thepoke--2020-09-16--‘I accidentally bought inspirational paper towels and I am FURIOUS’

Over on Twitter writer Jill Twiss shared this kitchen roll she bought by accident and it went viral , wildly @ @ @ @ @ bought inspirational paper towels and I am FURIOUS , ’ said @ jilltwiss .
And @ @ @ @ @ here are our favourite things people said about them .
And you can follow @ @ @ @ @ @

Twitter
Over on Twitter writer Jill Twiss shared this kitchen roll she bought by accident and it went viral, wildly viral.
‘I accidentally bought inspirational paper towels and I am FURIOUS,’ said @jilltwiss.
And this is why.
Imagine, in the year 2020, writing the words “Give the future a bear hug!” — Jill Twiss (@jilltwiss) September 15, 2020
The worst part is I don't get grocery delivery very often so I ordered TWENTY FOUR ROLLS — Jill Twiss (@jilltwiss) September 15, 2020
And here are our favourite things people said about them.
Stay in your lane, paper towels, you’re not a life coach. — 🗽 Caissie “Pretty Scared, You?” St.Onge (@Caissie) September 15, 2020
i will NOT choose today to be amazing — Jill Twiss (@jilltwiss) September 15, 2020
You have to keep spilling things until they are gone. Just keep spilling. You can get through this. — Ali Davis 🏳🌈 (@Ali_Davis) September 15, 2020
God, I just thought about the poor writer who had to churn out a zillion calculatedly whimsical iterations of these and then get notes from 30 different executives and now I'm so depressed I can barely move. — Ali Davis 🏳🌈 (@Ali_Davis) September 15, 2020
There is something pretty wonderful about using these to clean up cat vomit — Fart to Table (@lizscher) September 15, 2020
There are few things as annoying as unsolicited optimism — Vanessa McKee (@vmenendezb) September 15, 2020
Do they help you absorb the inspiration — Laura Bassett (@LEBassett) September 15, 2020
Boom.
And you can follow @jilltwiss on Twitter here!
READ MORE
9 of Bob Mortimer’s tweets as motivational posters
Source Twitter @jilltwiss


thepoke--2020-09-18--Takedown of the day

Takedown of the day

‘ He ’ s not wrong , ’ says ProductionPlanner over on Reddit .
And just in case you – @ @ @ @ @ t recognise him , the guy on the right a hellfire and damnation preacher called @ @ @ @ @ lot of his time spreading his particular word on college campuses and the like .
@ @ @ @ @ brother Jed !
That was always a fun day on campus .
It usually ended @ @ @ @ @ rally.
’ yw1 ‘ He once told me that masturbation was a sin because semen @ @ @ @ @ shot into a sock .
I then asked him what was wrong with female masturbation @ @ @ @ @ a “ Fire and Brimstone.
” ’ Allen_Koholic “ His assistants carry signs declaring that @ @ @ @ @ those who listen to rock and roll are destined for Hell , along with homosexuals @ @ @ @ @ use tampons , and masturbators ” ( from the Wiki on him ) .
Tampons @ @ @ @

‘He’s not wrong,’ says ProductionPlanner over on Reddit.
And just in case you – like us – didn’t recognise him, the guy on the right a hellfire and damnation preacher called Brother Jed who spends a lot of his time spreading his particular word on college campuses and the like.
‘Ahhh it’s brother Jed! That was always a fun day on campus. It usually ended up like a mini pride rally.’ yw1
‘He once told me that masturbation was a sin because semen was not meant to be shot into a sock. I then asked him what was wrong with female masturbation and all I got was a “Fire and Brimstone.”’ Allen_Koholic
“His assistants carry signs declaring that feminists, liberals, and those who listen to rock and roll are destined for Hell, along with homosexuals, fornicators, those who use tampons, and masturbators” (from the Wiki on him). Tampons?!’ cherry2000-25


thepoke--2020-09-18--‘I used to amuse myself by leaving fake hazard signs around the office’

‘ I used to amuse myself by leaving fake hazard signs around the office , ’ says over on Reddit @ @ @ @ @ my favorite .
Be on alert for… .
Well… .
just be on alert.
’ @ @ @ @ @ coworker ” one is arctic desert cold .
I ’ d be mortified if I @ @ @ @ @ behind my chair.
’ VOMIT_ON_HIS_SWEATER ‘ You should do a CAUTION : SIGN IS BLOCKING @ @ @ @ @ actually thought about making one like that !
My idea was to have it say @ @ @ @ @ ” and then have it be an image of a caution sign .
I ultimately @ @ @ @ @ , after the third person I pitched the concept to told me that they didn @ @ @ @ @ RamsesThePigeon

