thepoke--2020-06-25--These Florida women refusing to wear masks win facepalm of the week

Pretty much everyone agrees that face masks can only help in the battle to stop the spread of coronavirus and @ @ @ @ @ say ‘ pretty much ’ everyone because some people don ’ t agree .
And @ @ @ @ @ really don ’ t agree after they were made mandatory where they live .
It @ @ @ @ @ – and rather terrifying – watch .
And there ’ s more ( if you @ @ @ @ @ If ever a single sign summed up where we are right now then it ’ @ @

Videos
Pretty much everyone agrees that face masks can only help in the battle to stop the spread of coronavirus and help save lives.
We say ‘pretty much’ everyone because some people don’t agree. And these Florida women really, really don’t agree after they were made mandatory where they live.
It’s a very funny – and rather terrifying – watch.
Floridians angrily claiming masks are the work of the devil because “they want to throw God’s wonderful breathing system out the door.” pic.twitter.com/5pDzU8ncwY — John Aravosis 🇺🇸🇬🇷🏳🌈 (@aravosis) June 24, 2020
Facepalm of the week.
https://twitter.com/cmclymer/status/1275931946745499648?s=20
If they are so confident that god will take care of them, they should sign a waiver that they refuse medical care should they become sick. Save ventilators and ICU beds for people who weren’t selfish and stupid. — Corvin Esque🏳🌈 (@Corvinesque) June 24, 2020
Now this, kids, is what happens when you let stupid off his leash to make baby stupids with all the other stupids in the neighbourhood. https://t.co/WJioQMyvda — Stephen McGann (@StephenMcGann) June 24, 2020
The thing is, I doubt these women just made this stuff up out of thin air. Someone TOLD them that masks are dangerous. Someone told them that masks fly in the face of “God’s will.” Is this a Republican thing, a Fox News thing, a Trump thing, a church thing, or what? — John Aravosis 🇺🇸🇬🇷🏳🌈 (@aravosis) June 24, 2020
Wow. This is so batshit crazy it’s like a comedy skit. https://t.co/mHR7VwxHgo — Richard Marx (@richardmarx) June 24, 2020
And there’s more (if you can stand it).
Oh my. Here’s the rest of the testimony of the first woman. She appears to be alluding to Pizzagate, among other far-right conspiracy theories. pic.twitter.com/J10IB3AXTY — John Aravosis 🇺🇸🇬🇷🏳🌈 (@aravosis) June 24, 2020
To conclude …
"They want to throw God's wonderful breathing system out the door" This is so scary. It's not just that people are thick, it's that they're so sure experts are the thick ones. It's what happens when facts are treated as subjective opinions, and everything needs to have two sides https://t.co/A0f0dpQfOn — Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) June 25, 2020
And this.
What a time to be alive. https://t.co/yp26i4ku4y — Zach Braff (@zachbraff) June 24, 2020
READ MORE
If ever a single sign summed up where we are right now then it’s this
Source @aravosis


thepoke--2020-06-25--Hamilton star Leslie Odom Jr. hilariously shows why you shouldn’t swear near toddlers

It ’ s nice to know that when it comes to parenting , the talented and famous have the same problems as the rest of us .
This video shared on Instagram by actress and singer , Nicolette Robinson , of her musical theatre star husband Leslie Odom Jr. as he read to their three-year-old daughter Lucille Ruby , is a perfect illustration of one giant pitfall for parents .
Kids , eh !
You can say “ Mama ” and “ Dada ” to them a hundred times and they ’ ll ignore you , but say “ F*ck @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Leslie , scubagirl22031 wasn ’ t able to stifle her laughter when a similar thing happened .
“ Once , in the grocery store , my very young son started in with a very loud and repeated imitation of me saying , “ Goddammit !
” I couldn ’ t help but laugh so then he kept saying it to the point where I was shushing him and trying to cover his mouth with my hand while tears ran down my face from laughter .
It was the worst reaction I could have @ @ @ @ @ @ @ was hysterical .
Oh my goodness , it still kills me and it ’ s been at least 5 years.
” Here ’ s Lucille Ruby ’ s talented dad in action in the soon-to-be-released film version of Lin-Manuel Miranda ‘ s hit musical , Hamilton .
Witness a cockatoo let rip with a tsunami of f-words when its owner smashes a birdcage

Videos
It’s nice to know that when it comes to parenting, the talented and famous have the same problems as the rest of us.
This video shared on Instagram by actress and singer, Nicolette Robinson, of her musical theatre star husband Leslie Odom Jr. as he read to their three-year-old daughter Lucille Ruby, is a perfect illustration of one giant pitfall for parents.
“You have to stop doing naughty!”
Excellent advice from Lucille Ruby.
Kids, eh! You can say “Mama” and “Dada” to them a hundred times and they’ll ignore you, but say “F*ck” just once …
Her little pause before she drops it again 😂😂 already a comedic genius
lyndsilarose
This is my favorite thing ever.
jenncolella
😂😂😂😂😂😂 her squeals & laughter are the best!
wontuplay4me
Like Nicolette and Leslie, scubagirl22031 wasn’t able to stifle her laughter when a similar thing happened.
“Once, in the grocery store, my very young son started in with a very loud and repeated imitation of me saying, “Goddammit!” I couldn’t help but laugh so then he kept saying it to the point where I was shushing him and trying to cover his mouth with my hand while tears ran down my face from laughter. It was the worst reaction I could have had because of course he thought it was hysterical. Oh my goodness, it still kills me and it’s been at least 5 years.”
Here’s Lucille Ruby’s talented dad in action in the soon-to-be-released film version of Lin-Manuel Miranda‘s hit musical, Hamilton.
IT’S AARON BURR, SIR! Tony Award-winning actor @leslieodomjr talks about bringing "Hamilton" to fans across the country with #Hamilfilm and have them experience the hit musical in their own homes on @disneyplus. pic.twitter.com/3dzxNpgPJ6 — Good Morning America (@GMA) June 23, 2020
Bleeping amazing.
READ MORE
Witness a cockatoo let rip with a tsunami of f-words when its owner smashes a birdcage
Source Nicolette Robinson Image Screengrab, Nicolette Robinson


thepoke--2020-06-25--Stephen King had a question and Richard Osman’s answer took the biscuit

Over on Twitter Stephen King had a question about this study conducted into women , men , and cats .
@ @ @ @ @ had the perfect answer .
Which reminded us of this brilliant video of a cat @ @ @ @ @ hitting this dog .
Richard Osman asked people to sum up their lockdown in a @ @ @ @ @

Twitter
Over on Twitter Stephen King had a question about this study conducted into women, men, and cats.
According to a study conducted at Colorado State University, women are less likely to date men who like cats. One question is why that’s the case. Another, perhaps more important, is why this study was conducted in the first place. — Stephen King (@StephenKing) June 23, 2020
And Pointless guy Richard Osman had the perfect answer.
It was funded by dogs. — Richard Osman (@richardosman) June 23, 2020
Which reminded us of this brilliant video of a cat thinking long and hard before hitting this dog.
Never fails.
READ MORE
Richard Osman asked people to sum up their lockdown in a movie title – 17 favourites
Source Twitter @richardosman


thepoke--2020-06-27--This piano scale has an unexpected twist and it’s brilliant

5 seconds to make your day better .
Go !
Wonder if that was the first take ?
This video @ @ @ @ @ and crosses has a very pleasing payoff

Videos
5 seconds to make your day better. Go!
I’ve watched this tik tok approximately 500-600 times. 20/10 the perfect tik tok pic.twitter.com/h2ZgObR8f1 — RawBeautyKristi (@RawBeautyKristi) June 26, 2020
Wonder if that was the first take?
READ MORE
This video of a cat playing noughts and crosses has a very pleasing payoff
Source @RawBeautyKristi


thepoke--2020-06-27--This anti-masker’s argument was destroyed with their own logic

Most people agree that wearing a mask at certain places and times during the pandemic is a good thing .
@ @ @ @ @ and those that disagree tend to be very angry about it .
Which makes this @ @ @ @ @ own logic – all the more satisfying .
‘ That ’ s the best comeback @ @ @ @ @ the stupidest statement.
’ Owninglikenp ‘ IMO this is illustrating binary mental process where anything @ @ @ @ @ or 0 % .
Beeing able to nuance our thoughts on anything allow us to @ @ @ @ @

Popular
Most people agree that wearing a mask at certain places and times during the pandemic is a good thing.
Not everyone, however, and those that disagree tend to be very angry about it. Which makes this takedown – destroyed with their own logic – all the more satisfying.
Owned.
‘That’s the best comeback I’ve seen to the stupidest statement.’ Owninglikenp ‘IMO this is illustrating binary mental process where anything is either 100% true/working or 0%. Beeing able to nuance our thoughts on anything allow us to be more relevant.’ wanabes2
READ MORE
Takedown of the day
Source Reddit u/deannathedford Image Pexels


thepoke--2020-06-27--Takedown of the day

Takedown of the day

Over on Twitter someone called @ briandunord someone pointed out how much better parts of Europe are coping with coronavirus @ @ @ @ @ prompted this fellow American to stand up for Trump ’ s record by pointing out @ @ @ @ @ is .
And the comeback was perfect .
‘ Percentages are just so confusing , @ @ @ @ @ the exchange on Reddit .
Although , it should be added , it eventually ended @ @ @ @ @ Well , not exactly handshakes , obviously .

Twitter
Over on Twitter someone called @BrianduNord someone pointed out how much better parts of Europe are coping with coronavirus than the US.
Which prompted this fellow American to stand up for Trump’s record by pointing out how much bigger the US is.
And the comeback was perfect.
‘Percentages are just so confusing,’ said beerbellybegone who shared the exchange on Reddit.
Although, it should be added, it eventually ended with handshakes all round. Well, not exactly handshakes, obviously.
well that’s one way to shut his ass up — Ozzie (@MatrixWasADocu) June 25, 2020
You’re not going to shut me up, I simply said the pure numbers are misleading and in all actuality per capita is a better standardization which shows that the more densely populated country as said previously, has a high death rate per capita for the corona virus — Ryan Mays (@TheMaysShow29) June 25, 2020
It’s like 500 per million versus 370 per million, of course I also recognize that that death rate could be an indicator of more adequate resources or a younger population overall that doesn’t die but is still infected at a higher rate… — Ryan Mays (@TheMaysShow29) June 25, 2020
Going on per million is also a stat that will be a pretty bad comparison in about a month as the virus is now spiking across the nation instead of just nyc, Boston and Seattle. I get what you’re saying, the actual number right now isn’t wildly worse, but it will be very soon. — sabres doomer (@BrianduNord) June 25, 2020
Very true, sorry if I can off as any bit rude, not trying to, I love stats and do recognize that depending on the stat used, the picture can change. Regardless think, the U.S. handled this incorrectly from the start. — Ryan Mays (@TheMaysShow29) June 25, 2020
Absolutely and no worries, the velocity of the change is what is alarming to me, and this long after the virus first came, which shows how badly Americans are at this. — sabres doomer (@BrianduNord) June 25, 2020
In short …
This would be wholesome if weren’t all finna die — loselose (@jesuisnguyen) June 26, 2020
READ MORE
Simply 6 very satisfying takedowns of ‘anti-maskers’
Source Reddit u/beerbellybegone


thepoke--2020-06-26--Simply 6 very satisfying takedowns of ‘anti-maskers’

Most people agree that masks are a good thing to help prevent coronavirus .
But some people really don ’ @ @ @ @ @ despite the benefits for them ( and everyone else ) .
And the people who @ @ @ @ @ have a tendency to get really angry about it .
Fortunately there are also people @ @ @ @ @ sometimes in the most satisfying way .
And you can read half a dozen more @ @ @ @ @ of Someecards .
These Florida women refusing to wear masks win facepalm of the week

Weird World
Most people agree that masks are a good thing to help prevent coronavirus.
But some people really don’t want to wear them despite the benefits for them (and everyone else).
And the people who don’t like them have a tendency to get really angry about it. Fortunately there are also people to put them right, sometimes in the most satisfying way.
1.
(via)
2.
(via)
3.
(via)
4.
(via)
5.
(via)
6.
(via)
And you can read half a dozen more collected by the good people of Someecards.
READ MORE
These Florida women refusing to wear masks win facepalm of the week
Source Someecards Image Pixabay


thepoke--2020-06-26--Museums are competing to find out who’s got the best bum and it’s a cheeky delight

