Redemption" — Tom Campbell (@TomCampbell) November 21, 2020
The replies didn’t disappoint, with people even putting their Photoshop skills to use.
Here are 19 of our favourites:
1.
https://twitter.com/minerva_service/status/1330156130685886464
2.
3.
The Muppets Chainsaw Massacre. pic.twitter.com/AQBTrLFqMU — Lou Mac (@loumacarichippy) November 21, 2020
4.
The Muppets: Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. pic.twitter.com/Z5EQ2DgOCC — ImJustSaiyan (@wrath852) November 21, 2020
5.
6.
The Muppets Hellraiser… Demons to some, puppets to others 😆 pic.twitter.com/KVYQoa1qbp — Paul Kane (@PaulKaneShadow) November 21, 2020
7.
Kermit the Frog as James Bond 007 in Ian Fleming's The Muppets The Pig Who Loved Me https://t.co/wsJanK8PPf pic.twitter.com/8Z7hZ2GW67 — Intellectual Duck Web (@pixelkitties) November 21, 2020
8.
The Lord of The Muppets pic.twitter.com/iYHSikDijy — Joel Quirk (@Joel_Quirk) November 21, 2020
9.
10.
The Muppets Exorcist – “The power of Christ compels you Kermit!” pic.twitter.com/0ljVxtxFvH — You had my curiosity, now you have my attention (@Droidzoid) November 21, 2020
11.
12.
The Muppets Die Hard pic.twitter.com/hA2rI6mpdV — Dave (@DaveNWaves) November 21, 2020
13.
https://twitter.com/tttoyourgrave/status/1330206939163275274
14.
i worked too hard on this pic.twitter.com/MHGV1nXtAC — Smimbo: Gold Edition (@SmimboWimbo) November 21, 2020
15.
The Muppets and The Chocolate Factory https://t.co/OGPHw4UdD6 pic.twitter.com/WXKTObH28a — Terry Tierney (@terry_tierney) November 21, 2020
16.
i worked too hard on this pic.twitter.com/MHGV1nXtAC — Smimbo: Gold Edition (@SmimboWimbo) November 21, 2020
READ MORE
‘Ruin a horror movie with just one letter’ – 17 favourites
Source: @TomCampbell


thepoke--2020-11-25--This takedown of these homophobic and racist American Pagans is very satisfying indeed

We first saw this takedown a little while ago and it ’ s just gone viral again on Reddit because @ @ @ @ @ .
It ’ s a response by an Irish Pagan society to some American visitors @ @ @ @ @ get married in Ireland and had some very specific requests .
‘ Sarah has been @ @ @ @ @ boring_bisexual_bee who shared it over on Reddit .
Some very good advice there , we @ @ @ @ @ ‘ Irish paganism is massively anti bigotry .
You ’ ll be hard pressed to @ @ @ @ @ willing to perform a ceremony like that.
’ jodiebeanbee ‘ Paganism in general , at @ @ @ @ @ ’ ve met/been involved with , is extremely anti-bigotry .
That ’ s not to @ @ @ @ @ t problems ( most notably , the treatment of native tribes and the disrespect for @ @ @ @ @ much every group will kick you to the curb if you say stuff like this.
@ @ @ @ @ of an anti-vaxxer mum may never be bettered

Popular
We first saw this takedown a little while ago and it’s just gone viral again on Reddit because people loved it so much.
It’s a response by an Irish Pagan society to some American visitors who were apparently hoping to get married in Ireland and had some very specific requests.
‘Sarah has been reported dead,’ said boring_bisexual_bee who shared it over on Reddit.
Some very good advice there, we can surely all agree.
‘Irish paganism is massively anti bigotry. You’ll be hard pressed to find anyone in thay scene willing to perform a ceremony like that.’ jodiebeanbee ‘Paganism in general, at least the organizations that I’ve met/been involved with, is extremely anti-bigotry. That’s not to say that there isn’t problems (most notably, the treatment of native tribes and the disrespect for closed practices) but pretty much every group will kick you to the curb if you say stuff like this.’ RenegonParagade ‘Thank you Ireland.’ jackiebee66
READ MORE
This brilliant takedown of an anti-vaxxer mum may never be bettered
Source Reddit u/boring_bisexual_bee


thepoke--2020-11-25--This live TV fishing segment went horribly wrong and you’ll have to watch between your fingers

This live TV fishing segment , from Australian TV ’ s Today show is has been described as the ‘ @ @ @ @ @ you ’ ll ever see .
It went viral after it was posted by Vermillion_Crab @ @ @ @ @ could go wrong ’ , which gives you a clue that something goes awry .
@ @ @ @ @ Similar but different was this , featuring the same TV presenter , Karl Stefanovic .

Videos
This live TV fishing segment, from Australian TV’s Today show is has been described as the ‘most Aussie two minutes’ you’ll ever see.
It went viral after it was posted by Vermillion_Crab in the subReddit ‘what could go wrong’, which gives you a clue that something goes awry. Very, very awry.
NO!
Similar but different was this, featuring the same TV presenter, Karl Stefanovic.
Source Reddit u/Vermillion_Crab YouTube


thepoke--2020-11-25--This next-level floor art is messing with people’s brains

Here ’ s a word we don ’ t use very often and no , it ’ s not ‘ @ @ @ @ @ s some anamorphic floor art posted by leonkeer on Instagram that went viral because , @ @ @ @ @ look at this .
And just a few of the things people said about it @ @ @ @ @ @ buitengebieden_ and @ RexChapman on Twitter .
Reminded us of this from a little @ @ @ @ @ cat failed at being sneaky and it ’ s a slow motion delight

Videos
Here’s a word we don’t use very often and no, it’s not ‘art’. It’s some anamorphic floor art posted by leonkeer on Instagram that went viral because, well, just have a look at this.
Proper next level stuff!
And just a few of the things people said about it after it was shared by @buitengebieden_ and @RexChapman on Twitter.
https://twitter.com/samkj27/status/1331323892485517315?s=20
A man drew this. The seat is up. https://t.co/Ac8Ylu8xFl — Brooke Olzendam (@brookeolzendam) November 24, 2020
This broke my brain https://t.co/vHM0SkMFxC — Bottlerocket (@bottlerocket) November 24, 2020
Let’s see if you can figure this out https://t.co/oS6MK5VOX8 — MuslimMarine (@mansoortshams) November 24, 2020
WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED, REX????? https://t.co/8R8Ve2nBzg — Steve (@steveweddle) November 24, 2020
Reminded us of this from a little while back.
I promise its even better the 2nd time you watch it. pic.twitter.com/hU5xBERYlT — Waj (@myconfusedface) January 1, 2019
READ MORE
This sneaky cat failed at being sneaky and it’s a slow motion delight
Source Instagram leonkeer H/T Twitter @buitengebieden_


thepoke--2020-11-25--A Hairdresser quoting Magna Carta to avoid lockdown closure has been fined £17k – 7 responses

Back at the beginning of November , some advice regarding a sneaky little way to get around lockdown rules started @ @ @ @ @ wrongly – very wrongly – claimed that quoting the 805-year-old Magna Carta would allow your @ @ @ @ @ lockdown closures .
Surely no one would believe this , right ?
These are the @ @ @ @ @ : Allison Pearson suggested Priti Patel was too short to be a bully – 5 @ @

Twitter
Back at the beginning of November, some advice regarding a sneaky little way to get around lockdown rules started circulating around Twitter.
Someone wrongly – very wrongly – claimed that quoting the 805-year-old Magna Carta would allow your business to remain open during lockdown closures. Surely no one would believe this, right?
A hairdresser in Bradford put a sign in her window saying she'd stay open during lockdown on the basis of Magna Carta. So the police fined her £1,000. She kept quoting Magna Carta. So they fined her £2,000. She kept quoting Magna Carta. Now she's at £17k. https://t.co/RpgP6n19s7 — Jim Waterson (@jimwaterson) November 24, 2020
These are the only 7 responses you need:
1.
The signing of Magna Carta 1215: pic.twitter.com/WNSHhvpuoP — Mark Blacklock (@MarxMedia) November 24, 2020
2.
Can’t believe this didn’t work, wtf. Next they’ll be telling me the East India Company Act of 1697 doesn’t entitle me to free samosas https://t.co/JVDxa9w40q — Alex von Tunzelmann (@alexvtunzelmann) November 24, 2020
3.
Apparently if you look in the mirror and say "Magna Carta" five times, everything you do is legal. — Mike Stafford (@faithfulpundit) November 24, 2020
4.
Magna Carta, from the Latin "magna" = "Great big" and "carta" = "fine" https://t.co/4eFiyeBNgn — Moose Allain Ꙭ (@MooseAllain) November 24, 2020
5.
Anyone who uses Magna Carta to justify breaking a modern law should be made to recite the whole document from memory, since they’re so fucking well versed. — Shoes Buttback (@DanMakesNoises) November 24, 2020
6.
Hint: if thou must needs cite the Magna Carta to flout the lockdown rules, thou shouldst also insist on trial by combat. With a mace. — William Shakespeare (@Shakespeare) November 24, 2020
7.
OK Facebook got the Magna Carta thing wrong but Bill Gates is definitely putting microchips in the vaccine and there’s a whole other civilisation of advanced beings living in the hollow centre of the earth and Brexit is a great idea and 5G causes something or other. https://t.co/6SkZJw5gtN — Stephen Mangan (@StephenMangan) November 24, 2020
In conclusion:
I feel weirdly sorry for her! This is what happens when you spend too long in an online world watching brainrot videos insisting you can proclaim yourself a free man of the land… without realising that eventually the real world is going to hit you with a court summons. — Jim Waterson (@jimwaterson) November 24, 2020
READ MORE
Allison Pearson suggested Priti Patel was too short to be a bully – 5 favourite responses


thepoke--2020-11-25--This brilliant takedown of an anti-vaxxer mum may never be bettered