Pics
‘I used to amuse myself by leaving fake hazard signs around the office,’ says over on Reddit.
“Unknown Hazard” interesting…’ Fuife
‘This one is my favorite. Be on alert for…. Well…. just be on alert.’ LorenaBobbedIt
‘That “farting coworker” one is arctic desert cold. I’d be mortified if I turned around and saw that behind my chair.’ VOMIT_ON_HIS_SWEATER
‘You should do a CAUTION: SIGN IS BLOCKING ENTRANCE.’ Kixtay
‘I actually thought about making one like that! My idea was to have it say “Caution: Yellow Obstacle” and then have it be an image of a caution sign. I ultimately decided against it, though, after the third person I pitched the concept to told me that they didn’t get it.’ RamsesThePigeon
READ MORE
Comedian posts fake healthy eating tips in supermarkets
Source Reddit u/RamsesThePigeon


thepoke--2020-09-18--‘Wife modified a 5-year-old’s birthday card for my brother’s 35th’

Wife modified a 5yo birthday card for my brother ’ s 35th , ’ says luke_and_coley over on Reddit and @ @ @ @ @ .
Hard to believe he got a better card than that one .
‘ I @ @ @ @ @ Ow my back !
‘ yoyomamatoo ‘ I love this , my go-to move for @ @ @ @ @ buy a bunch of cards for ages that all add up to the age of @ @ @ @ @ were out of 35 year old cards but here ’ s a 21 , a @ @ @ @ @ ” ’ lorductape ‘ Buying inappropriate age cards for friends is funnier than any card @ @ @ @ @ nearly every time.
’ way_falrer This might be the perfect birthday card

Pics
Wife modified a 5yo birthday card for my brother’s 35th,’ says luke_and_coley over on Reddit and it’s simply inspired.
Hard to believe he got a better card than that one.
‘I lost it at 35 is Ow my back!‘ yoyomamatoo ‘I lost it at 2 + 2 + 1 + 10 + 20’ Echo127 ‘I love this, my go-to move for buying birthday cards is to buy a bunch of cards for ages that all add up to the age of the person. “They were out of 35 year old cards but here’s a 21, a 9, and a 5….”’ lorductape ‘Buying inappropriate age cards for friends is funnier than any card joke. I do it nearly every time.’ way_falrer
READ MORE
This might be the perfect birthday card
Source Reddit u/luke_and_coley


thepoke--2020-09-18--This restaurant’s response for people who leave picky one-star reviews is simply delicious

This restaurant had the perfect response for customers who make a habit of leaving 1-star reviews .
‘ I know @ @ @ @ @ post is for but unfortunately , even if they read it , they wouldn ’ @ @ @ @ @ this describes them.
’ Nor-easter ‘ “ If you run into an asshole in the @ @ @ @ @ an asshole .
If you run into assholes all day , you ’ re the @ @ @ @ @ separatedbycommas

This restaurant had the perfect response for customers who make a habit of leaving 1-star reviews.
‘I know so many people who this post is for but unfortunately, even if they read it, they wouldn’t be able to acknowledge this describes them.’ Nor-easter
‘“If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day, you’re the asshole.” Raylan Givens’ separatedbycommas


thepoke--2020-09-18--This ‘learning French’ video is 23 seconds well spent

‘ Learning French , ’ says 31esprisi over on Reddit .
Make sure you stick with it to the end @ @ @ @ @ very long … ) It ’ s from @ encorefrenchlessons over on TikTok and here @ @ @ @ @ about it .
‘ Here is a famous one we like to say : Si @ @ @ @ @ , ton tonton sera tondu Which translates to : if my uncle shaves your uncle @ @ @ @ @ shaved.
’ TheArtemisfly This might be the perfect birthday card