It ’ s always a pleasure when museums start playing a friendly ( but intensely competitive ) game of oneupmanship @ @ @ @ @ trolling each other with their best ducks and it ’ s quacking brilliant

Pics
It’s always a pleasure when museums start playing a friendly (but intensely competitive) game of oneupmanship on Twitter.
And today’s theme is …
IT’S TIME FOR #CURATORBATTLE!💥 Today’s theme is #BestMuseumBum! This cracking Roman marble statuette depicts an athlete at the peak of fitness! It may have decorated the town house of one of Eboracum’s wealthier residents. Has someone taken a bite out of this 🍑? BEAT THAT!💥 pic.twitter.com/N3A6KYz339 — Yorkshire Museum (@YorkshireMuseum) June 26, 2020
BUMFIGHT!
1.
Oh butt you haven't seen ours yet. We thought we'd take a crack at this week's #CURATORBATTLE with these peaches @AngleseyAbbey #BestMuseumBum. We can confirm that bottom dusting is an important part of our conservation work. pic.twitter.com/U5LZITXWPp — National Trust in the East (@East_England_NT) June 26, 2020
2.
Turns out we have a lot of bums and bottoms in our collections. 🍑 In the end we decided on two of our oldest so here is the approx. 3,500 year old bum of Egyptian deity Bes and this delightful Peruvian whistle pot bottom from 1350-1500. 😏#CuratorBattle #BestMuseumBum pic.twitter.com/UlD74WedJc — Aberdeen Uni Museums and Special Collections (@uoacollections) June 26, 2020
3.
Is it getting hot in here, or is it just me? This Valentine’s Day card was sold at Fenwick’s department store in York in 1987. Although printed with I LOVE YOU inside, this copy was never sent… I would have kept it for myself too. #BestMuseumBum #CuratorBattle pic.twitter.com/GOBF8NKPwx — York Castle Museum (@YorkCastle) June 26, 2020
4.
💥 #BestMuseumBum themed #CURATORBATTLE today💥 The Cowdray Engraving shows the sinking of the Mary Rose during the Battle of the Solent. Turns out is also shows a lot of Tudor bums! Our top pick is this sassy gentleman by @Southsea_Castle, he knows he's rocking his breeches! pic.twitter.com/18wgio1bKl — The Mary Rose (@MaryRoseMuseum) June 26, 2020
5.
In honour of #NIW2020 we submit the Bumblebee (Bombus sp.) for this weeks #CURATORBATTLE #bestmuseumbum though floofiest (technical term) bum must surely go to the Bee Hawkmoth (Hemaris tityus) #EntoAtHome #insects #minibeasts pic.twitter.com/zRNj2NBkNz — Grant Museum of Zoology (@GrantMuseum) June 26, 2020
6.
"You can look but you can't touch it
If you touch it
I'm a start some drama." This sentiment was sadly ignored in the case of this figure. You see the shiny, flattened 🍑? That's because people couldn't resist touching her hump (hump). 🙄#BestMuseumBum #CURATORBATTLE pic.twitter.com/7Pb0hZJRZI — Museum of Oxford (@MuseumofOxford) June 26, 2020
7.
We raise your athlete and instead give you the bum of a drunken fish. Yes you heard me. Made by Pamela Mei Yee Leung, it was part of a body of work which married animals and humans together to create mythological creatures with personalities. #BestMuseumBum #CuratorBattle pic.twitter.com/qUAa3NgGcG — York Art Gallery (@YorkArtGallery) June 26, 2020
8.
Zeus’s bottom is always a real crowd-pleaser, too. This bronze cast of a statue of the Greek god dates back to c.470 BC, and is about 2 metres tall #CURATORBATTLE pic.twitter.com/t8TNdhwvhD — Ashmolean Museum (@AshmoleanMuseum) June 26, 2020
9.
Rugby Changing Room, Carmarthen by Ken Etheridge (1959)#CuratorBattle pic.twitter.com/kLywma8HUY — World Rugby Museum (@wrugbymuseum) June 26, 2020
10.
Now THIS is the #CuratorBattle we've been waiting for… Say hello to our #BestMuseumBum courtesy of our anatomical model! What a lovely 🍑, and educational as well 🤓 pic.twitter.com/Z151HzKGzQ — The Old Operating Theatre Museum & Herb Garret (@OldOpTheatre) June 26, 2020
11.
We don't wanna be the butt of any jokes this #CURATORBATTLE, cause our entry is pants. Literally. 🩲 With no #BestMuseumBum, here's the closest thing! Part of some 3,500 year old underpants, excavated in Thebes & made to protect your 🍑 Can you spot them on the tomb paintings? pic.twitter.com/FLsctrfqXg — National Leather Collection (@museumofleather) June 26, 2020
12.
From the Huddersfield Art Gallery collection, we give you this painting by Henry Scott Tuke (1858-1929). It's titled 'The Blue Jacket' because that's obviously what the artist was focusing on… #BestMuseumBum #CURATORBATTLE pic.twitter.com/hmgBwjFvwV — Hudds Art Gallery (@HuddsArtGallery) June 26, 2020
13.
Not only do we have a competitor for #BestMuseumBum but it's a working bum, listed in our collections database as a storm drain/tunnel with "bum for scale". Photographer Alf Gentle was clearly ahead of his time. pic.twitter.com/fKe73VY0HE — St Albans Museums (@stalbansmuseums) June 26, 2020
14.
This bum? It’s not just any bum. This is the behind of the Egyptian god of fertility, Min, dating back to c. 3300 BC – a 5,000 year old bum. #CURATORBATTLE Photo courtesy of the brilliant @museumbums pic.twitter.com/DMWAhu1FbT — Ashmolean Museum (@AshmoleanMuseum) June 26, 2020
15.
How about the stunning 'Chrysis' car mascot, designed by Rene Jules Lalique, 1931. What a glass. #bestmuseumbum #curatorbattle pic.twitter.com/8aluSbh9Oa — Beaulieu_Hants (@Beaulieu_Hants) June 26, 2020
16.
Another #CURATORBATTLE Etty for #BestMuseumBum today, this time 'Man Lying Face Down'. We like to think he's just been to the freezer and realised he ate the last Cornetto last night. And that he can't get the drawer back in and that the whole freezer needs defrosting ☀ pic.twitter.com/7pJ9gfTVdN — Scarborough Museums (@SMTrust) June 26, 2020
17.
For today’s #CURATORBATTLE (or perhaps #CURATORREBUTTAL?) theme of #BestMuseumBum, we present Hercules knocking it out of the park… A work by the goldsmith Francesco Pomarano, this boxwood statuette was already a celebrated piece in the #sixteenthcentury.#WallaceFromHome pic.twitter.com/3LoD6JkIOa — Wallace Collection (@WallaceMuseum) June 26, 2020
18.
‘Best Bum 2 for 1! And larger than life. Lady Godiva on Horseback by John Thomas 1861.’ #BestMuseumBum #curatorbattle pic.twitter.com/aaYLGEMUuO — Maidstone Museum (@MaidstoneMuseum) June 26, 2020
19.
Same derriere, different decade You can track Henry VIII's burgeoning bottom through our collection of his combat armours. The Tudor tubster went from a modest 32in waist in 1520 to a whopping 51in booty by 1540. A 60% increase in trunk junk 🍑 pic.twitter.com/vpx9mQyCpA — Royal Armouries (@Royal_Armouries) June 26, 2020
READ MORE
Museums are trolling each other with their best ducks and it’s quacking brilliant
Source @YorkshireMuseum


thepoke--2020-06-26--This video of a cat playing noughts and crosses has a very pleasing payoff

Chances are you might have seen this clip already but if any video merits repeated viewing , then surely it @ @ @ @ @ Toto ’ s unexpectedly dramatic cameo is just the distraction we needed today

Videos
Chances are you might have seen this clip already but if any video merits repeated viewing, then surely it’s this one.
Brilliant.
what a sore loser pic.twitter.com/FvupvsHVZj — kheer (@iqraanabi) March 16, 2020
update: a wild taz spotted in a tree pic.twitter.com/na7usMnoK4 — kheer (@iqraanabi) March 16, 2020
I tried…….. but it works different with bunnies… pic.twitter.com/NCwg6MKnIW — NagatoPyon (@Nagato_Pyon) March 16, 2020
READ MORE
Toto’s unexpectedly dramatic cameo is just the distraction we needed today
Source Twitter @iqraanabi


thepoke--2020-06-26--The 25 funniest things we’ve seen this week

Simply twenty-five of the funniest things we ’ ve spotted on Twitter over the past week – and not a @ @ @ @

Pics
Simply twenty-five of the funniest things we’ve spotted on Twitter over the past week – and not a word about coronavirus.
1.
I don’t think there’s a Punjabi word for ‘purring’ so when our cat purrs, my parents say ‘billi da motor chalda’ (the cat’s motor is revving). — J.S. (@JasminderSidhu) June 23, 2020
2.
Being married is weird, isn’t it?
My husband would give me a kidney if I needed one, but won’t walk into the kitchen to fetch me some crisps. — Twinks (@tinytwink) June 19, 2020
3.
My partner did not know tunas were really big and I asked why he thought they were small and he said “they come in such little cans” — Cat "Herine" Graffam (@catgraffam) June 20, 2020
4.
America has just gotten Lidl- for too long they've had to go to separate stores to buys fresh oranges, gilets, wine, foot baths, picnic baskets, boxes of CHAKOLAT bars, pyjamas, tents, mini hoovers, fresh bread, CRANCH KRIZPIEES, bee-keeping masks & unicycles. I wish them well. — Aisling Bea (@WeeMissBea) June 22, 2020
5.
I told my kid he mustn’t use the word ‘hate’ as it’s hurtful and mean and then I made absolutely sure he apologised to the cheese — Friney ☕🌷 (@dimplesticks) June 22, 2020
6.
Why does Venice, Italy look like Patrick needing water pic.twitter.com/Py1WWhnMoI — Tron Madden (@madden_tron) June 21, 2020
7.
8.
I cleaned pee off the floor and glitter off the sink. Not sure if I have kids or raves. — Kerry on Wayward Son (@EmissaryKerry) June 21, 2020
9.
did you hear what pirates favourite online learning tool is? it’s webinarrrrghs — Mollie Goodfellow (@hansmollman) June 22, 2020
10.
There was a young man
From Cork who got Limericks
And Haikus confused — GaryTwisted at Twisted by Design (@GaryTwisted) June 22, 2020
11.
I found out the other day that "penguin" in Mandarin Chinese is literally "business goose" and I haven't been able to think about anything else since. pic.twitter.com/6umgLATciQ — Stu Nugent (@CrookedNuts) June 25, 2020
12.


thepoke--2020-06-26--A Twitter play in three acts

A Twitter play in three acts

Museums are competing to find out who 's got the best bum and it 's a cheeky delight

Twitter
A Twitter play in three acts.
‘LMAO’ said @ultimate_hiss who went wildly viral after sharing these screenshots on Twitter.
Source Twitter @ultimate_hiss


thepoke--2020-06-26--Our 12 favourite hot takes on the pandemic’s progress

You could be forgiven for thinking that the coronavirus crisis had ended , judging by the packed beaches and street @ @ @ @ @ ’ t , and these people had some thoughts to share on the matter .
@ @ @ @ @ saying about the new normal