The prospect of a vaccine – several vaccines – to help tackle Covid-19 is cause for cautious celebration everywhere .
@ @ @ @ @ an anti-vaxxer , however , that small but vocal minority who insist on ignoring all @ @ @ @ @ about it on Facebook , obviously .
And this takedown of an anti-vaxxer mum who @ @ @ @ @ my unvaccinated kid a danger to your vaccinated kid if vaccines work ?
’ may @ @ @ @ @ .
And just three of the things people said about it .
‘ This was @ @ @ @ @ assassination by words.
’ DoomCircus ‘ Came for the murder , was entranced by the @ @ @ @ @ the science .
Excellent.
’ Gullflyinghigh

Popular
The prospect of a vaccine – several vaccines – to help tackle Covid-19 is cause for cautious celebration everywhere.
Not if you’re an anti-vaxxer, however, that small but vocal minority who insist on ignoring all scientific evidence and telling everyone about it on Facebook, obviously.
And this takedown of an anti-vaxxer mum who asked: ‘How is my unvaccinated kid a danger to your vaccinated kid if vaccines work?’ may never be bettered.
Oof. And just three of the things people said about it.
‘Good murder.’ Nobodieshero816 ‘This was a carefully planned and crafted assassination by words.’ DoomCircus ‘Came for the murder, was entranced by the pox rat, learned from the science. Excellent.’ Gullflyinghigh
Source Reddit u/Slackbeing H/T Bored Panda Indy100


thepoke--2020-11-25--Allison Pearson suggested Priti Patel was too short to be a bully – 5 favourite responses

To the Daily Telegraph , where columnist Allison Pearson says it ‘ beggars belief ’ that Priti Patel could have bullied anyone , despite a damning investigation into the home secretary ’ s conduct .
Pearson says she hasn ’ t spoken to a single person who believes Patel has done anything wrong .
And the reason why she thinks Patel can ’ t have bullied anyone ?
Because she ’ s not very tall ( thought to be 5ft 3in ) and most of the people who work for her are , you know , taller .
Here ’ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ had to say .
‘ I haven ’ t spoken to a single person who believes the Home Secretary ’ s conduct was ‘ bullying ’ … people seem to think it ’ s far more likely she came up against a bunch of white male snobs who seemed averse to actual work and accountability .
‘ It does beggar belief that a woman who is barely more than 5ft tall managed to terrorise all those 6ft 3in public school mandarins.
’ And it prompted no end of responses , as you might @ @ @ @ @ @ @ sneaky cat failed at being sneaky and it ’ s a slow motion delight

Twitter
To the Daily Telegraph, where columnist Allison Pearson says it ‘beggars belief’ that Priti Patel could have bullied anyone, despite a damning investigation into the home secretary’s conduct.
Pearson says she hasn’t spoken to a single person who believes Patel has done anything wrong. And the reason why she thinks Patel can’t have bullied anyone? Because she’s not very tall (thought to be 5ft 3in) and most of the people who work for her are, you know, taller.
“It does beggar belief that a woman who is barely more than 5ft tall managed to terrorise all those 6ft 3in public school mandarins,” writes @allisonpearson https://t.co/2CSVZLj3lj — The Telegraph (@Telegraph) November 25, 2020
Here’s a little bit of what she had to say.
‘I haven’t spoken to a single person who believes the Home Secretary’s conduct was ‘bullying’ … people seem to think it’s far more likely she came up against a bunch of white male snobs who seemed averse to actual work and accountability. ‘It does beggar belief that a woman who is barely more than 5ft tall managed to terrorise all those 6ft 3in public school mandarins.’
And it prompted no end of responses, as you might imagine.
1.
2.
Yes, it’s almost like she had some secret power over them, like being their boss or something … https://t.co/Io7qpAyHYX — Gavin Esler (@gavinesler) November 25, 2020
3.
6” 7’ here. Can’t wait to be the work bully today, now I know how it works. — McGee (@chrismarkmcgee) November 25, 2020
4.
New heights of stupidity here Allison. — Michael Govern Ready (@mikegove12) November 25, 2020
5.
Yeah, if anyone that tall tried to bully me I’d just kick the shit out of them. Properly go to town. They’d need dental records to identify them. And that’s just how workplaces work!! https://t.co/XrA3o139dd — Ed Morrish (@edmorrish) November 25, 2020
To conclude, this.
It beggars belief that people still imagine that bullying is about size. Stalin was 5 foot six. Napoleon notoriously short. https://t.co/WkaCbdiccj — Paul Bernal (@PaulbernalUK) November 25, 2020
And also this.
Allison Pearson's knocked it out of the park again pic.twitter.com/4YkQAlVW1n — James Felton (@JimMFelton) November 25, 2020
READ MORE
This sneaky cat failed at being sneaky and it’s a slow motion delight
Source @Telegraph


thepoke--2020-11-25--This sneaky cat failed at being sneaky and it’s a slow motion delight

This sneaky cat failing at being sneaky has just gone viral on Reddit .
It ’ s not just the @ @ @ @ @ s all about the sneaky exit .
‘ Miscatculated , ’ said nizowosa who shared @ @ @ @ @ few of the things people said about it .
‘ Nothing to see here !
@ @ @ @ @ stage right.
’ Youstink1990 ‘ I love how he is moving in slow motion !
@ @ @ @ @ “ I ’ ve mastered the ability to move so slow…that I become invisible to @ @ @ @ @ criticism of Barack Obama ’ s latest memoirs wins facepalm of the week

Videos
This sneaky cat failing at being sneaky has just gone viral on Reddit. It’s not just the sneaky entrance, it’s all about the sneaky exit.
‘Miscatculated,’ said nizowosa who shared it.
And just a few of the things people said about it.
‘Nothing to see here! I will slowly exit, stage right.’ Youstink1990 ‘I love how he is moving in slow motion! This is hilarious.’ 21hiccups “I’ve mastered the ability to move so slow…that I become invisible to the eye.” YakshaY
READ MORE
This criticism of Barack Obama’s latest memoirs wins facepalm of the week
Source Reddit u/nizowosa YouTube


thepoke--2020-11-25--The 25 funniest tweets from The Great British Bake Off 2020

The Great British Bake Off 2020 has come to an end and what better way to relive the highs and @ @ @ @ @ through some of the funniest tweets .
Warning : there are spoilers for the entire @ @ @ @ @ further to do , here are 25 of the best tweets from Bake Off 2020 @ @ @ @ @ end it with this… ‘ The Great British Bake Off ’ s Noel Fielding as @ @ @ @ @ done