Videos
‘Learning French,’ says 31esprisi over on Reddit. Make sure you stick with it to the end (it’s not very long …)
Boom (it’s French for ‘boom’).
It’s from @encorefrenchlessons over on TikTok and here just three things people said about it.
‘See, French is easy.’ EvenList7 ‘Here is a famous one we like to say: Si mon tonton tond ton tonton, ton tonton sera tondu Which translates to: if my uncle shaves your uncle, your uncle will be shaved.’ TheArtemisfly ‘Mûre.’ UndoingMonkey
READ MORE
This might be the perfect birthday card
Source TikTok @encorefrenchlessons Reddit u/31esprisi Image Pixabay YouTube


thepoke--2020-09-18--This might be the perfect birthday card

This might be the perfect birthday card

Just a brilliantly done birthday card shared on Reddit by Sukkuuuu who said : ‘ OMG , this card !
’ And this is why .
‘ Do me a favour .
I couldn ’ t think of anything to write , so please pretend that you ’ re reading something really touching , maybe even wipe away a tear , and then look at me and say , “ That is so beautiful , I didn ’ t know you could write like that.
” Then if anyone asks to see the card , refuse and tell them it @ @ @ @ @ @ @ I owe you one.
’ And just a few of the things people were saying about it .
‘ I gave my wife this card last year !
!
!
She wiped away a tear from her cheek and said , “ But there ’ s no one else here in the room with us .
Idiot.
” ‘ mohammedgoldstein ‘ You forgot to slip a 20 in , to bribe them.
’ mcshark813 ‘ My grandmother did something similar to this on the occasion of my mother ’ s birthday .
The @ @ @ @ @ @ @ my mother opened up the card my Grandma had written , ” I know this is an old card .
Didn ’ t get a chance to get a new one .
Please don ’ t say anything in front of everyone.
” My grandmother has long passed away .
Think my Mom still has the card.
’ Tjbhr

Pics
Just a brilliantly done birthday card shared on Reddit by Sukkuuuu who said: ‘OMG, this card!’
And this is why.
‘Do me a favour. I couldn’t think of anything to write, so please pretend that you’re reading something really touching, maybe even wipe away a tear, and then look at me and say, “That is so beautiful, I didn’t know you could write like that.” Then if anyone asks to see the card, refuse and tell them it was just too personal. Thanks, I owe you one.’
And just a few of the things people were saying about it.
‘I gave my wife this card last year!!! She wiped away a tear from her cheek and said, “But there’s no one else here in the room with us. Idiot.”‘ mohammedgoldstein ‘You forgot to slip a 20 in, to bribe them.’ mcshark813 ‘My grandmother did something similar to this on the occasion of my mother’s birthday. The card was an old one. When my mother opened up the card my Grandma had written, ” I know this is an old card. Didn’t get a chance to get a new one. Please don’t say anything in front of everyone.” My grandmother has long passed away. Think my Mom still has the card.’ Tjbhr
READ MORE
‘My astrophysicist daughter gave me a birthday card’
Source Reddit u/Sukkuuuu


thepoke--2020-09-18--People enjoyed this restaurant’s flaming takedowns of negative customer reviews

We ’ ve occasionally featured shops and restaurants that have responded in brilliant style to customers ’ unfair reviews .
@ @ @ @ @ of the genre .
It was shared on Twitter by @ demarionunn and , well @ @ @ @ @ yourself .
This guy left a petty one-star review but ended up making a grovelling @

Pics
We’ve occasionally featured shops and restaurants that have responded in brilliant style to customers’ unfair reviews. And these are a classic of the genre.
They were shared on Twitter by @demarionunn and, well, have a read for yourself.
1.
2.
3.
4.
Boom.
He should get a trip advisor plaque for this — Nil (@Nilinho_whu) September 17, 2020
READ MORE
This guy left a petty one-star review but ended up making a grovelling apology
Source Twitter @demarionunn Image Pexels


thepoke--2020-09-18--25 delightfully covid-free funny tweets from this week

Forget about curfews , tests and masks – just give yourself five minutes ’ peace to read some of the @ @ @ @ @ week .
The 25 funniest tweets of the week