Twitter
You could be forgiven for thinking that the coronavirus crisis had ended, judging by the packed beaches and street parties.
But it hasn’t, and these people had some thoughts to share on the matter.
1.
It’s weird that so many people are out and about when the message was quite clearly ‘Go out if you like but do stay in if you can. But don’t go out. Unless you want to; then you can. Otherwise stay in. Unless you’re going out’. — Huw (@ed_son) June 25, 2020
2.
My furloughed housemate coming in for some casual 4pm chit-chat pic.twitter.com/PFKfNGb4al — mitch (@limitedmitch) June 24, 2020
3.
I hate covid. I miss peeking around a wall with my friends, our heads inexplicably stacked on top of each other in order to stealthily see what is going on nearby. — CHAZ michael murray (@ldrinkh20) June 24, 2020
4.
The worst part about being home with kids is looking at the clock to see if it's almost their bedtime and discovering it's not even 8 AM yet. — Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) June 25, 2020
5.
6.
Covid making funny hat day at work just kinda horrifying actually pic.twitter.com/luqJn9whSL — Angry Gay Yeehaw (@RealDorianDawes) June 25, 2020
7.
I can sit in a car with a divorced dad but I can’t go and hug my mum https://t.co/rBO3lgKQoI — Mollie Goodfellow (@hansmollman) June 25, 2020
8.
“Mummy, the scary Coronavirus didn’t kill us off” “Don’t worry darling, I have a fun day out planned where we can all get… SKIN CANCER!” “Yaaaaay!” “And maybe also CORONAVIRUS!” “YAAAAAY!” – Britain, apparently. — Mitten d'Amour (@MittenDAmour) June 25, 2020
9.
Not heard Boris described in *quite* that way before. Futherhencemorth, He shall be referred to as 'The Whitehall Blob'. pic.twitter.com/cAMq2oQ7y3 — helen ayres (@Raphaelite_Girl) June 25, 2020
10.
lucifer: your flock is dying god [throwing up hands] I gave them masks but they refuse to wear them lucifer: free will lol — *sigh*clops (@aotakeo) June 25, 2020
11.
You know what, these scenes of people soberly cramming themselves onto packed beaches are making me feel so optimistic about social distancing when everyone’s off their tits next week. — James Felton (@JimMFelton) June 25, 2020
12.
If Slipknot can wear a mask for a full set than you can wear a mask for your trip to Target!! — VAL (@XMaloVidaX) June 25, 2020
READ MORE
10 funny things people are saying about the new normal
Image @ed_son, Screengrab


thepoke--2020-06-26--Duncan Jones shared a compilation of David Bowie ‘funny moments’ and it’s just the ticket

Director Duncan Jones shared a compilation of some of his dad David Bowie ’ s ‘ funny moments ’ and @ @ @ @ @

Videos
Director Duncan Jones shared a compilation of some of his dad David Bowie’s ‘funny moments’ and it cheered everyone up.
Was missing dad tonight. This cheered me right up. He was a silly sausage. 😂https://t.co/O7Kr8SwRAv — Duncan Jones (@ManMadeMoon) June 26, 2020
We’re with this person.
That laugh and smile could — and did! — light up the entire earth. Thanks for sharing him with us, Duncan. — Sam Dykstra (@Sam_Dykstra) June 26, 2020
Follow Duncan on Twitter here.
Source @manmademoon


thepoke--2020-06-26--Donald Trump was asked his 2nd term priorities and it’s even crazier written down

Here ’ s Donald Trump on Fox News asked what his priorities would be if Vladimir Putin was to win @ @ @ @ @ president ( we paraphrase , obviously ) .
And his answer really is worth listening @ @ @ @ @ This happened a bit later and it definitely belongs in the same bracket .

Videos
Here’s Donald Trump on Fox News asked what his priorities would be if Vladimir Putin was to win him a second term as president (we paraphrase, obviously).
And his answer really is worth listening to in full because …
Asked what his top priorities for a second term are, Trump can’t name a single thing pic.twitter.com/fF6xXaDAy0 — Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) June 26, 2020
It’s even scarier written down.
(via @ddale8)
My IQ dropped reading that — Trumpy Trumpy (parody) (@outofcontroljb) June 26, 2020
I am starting to get a distinct sense he doesn't want a 2nd term — Shelly (@SheldonL436) June 26, 2020
Is this for real???? The transcripts of his speech are insane. It sounds bad when you hear it, but it’s just batshit crazy on paper. — ProudOKLiiberal🌊☮❤🎶🇺🇸🗽 (@williamd1949) June 26, 2020
This happened a bit later and it definitely belongs in the same bracket.
Trump still hasn’t figured out that World Wars 1 and 2 weren’t contagious diseases (also the troops who fought those wars voted by mail) pic.twitter.com/AmjS568unB — Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) June 26, 2020
Source @atrupar


thepoke--2020-06-26--The Brits are melting – our 14 favourite funny reactions to the heatwave

The last few days have seen the UK experiencing temperatures into the 30s with high humidity and not much wind @ @ @ @ @ hotter .
As you ’ ve probably seen , thousands flocked to the beach , @ @ @ @ @ a major incident at Bournemouth , but most people stayed home and complained about the @ @ @ @ @ fashion .
These were our favourite reactions .
Larry the Downing Street cat , or @ @ @ @ @ , shared this unique way of gauging the level of the heatwave .
If you @ @ @ @ @ people hiding from the sunshine , Tomasz Schafernaker has some good news .
And then @ @ @ @ @ the rain .
It started raining during a TV news report about the heatwave and @ @ @ @ @ British Thing™

Twitter
The last few days have seen the UK experiencing temperatures into the 30s with high humidity and not much wind, making it feel even hotter.
As you’ve probably seen, thousands flocked to the beach, leading to the declaration of a major incident at Bournemouth, but most people stayed home and complained about the weather, in time-honoured British fashion.
These were our favourite reactions.
1.
Blimey it’s hot today. Anyone checked in on Prince Andrew? — Ava-Santina (@AvaSantina) June 25, 2020
2.
Just changed my bed in 26° heat. Where’s my fucking medal? — Bethany Black (@BeffernieBlack) June 25, 2020
3.
It’s too hot to think or sleep, everyone feels isolated and angry and all I can see on here is people bullying each other in various ways, both loud and quiet. I feel like I’m in a Tennessee Williams play. — Liz Buckley (@liz_buckley) June 26, 2020
4.
Sheesh! It’s muggy out there today… pic.twitter.com/YbMuNEt4Hx — Robin Flavell (@RobinFlavell) June 25, 2020
5.
6.
It's not officially a heat wave until NHS catering and management start handing these out in hospitals pic.twitter.com/ocyaFVqXOa — Dr Philip Lee (@drphiliplee1) June 25, 2020
7.
How do people in hot countries get anything done? — Paul (@bingowings14) June 25, 2020
8.
A Brit, upon seeing someone who is quite clearly melting in the heat, someone who is wilting like spinach, is dripping with sweat, toasting like crumpets and glowing like molten rock, will be unable to resist asking the question: “bit warm?” — VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) June 25, 2020
9.
it is the temperature of a WARM SUMMER’S DAY but it is the MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT and I am SWEATING and FURIOUS. — Michael Chakraverty (@mschakraverty) June 24, 2020
10.
I’ve got a fan on but it’s not making ANY difference. Admittedly, it’s a fan oven. #Heatwave — Sarah O'Connell (@SarahO_Connell) June 26, 2020
11.
One of my neighbours has a fire burning. It’s like wearing a coat in hell. pic.twitter.com/Af7VBNjJvL — Neil Friday McGourty (@Mcgourty22N) June 25, 2020
12.
Everyone banging on about SWEATING have obviously never heard of a fridge tent, which is where I'll be hiding until about October…. pic.twitter.com/qj5MwDnGPO — Fergal Lovelength (@FLLVLTH) June 25, 2020
13.
You say #heatwave Britain, I say hay fever and sweaty bollocks pic.twitter.com/SNQ39D4xaR — Cumberdick Benderbatch (@CumberdickB) June 23, 2020
14.
If a Snowman could come spoon me, that’d be great 😰#cantsleep #heatwaveuk — Charlotte (@Charlotte_x91) June 25, 2020
Larry the Downing Street cat, or at least his parody version, shared this unique way of gauging the level of the heatwave.
Must be a hot day – Boris Johnson’s afternoon nap was 5 hours instead of the usual 4. — Larry the Cat (@Number10cat) June 25, 2020
If you’re one of the people hiding from the sunshine, Tomasz Schafernaker has some good news.
#heatwave… a few thunderstorms today, then MORE widely⚡tomoz & Saturday. A big COOL DOWN this weekend💨❄🌦 pic.twitter.com/s2aVLwuu48 — Tomasz Schafernaker (@Schafernaker) June 25, 2020
And then we can all complain about the rain.
READ MORE
It started raining during a TV news report about the heatwave and it’s a Very British Thing™
Image @FLLVLTH


thepoke--2020-06-26--‘Someone in our town has done this’

‘Someone in our town has done this’

This has raised the bar for homeschooling parents everywhere .
‘ Someone in our town has done this , ’ @ @ @ @ @ Annjj – on Twitter .
And lots of other people shared their own efforts .
@ @ @ @ @ bears on a rollercoaster is the content we needed today

Pics
This has raised the bar for homeschooling parents everywhere.
‘Someone in our town has done this,’ said Flanjo – or @Annjj – on Twitter.
And lots of other people shared their own efforts.
Us too😂🦒👍I can’t imagine taking him down! Everyone smiles at him walking past, it’s so lovely to see😀 pic.twitter.com/pFJJeFpRje — Elaine Wilkinson (@1234elainewilki) June 25, 2020
We done similar in April pic.twitter.com/4HLgo6FYE1 — Dan Mac ⚓ (@dannymac80) June 25, 2020
Did this the other year pic.twitter.com/6apTD5nHeB — Nick Smith (@nicksmith) June 25, 2020
READ MORE
This video of 22 teddy bears on a rollercoaster is the content we needed today
Source @annjj


thepoke--2020-06-26--Rosanne Barr called Trump “the first woman President of the United States” – 9 utterly bewildered re

Rosanne Barr called Trump “the first woman President of the United States” – 9 utterly bewildered responses

Die-hard Trump fan Roseanne Barr lost her TV show in 2018 after making racist comments , and we haven ’ @ @ @ @ @ since .
After watching this new video , we kind of wish we still hadn @ @ @ @ @ ’ t the only ones baffled by her bizarre pronouncement .
But this seems more @ @ @ @ @ sacked for being racist : the 18 funniest tweets

Videos
Die-hard Trump fan Roseanne Barr lost her TV show in 2018 after making racist comments, and we haven’t heard much from her since.
After watching this new video, we kind of wish we still hadn’t.
Wait …what? He’s the what?
We weren’t the only ones baffled by her bizarre pronouncement.
1.
you could spend 1,000 years guessing how this video ends and you’d still never come close to getting it right https://t.co/ikui711sSd — david ehrlich (@davidehrlich) June 25, 2020
2.
I would like to spend the rest of 2020 on whatever Rosanne is on… pic.twitter.com/0aYRtt8AUU — Evan DeSimone (@Smorgasboredom) June 25, 2020
3.
Great pairing for Cards Against Humanity — Angie 🌋⚒🦕 (@hugtherocks) June 25, 2020
4.
5.
Is she complimenting him or insulting him?!? pic.twitter.com/fnmQilDvol — Anne – wear a damn mask 🇨🇦🏳🌈👩🔬🧬🩸 (@in_my_opinion76) June 25, 2020
6.
No one could hit this curveball — philz (@RyanPhillippe) June 25, 2020
7.
You were right. This is some monkeys-typing-Hamlet-level shit. https://t.co/qTAN2Bisxn — Rich Sommer (@richsommer) June 25, 2020
8.
I actually tried to guess it. I did not guess it. — Helen Kennedy (@HelenKennedy) June 25, 2020
9.
Is there a German word for "The Frustration One Feels When There Is Nothing Left To Cancel." https://t.co/Os8scQG7vk — Bryan Suits KFI AM640 (@darksecretplace) June 25, 2020
Someone named @13wildhare thought they’d cracked the code.
it’s the vulva neck, isn’t it? pic.twitter.com/AIpiJRQQdU — glasses braces dorko (@13wildhare) June 25, 2020
But this seems more likely.
Written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan — Evan DeSimone (@Smorgasboredom) June 25, 2020
READ MORE
Roseanne Barr was sacked for being racist: the 18 funniest tweets
Source @lanadeljj Image Screengrab @lanadeljj


thepoke--2020-06-28--Surely the greatest news story you’ll watch today

This news report about two men who got into trouble after taking an unscheduled trip down Dublin ’ s River @ @ @ @ @ spent .
This piano scale has an unexpected twist and it ’ s brilliant

Videos
This news report about two men who took an unscheduled trip down Dublin’s River Liffey is two minutes very well spent.
Without a doubt RTÉ’s greatest news report ever. Gets better and better at every single turn. pic.twitter.com/G3QFlkds8M — David Connors (@peterswellman) June 27, 2020
Can’t wait for the sequel.
Paul Reynolds is now my favorite TV reporter.
Stay with this until he tags out. https://t.co/VyJYNTYBmD — Charles P. Pierce (@CharlesPPierce) June 28, 2020
A masterpiece — Sarah-Jane Murphy (@sjanemurf) June 27, 2020
Just insanely, unimprovably Irish stuff here https://t.co/3prP1ksPMY — Mark O'Connell (@mrkocnnll) June 27, 2020
Fair dues to the reporter for keeping a straight face — Shane Caher (@CaherShane) June 27, 2020
This deserves wider coverage https://t.co/NzGUr4OR4r — Gavin Hamilton (@GHmltn) June 27, 2020
And they say Ireland no longer has heroes — Joe O'Shea (@josefoshea) June 27, 2020
READ MORE
This piano scale has an unexpected twist and it’s brilliant
Source @peterswellman


thepoke--2020-06-29--The search is over – this is the worst on-hold music of all time