Entertainment
The Great British Bake Off 2020 has come to an end and what better way to relive the highs and lows of the series than through some of the funniest tweets. Warning: there are spoilers for the entire season below.
So without further to do, here are 25 of the best tweets from Bake Off 2020:
1.
ME, WATCHING #GBBO: Huh I wonder who my favorite will be *Sura is shown WALKING HER CAT ON A LEASH in London* ME: OH MY GOD — Mara “Get Rid of the Nazis” Wilson (@MaraWilson) September 27, 2020
2.
3.
4.
https://twitter.com/Ariadne_Griffin/status/1311024552915369985
5.
6.
7.
rowan is utterly unflappable. paul hollywood could say to rowan “I think your bread is absolutely shit” and he’d just look at him over his glasses and say “oh you do, do you” #gbbo pic.twitter.com/nWYhvtTJdF — three steaks pam (@alexandrakuri) October 6, 2020
8.
I love when Sura reacts as if she’s being told about everything in 2020 all at once #GBBO pic.twitter.com/Q77ZikG5mw — Toby Earle (@TobyonTV) October 6, 2020
9.
Sura cannot go. Botched brownies and a bad babka can’t defeat the energy of a woman who walks her cat #gbbo pic.twitter.com/bqc5f83ypo — Bethan Ackerley (@inkerley) October 13, 2020
10.
Can't wait until I can go Paris and see Dave's tart #GBBO pic.twitter.com/TJ9H0hO561 — Tom Percival (@twpercival1) October 20, 2020
11.
Me trying to stay positive when everything is falling apart #GBBO pic.twitter.com/bb38UYJbtj — Jamie Bolton (@JamieBolton) October 27, 2020
12.
Lottie when she wins star baker but Mark goes home shortly after #GBBO pic.twitter.com/ezrhPiDkxj — José (@JDeleay) October 27, 2020
13.
I thought the presidential election would be the most stressful thing I'd watch tonight. Turns it was actually Hermine trying to cook a quiche in twenty seconds #gbbo — shane reaction ☘ (@shane_reaction_) November 3, 2020
14.
this is the most 2020 image i have seen so far #GBBO pic.twitter.com/rmGKYEQt26 — Scott Bryan (@scottygb) November 3, 2020
15.
Paul and Prue: doesn't give timings Paul and Prue when everything is raw: #GBBO pic.twitter.com/sufcCDuBdM — Rebecca (@rebeccawalk114) November 10, 2020
16.
If 2020 was a dessert it’d be a sussex pond pudding #GBBO — Ines Jobin (@ines_slt) November 10, 2020
17.
18.
In honour of chocolate week we are starting a very important petition. #GBBO pic.twitter.com/LqVZKxcg2r — innocent drinks (@innocent) October 13, 2020
19.
I can’t specifically explain why, but I just feel like there’s the soul of a 1800s Victorian child trapped in Peter’s body and it’s trying to escape #gbbo pic.twitter.com/TcDLzj8gwi — Róisín (@roisinamcc) November 17, 2020
20.
Tuning into Bake Off every week despite everything else that’s going on in the world #GBBO pic.twitter.com/J3Uo9t6C1k — Brutally Honest Bake Off (@HonestBakeOff) November 3, 2020
21.
The production team watching the contestants cut through £9 silicon moulds #GBBO pic.twitter.com/vlvmiQur1g — Maisie Ovenden (@maisie_ovenden) November 17, 2020
22.
“Laura, would you please bring your showstopper up please?” #GBBO pic.twitter.com/OLtkRTZIMX — Suzemou (@the0nlyflame) November 17, 2020
23.
24.
25.
Everyone in the UK when Peter wins Bake Off:#GBBO pic.twitter.com/uE8wpZ3w3P — Novelty Bobble (@NoveltyBobble12) November 24, 2020
We’ll just end it with this…
can we just let the producers of great british bake off run the government and live in a whimsical utopia where our biggest crisis is a soggy bottom — Daniel Howell (@danielhowell) October 6, 2020
READ MORE
‘The Great British Bake Off’s Noel Fielding as cakes’ is deliciously well done


thepoke--2020-11-25--‘I really don’t understand the logic of anti-maskers’

The latest in an occasional series , covidiot takedown of the day goes to this exchange shared by Gary_the_mememachine on @ @ @ @ @ ‘ I really don ’ t understand the logic of anti-maskers.
’ And it ’ @ @ @ @ @ genre .
‘ ” You accidentally blocked me ” was the icing on the insult @ @ @ @ @ acronym was the best part in my opinion.
’ mutantblake ‘ There ’ s a @ @ @ @ @ stop trying to understand people and just realise that , sadly , the majority of @ @ @ @ @ totally illogical beliefs .
You just have to resign yourself to it , and choose @ @ @ @ @ Similar but different was this , shared by fellow Redditor beerbellybegone .
Still no vaccine @ @ @

Twitter
The latest in an occasional series, covidiot takedown of the day goes to this exchange shared by Gary_the_mememachine on Reddit by who says: ‘I really don’t understand the logic of anti-maskers.’
And it’s a classic of the genre.
Boom.
‘”You accidentally blocked me” was the icing on the insult cake.’ PN_Guin ‘The acronym was the best part in my opinion.’ mutantblake ‘There’s a point in life where you stop trying to understand people and just realise that, sadly, the majority of people in the world hold totally illogical beliefs. You just have to resign yourself to it, and choose your friends accordingly.’ ragingintrovert57
Similar but different was this, shared by fellow Redditor beerbellybegone.
Still no vaccine for stupidity.
READ MORE
TV fail of the day
Source Reddit u/Gary_the_mememachine u/beerbellybegone


TV fail of the day

In what must be the very definition of a good sport , presenter Catherine Whitaker shared the unfortunate moment when @ @ @ @ @ watch for yourself .
And just in case you were wondering ( of course you @ @ @ @ @ And on that ‘ big chance to become a meme ’ … ‘ Ruin a @ @ @ @ @ letter ’ – 17 favourites

Videos
In what must be the very definition of a good sport, presenter Catherine Whitaker shared the unfortunate moment when, well, have a watch for yourself.
My big chance to become a meme. pic.twitter.com/9dBXbOczxK — Catherine Whitaker (@CWhitakerSport) November 21, 2020
Ouch.
Impressed with the bloke who comes to help and isn’t laughing at all. Although it’s almost as though he expected it. — Sam (@amigatehouse) November 21, 2020
And how he held on to his coffee in the other hand!😂 — Madsness (@Cumberlatched) November 21, 2020
And just in case you were wondering (of course you were wondering!) …
Yes I'm ok by way. And no we weren't live. — Catherine Whitaker (@CWhitakerSport) November 21, 2020
And on that ‘big chance to become a meme’ …
READ MORE
‘Ruin a horror movie with just one letter’ – 17 favourites
Source @CWhitakerSport


thepoke--2020-11-25--‘Ruin a horror movie with just one letter’ – 17 favourites

People are ruining horror movies by changing one letter in their title after the good people of @ HorrorPack said @ @ @ @ @ can be a winning formula – remember when people did it to band names ?
@ @ @ @ @ ’ t disappoint .
Here are our 17 favourites .

Twitter
People are ruining horror movies by changing one letter in their title after the good people of @HorrorPack said this on Twitter.
Ruin a horror movie with just one letter pic.twitter.com/cGLUeKKoK1 — HorrorPack (@HorrorPack) November 23, 2020
It can be a winning formula – remember when people did it to band names? – and this one didn’t disappoint. Here are our 17 favourites.
1.
Spanners — Armando Iannucci (@Aiannucci) November 23, 2020
2.
NIGHTMARE ON ELF STREET https://t.co/j6WfSFs2zB — Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) November 23, 2020
3.
The Wicker Nan — robert0461 (@robert0461) November 23, 2020
4.
5.
Corrie — Sandra Mangan (@SandraMangan_) November 23, 2020
6.
7.
28 Leeks Later (Welsh, with English subtitles) — Mike Foster (@MikeFos66204058) November 23, 2020
8.
The Moist — Richard Kadrey (@Richard_Kadrey) November 23, 2020
9.


thepoke--2020-11-25--Ivanka Trump tried to take credit for falling greenhouse gases – only 5 takedowns you need

When historians pick over the Donald Trump legacy from his four years as president , we ’ re guessing ‘ @ @ @ @ @ change ’ won ’ t be too near the top .
So it was something @ @ @ @ @ Ivanka Trump appearing to take credit for falling greenhouse gases in 2020 .
And these @ @ @ @ @ you need .
It ’ s almost as good as when Priti Patel boasted about @ @ @ @ @ at the start of the pandemic .
This Donald Trump supporter ’ s furious NSFW @ @ @ @ @ is quite the watch

Twitter
When historians pick over the Donald Trump legacy from his four years as president, we’re guessing ‘doing his bit for climate change’ won’t be too near the top.
So it was something of a surprise to find Ivanka Trump appearing to take credit for falling greenhouse gases in 2020.
FACT: Greenhouse gases generated by the U.S. will slide 9.2% this year, tumbling to the lowest level in at least three decades. @EPA — Ivanka Trump (@IvankaTrump) November 24, 2020
And these are surely the only responses you need.
Huh. What could have happened this year that would account for such a massive reduction in greenhouse-gas output, I mean to achieve those sorts of numbers you'd have to have, like, a huge number of Americans stuck at home, not using transportation or participating in the economy https://t.co/24ELQqMlDK — Adam Weinstein (@AdamWeinstein) November 24, 2020
Wow great point Ivanka! let's just have a Covid pandemic every year then https://t.co/kpM2Jg08n8 — Arlen Parsa (@arlenparsa) November 24, 2020
FACT: The coffin business sees its best year in decades! — Paul 👻 (@pablo_honey1) November 24, 2020
Put another way: a pandemic that forced hundreds of millions to stay home as much as possible only reduced greenhouse gas emissions by 9.2%, which means eliminating the other 90.8% will require a massive governmental response. https://t.co/qjq9HrYINK — Lee J. Carter (@carterforva) November 24, 2020
You’re so right, we often forget the silver lining to the inept bungling of the coronavirus response — that along with a quarter million dead and an economy ground to a halt, the reduction in travel was actually good for the environment. So, yay? — Kevin M. Kruse (@KevinMKruse) November 24, 2020
It’s almost as good as when Priti Patel boasted about falling levels of shoplifting back at the start of the pandemic.
Absolutely outstanding. A government that won’t accept that lowering police numbers affects crime levels but will brag about shoplifting being lower during a time where there aren’t actually any shops to lift. pic.twitter.com/GCMxD5e196 — James Felton (@JimMFelton) April 25, 2020
To conclude …
Hm, was it the administration that overturned 100+ environmental protections *OR* was it the fact that your father allowed a pandemic to ravage the country uncontained, shutting down travel and business for most of the year? https://t.co/amsqXeLt6T — Brian Tyler Cohen (@briantylercohen) November 24, 2020
And this.
Society cannot function because your dad botched the pandemic response. This is like bragging about using less gas because you totaled the car. https://t.co/zLVB2hukSj — Public Citizen (@Public_Citizen) November 24, 2020
READ MORE
This Donald Trump supporter’s furious NSFW rant about his election defeat is quite the watch
Source @IvankaTrump Image Pixabay


thepoke--2020-11-25--This short sketch of season 4 of The Crown is 2 minutes and 15 seconds very well spent