Having to wait to be put through to an adviser is bad enough , but the music some companies play @ @ @ @ @ is beyond belief .
The choice is usually between something that wouldn ’ t be @ @ @ @ @ hotel lift and popular classical clips played on such a short loop that it should @ @ @ @ @ unusual punishment .
Twitter user hsky the god has shared a recording of something that @ @ @ @ @ and we can ’ t imagine anything ever taking away its accolade of being the @ @ @ @ @ Time .
If you thought it sounded familiar , you either live near an abattoir @ @ @ @ @ this hilariously and deliberately bad version of Britney Spears ’ Toxic .
These are a @ @ @ @ @ on @ jkmb ’ s post .
This viral video of a dog singing Britney @ @ @ @ @ sense than the news right now

Twitter
Having to wait to be put through to an adviser is bad enough, but the music some companies play to “entertain” us is beyond belief.
The choice is usually between something that wouldn’t be out of place in a hotel lift and popular classical clips played on such a short loop that it should be deemed a cruel and unusual punishment.
Twitter user hsky the god has shared a recording of something that goes far beyond reason, and we can’t imagine anything ever taking away its accolade of being the Worst On-hold Music of All Time.
I'm on hold with my bank and this is the shit they are playing 😐😐 pic.twitter.com/fIobus2a38 — hsky the god (@jkmb) June 24, 2020
If you thought it sounded familiar, you either live near an abattoir or you’ve heard this hilariously and deliberately bad version of Britney Spears’ Toxic.
These are a few of our favourite comments on @jkmb’s post.
This is very funny and the replies have introduced me to SHITTYFLUTE which is also very funny. https://t.co/Ew5dd4J2B5 — Dara Ó Briain (@daraobriain) June 25, 2020
I am CRYING with laughter. I will listen to this at least a dozen more times today. https://t.co/p7e8SOUTbp — Nev Fountain (@Nevfountain) June 25, 2020
Hold music as PsyOp https://t.co/mVgFAwOqTU — Wiley Wiggins (@wileywiggins) June 27, 2020
laughed so hard i choked on my sandwich.
what the fuck is this noise? https://t.co/eada9pQvaS — 🐓The Infamous Birbman🐓 (@tokubirb) June 25, 2020
As a special “treat”, here’s Billie Eilish’s ‘Bad Guy’, shittyfluted. You’re welcome.
READ MORE
This viral video of a dog singing Britney Spears’ Toxic makes more sense than the news right now
Source hsky the god Image hsky the god, shittyflute


thepoke--2020-06-29--Kanye and Kim shared a couple of photos and people had thoughts – the 9 funniest

The Kardashians aren ’ t known for passing up the opportunity to share photos of themselves , so it was @ @ @ @ @ famous of the clan , Kim Kardashian West , shared a couple of pics of @ @ @ @ @ Their distinctive fashion statement put people in mind of quite a lot of things .
@ @ @ @ @ The very funny Darren Dutton dreamt up a new Kardashian workwear range .
Kris Jenner @ @ @ @ @ is peak technophobe mum

Twitter
The Kardashians aren’t known for passing up the opportunity to share photos of themselves, so it was no surprise when the most famous of the clan, Kim Kardashian West, shared a couple of pics of herself with hubby Kanye.
Happy Sunday pic.twitter.com/Wy75t8y1cf — Kim Kardashian West (@KimKardashian) June 28, 2020
Their distinctive fashion statement put people in mind of quite a lot of things.
These were our favourites.
1.
Jesus, they must squeak like a Spanish galleon on rough seas. https://t.co/QpdMsw6Rfx — Phlegm -I was being ironic- Clandango (@Cain_Unable) June 28, 2020
2.
3.
FOUND: near Beachy Head, 2 plastic action figures. I’m sure some kid will be missing these, breaks my heart. Please RT and help return them to their owner! 🤞 https://t.co/qyoFTcDkhL — The Bath Bird (@TheBathBird) June 28, 2020
4.
5.
Looks like they're up a log cabin in Dundee, waiting on the hot tub warming up. https://t.co/sNB6icNaDT — Fitzy 🍀 (@Fitzy_072) June 28, 2020
6.
looks like she took apart the couch and made an outfit 🤩😂 — mariah 🥀🖤 (@riahalexis) June 28, 2020
7.
Imagine them farting in this. https://t.co/as6JU0TbnT — Beckie Kathleen 🏳🌈 (@DoItWithFlareon) June 28, 2020
8.
When you turn up at Glastonbury not realising it's been cancelled pic.twitter.com/iLIf9PcR5l — SoliTrude (@Trudski2012) June 28, 2020
9.
This Matrix reboot looks whack AF https://t.co/78Jim4rclb — Stupid Sexy Corbin (@StupidSxyCorbin) June 28, 2020
The very funny Darren Dutton dreamt up a new Kardashian workwear range.
Introducing Kim Kardashian's new workwear range pic.twitter.com/VjFgEKI6jK — Darren Dutton (@Darren_Dutton) June 28, 2020
Honestly, Darren – don’t give her ideas.
READ MORE
Kris Jenner trying to broadcast Kim Kardashian is peak technophobe mum
Source Kim Kardashian West Image Kim Kardashian West


thepoke--2020-06-29--“How to second term” is the lip-synch we actually did know we needed

Donald Trump granted his good friend and devoted fan Sean Hannity an interview and the Fox News presenter asked the @ @ @ @ @ his next term .
His answer was worthy of anything Eric Cantona ever dreamt up @ @ @ @ @ sense in writing .
Then Sarah Cooper got to grips with it .
As ever @ @ @ @ @ away .
She also had a go at deciphering Trump ’ s ramble for the @ @ @ @ @ most feasible explanation we ’ ve seen .
Donald Trump ’ s embarrassing rally predictions @ @ @ @ @ lip-synch

Videos
Donald Trump granted his good friend and devoted fan Sean Hannity an interview and the Fox News presenter asked the President about his plans for his next term.
His answer was worthy of anything Eric Cantona ever dreamt up.
HANNITY: "What are your top priority items for a second term?" TRUMP: "I always say talent is more important than experience … I was in Washington I think 17 times, all of a sudden I'm the president … You don't have to drop bombs on everybody." BIDEN: Where's my ad guy? pic.twitter.com/rYwxQrJlxp — Pod Save America (@PodSaveAmerica) June 26, 2020
Right now Donald Trump and Sean Hannity are trying to out-dumbfuck each other, and they're both winning. — Palmer Report (@PalmerReport) June 26, 2020
It made no more sense in writing.
Here's the transcript of Trump's response when he was asked what are his top priorities for a second term. pic.twitter.com/XKMawRiXFs — Daniel Dale (@ddale8) June 26, 2020
Then Sarah Cooper got to grips with it.
How to second term pic.twitter.com/WTuH277sUA — Sarah Cooper (@sarahcpr) June 26, 2020
“Sean Trump” – inspired!
As ever, her interpretation blew people away.
The Trump heart on Hannity’s paper got me 😂 — Tony Posnanski (@tonyposnanski) June 26, 2020
This is the winner https://t.co/40ajqJV86x — Josh Gad (@joshgad) June 27, 2020
Wife [from another room]: How can you be laughing at that man?
Me: …
Wife: Are you listening to him again?
Me: …
Wife: Oh my God, are you watching a new @Sarahcpr without me!?
Me: You said you were busy.
Wife: NOT THAT BUSY — Elie Mystal (@ElieNYC) June 27, 2020
We were waiting for this one. We do not deserve @sarahcpr https://t.co/F9tgUg9etQ — Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) June 26, 2020
this is the only way I can stomach Trump’s interviews https://t.co/uJelpOcFFw — Arash Karami (@thekarami) June 27, 2020
She also had a go at deciphering Trump’s ramble for the rest of us.
so here's what i think happened: someone told trump to say people should vote for him cuz he has experience but that didn't square with his idea of talent vs experience so he goes on to show he didn't have experience but now he does. Still don't know why he visited DC 17 times — Sarah Cooper (@sarahcpr) June 26, 2020
The most feasible explanation we’ve seen.
READ MORE
Donald Trump’s embarrassing rally predictions are even better as a lip-synch
Source Sarah Cooper Image Sarah Cooper


thepoke--2020-06-29--An “anti-masker’s” rant about a barista earned him almost $90k in “tips”

A San Diego barista has been gifted almost $ 90,000 in tips – at the time of writing – after standing up to a customer who refused to wear a mask .
Lenin Gutierrez wanted Amber Lynn Gilles to abide by the state-mandated rules at the Clairemont branch of Starbucks where he works , but when she wouldn ’ t , he stood his ground , causing her to post a rant on Facebook .
There was even a photo of Lenin , and the address of the branch of Starbucks , both of which could have caused him a @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Lenin trouble , the post was bombarded with criticism of her selfish attitude .
She had a message for her critics .
Someone named Matt Cowan thought Lenin deserved compensation for what he ’ d had to put up with , so he set up a GoFundMe page to get him some “ tips ” .
This is what he wrote on the page .
He started with a $ 1000 goal , but kept raising it as the money rolled in .
At the last update , the goal was $ 75,000 @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Lenin took the opportunity to share his side of the story in the replies to Ms Gilles ’ post .
“ I ’ ve received numerous messages asking for my side of the story .
Since this seems to be the most popular thread I decided to post my personal experience here .
Thank you all for the love and support.
” “ I was going to show her the paper showing that we ’ ve been requiring face masks but we can still help , but before I could say anything she @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ‘ No , I don ’ t need one , ’ ” “ She started cursing up a storm , she started calling people sheep and she left , and within a few minutes she came back and she asked for my name.
” Trained dancer Lenin explained that he had been teaching children to dance before the coronavirus outbreak .
“ All I really want to be able to do is to be able to show dance to others and show how much I love it , how much it affected me @ @ @ @ @ @ @ that to somebody else , that would be amazing to change their life like it changed mine.
” After Matt ’ s GoFundMe had such an amazing response , Lenin recorded a special thank you video – in his mask , of course .
It looks like Amber Lynn Gilles won ’ t have to face him at Starbucks again – he ’ ll be too busy dancing .

Popular
A San Diego barista has been gifted almost $90,000 in tips – at the time of writing – after standing up to a customer who refused to wear a mask.
Lenin Gutierrez wanted Amber Lynn Gilles to abide by the state-mandated rules at the Clairemont branch of Starbucks where he works, but when she wouldn’t, he stood his ground, causing her to post a rant on Facebook.
There was even a photo of Lenin, and the address of the branch of Starbucks, both of which could have caused him a lot of trouble.
Far from causing Lenin trouble, the post was bombarded with criticism of her selfish attitude.
Imagine photographing someone who makes minimum wage because you won’t comply with the rules a private business and the state of California set up. Call the cops all you want, but there’s literally nothing they can do for you, Karen
Also this is creepy as hell. Get a grip.
Victoria Grace Simpson
Starbucks’ rights don’t end where your feelings begin.
Rodolfo Schulz
Are you really crying cause you had to wear a mask for 10 minutes to get coffee then leave ? Is it really that hard? Just wear the mask get your coffee then take it off when you leave Karen Jesus Christ.
Daniel Bickle
She had a message for her critics.
Someone named Matt Cowan thought Lenin deserved compensation for what he’d had to put up with, so he set up a GoFundMe page to get him some “tips”.
This is what he wrote on the page.
“Raising money for Lenin for his honorable
effort standing his ground when faced with a Karen in the wild.”
He started with a $1000 goal, but kept raising it as the money rolled in. At the last update, the goal was $75,000 and even that had been smashed.
Lenin took the opportunity to share his side of the story in the replies to Karen’s Ms Gilles’ post.
“I’ve received numerous messages asking for my side of the story. Since this seems to be the most popular thread I decided to post my personal experience here. Thank you all for the love and support.” “I was going to show her the paper showing that we’ve been requiring face masks but we can still help, but before I could say anything she flipped me off and she said, ‘No, I don’t need one,’” “She started cursing up a storm, she started calling people sheep and she left, and within a few minutes she came back and she asked for my name.”
Trained dancer Lenin explained that he had been teaching children to dance before the coronavirus outbreak.
“All I really want to be able to do is to be able to show dance to others and show how much I love it, how much it affected me,” “If I can show that to somebody else, that would be amazing to change their life like it changed mine.”
After Matt’s GoFundMe had such an amazing response, Lenin recorded a special thank you video – in his mask, of course.
It looks like Amber Lynn Gilles won’t have to face him at Starbucks again – he’ll be too busy dancing.
READ MORE
Simply 6 very satisfying takedowns of ‘anti-maskers’
Source LA Times Image GoFundMe


thepoke--2020-06-29--Our 12 favourite reactions to plans for a TV drama about the PM’s handling of Covid-19