If you ’ re a fan of The Crown , this array of impressions by Kieran Hodgson will blow your @ @ @ @ @ aren ’ t a fan of The Crown , it ’ ll make you want @ @ @ @ @ ’ t worry about it containing spoilers – decades of newspapers have already done that @ @ @ @ @ commission a parallel series of this – just Kieran running through whatever happened in each @ @ @ @ @ really loved it .
Best of all , however – and no offence to all @ @ @ @ @ this reaction .
It ’ s only your ACTUAL Gillian Anderson , who plays Margaret @ @ @ @ @ in case you live in a cave or something .
We can ’ t do @ @ @ @ @ reaction .
The 14 funniest reactions to The Crown season 4

Videos
If you’re a fan of The Crown, this array of impressions by Kieran Hodgson will blow your mind – and if you aren’t a fan of The Crown, it’ll make you want to start watching.
Don’t worry about it containing spoilers – decades of newspapers have already done that.
We want Netflix to commission a parallel series of this – just Kieran running through whatever happened in each episode.
Obviously, people really loved it.
Morning. This is just brilliant. https://t.co/56cqxxEpJs — Emma Fielding (@emmagafielding) November 21, 2020
This is great. I won't have to watch "The Crown" now. https://t.co/eHTXJ9ND5s — Fergal Lenehan (@FergalLenehan) November 21, 2020
Best of all, however – and no offence to all these other people – was this reaction.
It’s only your ACTUAL Gillian Anderson, who plays Margaret Thatcher in The Crown, in case you live in a cave or something.
We can’t do better than Kieran’s reaction.
The Lady is for retweeting. https://t.co/lhoshcTO2F — Kieran Hodgson (@KieranCHodgson) November 24, 2020
READ MORE
The 14 funniest reactions to The Crown season 4
Source Kieran Hodgson Image Screengrab, Screengrab


thepoke--2020-11-25--News of a £29 million pot for the Festival of Brexit went down as well as you’d expect

After the better part of a year fighting coronavirus and with a damaging Brexit just over a month away , @ @ @ @ @ spending review has been said to contain some shocks , including a pay freeze for @ @ @ @ @ sector workers .
Following in the wake of an announced pay rise for MPs of @ @ @ @ @ caused understandable uproar , but an extra kick to the soft parts may be delivered @ @ @ @ @ £29 million pot to run the Festival of Brexit turns out to be true .
@ @ @ @ @ finding a used mask in your food delivery , and these tweets are a very @ @ @ @ @ have been saying .

Twitter
After the better part of a year fighting coronavirus and with a damaging Brexit just over a month away, the Chancellor’s upcoming spending review has been said to contain some shocks, including a pay freeze for the UK’s public sector workers.
Following in the wake of an announced pay rise for MPs of £3000, the news has caused understandable uproar, but an extra kick to the soft parts may be delivered if leaked news of a £29 million pot to run the Festival of Brexit turns out to be true.
The story went down like finding a used mask in your food delivery, and these tweets are a very good snapshot of what people have been saying.
1.
The Government said they couldn’t find £20m to feed hungry children over the school holidays, but they can find £29m for a festival of Brexit. Something is very wrong about their priorities… — Luke Pollard MP (@LukePollard) November 24, 2020
2.
Me, happily planning a Festival of Brexit. pic.twitter.com/nNvxK61SeB — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) November 24, 2020
3.
4.
Festival of Brexit – I hear that it will be a festival where you refuse to pay entry while demanding unlimited access to all events — Tal Ofer טל עופר تل عوفر (@TalOfer) November 24, 2020
5.
Nice. That’s the annual salary of over 1000 NHS nurses. Or a small pay rise for every single one of them. https://t.co/HKQC98dogD — Rachel Clarke (@doctor_oxford) November 24, 2020
6.
“You’re not on the Festival of Brexit guest list and you look a bit foreign. On yer bike, son”. pic.twitter.com/5wDPZb0KxY — Mr Roger Quimbly (@RogerQuimbly) November 24, 2020
7.
WHAT THERE ISN’T MONEY FOR:
Paying public sector workers WHAT THERE IS MONEY FOR:
Celebrating the catastrofuck that’s wrecked our country https://t.co/IFiiHbgrMo — David Schneider (@davidschneider) November 24, 2020
8.
Government to spend £29 million on a Festival of Brexit in the #SpendingReview. pic.twitter.com/p4OuYlksIX — Femi😷 (@Femi_Sorry) November 24, 2020
9.
Having a Festival of Brexit sounds about as appropriate as a Festival of Icebergs after the Titanic. — Katy (@KatyJayne101) November 24, 2020
10.


thepoke--2020-11-25--16 reactions to the Christmas Covid rules that are more ‘No way’ than ‘Noël’

In a rare show of unity , all four nations of the United Kingdom have agreed on a strategy of @ @ @ @ @ Christmas .
From the 23rd to the 27th of December , up to three households @ @ @ @ @ in one another ’ s homes , although the government is urging people to seriously @ @ @ @ @ Anyone suffering from déjà vu might be remembering the infamous “ We ’ re leaving @ @ @ @ @ for heaven ’ s sake don ’ t go there ” edict of March .
@ @ @ @ @ the general public is broadly against the idea of loosening the rules , particularly as @ @ @ @ @ could signal a way out of current measures that wouldn ’ t involve killing Granny @ @ @ @ @ reflected those survey results .

News
In a rare show of unity, all four nations of the United Kingdom have agreed on a strategy of relaxing the coronavirus rules over Christmas.
From the 23rd to the 27th of December, up to three households will be allowed to mingle in one another’s homes, although the government is urging people to seriously consider not doing so.
All four UK nations have agreed that from the 23rd to the 27th of December, you will be able to form a Christmas bubble of no more than three households.
https://t.co/5qLRcLBP8W pic.twitter.com/boonZD27Q8 — Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson) November 24, 2020
Anyone suffering from déjà vu might be remembering the infamous “We’re leaving the pubs open, but for heaven’s sake don’t go there” edict of March.
Recent surveys had shown that the general public is broadly against the idea of loosening the rules, particularly as the existence of three vaccines could signal a way out of current measures that wouldn’t involve killing Granny.
It looks like Twitter reflected those survey results.
1.
Shit. Hope mine isn’t one of the three. Bad luck if yours is one. https://t.co/9ucFzsrD6w — Michael Legge (@michaellegge) November 24, 2020
2.
COVID-19 watching Boris Johnson announce a Christmas lockdown holiday pic.twitter.com/wRHW9JoaQh — Grace Petrie (@gracepetrie) November 23, 2020
3.
Three households will be allowed to meet for up to five days over Christmas.
This is a big sacrifice for me as it means I won't be able to see most of my children.#christmas https://t.co/mdnKgrBSpS — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) November 24, 2020
4.
So it’s nobody in your house if you’re Tier 2 or 3 unless it’s the five days around Christmas when COVID magically doesn’t exist. Love to see the science on that. — Emma Kennedy (@EmmaKennedy) November 24, 2020
5.
They should make the Christmas three households rules mandatory but also you don’t get to pick which households you spend it with — Mollie Goodfellow (@hansmollman) November 24, 2020
6.
.@BorisJohnson Is it legal for you to be visited by three ghosts this Christmas? — Adam Kay (@amateuradam) November 24, 2020
7.
🎶On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
CO-VID NINE-TEEN🎶 https://t.co/GzKCE8EBY6 — Nick Pettigrew (@Nick_Pettigrew) November 24, 2020
8.


thepoke--2020-11-25--The Great British Bake Off 2020: The Final – 16 of the funniest tweets

The final episode of Bake Off 2020 saw the three remaining bakers – Dave , Laura , and Peter – @ @ @ @ @ .
During the episode , the finalists had to make eight custard slices in the @ @ @ @ @ whirls in the technical challenge , and dessert towers for the showstopper .
In the @ @ @ @ @ fellow finalists , becoming the youngest champion at just 20 years old .
Here are @ @ @ @ @ from the episode : The Great British Bake Off 2020 : patisserie week – 14 @ @ @ @

Pics
The final episode of Bake Off 2020 saw the three remaining bakers – Dave, Laura, and Peter – all fight for the crown.
During the episode, the finalists had to make eight custard slices in the signature bake, eight walnut whirls in the technical challenge, and dessert towers for the showstopper. In the end, Peter beat his fellow finalists, becoming the youngest champion at just 20 years old.
Here are 16 of the funniest tweets from the episode:
1.
Me watching the Bake Off final when Hermine isn’t in it#GBBOFinal #GBBO pic.twitter.com/r5DZ1Q0GMf — Helen Glynn-Jones (@AuthorHelenJ) November 24, 2020
2.
https://twitter.com/OfficialCWH/status/1331330404356403203
3.
https://twitter.com/Lizzyharveyx/status/1331333407108960256
4.
5.
I’m waiting for Prue to start singing:
“I close my eyeees, drew back the curtain! Ah ah ah” #GBBO pic.twitter.com/4FOv20Uj4k — Hannah L (@ChamoMeHannah) November 24, 2020
6.
Prue absolutely smashing the Elmer look tonight #GBBOFinal pic.twitter.com/Q8PUGmI3sH — Will Buxton (@wbuxtonofficial) November 24, 2020
7.
8.
Sort of hoping that Laura just goes “Ah, fuck it”, downs 6 gins, serves up a butterscotch Angel Delight for her showstopper, then smacks it straight into Paul Hollywood’s face.#GBBO #GBBOFinal — Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) November 24, 2020
9.
Throwing Mr Spoon out of the tent is probably the only decision of this season I've actually agreed with #GBBO pic.twitter.com/xTyNPreefy — Lewis Addlington-Lee (@Lewis_ALee) November 24, 2020
10.
Imagine the iconic looks we’d have from Lottie in the final of Bake Off. Such a shame. #GBBO #GBBOFinal pic.twitter.com/8JBmyDTwjY — CH (@OfficialCWH) November 24, 2020
11.
dave just vibing at the end of the showstopper while peter and laura are in anxious despair #gbbo #gbbofinal pic.twitter.com/SA4LmEKZ6Y — cici (@sweetfoolsss) November 24, 2020
12.
Bake off contestants: "Can't we just have air con in here?"
Director: "No"
"Why not"
"For the tension"
"But this isn't how baking works"
"I will start a fire in here too if you don't bake"
"but the chocolate"
"Shut up"#GBBO — TechnicallyRon (@TechnicallyRon) November 24, 2020
13.
Laura placing her final bake at the end of her counter #GBBO #GBBOFinal pic.twitter.com/uGfmoNUZZV — Um Bongo (@Pedzter_Matic) November 24, 2020
14.
Peter saying he’s gonna put his #gbbo cake stand in a student house is the bravest thing I’ve ever heard — Abi M (@ab_normality_) November 24, 2020
15.
Everyone in the UK when Peter wins Bake Off:#GBBO pic.twitter.com/uE8wpZ3w3P — Novelty Bobble (@NoveltyBobble12) November 24, 2020
16.
WHY DOES THIS QUAINT SHOW ABOUT CAKES IN A TENT MAKE ME CRY EVERY BLOODY YEAR #GBBO pic.twitter.com/iAfPoVYbv6 — Daniel J. Layton (@DanielJLayton) November 24, 2020
In conclusion:
Bake Off could have easily skipped this year… ..but they didn't. Instead the production team, catering, hotel staff and the cast self-isolated for a week and then bubbled *for weeks* so that the show could air. A huge commitment, for a show we really needed #GBBO pic.twitter.com/W3KF2HABOP — Scott Bryan (@scottygb) November 24, 2020
READ MORE
The Great British Bake Off 2020: patisserie week – 14 of the funniest tweets


thepoke--2020-11-24--Literally just 27 hilarious food tweets guaranteed to make British people laugh

Feeling hungry ?
Here are 27 brilliantly funny tweets – all of them about food , of course – to @ @ @ @ @ 16 very funny tweets from the brilliant Fake Showbiz News account

Twitter
Feeling hungry? Here are 27 brilliantly funny tweets – all of them about food, of course – to feed your appetite:
1.
If you need cheering up, here's a photo of the time my stepmum asked for cheese and biscuits at a hotel. 😂😂😂 pic.twitter.com/WZTnrYdtb6 — Steph Kerr 💙 (@stephkerr) March 1, 2015
2.
Wonder how many times Rod Hull used Emu to take hot stuff out of the oven. — Aidan Kelly (@AidanKe42592122) May 18, 2020
3.
my dad has just taken dad jokes to a whole new level pic.twitter.com/S7pklb4EhX — jess🌱 (@jess_huntx) July 26, 2016
4.
Here talk aboot the school being skint ,Puttin icing on a hot dog roll and calling it a cake Ahahahahahaha pic.twitter.com/J3Gfu5zM1R — Skye (@skyemclauchlin_) April 18, 2016
5.
What the Soleros see when I open the freezer. pic.twitter.com/wzAz84yUr2 — Jon Birchall (@jonbir90) July 28, 2019
6.
Does anyone else actually have nightmares about unbranded rogue corner shop sarnies like this?? Who made it?? Who BUYS these?? Make it stop pic.twitter.com/bjwV6xdC2x — emma (@emchadders) August 14, 2017
7.
Picked up my mum steaming and she said "can we get chips" to which I replied "no we have some in the freezer",been waiting years to say that — Pete Bradley (@PEEBZ_B) July 7, 2017
8.
often think about this moment from my parents wedding video where the cameraman just zoomed in on a plate of ham pic.twitter.com/ariepazNFN — Sophie Gadd (@sophie_gadd) January 25, 2016
9.
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of pic.twitter.com/FPHWOlA1yD — chord gang (@head_moths) July 20, 2019
10.
12.99 tae look like a bit a ravioli pic.twitter.com/gJRilegE6M — Harley (@_harleycampbell) June 5, 2017
11.
I've just had a great idea for a children's book. pic.twitter.com/N2AmIwQVby — Chris Goode (@beescope) December 8, 2015
12.
https://twitter.com/OpenMindMH/status/1243675014135787521
13.
FaceTiming my oven so I can see when my garlic bread is done. pic.twitter.com/r3d3znrMJ3 — Jorge (@GeorgeTweetings) August 29, 2016
14.
I found the tunnel to heaven guys pic.twitter.com/5Oqs1K6eCt — Boris (@ReeceCrotonn) January 26, 2017
15.
Old McDonald’s: now a farm https://t.co/2hCIGAaEhE — aadvark deutschmark (@Mrs_Foo_Cough) April 21, 2020
16.
Alright stop, refrigerate and listen pic.twitter.com/MKsZGp1mpN — Jody Porter (@jodyporter_) November 24, 2016
17.
I asked for popcorn chicken at a restaurant in Spain and this is what I got !! pic.twitter.com/8iq0DZHKI1 — SW (@ShaniaWillis2) July 20, 2016
18.
I bloody love Jamie Oliver’s Keep Cooking and Carry On because he says you can substitute ingredients for ones you do have in the cupboard. I made his Aubergine Curry Dal with Herby Flatbreads tonight. pic.twitter.com/kYvOnE2LFv — Tuppence Pennyapple III (@fabulucy) April 6, 2020
19.
My 13 year old brother was asked to create a sandwich shop idea in business management and this is what he came up with 😂😂😂 pic.twitter.com/8sZeRpjkw9 — KS (@kaitssweeney) December 15, 2016
20.
Why are there biscuits in the sewing kit tin? pic.twitter.com/Mx7RozoMbF — Indian Stats v2 (@Indian_stats) October 23, 2016
21.
So Iceland have just released DipDab ice lollies and I left the sherbet on the side because I didn’t want it and now my mum thinks I’m dealing x pic.twitter.com/6Kza5KiY9C — Dan (@dancooledaily) April 27, 2020
22.
the "vegetarian" section at my local aldi is literally just garlic bread and as a vegetarian i'm very happy and here for it pic.twitter.com/CvAbffK42K — seph ✨ (@gnarlydweeb) July 29, 2017
23.
Imagine coming to wetherspoons dressed as one of the plates… pic.twitter.com/XzCw4EYSLz — Callum (@CallumWright96) September 15, 2016
24.
No Scottish shortbread for you little man! pic.twitter.com/MKQzPLo3Qj — Conor Collins (@conartworks) March 10, 2016
25.
https://twitter.com/DazGaz_/status/1194925188271529984
26.
Some people drunk text their ex: pic.twitter.com/cMIWYktZxc — Holly (@HLLYDWSN) October 25, 2016
27.
I'm literally having KFC why my mum arranged it like she Gordon Ramsay pic.twitter.com/7MC49bPVgX — sophie thompson (@sophxthompson) January 3, 2016
READ MORE
Just 16 very funny tweets from the brilliant Fake Showbiz News account


thepoke--2020-11-26--‘Thomas the Scream Engine’ is giving people nightmares

Don ’ t have nightmares , people .
Well , not too many .
‘ Fear is the best fuel.
@ @ @ @ @ are entirely stationary and it ’ s blowing people ’ s minds