Although the topic itself is a work in progress , there is to be a TV show based on Boris @ @ @ @ @ the coronavirus outbreak .
Other than the director , Michael Winterbottom , few details have @ @ @ @ @ was rife after the announcement .
Chambo wondered if the drama might be for an @ @ @ @ @ Morris pointed out one huge hurdle .
Perhaps Michael Winterbottom could choose a title from @ @ @ @ @ .
For example : Boris Johnson did press-ups for the Mail on Sunday – 5 @ @ @ @ @ s front page

Twitter
Although the topic itself is a work in progress, there is to be a TV show based on Boris Johnson‘s handling of the coronavirus outbreak.
Boris Johnson's handling of coronavirus is being adapted into a TV drama https://t.co/AB0qv4PgMP — The Independent (@Independent) June 26, 2020
Other than the director, Michael Winterbottom, few details have been released, so speculation was rife after the announcement.
1.
A Very British Poo
https://t.co/6oGvWf2nj7 — Russ (@RussInCheshire) June 26, 2020
2.
Honey I Killed The Country. https://t.co/AAteanKo8r — David Quantick (@quantick) June 26, 2020
3.
The SHIT Crowd. https://t.co/Ka4DdInVWT — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) June 26, 2020
4.
5.
Only Fools and Hearses. — Sarah Dempster (@Dempster2000) June 26, 2020
6.
7.
Some might say farce is the more appropriate genre. https://t.co/BiFiLHfEEQ — Alex Andreou (@sturdyAlex) June 26, 2020
8.
2 Weddings and 60000 Funerals https://t.co/HYFqc4YqXi — Allan Thornley (@AllanThornley1) June 26, 2020
9.
Making a Murderer? https://t.co/tyHfYUBb2B — Champions of England, Europe and the World. (@g_wilko87) June 26, 2020
10.
11.
Cue Michael Sheen wearing a haystack https://t.co/JzhC7hXnVF — Neil Miles (@neilsmiles) June 26, 2020
12.
People Just Do Nothing https://t.co/kxMlgpEiQU — Russ (@RussInCheshire) June 26, 2020
Chambo wondered if the drama might be for an existing show.
While Joel Morris pointed out one huge hurdle.
Surely they can’t make a TV film of Johnson’s handling of the Coronavirus crisis because Johnson’s handling of the Coronavirus crisis means that we can’t go near enough to each other to film things. — Joel Morris (@gralefrit) June 26, 2020
Perhaps Michael Winterbottom could choose a title from his own impressive back catalogue. For example:
‘The Emperor’s New Clothes’ ‘The Killer Inside Me’ Or even “A Cock and Bull Story’.
READ MORE
Boris Johnson did press-ups for the Mail on Sunday – 5 favourite responses to today’s front page
Image Screengrab, Screengrab


thepoke--2020-06-28--People love this woman’s tale of revenge after someone was rude at a McDonald’s drive thru

This tale of revenge went wildly viral because it ’ s so beautifully done .
The story of an 83 @ @ @ @ @ by the person behind her in the drive thru queue because she was taking too @ @ @ @ @ tale was first shared on Reddit last year and has gone viral all over again @ @ @ @ @ best not served at all .
This piano scale has an unexpected twist and it @ @ @

Life
This tale of revenge went wildly viral because it’s so beautifully done.
The story of an 83 y/o woman who was bothered by the person behind her in the drive thru queue because she was taking too long. Enjoy!
The tale was first shared on Reddit last year and has gone viral all over again.
Revenge is a dish best not served at all.
READ MORE
This piano scale has an unexpected twist and it’s brilliant
Source @_youhandonejob1


thepoke--2020-06-28--Boris Johnson did press-ups for the Mail on Sunday – 5 favourite responses to today’s front page

Boris Johnson ’ s been in the Mail on Sunday telling the paper how he not only changes nappies , @ @ @ @ @ And to prove it he was pictured – not changing nappies , obviously – but @ @ @ @ @ And here are our 5 favourite responses to that .
Johnson doing press-ups wasn ’ @ @ @ @ @ on the front page .

News
Boris Johnson’s been in the Mail on Sunday telling the paper how he not only changes nappies, he can do press-ups.
And to prove it he was pictured – not changing nappies, obviously – but doing press-ups. Apparently.
And here are our 5 favourite responses to that.
1.
[history class, 2100]
“And it was at this point, after 42,000 deaths and a devastating second wave on the horizon, that the Prime Minister invited the press to watch him nob the floor” pic.twitter.com/m99WhNHLws — James Felton (@JimMFelton) June 28, 2020
2.
The unedifying spectacle of Toddler Johnson rolling on the floor of Number 10 to prove he can do press ups. What next? Show us his tummy? — Emma Kennedy (@EmmaKennedy) June 28, 2020
3.
Breaking : Invisible woman announces pregnancy. pic.twitter.com/O1DJice2BR — Oonagh (@Okeating) June 27, 2020
4.
5.
Welcome to the former Soviet Republic of Englanistan. pic.twitter.com/iCtLNCvWjl — Tom Sutcliffe (@tds153) June 27, 2020
Johnson doing press-ups wasn’t the only weird story on the front page.
what a weird front page. It’s mostly about posh people doing normal things: press-ups, changing nappies, moving plant pots. It’s like we’re at the zoo watching the chimps do stuff that makes them seem almost human — Robert Campbell (@rob15959) June 27, 2020
Boris can change nappies, and Kate can move a flowerpot.
It's no wonder they are our leaders. pic.twitter.com/80sVEceBL2 — Henry Mance (@henrymance) June 27, 2020
To conclude, this.
Is that a real front page? — Chris Morgan 🐝 (@ChrisMorgan10) June 27, 2020
And this.
The Prime Minister pic.twitter.com/5wPupvHyB8 — Paul Johnson (@paul__johnson) June 27, 2020
READ MORE
Surely the greatest news story you’ll watch today


thepoke--2020-07-01--The only 5 reactions you need to the idea that washing your hands at a wedding is Marxist

As the UK unlocks – or stops pretending to be locked , if you ’ re Dominic Cummings – weddings @ @ @ @ @ with anti-coronavirus measures such as washing hands before and after the exchange of rings .
@ @ @ @ @ , who is suing the government over the lockdown , had strong feelings about the @ @ @ @ @ was a whole chapter on the etiquette of weddings in Das Kapital .
These five @ @ @ @ @ better than we can .
On a more serious note , Aceedo Domingo made this @ @ @ @ @ Communist dolphins is unlikely to be bettered this year

Twitter
As the UK unlocks – or stops pretending to be locked, if you’re Dominic Cummings – weddings are once again allowed, with anti-coronavirus measures such as washing hands before and after the exchange of rings.
Multi-millionaire businessman, Simon Dolan, who is suing the government over the lockdown, had strong feelings about the precautions.
"Brides and grooms may not be able to kiss and couples will have to wash hands before and after exchanging rings, under new Government rules for weddings" This is all designed to break the traditional family unit. It is Marxist.https://t.co/K65qARVsjL — Simon Dolan #KBF (@simondolan) June 30, 2020
Pretty sure there was a whole chapter on the etiquette of weddings in Das Kapital.
These five reactions said it so much better than we can.
1.
Fellas, it is communist to wash your hands. https://t.co/WbP4N5RMg8 — James Felton (@JimMFelton) June 30, 2020
2.
Ah yes I recall Marx said ‘revolutions are the locomotives of history…but only if we all wash our hands after we get married’ https://t.co/6JKA9ONYoO — Liam Thorp (@LiamThorpECHO) July 1, 2020
3.
Yep,…this b*stard Marx..his cunning plan was to have a pandemic so ppl would have to wash their hands and wait until a tad later in the day to kiss their other half on their wedding day!!
Is there no end to Marx's evil???? https://t.co/A08yjrhjoE — Audrey (@AudreyAurus1) June 30, 2020
4.
Yeah mate, I think it was Karl Marx who said "A spectre is haunting Europe – the spectre of having to wash your hands". — Politics of NV (@politicsofnv) June 30, 2020
5.
They're onto us lads.
Time for plan B https://t.co/M4R92eivKw — James Doleman (@jamesdoleman) June 30, 2020
On a more serious note, Aceedo Domingo made this point.
It is designed to do the exact opposite. Nothing breaks up a family unit quicker than everyone dying. — Aceedo Domingo (@AceedoDomingo) June 30, 2020
Better red than dead.
READ MORE
This headline about Communist dolphins is unlikely to be bettered this year
Source Simon Dolan Image Simon Dolan, @drewcoffman on Unsplash


thepoke--2020-07-01--This Polari weather forecast went down a storm at the end of Pride month

As Pride month came to an end , Owain Wyn Evans , the BBC ’ s drumming weather man , @ @ @ @ @ by delivering the forecast in Polari , the elaborate slang that was once used by @ @ @ @ @ .
Here are a few words you might want to drop into conversations .
Sadly @ @ @ @ @ make the outlook any better , but it went down a storm on Twitter .
@ @ @ @ @ ’ s Kenneth Williams with Hugh Paddick sharing a bit of Polari via ‘ Bona @ @ @ @ @ s not thunder – it ’ s Owain the weather man on drums

Videos
As Pride month came to an end, Owain Wyn Evans, the BBC’s drumming weather man, saw it off in style by delivering the forecast in Polari, the elaborate slang that was once used by members of the gay community.
As #PrideMonth 2020 draws to a close, I wanted to put together this Bona forecast. Polari has been described as a lost gay language used as a form of code between members of the LGBTQ community before homosexuality was decriminalised. #PRIDE2020 pic.twitter.com/yo46n3wrIu — Owain Wyn Evans (@OwainWynEvans) June 30, 2020
Here are a few words you might want to drop into conversations.
Munge – darkness Dolly – pleasant Lallies – legs Capella – hat Vada – see/look
Sadly, it didn’t make the outlook any better, but it went down a storm on Twitter.
Oh vada our Owain screeching the nanti munge in yer actual polari! https://t.co/Thb4OAxlx7 — Richard Coles (@RevRichardColes) June 30, 2020
This is a bona forecast-ette! https://t.co/m3Oom7cUok — Craig Deeley 🇪🇺🏳🌈 (@craiguito) June 30, 2020
What's the story with the overnight munge? Love this. 🌈 https://t.co/CUomHdrf4I — Dr Sara Shinton (@sarashinton) June 30, 2020
If Kenneth Williams did the weather… — George Cooper (@GeorgeICooper) June 30, 2020
On that note, here’s Kenneth Williams with Hugh Paddick sharing a bit of Polari via ‘Bona Books’.
READ MORE
That’s not thunder – it’s Owain the weather man on drums
Source Owain Wyn Evans Image Owain Wyn Evans


thepoke--2020-07-01--This prediction of the future from 1947 is eerily accurate

Back in 1947 , science fiction writer René Barjavel predicted how the future might look , and the short film @ @ @ @ @ oddly familiar .
You don ’ t need to understand French to see that it @ @ @ @ @ handheld devices delivering news , sports and entertainment in a way that would be so @ @ @ @ @ each other and take needless risks .
The clip found its way onto Twitter , @ @ @ @ @ it on their handheld devices , while ignoring each other and taking needless risks .
@ @ @ @ @ accurate it was .
It could have been a lucky guess , Barjavel could have @ @ @ @ @ or there may be another explanation .
This prediction from 20 years ago about what @ @ @ @ @ the future is so accurate it ’ s spooky