Videos
Don’t have nightmares, people. Well, not too many.
‘What a terrible day to have eyes.’ Bolt_the_jolteon ‘Fear is the best fuel.’ tooncorbi ‘Kill it with fire please.’ DukeNukem4ever1999
READ MORE
These revolving circles are entirely stationary and it’s blowing people’s minds
Source Reddit u/Jommy69 Imgur


thepoke--2020-11-26--People were a tad sceptical about Boris Johnson’s letter “from an 8-year-old” – 10 funny responses

Boris Johnson took time out from his busy schedule doing whatever it is he gets paid for , to share this letter he said he received – and the response he said he wrote – on Twitter .
Father of six , Jacob Rees-Mogg responded with news of his brood .
Journalist , Jane Merrick observed that , if real , it was certainly a sad situation for such a young child to have that kind of worry .
And Alistair Haimes cautioned against Santa being complacent .
Now , Monti could well be a real boy , and if @ @ @ @ @ @ @ a wonderful Christmas in spite of the restrictions , but it ’ s hardly surprising that people might be sceptical about any claims from a man who was fired twice for lying , lied to the Queen and claimed to have an oven-ready Brexit deal .
It was that spirit of scepticism and associated mockery that gave rise to these responses .
Twitter ’ s favourite Boris Johnson parody account was a little sceptical too – for a different reason .
Jacob Rees-Mogg shared a note from a Brexiter child and got ripped @ @

Twitter
Boris Johnson took time out from his busy schedule doing whatever it is he gets paid for, to share this letter he said he received – and the response he said he wrote – on Twitter.
Monti (aged 8) wrote to me asking if Father Christmas will be able to deliver presents this year 🎅🎁🎄 I've had lots of letters about this, so I have spoken with experts and can assure you that Father Christmas will be packing his sleigh and delivering presents this Christmas! pic.twitter.com/pXwcjHSxZg — Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson) November 25, 2020
Father of six, Jacob Rees-Mogg responded with news of his brood.
"The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, in hopes that St Nicholas soon would be there."
My troop are certainly relieved that Father Christmas will be able to use a travel corridor. https://t.co/HeWzruZoN9 — Jacob Rees-Mogg (@Jacob_Rees_Mogg) November 25, 2020
Journalist, Jane Merrick observed that, if real, it was certainly a sad situation for such a young child to have that kind of worry.
A very sweet letter from Monti but also a little bit heartbreaking that, for younger children, coronavirus is so deeply ingrained into everyday life. https://t.co/f9eP6PQWyD — Jane Merrick (@janemerrick23) November 25, 2020
And Alistair Haimes cautioned against Santa being complacent.
Santa should be extremely worried about a U-turn, and should remember that the tiers change every 14 days. https://t.co/8BC0tzpNXZ — Alistair Haimes (@AlistairHaimes) November 25, 2020
Now, Monti could well be a real boy, and if he is, we hope he has a wonderful Christmas in spite of the restrictions, but it’s hardly surprising that people might be sceptical about any claims from a man who was fired twice for lying, lied to the Queen and claimed to have an oven-ready Brexit deal.
It was that spirit of scepticism and associated mockery that gave rise to these responses.
1.
Dear Monti
Having received a huge number of letters from children, it is such a relief to find one that isn't about me being their father. https://t.co/z9wECG72qS — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) November 25, 2020
2.
Tim Montgomerie is younger than he looks isn't he https://t.co/ItW9UDcGoh — Jonn Elledge (@JonnElledge) November 25, 2020
3.
"Okay guys, I'm almost done. I just need a good name? What's a normal working class name that loads of regular people give their kids?" https://t.co/Otl0R186Xr — Stuart Millard (@franticplanet) November 25, 2020
4.
the real genius of 'Monti' here is their uncanny ability to fit a letter into an envelope without folding it https://t.co/hY4hmGZhq7 — dan hett (@danhett) November 25, 2020
5.
This is a good time for me to state that if a letter from a child begins with "I am X years old", I will by default believe it was written by an adult. This suspicion obviously multiplies when it involves a post from the Downing Street press officer handling yer man's account. https://t.co/gHrIODbKTy — Brendan Harkin (@brendanjharkin) November 25, 2020
6.
Yeah but what about the kids of runaway, deadbeat dads? https://t.co/FKVbptDVk2 — Britgirl Hates Brexit and These Tory Loons #FBPE (@MarieAnnUK) November 25, 2020
7.
I thought Carrie would have better writing. https://t.co/S5Axxt5t4d — Melindi Scott (@melindiscott) November 25, 2020
8.
Months in the future it will emerge that Monti had sat next to the PM at a Conservative fundraising dinner. https://t.co/K7ikHFz9Wy — Emilio Casalicchio (@e_casalicchio) November 25, 2020
9.
A tenner says "Monti" is writing from Barnard Castle. https://t.co/24z2ph20yt — Lolita Westinghouse (@lolwestinghouse) November 25, 2020
10.
Make the most of it, kids. Next year, Santa will be held up in customs and your parents will be paying WTO tariffs on your presents. — RogerJarman 😷🤞🇪🇸 (@pedanteric5) November 25, 2020
Twitter’s favourite Boris Johnson parody account was a little sceptical too – for a different reason.
Children are so funny, they believe the most ridiculous things. I mean fancy thinking that I'm "very busy". pic.twitter.com/3aWw7OYXa4 — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) November 25, 2020
READ MORE
Jacob Rees-Mogg shared a note from a Brexiter child and got ripped to bits
Source Boris Johnson Image Boris Johnson, Screengrab


thepoke--2020-11-26--This Donald Trump lawyer just delivered one of the all-time great self-owns

In the all-time self-own hall of fame , this is surely somewhere close to the top .
It ’ s @ @ @ @ @ attorney and senior legal adviser to outgoing president Donald Trump and his team , taking @ @ @ @ @ who don ’ t like being told the truth .
And it ’ s so @ @ @ @ @ stop looking at it , highlighted by @ jimmfelton over on Twitter .
‘ For @ @ @ @ @ has been attributed to Roosevelt , but there isn ’ t a specific record of @ @ @ @ @ speech .
I posted it because the ifea [ sic ] itself is true , @ @ @ @ @ it : ) ’ It ’ s the lack of self-awareness that gets you most @ @ @ @ @ everything else .
This brutal takedown of a fellow gameshow contestant is hilarious

Twitter
In the all-time self-own hall of fame, this is surely somewhere close to the top.
It’s Jenna Ellis a constitutional law attorney and senior legal adviser to outgoing president Donald Trump and his team, taking aim at ‘liberals’ who don’t like being told the truth.
And it’s so good we can’t stop looking at it, highlighted by @jimmfelton over on Twitter.
‘For people asking, this quotation has been attributed to Roosevelt, but there isn’t a specific record of him saying this in a speech. I posted it because the ifea [sic] itself is true, whether or not he said it :)’
It’s the lack of self-awareness that gets you most. Well, that and everything else.
So, if I understand you correctly, your point is that the truth is irrelevant to the pursuit of the truth. Fascinating. — Dr. Paul Salay (@pwsalay) November 25, 2020
For people asking, this quote has been attributed to Jenna Ellis, but there isn't a specific record of her saying it. The idea of her saying it is true! 🙂 pic.twitter.com/pM6qCEa1zd — Spector Hair Day (@SpectorHairDay) November 25, 2020
Here's a Teddy Roosevelt quote: “To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public.” — Chris Papalia (@papalia_chris) November 25, 2020
READ MORE
This brutal takedown of a fellow gameshow contestant is hilarious
Source Twitter @JennaEllisEsq H/T @jimmfelton


thepoke--2020-11-26--Whoever designed this ‘social distancing escalator’ is going up in the world

We don ’ t have a favourite escalator but if we did it would be this one , shared by @ @ @ @ @ Whoever designed that is going up in the world .
‘ It ’ s going @ @ @ @ @ get out of this and there ’ s stickers and painted lines 6 ’ a @ @ @ @ @ ‘ Personally , I ’ m ok with this permanently .
Like why do you @ @ @ @ @ to me on an escalator anyways ?
This is doing wonders for my personal space.
@ @ @ @ @ another way of making sure customers stick to the rules .
It had this sign @ @ @ @ @ savage comeback over staying safe in the pandemic was best in class