Videos
Back in 1947, science fiction writer René Barjavel predicted how the future might look, and the short film version of his predictions feels oddly familiar.
You don’t need to understand French to see that it’s all based around handheld devices delivering news, sports and entertainment in a way that would be so engrossing that people would ignore each other and take needless risks.
Bang on the money, Monsieur Barjavel.
The clip found its way onto Twitter, where people probably looked at it on their handheld devices, while ignoring each other and taking needless risks.
When French Sci-fi Barjavel was asked to imagine the future just after world war 2 : he had it almost right pic.twitter.com/CDCKAGbXq1 — Tariq KRIM (@tariqkrim) June 28, 2020
People were stunned by how accurate it was.
This is one extraordinarily accurate prediction in a work of science fiction. This seldom ever happens. I’m amazed that I hadn’t seen it before today. https://t.co/Zbwe0xKn0E — William Gibson (@GreatDismal) June 29, 2020
This is ASTOUNDING https://t.co/GQeG7yN9X7 — Janey Godley (@JaneyGodley) June 29, 2020
A work of genius https://t.co/IUPvjg7JWD — Sarah Parcak (@indyfromspace) June 29, 2020
Wow.
Nostradamus level. Except you know … Real. https://t.co/nc9v53Bj67 — James H. Dargie (@JHDargie) June 29, 2020
It could have been a lucky guess, Barjavel could have been a predictive genius, or there may be another explanation.
Ok, my future prediction is that right now there's a grad student at MIT named Barjavel who's about to invent time travel. His assistant's name is Leonardo. — Keith Hendershot (@HendershotKeith) June 29, 2020
READ MORE
This prediction from 20 years ago about what computers would be like in the future is so accurate it’s spooky
Source Les Documents Cinématographiques Image Les Documents Cinématographiques


thepoke--2020-07-01--The White House claims Trump is the most informed person on the planet – 11 informed rebuttals

For several days , Donald Trump has been embroiled in accusations of ignoring a bounty placed on the heads of @ @ @ @ @ , with proof emerging that the claim was shared with the US President in a @ @ @ @ @ On Monday , the White House Press Secretary , Kayleigh McEnany , excused Trump by @ @ @ @ @ t been “ personally briefed ” , implying that the written information he ’ d @ @ @ @ @ enough .
Naturally , the press followed this up at Tuesday ’ s briefing .
@ @ @ @ @ those points : Donald Trump talked about an AIDS vaccine which doesn ’ t exist @ @ @ @ @

Twitter
For several days, Donald Trump has been embroiled in accusations of ignoring a bounty placed on the heads of US soldiers by Vladimir Putin, with proof emerging that the claim was shared with the US President in a written briefing in February.
On Monday, the White House Press Secretary, Kayleigh McEnany, excused Trump by claiming that he hadn’t been “personally briefed”, implying that the written information he’d been given wasn’t enough.
Naturally, the press followed this up at Tuesday’s briefing.
Kayleigh: The President does read and also consumes intelligence verbally. This President is the most informed person on the planet earth when it comes to the threats that we face pic.twitter.com/tr0e8MU0LN — Acyn Torabi (@Acyn) June 30, 2020
Let’s look at those points:
The President does read. He consumes intelligence “verbally”. He is the most informed person on planet earth.
Hang on – what?
NOW: @PressSec says @realDonaldTrump "This president is the most informed person on planet earth." pic.twitter.com/sUdOpk8AAL — Brian J. Karem (@BrianKarem) June 30, 2020
via Gfycat
Twitter users weren’t convinced.
1.
If Trump is the most informed person on planet, then I must be the straightest. See? Just saying it doesn’t make it so. https://t.co/hxIReknMfk — George Takei (@GeorgeTakei) June 30, 2020
2.
Kayleigh has words. All of them are lies. Binders full of lies.
There should be a laugh track to accompany her statement. https://t.co/ddXMu0EVY8 — Paulette Feeney (@PauletteParis1) June 30, 2020
3.
He thought Finland was part of Russia and didn't know that the UK has an arsenal of nuclear weapons. He's not the most informed person on the planet on any subject. He's an angry simpleton with a colossal ego and tiny intellect. — JRehling (@JRehling) June 30, 2020
4.
omg. how did she not burst into flames? https://t.co/SgdPie5EhR — Hold My PomPoms Bitches (@Scattered211) June 30, 2020
5.
OMG I guess she wants a job at the Trump Org or Fox after this. You could not pay me enough to humiliate myself like this. — marybl (@marybl62) June 30, 2020
6.
He thinks windmills cause cancer. https://t.co/hWp2PzzECt — Please Wear Masks (@DanSlott) June 30, 2020
7.
Joseph Goebbels just texted me to suggest that Kayleigh might want to dial it down a little. — Benjamin Dreyer (@BCDreyer) June 30, 2020
8.
He wouldn’t even be the most informed person at a Planet Hollywood. — Allison Floyd (@AllisonRFloyd) June 30, 2020
9.
He's also, he would acknowledge, the most humble person ever to have existed. https://t.co/tiF20UbpjS — Nicholas Kristof (@NickKristof) June 30, 2020
10.
Can you imagine calling a press conference in one hour with the main talking point being – "The President Does Read." — Jonathan Gaffney (@JGaffneyUSN) June 30, 2020
11.
🏆Dumbest Fucking Sentence Ever Spoken Award🏆 https://t.co/LKN9gnWL2c — Devin Nunes Mom (@NotDevinsMom) June 30, 2020
In conclusion:
Kayleigh: Trump is the most informed person on Earth. Me: So doesn’t that kind of kill your “he wasn’t briefed” excuse? 🤔 — 🇨🇦🔥 Hot Medic 🔥 #BlackLivesMatter (@anthonycwalker) July 1, 2020
READ MORE
Donald Trump talked about an AIDS vaccine which doesn’t exist – our 11 favourite reactions
Source @Acyn Image @Acyn, Screengrab


thepoke--2020-06-30--Kanye said Kim is now a billionaire with this veg-based tweet – 9 favourite responses

Kanye West had some very exciting news to share with everyone .
Yes , his wife Kim Kardashian West is @ @ @ @ @ And he announced it by tweeting this .
Naturally people had thoughts , and here @ @ @ @ @ .
If you ’ re not particularly into your veg-based tweets and prefer your language @ @ @ @ @ there was also this straight-talking response .
Kanye and Kim shared a couple of photos @ @ @ @ @ the 9 funniest

Twitter
Kanye West had some very exciting news to share with everyone. Yes, his wife Kim Kardashian West is now officially a billionaire!
Yay!
And he announced it by tweeting this.
I am so proud of my beautiful wife Kim Kardashian West for officially becoming a billionaire You’ve weathered the craziest storms and now God is shining on you and our family So blessed this is still life
So I made you this still life We love you so much pic.twitter.com/Vvtgzodnah — ye (@kanyewest) June 30, 2020
Naturally people had thoughts, and here are 9 of the best.
1.
We all share your joy, Kanye – this is EXACTLY the news everyone wanted as the world is being ravaged by a global pandemic & economic disaster. https://t.co/NQuXQbDezj — Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) June 30, 2020
2.
kanye that’s a bell pepper not your wife https://t.co/BDiQPAnh55 — beans after dark after dark (@goodbeanaltalt) June 30, 2020
3.
Fair play to Kanye. He tipped out the contents of a Ready Steady Cook carrier bag and called it art https://t.co/kvff7iQPVm — Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) June 30, 2020
4.
Can't wait until I graft my arse off to make a billion dollars, and my husband Tweets me a picture of a tomato and tells me God did it all. https://t.co/DqQbFNIZzS — Caitlin Moran (@caitlinmoran) June 30, 2020
5.
Kanye West & Kim Kardashian are both drowning. You only have one life ring.
What sandwich do you make? https://t.co/RfJrXb6WtM — Jayne Sharp (@Jaynesharp) June 30, 2020
6.
She started with just a dream and a $100m trust fund and now look at her! https://t.co/yZmbnLDQuY — Bethany Black (@BeffernieBlack) June 30, 2020
7.
room left unread, as usual https://t.co/94KY7ZkXN6 — Bolu Babalola (@BeeBabs) June 30, 2020
8.
i don’t know where my next paycheck is coming from https://t.co/sC7ntqpYET — Jill Gutowitz (@jillboard) June 30, 2020
9.
I’m gonna assume that only billionaires will understand what this means https://t.co/0kW6uHYcTA — Mat (@matchu_chutrain) June 30, 2020
If you’re not particularly into your veg-based tweets and prefer your language a little bit fruitier, there was also this straight-talking response.
Read the fucking room you thundercunt. https://t.co/6a9YmVf6IM — Dom Joly (@domjoly) June 30, 2020
READ MORE
Kanye and Kim shared a couple of photos and people had thoughts – the 9 funniest


thepoke--2020-06-30--People love this letter Carl Reiner sent to a comedian replacing him at an awards do

The comedy legend Carl Reiner has died aged 98 , prompting many tributes in honour of the writer , producer , director and great , great friend of Mel Brooks .
People were also sharing favourite clips from his films including The Man With Two Brains , The Jerk , and Dead Men Don ’ t Wear Plaid .
This was also raising lots of smiles , a letter he sent to actor and comedian Jon Cryer after he filled in at an awards do which Reiner had hosted for many years .
‘ The brilliant and hilarious Carl Reiner @ @ @ @ @ @ @ for decades before his health forced him to take the night off , ’ said @ MrJonCryer on Twitter .
‘ They asked me to sub in for him .
Here ’ s the letter he sent me.
’ I thank you for filling in for me tonight .
I wish with all my heart that you fail , or if you don ’ t , that you are no more than adequate .
I don ’ t want to have to compete with you for this non-paying job .
For 22 years @ @ @ @ @ @ @ had .
And because you can ’ t have too many clips … You really can ’ t have too many .
Hollywood comedy legend Carl Reiner has died aged 98 – all our favourite tributes

Twitter
The comedy legend Carl Reiner has died aged 98, prompting many tributes in honour of the writer, producer, director and great, great friend of Mel Brooks.
People were also sharing favourite clips from his films including The Man With Two Brains, The Jerk, and Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid.
This was also raising lots of smiles, a letter he sent to actor and comedian Jon Cryer after he filled in at an awards do which Reiner had hosted for many years.
‘The brilliant and hilarious Carl Reiner hosted the Director’s Guild awards for decades before his health forced him to take the night off,’ said @MrJonCryer on Twitter. ‘They asked me to sub in for him. Here’s the letter he sent me.’
Dear Jon I thank you for filling in for me tonight. I wish with all my heart that you fail, or if you don’t, that you are no more than adequate. I don’t want to have to compete with you for this non-paying job. Carl Reiner For 22 years, the best host the DGA ever had.
Working with, and getting to know Carl Reiner were two of the great thrills of my career. A lovely man who lived a wonderful life and brought joy to literally millions. — Jon Cryer (@MrJonCryer) June 30, 2020
And fwiw, I killed at the DGA Awards that night. Started the show by reading his letter aloud. — Jon Cryer (@MrJonCryer) June 30, 2020
Perfect.
And because you can’t have too many clips …
RIP comedy genius Carl Reiner pic.twitter.com/jRcCRLDexj — end of daves ❄ 🥕 🧻 (@davemacladd) June 30, 2020
You really can’t have too many.
The Man With Two Brains has more crackerjack jokes than a dozen lesser comedies. But this one I have a particular soft spot for. pic.twitter.com/Qwn3t59Cks — Nick de Semlyen (@NickdeSemlyen) June 30, 2020
READ MORE
Hollywood comedy legend Carl Reiner has died aged 98 – all our favourite tributes
Source @MrJonCryer


thepoke--2020-06-30--Hollywood comedy legend Carl Reiner has died aged 98 – all our favourite tributes

Tributes were being paid today to the Hollywood comedy legend Carl Reiner , who has died aged 98 .
The @ @ @ @ @ and great friend of Mel Brooks was responsible for a string of hit comedies with @ @ @ @ @ ’ 70s and early ’ 80s including The Jerk and The Man With Two Brains @ @ @ @ @ he also created and co-wrote The Dick Van Dyke Show and acted in films including @ @ @ @ @ His son , film-maker Rob Reiner said this on Twitter today .
And here are @ @ @ @ @ , many tributes that were being paid .
People love this letter Carl Reiner sent @ @ @ @ @ at an awards do

Pics
Tributes were being paid today to the Hollywood comedy legend Carl Reiner, who has died aged 98.
The writer, producer, director and great friend of Mel Brooks was responsible for a string of hit comedies with Steve Martin in the late ’70s and early ’80s including The Jerk and The Man With Two Brains.
In an extraordinary career he also created and co-wrote The Dick Van Dyke Show and acted in films including Ocean’s Eleven.
His son, film-maker Rob Reiner said this on Twitter today.
Last night my dad passed away. As I write this my heart is hurting. He was my guiding light. — Rob Reiner (@robreiner) June 30, 2020
And here are just some of the many, many tributes that were being paid.
1.
Goodbye to my greatest mentor in movies and in life. Thank you, dear Carl. https://t.co/H7A4ZwIqfc — Steve Martin (@SteveMartinToGo) June 30, 2020
2.
RIP to the comedy legend Carl Reiner. who gave us so much laughter in film and TV, in front of and behind the camera. Apart from anything else, thank you for this, the most romantic bedroom scene of all time. https://t.co/9yDBWwE7GX — edgarwright (@edgarwright) June 30, 2020
3.
Carl Reiner was comedy genius. Often that genius made other funny people even funnier. But give him a stage and he could spin laughter out of any moment. I watched him do it time and again. His contributions to comedy are eternal. And a lovely man, as well. #ripCarlReiner — jason alexander (@IJasonAlexander) June 30, 2020
4.
The Man With Two Brains has more crackerjack jokes than a dozen lesser comedies. But this one I have a particular soft spot for. pic.twitter.com/Qwn3t59Cks — Nick de Semlyen (@NickdeSemlyen) June 30, 2020
5.
So sad to hear about @carlreiner Not only did he make my favorite TV& movies (see:Where’s Poppa) but his humanity was beyond compare. His heart was so full of love. Never left his house empty handed- book, space pen, Swiss Army knife. RIP to a man that embodies the word mensch pic.twitter.com/mazBmwznkX — Sarah Silverman (@SarahKSilverman) June 30, 2020
6.
My friend Carl Reiner died last night. His talent will live on for a long time, but the loss of his kindness and decency leaves a hole in our hearts. We love you, Carl. pic.twitter.com/QWyNOYILhW — Alan Alda (@alanalda) June 30, 2020
7.
RIP, Carl Reiner. He directed “The Jerk”(1979). [Editorial Note : a politically, culturally and socially-incorrect comedy that doesn’t get made today] The “Opti-Grab” scene with Steve Martin and the late Revere native Bill Macy. pic.twitter.com/9kSGjMIuQd — Boston Radio Watch® (@bostonradio) June 30, 2020
8.
Just three days ago. RIP Carl Reiner. https://t.co/Jhe0TT07cu — John Cassaday (@JohnCassaday) June 30, 2020
9.
Mel Brooks drove to Carl Reiner's house every night so they could have dinner & watch Jeopardy! together. This article about their 70-year-long friendship, written in February just before the lockdown, is so wonderful: https://t.co/5b7K30gwiC https://t.co/xAK3NkLMb1 — Dana Stevens (@thehighsign) June 30, 2020
10.
Godspeed, Carl Reiner. You absolute American treasure. pic.twitter.com/HlVBQtU0jd — Scott Linnen (@ScottLinnen) June 30, 2020
11.
RIP Carl Reiner
READ MORE
People love this letter Carl Reiner sent to a comedian replacing him at an awards do


thepoke--2020-06-30--Theresa May’s takedown of Michael Gove just now had the whole internet applauding

As you may have seen elsewhere , Boris Johnson has caused more than a little controversy with his appointment of @ @ @ @ @ the UK ’ s national security adviser .
Among those not happy is Johnson ’ @ @ @ @ @ Theresa May , and she let Michael Gove , chancellor of the Duchy of Lancaster @ @ @ @ @ uncertain terms in the House of Commons today .
And here are just a few @ @ @ @ @ saying about it .
Lots of people were suddenly thinking like this .
Mark Francois @ @ @ @ @ got exactly the reaction it deserved – 12 hilarious takedowns

News
As you may have seen elsewhere, Boris Johnson has caused more than a little controversy with his appointment of EU negotiator David Frost as the UK’s national security adviser.
Among those not happy is Johnson’s predecessor as PM, Theresa May, and she let Michael Gove, chancellor of the Duchy of Lancaster, know it in no uncertain terms in the House of Commons today.
"Why then, is the new national security adviser a political appointee with no proven expertise in national security?" asks former prime minister Theresa May Michael Gove says not all national security advisers have been "steeped in the security world"https://t.co/7R5crkq6sE pic.twitter.com/aQE810tiBp — BBC Politics (@BBCPolitics) June 30, 2020
And here are just a few of the things people were saying about it.
1.
Hello, police? I’d like to report a murder. pic.twitter.com/WHlXqTTQCT — David Schneider (@davidschneider) June 30, 2020
2.
https://twitter.com/SpillerOfTea/status/1277937882762743810?s=20
3.
Wow. Theresa May appointed Sedwill and was a huge advocate of him. Nonetheless this is quite the intervention. May increasingly going from loyal backbencher to Ted Heath with no intervening period whatsoever. https://t.co/MrZaB6euHC — Lewis Goodall (@lewis_goodall) June 30, 2020
4.
https://twitter.com/PippaCrerar/status/1277935653980975104?s=20
5.
Theresa is not happy. Not. At. All. https://t.co/gPmVOQ5fBo — Emma Barnett (@Emmabarnett) June 30, 2020
6.
Mrs May appears to be saying to Mr Gove that he is full of shit. https://t.co/jwUhTDkuRH — Dr Martin Remains Optimistic (@MartinRemains) June 30, 2020
7.
feel the ice in the words “proven expertise” as May quotes Gove’s words back at him – this is quite a moment https://t.co/KaB0UyFwfv — Jim Pickard (@PickardJE) June 30, 2020
8.
T May goes in, studs up. https://t.co/6YATmFXstx — John Sweeney (@johnsweeneyroar) June 30, 2020
9.
Whoever this person is speaking truth to the dangerous populists in her party, she should be Prime Minister. https://t.co/7kwNo3VPp3 — The Secret Barrister (@BarristerSecret) June 30, 2020
Lots of people were suddenly thinking like this.
I’ve just slipped into an alternate reality where I agree with Theresa May https://t.co/Kreh2NWqf4 — Peter Stefanovic (@PeterStefanovi2) June 30, 2020
READ MORE
Mark Francois’ letter to Michel Barnier got exactly the reaction it deserved – 12 hilarious takedowns
Source @BBCPolitics


thepoke--2020-06-30--Batman v Spider-Man (2020)

Batman v Spider-Man (2020)

'1979 horoscope I am begging you to read this '

Videos
‘This is why I love the internet,’ says @MarieAnneUK.
La cosa no está fácil para nadie. pic.twitter.com/bcaUE90oiz — El Triqui (@El_Triqui_) June 28, 2020
READ MORE
This video of foxes laughing is just the content we needed today
Source Twitter @MarieAnnUK @El_Triqui_


thepoke--2020-06-30--17 childhood things that made us think our friends’ parents were rich

People have been busy sharing their childhood memories of things our friends ’ parents had that made us think they @ @ @ @ @ when @ revbreakfast tweeted this .
And it got us more than a little bit @ @ @ @ @ favourite responses .

Twitter
People have been busy sharing their childhood memories of things our friends’ parents had that made us think they were rich.
It started when @revbreakfast tweeted this.
Morning. When you were a kid what did your mates parents have that made you think they were rich? pic.twitter.com/aLBlPftQ0W — Revolution Breakfast (@revbreakfast) June 29, 2020
And it got us more than a little bit nostalgic. Here are our favourite responses.
1.
Dimmer switches. — Nicola (@nicola_dEU) June 29, 2020
2.
My friend always had bottles of Lucozade, even when she wasn’t at death’s door. — ThatMagpie (@lapetitepie) June 29, 2020
3.
Soda Stream — Scheherazade (@Default69202648) June 29, 2020
4.
A shower that wasn’t just them rubber tube things attached to the taps. — sarahjane (@sarahjane792) June 29, 2020
5.
Proper sandwich fillings like boiled ham instead of beef or salmon paste — Bowker (@BowkerFiona) June 29, 2020
6.
7.
Imperial Leather Soap — Mike D’Rews (@mdrews1) June 29, 2020
8.
9.


Burn of the day

We ’ re grateful to @ HiAndyGaffney for sharing this from the Star Wars : The Force Awakens visual dictionary @ @ @ @ @ Awakens Visual Dictionary they tried to give a canonical reason for Domhnall Gleeson looking like @ @ @ @ @ universe where planets have multiple suns i would like to know how any ginger survives @ @ @ @ @ Irish head on him ’ They didn ’ t have to do us like that @ @ @ @ @ It Ever Was ( @ shockproofbeats ) June 30 , 2020

We’re grateful to @HiAndyGaffney for sharing this from the Star Wars: The Force Awakens visual dictionary.
It’s making a lot of people’s days better.
Reminder that in Force Awakens Visual Dictionary they tried to give a canonical reason for Domhnall Gleeson looking like Domhnall Gleeson pic.twitter.com/Z5WDncFaPP
Burn of the day.
In a universe where planets have multiple suns i would like to know how any ginger survives
It should read ‘Big Irish head on him’
They didn’t have to do us like that https://t.co/Hdo6r4b5oc
— Séamas It Ever Was (@shockproofbeats) June 30, 2020


thepoke--2020-06-30--This video of foxes laughing is just the content we needed today

Some days are harder than others in lockdown and we hope you ’ re not having too difficult a time @ @ @ @ @ But whatever mood you ’ re in , we ’ re hoping this will lift @ @ @ @ @ ( and maybe a lot ) .
It ’ s a video of foxes laughing @ @ @ @ @ a watch for yourself .
And just in case you didn ’ t see this @ @ @ @ @ watch it again – remember this ?
‘ I can not , I repeat I @ @ @ @ @ this video of 22 large teddy bears riding a rollercoaster ’

Videos
Some days are harder than others in lockdown and we hope you’re not having too difficult a time of it right now.
But whatever mood you’re in, we’re hoping this will lift it just a little bit (and maybe a lot).
It’s a video of foxes laughing and, well, have a watch for yourself.
If you've never heard a fox laugh, you’re welcome!
pic.twitter.com/jOLVddXWJ1 — mollyfprince (@mollyfprince) June 29, 2020
Wonderful.
We need more of this and less of pretty much everything else. 😀 — Run, Eat, Ralph 🏃🏻🍕🍺 (@Mr_Ralph_) June 29, 2020
Foxes are just dogs running on cat software — Dennis 'T-980' Emigh (@T980) June 29, 2020
Can we crowd fund some late-night comedy to stop the bastards shagging? https://t.co/oklpQOuCsD — Matt Lees (@Jam_sponge) June 30, 2020
And just in case you didn’t see this – or you want to watch it again – remember this?
But have you ever seen a fox steal a phone?!? pic.twitter.com/bbkrvqopht — Quarantine Queen 👑 (@Socia11yDistant) June 30, 2020
READ MORE
‘I cannot, I repeat I CANNOT, stop watching this video of 22 large teddy bears riding a rollercoaster’
Source @mollyfprince


thepoke--2020-06-30--Lockdown laughs – 10 more things we’ve learnt about the pandemic

If you had “ Leicester sent back into full lockdown ” on your coronavirus bingo sheet – cross that bad boy off , because their spike is worse than your spike .
Elsewhere , people are gearing up for the pubs opening , because it takes a lot of prep to sit at home judging people from a distance .
To help you get into the right mindset , here ’ s some pandemic humour for you .
1 .
Not every country of the UK decided to try meaningless posturing as a coronavirus prevention strategy 2 .
Leicester ’ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ways than one 3 .
We ’ ve learnt quite a bit about human nature – not all of it good 4 .
The English approach would be more at home in a travelling fairground than in parliament 5 .
Some safety measures might be a vast improvement on what went before 7 .
If the man who thought up the safety measures can do it , so can everyone else .
Right ?
8 .
If you ’ re going to follow the guidance , follow it properly 9 .
The open @ @ @ @ @ @ @ some may think 10 .
Just wait till they get involved 11 favourite new funny reactions to the pandemic