Pics
We don’t have a favourite escalator but if we did it would be this one, shared by Redditor Jaimass who said: ‘Social distancing escalator at local mall.’
Whoever designed that is going up in the world.
‘It’s going to be weird when we get out of this and there’s stickers and painted lines 6’ a part almost everywhere.’ mr_bots ‘Personally, I’m ok with this permanently. Like why do you need to stand so close to me on an escalator anyways? This is doing wonders for my personal space.’ cutiepie538
This shop had another way of making sure customers stick to the rules. It had this sign.
READ MORE
This grandma’s savage comeback over staying safe in the pandemic was best in class
Source Reddit u/Jaimass


thepoke--2020-11-26--These revolving circles are entirely stationary and it’s blowing people’s minds

Leading contender for optical illusion of the week is surely this one , a pair of revolving circles which – despite all appearances to the contrary , are entirely stationary .
Well , apart from the fact they ’ re revolving but , well , anyway , you ’ ll see what we mean .
Hear that noise ?
It ’ s the sound of minds being blown .
‘ Why can i still tell which direction they are “ moving ” when I obscure the arrows ?
’ MrBowlfish ‘ There are very thin rings on the outside and @ @ @ @ @ @ @ the same blue and yellow colors .
Those thin rings are manipulated in ways that when compared to the large rotating rings tricks the brain to perceive it as movement or change in size .
It ’ s a very good illusion !
The arrows are there to either complement the effect or convince the viewer that the rings are moving/changing in size when you remove them.
’ EverydayEnthusiast And if you ’ re still not convinced , there was this , made by fellow Redditor AintAintAWord .
This brutal takedown of a @ @ @ @ @

Pics
Leading contender for optical illusion of the week is surely this one, a pair of revolving circles which – despite all appearances to the contrary, are entirely stationary.
Well, apart from the fact they’re revolving but, well, anyway, you’ll see what we mean.
Hear that noise? It’s the sound of minds being blown.
‘Why can i still tell which direction they are “moving” when I obscure the arrows?’ MrBowlfish
‘There are very thin rings on the outside and inside of the large rings, featuring the same blue and yellow colors. Those thin rings are manipulated in ways that when compared to the large rotating rings tricks the brain to perceive it as movement or change in size. It’s a very good illusion! The arrows are there to either complement the effect or convince the viewer that the rings are moving/changing in size when you remove them.’ EverydayEnthusiast
And if you’re still not convinced, there was this, made by fellow Redditor AintAintAWord .
Amazing.
‘Blink quickly and they’ll stop moving.’ Helpful2
READ MORE
This brutal takedown of a fellow gameshow contestant is hilarious
Source Twitter @jagarikin Reddit u/umjustpassingby


thepoke--2020-11-26--Haircuts, tiers and vaccines – the 12 funniest pandemic posts we’ve seen today

The discussion around the loosening of the coronavirus rules looks set to rumble on , probably long after the festivities @ @ @ @ @ number has shot up .
But that ’ s not the only pandemic problem on @ @ @ @ @ Chips , tests and vaccines – our 11 favourite new lockdown laughs

Twitter
The discussion around the loosening of the coronavirus rules looks set to rumble on, probably long after the festivities are over and the R number has shot up.
But that’s not the only pandemic problem on people’s minds.
1.
finding someone to kiss on new year’s eve except it’s finding someone to kiss on vaccine day — Mollie Goodfellow (@hansmollman) November 22, 2020
2.
When you haven’t quite remembered Hands Face Space pic.twitter.com/poacFm26Id — Ivo Graham (@IvoGraham) November 22, 2020
3.
"The Thing," a movie about a group of people who don't even really like each other stuck together in a single, snowbound location trying to figure out who has a terrifying infection, counts as a Christmas movie this year. — Zack Budryk (@BudrykZack) November 22, 2020
4.
Boris Johnson following the science pic.twitter.com/DpNGnvuWoO — James Felton (@JimMFelton) November 23, 2020
5.
To be honest I'm slightly disappointed we don't have a reality TV show following the teams of scientists competing to develop a coronavirus vaccine. I even have a host in mind. We could call it RuPaul's Drug Race. — Pundamentalism (@Pundamentalism) November 23, 2020
6.
Trump University announces its vaccine is 7000% effective, even on the toughest stains pic.twitter.com/AYnjsCJb1z — Mockeree (@mockeree) November 23, 2020
7.
God the sheer stupidity of this government. A week off from restrictions at Christmas. Are you mental ? What did you get from Santa this year ? Coronavirus ! — Douglas Henshall (@djhenshall) November 23, 2020
8.
You need an extension built, so you hire a guy you know from school who has never built an extension before, who takes all the money and just glues a dollhouse to your window and then fucks off. Anyway this is how tories have dealt with PPE contracts during a pandemic. — TechnicallyRon (@TechnicallyRon) November 26, 2020
9.
Never mind xmas when can we get a haircut again? pic.twitter.com/wZAjBlMfpk — Paul (@bingowings14) November 20, 2020
10.
I'm guessing the Oxford vaccine is only 70% effective because no-one knows how to use it correctly — Chris PG 🌈 twitch.tv/ThatChrisPG (@chrispurchase) November 23, 2020
11.
A nervous wait for people in the North as they wait to see if London will be in Tier 3 thus ensuring the government continues to give everyone financial support. — David Schneider (@davidschneider) November 23, 2020
12.
Saw an old school mate on Facebook write about the Oxford vaccine & how it'll change your DNA.
This is the same twat who tried to set his desk on fire with a Bunsen burner in Chemistry — joe heenan (@joeheenan) November 23, 2020
READ MORE
Chips, tests and vaccines – our 11 favourite new lockdown laughs
Image Apothecary 87 on Unsplash, @bingowings14


thepoke--2020-11-26--The only 12 hilarious reactions you need to the horrifying Clifford the Big Red Dog trailer

Some good news for lovers of horrifying CGI animals in movie trailers as classics of the genre like Cats and @ @ @ @ @ company in the form of Clifford the Big Red Dog .
Paramount have dropped a @ @ @ @ @ of the beloved children ’ s book series , giving us our first glimpse of @ @ @ @ @ red dog .
You can watch the full teaser in all its glory here : @ @ @ @ @ has tongues wagging , with reactions ranging from “ too small ” to “ what @ @ @ @ @ ?
!
” .
Here are 12 of the funniest : People have been improving @ @ @ @ @ The Muppets ” – 19 of the most sensational

Twitter
Some good news for lovers of horrifying CGI animals in movie trailers as classics of the genre like Cats and Sonic the Hedgehog have new company in the form of Clifford the Big Red Dog.
Paramount have dropped a trailer for the live-action adaption of the beloved children’s book series, giving us our first glimpse of the movie’s iconic red dog.
You can watch the full teaser in all its glory here:
https://twitter.com/CliffordMovie/status/1331598523784192000
Needless to say, it has tongues wagging, with reactions ranging from “too small” to “what in the hell is that?!”.
Here are 12 of the funniest:
1.
Therapist: Clifford the big red dog isn't real. He can't hurt you Clifford the big red dog in real life: pic.twitter.com/7nsYS3DANB — Joel H (@joelfoal) November 25, 2020
2.
the cast of Clifford the Big Red Dog, in theaters 2021. pic.twitter.com/3v23wgEZuB — Dan (@kingdeficit) November 25, 2020
3.
clifford is already drenched in the blood of his enemies and he isn't finished. pic.twitter.com/pb4TWe22KV — a sinkhole of rats (@Kathriller) November 25, 2020
4.
looking at the new Clifford render like pic.twitter.com/9UkGCb5C39 — Quinton Reviews🎬 (@Q_Review) November 25, 2020
5.
it’s been so long since we had a CGI monstrosity to bully. we needed this ❤ https://t.co/GA5NfJBiCH — soul nate (@MNateShyamalan) November 25, 2020
6.
new clifford the big red dog movie be looking like this idc pic.twitter.com/pxmezZr610 — Butterfree (@FunnyButterfree) November 25, 2020
7.
the clifford the clifford
I want mom says we have
at home pic.twitter.com/PpiCJRQKHF — NEON NO (@Neon_woof) November 25, 2020
8.
I Just realized I never processed that a live action Clifford the big red dog would feature a literal big red dog until right now https://t.co/5awUik0Oru — mac kahey, birthday boy (@MacDoesIt) November 25, 2020
9.
Everyone: “Wow I can’t wait to see what the live action Clifford The Big Red Dog looks like!” Clifford: *Looks like Big Red Dog* Everyone: pic.twitter.com/jKEbPg5eOu — Zach•BLM (@og_starr) November 25, 2020
10.
Release a version of Clifford the Big Red dog pre-CGI you cowards pic.twitter.com/6LfjrFAr6O — Ang Ferraguto (@MagnaFarta) November 25, 2020
11.
Listen, if I’ve learned anything from Sonic the Hedgehog, it’s that we can all cyber bully a Hollywood studio enough to get a better looking Clifford the Big Red Dog than this. pic.twitter.com/47C9M9vSms — Matt Herms (@MattHerms) November 25, 2020
12.
wait wait i know how we can fix the clifford movie pic.twitter.com/CiLvW48GkP — jonny sun wrote a new book! (@jonnysun) November 25, 2020
READ MORE
People have been improving movies by adding the “The Muppets” – 19 of the most sensational
Source: @CliffordMovie


thepoke--2020-11-26--This grandma’s savage comeback over staying safe in the pandemic was best in class