Twitter
If you had “Leicester sent back into full lockdown” on your coronavirus bingo sheet – cross that bad boy off, because their spike is worse than your spike.
Elsewhere, people are gearing up for the pubs opening, because it takes a lot of prep to sit at home judging people from a distance.
To help you get into the right mindset, here’s some pandemic humour for you.
1. Not every country of the UK decided to try meaningless posturing as a coronavirus prevention strategy
Without press ups https://t.co/Aa0dG6lFvb — Janey Godley (@JaneyGodley) June 29, 2020
2. Leicester’s having a hard time in more ways than one
Leicester is in local lockdown. Bit like the football team since the restart. — Gary Lineker (@GaryLineker) June 29, 2020
3. We’ve learnt quite a bit about human nature – not all of it good
Any zombie movie that doesn't have hordes of people running towards the zombies to deliberately get bitten because they're convinced it's a liberal hoax is going to look pretty unrealistic now. — SlothHammer 40K (@CaseyExplosion) June 27, 2020
4. The English approach would be more at home in a travelling fairground than in parliament
Really can’t think of anything worse sounding than a “whack a mole” approach. What have you gone for, South Korea?Test track and trace? Nice. We’ve gone for the flail our arms around a lot and hope that manage to twat it. — James Felton (@JimMFelton) June 29, 2020
5. Some safety measures might be a vast improvement on what went before
6. Pandemic fatigue is making some people pretty grumpy
Early days of lockdown were a real high (for me) on Twitter. Everyone trying their best to get through and plenty of kindness. But by Christ we’ve all reached the end of our tether now haven’t we? My timeline’s like an unhappy family trapped in a caravan in Skegness in a monsoon. — Debra (@ddebralouise) June 29, 2020
7. If the man who thought up the safety measures can do it, so can everyone else. Right?
For anyone looking for a day out if Leicester goes into lockdown. #leicesterlockdown #BarnardCastle pic.twitter.com/7qM5mKONHB — Cruella de Vil (@_Cruella_de_Vil) June 29, 2020
8. If you’re going to follow the guidance, follow it properly
people wearing masks without covering their nose pic.twitter.com/9UvOssb2O4 — Réal Funghi 🇨🇦 (@realfunghi) June 29, 2020
9. The open pubs aren’t as tempting as some may think
Not going out this weekend because the bars won’t be serving the measures I’ve gotten accustomed to — Cat Rosé (@WinningByARose) June 29, 2020
10. Just wait till they get involved
still the funniest interaction on this website pic.twitter.com/LGmHawx4g7 — nance hall (@TheFragiIe) June 29, 2020
READ MORE
11 favourite new funny reactions to the pandemic
Image @unibridge_project on Unsplash


thepoke--2020-06-30--Piers Morgan was so unhappy with Dan Walker’s Matt Hancock interview that he took over the questioni

Piers Morgan was so unhappy with Dan Walker’s Matt Hancock interview that he took over the questioning himself

As you ’ ll know by now , government ministers haven ’ t been keen on talking to Piers Morgan @ @ @ @ @ Morning Britain for some time now .
Health secretary Matt Hancock was prepared to talk @ @ @ @ @ ’ s Breakfast , however , and it ’ s fair to say a lot @ @ @ @ @ BBC man might have been a little bit more , well , rigorous .
This @ @ @ @ @ particular .
Morgan was so incensed by Hancock ’ s answer that he decided to @ @ @ @ @ .
Not that Hancock was around to answer , obviously .
Here ’ s what @ @ @ @ @ his critics .
He wasn ’ t winning these people over though .
And he @ @ @ @ @ over this guy , but you knew that already .
Piers Morgan trolled Dan Walker @ @ @ @ @ and the BBC man had the perfect response

Videos
As you’ll know by now, government ministers haven’t been keen on talking to Piers Morgan on ITV’s Good Morning Britain for some time now.
Health secretary Matt Hancock was prepared to talk to Dan Walker on BBC1’s Breakfast, however, and it’s fair to say a lot of people wondered if the BBC man might have been a little bit more, well, rigorous.
This particular Q&A in particular.
Dan Walker – How many people are being tested? Matt Hancock – The number of people being tested is meaningless…
the meaningful figure is how many tests are being conducted. #BBCBreakfast pic.twitter.com/SjMR3RfMPY — Haggis_UK 🇬🇧 🇪🇺 (@Haggis_UK) June 30, 2020
Morgan was so incensed by Hancock’s answer that he decided to take over the questioning himself. Not that Hancock was around to answer, obviously.
“What are you talking about Health Secretary? What could be a more important bit of data than how many people are being tested?’ @piersmorgan This is the response we should have seen on #BBCBreakfast pic.twitter.com/1Ossx2HbBD — Peter Stefanovic (@PeterStefanovi2) June 30, 2020
Here’s what Walker had to say to his critics.
It is essential that politicians are allowed to speak. The idea (from some) that we, and others, don’t challenge ministers is completely untrue.
Important to ask questions
Important to press
Important to let you listen
Thanks for watching #BBCBreakfast — Dan Walker (@mrdanwalker) June 30, 2020
He wasn’t winning these people over though.
Sorry Dan but the reason they come on your show is because you give them an easy ride. I know it’s what you’ve been instructed but it’s very frustrating to watch. These charlatans need to be challenged. — Maureen G (@Mo_graham4242) June 30, 2020
Dan Walker has just done what BBC News people always do when criticised — an appeal to authority, a claim that they're just 'polite'. @piersmorgan, whatever you think of him, is right that BBC Breakfast is getting ministers on because it is a cosy environment. — Mic Wright (@brokenbottleboy) June 30, 2020
And he definitely wasn’t winning over this guy, but you knew that already.
Mate, you blew it. Calm down. https://t.co/qacdKC3vHz — Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) June 30, 2020
https://twitter.com/mrdanwalker/status/1277872243964600321?s=20
You get them because they know they’ll get an ready ride as we sadly saw today… https://t.co/H2kPcI2nZX — Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) June 30, 2020
Basically, this.
I love how Good Morning Britain turned into Gogglebox this morning.
Piers Morgan watching political interviews on BBC Breakfast and shouting at his screen.
He'll be wearing a tiger onesie and piling cakes and biscuits up on his desk soon. — Ian Hyland (@HylandIan) June 30, 2020
READ MORE
Piers Morgan trolled Dan Walker’s Boris Johnson interview and the BBC man had the perfect response


thepoke--2020-06-30--The New York Times wins correction of the week

The New York Times got itself a little bit of unwanted attention yesterday when it informed readers how British people @ @ @ @ @ by flocking to beaches , parks and … where ?
Still , at least it @ @ @ @ @ our correction of the week , which we are sure they will cherish .
And @ @ @ @ @ , it ’ s not as good as this one from the Guardian a few @ @ @

Weird World
The New York Times got itself a little bit of unwanted attention yesterday when it informed readers how British people were coping with the pandemic by flocking to beaches, parks and … where?
Still, at least it had the consolation of winning our correction of the week, which we are sure they will cherish.
Streams, swamps, whatever.
And while it’s good, it’s not as good as this one from the Guardian a few weeks back.
READ MORE
Guardian correction of the day
Source @Hudson_roe @ianbirrell


thepoke--2020-06-30--The way this 7-year-old comedy sketch flips a racist trope is as relevant as ever – and very funny

A 7-year-old comedy sketch has resurfaced , because it calls out a specific type of everyday racism that ’ s @ @ @ @ @ every day .
It ’ s also very funny .
Written by actor , comedian @ @ @ @ @ David Ury – who has also worked as Ken Tanaka – and featuring Stella Choe @ @ @ @ @ sketch shows something that people of colour have to put up with all the time @ @ @ @ @ Stella turning the tables is as wonderful to watch now as it was in 2013 @ @ @ @ @ blink-and-you-miss-him jogger at the start is David Ury in a sneaky cameo .
We ’ @ @ @ @ @ but the sketch has resurfaced via Twitter , where it ’ s really gelled with @ @ @ @ @ equality .
Nicola James shared the clip with just one addition – # BlackLivesMatter .
@ @ @ @ @ Bible botherer really wasn ’ t messing around

Videos
A 7-year-old comedy sketch has resurfaced, because it calls out a specific type of everyday racism that’s still seen – well, every day. It’s also very funny.
Written by actor, comedian and Japanese language specialist, David Ury – who has also worked as Ken Tanaka – and featuring Stella Choe and Scott Beehner, the sketch shows something that people of colour have to put up with all the time, and the sight of Stella turning the tables is as wonderful to watch now as it was in 2013.
Oh, and that blink-and-you-miss-him jogger at the start is David Ury in a sneaky cameo.
We’re not sure how, but the sketch has resurfaced via Twitter, where it’s really gelled with the current conversation around racial equality.
For anyone who’s ever said “But where are you really from?” pic.twitter.com/SX4rcickIm — Nuwan Dissanayaka (@nuwandiss) June 27, 2020
I love this video! https://t.co/BvXquAUPAK — Alex Spring (@AlexSpring17) June 29, 2020
Yep, this 👇🏽🙄
If I had a £ for every time asked, I could buy myself a very nice quintessentially English Mulberry handbag @MulberryEngland #ifanyonesoffering https://t.co/YE6PHaZP1J — Kiran Hewitt (@KiranHewitt) June 27, 2020
Yup – and I’m only 100 miles from where I was born – but 40 years after I moved [in my 20’s] it’s still happening….. 😂 https://t.co/HoiGLaA3ex — Harriett Moore B1 (@b1_moore) June 28, 2020
Nicola James shared the clip with just one addition – #BlackLivesMatter.
READ MORE
The takedown of this racist Bible botherer really wasn’t messing around
Source YouTube Image YouTube


thepoke--2020-06-30--19 of the most cringe-inducing things people have admitted to doing

Show me the person who has no memories that make them want to cringe themselves inside out and I ’ @ @ @ @ @ a very strong state of denial .
A tweeter named Erin shared one of her @ @ @ @ @ like it ’ s the lad who should be embarrassed , to be fair .
@ @ @ @ @ , so we picked the best – or the worst – of the ones that @ @ @

Twitter
Show me the person who has no memories that make them want to cringe themselves inside out and I’ll show you someone in a very strong state of denial.
A tweeter named Erin shared one of her own cringe moments.
What’s the most embarrassing thing you’ve ever done in your life mine is that I once cried over a lad who owned a private reg plate that said wavey — Erin (@ezzzzzzx) June 27, 2020
Sounds like it’s the lad who should be embarrassed, to be fair.
Her question opened the floodgates, so we picked the best – or the worst – of the ones that were printable.
Some are NSFW.
1.
i was trash talking a gift that my sister bought someone else only to find out later she got me the same thing i was literally Mortified…………. my ass was like “ew why would u spend $350 on that ugly ass bag” then i unwrapped it ….. https://t.co/jzwO8vqjZN pic.twitter.com/mAbJp3KkU3 — kim deal on steroids (@adrocklover420) June 29, 2020
2.
Shit myself at Matthew street festival and had to walk past about a million people in jeans covered in shit. I then had to lie to a taxi driver and say I’d stood in shit and held me trav out the window. He kept turning round looking at me saying he could still smell shit hahahaha https://t.co/SBPYbglnkh — Luke Kenny (@LukeKenny90) June 28, 2020
3.
Went to Europa Pools with me mates in year 8. Thought I was being dead cool impressing the girls in the deep end as the wave machine came on. Got sucked under, couldn't catch me breath. Lifeguard jumped in, emergency buzzer went off and got carried out like Rose off the Titanic. https://t.co/wBTxfXnFJi — Leon Kearney (@TheLeonKearney) June 28, 2020
4.
Try accidentally throwing your phone in your Nana’s grave at her burial, instead of a rose, infront of your entire family https://t.co/WP6G1rQhFU — Sophie Finnigan (@sophie_finnigan) June 29, 2020
5.
I tried my dads false teeth in once when i was about 6 and they didnt fit and i heard my dad come up the stairs and to save myself the embaressment of being caught with them i flushed his very expensive veneers down the toilet and its still a sore subject to this day https://t.co/7isnMRkZOW — 😎 Megan (@megaan27) June 29, 2020
6.
At a festival the main way in was downhill, I fell and then rolled down it in front of about 9000 people. Worst of it was my skirt came over my head revealing THE biggest pair of flowery granny pants my mate had give me as a joke 🙈🙈 — spion klopp *⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (@arpeggi1) June 28, 2020
7.
Trying to impress a computer technician on a night out by telling him I played runescape 🥴 https://t.co/dMWJ4oekM7 — emily (@sugarspunemily) June 28, 2020
8.
after I’d finished my French oral exam I shook the examiners hand when she was actually just asking for my paper https://t.co/QDlrUcuieC — Lucy ✨ (@Lucylucile) June 29, 2020
9.
a cried over a 27 year old man who lived in his mums attic n had a twilight poster taped over the hole he’d punched in his wall https://t.co/GtpobExFfJ — luce (@babyscrambles) June 29, 2020
10.