Leading contender for comeback of the week comes courtesy of this exchange shared by Redditor techsavior who said : ‘ @ @ @ @ @ !
’ It was a tweet by @ decentbirthday highlighting a family exchange that went @ @ @ @ @ takedown of a fellow gameshow contestant is hilarious

Popular
Leading contender for comeback of the week comes courtesy of this exchange shared by Redditor techsavior who said: ‘Grandma with the savage comeback!’
It was a tweet by @decentbirthday highlighting a family exchange that went like this.
Boom.
"When he said it is good enough to die for I didn't think he was being so literal" — aran (@arancaytar) November 24, 2020
Grannie told nathan to Shut Up and i really appreciate it — ✿ hope ✿ ia-check pinned (@wednesdaydrewds) November 24, 2020
Grandma woke up and chose violence — Cease (@de_cease) November 24, 2020
your grandma be like pic.twitter.com/hm3bdr614p — Olliekay (@Olliekay4) November 23, 2020
READ MORE
This brutal takedown of a fellow gameshow contestant is hilarious
Source Twitter @decentbirthday Reddit u/techsavior Image Pexels


thepoke--2020-11-26--This brutal takedown of a fellow gameshow contestant is hilarious

This takedown of a fellow contestant on iconic US quiz show Jeopardy has gone viral because it ’ s so @ @ @ @ @ very funny .
The clip , which went viral on Reddit after it was shared @ @ @ @ @ paying tributes all over again to Jeopardy ’ s late , great host Alex Trebek @ @ @ @ @ segment went horribly wrong and you ’ ll have to watch between your fingers

Videos
This takedown of a fellow contestant on iconic US quiz show Jeopardy has gone viral because it’s so brutal. And very, very funny.
Ooof.
‘Yo that was fucking savage.’ shelby4t2 ‘Ken’s “wow” is just the cherry on top.’ GroovyGhouly
The clip, which went viral on Reddit after it was shared by usheikh121 also got people paying tributes all over again to Jeopardy’s late, great host Alex Trebek.
‘RIP Alex Trebek.’ CupofKourtts
READ MORE
This live TV fishing segment went horribly wrong and you’ll have to watch between your fingers
Source Reddit u/usheikh121 YouTube


thepoke--2020-11-26--Everybody needs to watch this hilarious lesson in turkey anatomy

As America prepares for a very subdued Thanksgiving , families across the US will have been getting their turkeys ready @ @ @ @ @ of Ninja Warrior , Akbar Gbajabiamila , shared a TikTok of three of his children @ @ @ @ @ bird .
It ’ s one hilarious misconception after another .
That last girl was @ @ @ @ @ her dad say the word she thought was coming .
It found its way to @ @ @ @ @ not the first time a turkey neck has caused that kind of confusion , but @ @ @ @ @ reaction was a little more extreme .
They should all be thankful they don ’ @ @ @ @ @ turkey neck until Christmas .
This Grandma served her Thanksgiving coronavirus advice with a side @ @ @

Videos
As America prepares for a very subdued Thanksgiving, families across the US will have been getting their turkeys ready for the oven.
Host of Ninja Warrior, Akbar Gbajabiamila, shared a TikTok of three of his children’s reactions to their bird.
It’s one hilarious misconception after another.
That last girl was really determined not to hear her dad say the word she thought was coming.
It found its way to Twitter.
The last girl is really a whole mood https://t.co/C0vHqI1zSX — Jimmy Neutron (@_Cookieee28) November 26, 2020
I am totally adding this quiz to my long to do list tomorrow. https://t.co/Tkf52btHwq — Angie Mentink (@AngieMentink) November 26, 2020
It's the face right here that's k1lling me😭 she really ain't wanna know pic.twitter.com/jq6a23kxst — Zayn thee™💞 (@medoreeya) November 26, 2020
It’s not the first time a turkey neck has caused that kind of confusion, but this young boy’s reaction was a little more extreme.
They should all be thankful they don’t have to see another turkey neck until Christmas.
READ MORE
This Grandma served her Thanksgiving coronavirus advice with a side of savage burn
Source @akbar_gbaja Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-11-26--This Maradona takedown of Peter Shilton is also a little genius

Tributes have been paid all around the world to one of the greatest footballers ever , Diego Maradona .
It @ @ @ @ @ that many newspapers chose his infamous ‘ hand of God ’ moment from the 1986 @ @ @ @ @ their front page picture .
And the injustice of it all still burns for the @ @ @ @ @ Shilton , We mention this because of what Maradona had to say about Shilton , @ @ @ @ @ on Twitter .
And here it is in close-up .
And just in case you @ @ @ @ @ BeardedGenius over on Twitter here .

News
Tributes have been paid all around the world to one of the greatest footballers ever, Diego Maradona.
It was only to be expected that many newspapers chose his infamous ‘hand of God’ moment from the 1986 World Cup in Mexico as their front page picture.
And the injustice of it all still burns for the then England goalie, Peter Shilton,
(via @TimGatt)
We mention this because of what Maradona had to say about Shilton, highlighted by @BeardedGenius over on Twitter.
For balance, this is how Maradona summed up Shilton in his book pic.twitter.com/kjrNJvBedr — Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) November 26, 2020
And here it is in close-up.
And just in case you were wondering.
For those asking what ‘thermos-head’ means, there’s a glossary of sorts pic.twitter.com/sPIPKSyulQ — Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) November 26, 2020
“Thermos head”. Get that trending next time he pipes up. — BeldamLascar (@BeldamLascar) November 26, 2020
Follow @BeardedGenius over on Twitter here.
READ MORE
Love this anecdote about ex-England goalie Peter Shilton’s useless motivational speech
Source @BeardedGenius


thepoke--2020-11-26--Our 18 favourite messages to Rudy Giuliani after he left his Twitter DMs open

You ’ d think a top lawyer and politician would have more sense than to leave their Twitter DMs open @ @ @ @ @ that the lawyer in question is Rudy ‘ Four Seasons Total Landscaping ’ Giuliani , @ @ @ @ @ .
As soon as Twitter spotted his rookie error , people took advantage – and @ @ @ @ @

Weird World
You’d think a top lawyer and politician would have more sense than to leave their Twitter DMs open, but when you know that the lawyer in question is Rudy ‘Four Seasons Total Landscaping’ Giuliani, it starts to make sense.
Rudy Giuliani's DMs are open, have a good time — Jennifer C. Martin (@notreallyjcm) November 22, 2020
As soon as Twitter spotted his rookie error, people took advantage – and we collected some favourites.
1.
2.
Rudy Giuliani's DMs are open. pic.twitter.com/uLuePAnyMC — Sooz "Princess Nut Nuts" Kempner (@SoozUK) November 22, 2020
3.
fingers crossed i get an answer on this one pic.twitter.com/brPedBnoTW — beth (@bethbourdon) November 22, 2020
4.
I wish 16 year old Stangle in AP government could see me now pic.twitter.com/RCJf5rznHu — Stangle’s Kid (@lisasaurstomp) November 22, 2020
5.
very pleased to hear this, I had a pressing question pic.twitter.com/JPSCvnnNxd — Gareth Dennis (@GarethDennis) November 23, 2020
6.
7.
8.
I will thank you pic.twitter.com/nVLk0ZTh80 — PER EXCRABIMENTS (@tonygoldmark) November 23, 2020
9.


thepoke--2020-11-26--‘Anti-maskers throughout history’ is a hilarious takedown of the covidiot tendency

Comedy group , The Homo Sapien Experience , have come up with their very funny take on how people with @ @ @ @ @ behaved at various points during history .
It ’ s funny – and oh so @ @ @ @ @ think they ’ d have died out by now .
You can follow the guys @ @ @ @ @ YouTube and Instagram for more comedy gold .
‘ I really don ’ t understand @ @ @ @ @

Science
Comedy group, The Homo Sapien Experience, have come up with their very funny take on how people with an anti-mask tendency might have behaved at various points during history.
It’s funny – and oh so true.
You’d think they’d have died out by now.
You can follow the guys on Twitter, Facebook, YouTube and Instagram for more comedy gold.
READ MORE
‘I really don’t understand the logic of anti-maskers’
Source The Homo Sapien Experience Image Screengrab