Twitter
Forget about curfews, tests and masks – just give yourself five minutes’ peace to read some of the funniest tweets from the past week.
Enjoy.
1.
Jurrasic Park passes the Bechdel test because all the dinosaurs are girls and they talk to each other about eating people — Lauren Schwein (@laurenschwein) September 12, 2020
2.
I always be overthinking these pic.twitter.com/58ZzOKmdkS — Ｔｒａｆｆｉｃ ｊａｍｍｅｒ (@uwaiis__) September 15, 2020
3.
Startup idea: a Peloton but you can ride it outdoors — Sheeta Verma 🍂🍁🎃 (@sheetaverma) September 15, 2020
4.
Sometimes I’m kept awake thinking about how Americans call the liquid they put into their cars gas — steeve again (@steeve_again) September 13, 2020
5.
Captain Hook refuses to sign up for TikTok because it terrifies him — Michael | Black Lives Matter (@Home_Halfway) September 11, 2020
6.
dad? did you have a podcast? pic.twitter.com/TDuaqRgL4h — kevin 😎 (@kevinsorboalt) September 15, 2020
7.
i sit with my daughter while she falls asleep and i always whisper “i love you” in her ear as soon as she falls asleep& she says “i love you too” well tonight we had a little argument before she fell asleep i still whispered “i love you” & all she whispered back was “good” LMFAO — CeciATL (@CeciATL) September 10, 2020
8.
If spiders are more scared of me than I am of them what fuck are they doing in my fucking house? — Sooz Kempner (@SoozUK) September 13, 2020
9.
this writing lark looks straightforward pic.twitter.com/BLZfSOoE6b — joe (@mutablejoe) September 16, 2020
10.
He drinks a whiskey drink
He drinks a vodka drink
He drinks a taco drink
He drinks a pizza drink – me with a broken jaw — Village Person (@SvnSxty) September 16, 2020
11.
Her: What we doing tonight?
Him: Call your mate & tell her to get dolled up.
It's gonna be fucking mental pic.twitter.com/1xL6qpwKpx — joe heenan (@joeheenan) September 14, 2020
12.
Bitter disappointment today. 4 year old thought we were taking a day out to see a zebra for lunch. We are seeing my friend, Deborah. — Alexandra Page (@alexandrapage) September 12, 2020
13.
I tried to buy a Nerf gun in France and ended up with eight more than I wanted — Toby Earle (@TobyonTV) September 14, 2020
14.
Friend: I saw this guy he looks just like you! Me: Please dont Friend: No I’m serious you guys are twins Me: This is never flattering please just shut up Friend: Look, I took a picture Me: Man this is an old tire full of water Friend: You guys are identical! — jon drake (@DrakeGatsby) September 17, 2020
15.
In the UK, this show was called CRiSPs pic.twitter.com/EbMrLzS2nz — Dan McDaid (@danmcdaid) September 13, 2020
16.
[marketing meeting]
Me: shamcum
Board: no
Me: shampiss
Board: no
Me: shamblood
*an hour later*
Me: shampoo
Board: ok yes fine — David Hughes (@david8hughes) September 14, 2020
17.
Never have I related more to a biscuit. pic.twitter.com/34H2DMBIt4 — Scott Bryan (@scottygb) September 14, 2020
18.
My kids are so well trained. They come straight down for dinner as soon as they hear the smoke alarm. — Jayne Sharp (@Jaynesharp) September 14, 2020
19.
“Fuck the rules. It’s 1842. I’ll write anything I want to on my house.” pic.twitter.com/HHvUUV79Ks — Tom Cox (@cox_tom) September 14, 2020
20.
I worry about Steps reforming. These things can escalate. — Robin Flavell (@RobinFlavell) September 15, 2020
21.
Fen diagram pic.twitter.com/QoJgNXWhcS — David M Barnett (@davidmbarnett) September 14, 2020
22.
When I was younger I always wanted to be a web designer, or as we called them back then, a spider. — Tony Cowards (@TonyCowards) September 13, 2020
23.
I had a goat's cheese sandwich for lunch today. Well, he should have put his name on it. — GlennyRodge (@GlennyRodge) September 15, 2020
24.
25.
What if we got rid of Facebook (destructive) and instead just created one big excel sheet with everyone's birthdays (helpful)? — Allison Raskin (@AllisonRaskin) September 15, 2020
READ MORE
The 25 funniest tweets of the week
Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-09-18--They really didn’t think through this pub sign’s design

In the first of an occasional series , unfortunate pub sign of the week goes to … ‘ CUT THE @ @ @ @ @ evren__7 who shared it on Twitter .

Pics
In the first of an occasional series, unfortunate pub sign of the week goes to …
‘CUT THE PUBE,’ said @evren__7 who shared it on Twitter.
what could the actual name of this possibly be? cube puth? — online nobody (@online_nobody) September 17, 2020
It’s gotta be Cube: The Pub which is almost as bad as the sign — Matt Barrentine (@MrBarrentine) September 17, 2020
CubePube — Amalgamated Sloths ™ (@SeattleSloth_) September 17, 2020
READ MORE
Poke Challenge: Bad Pub Signs
Source @evren__7


thepoke--2020-09-18--Van Morrison’s written 3 anti-lockdown songs – these 13 takedowns all hit the right note

The anti-masker supergroup , such as it is , has got a new member .
Joining Ian Brown and Noel Gallagher is Van Morrison , who refuses to wear a mask to help combat the pandemic and doesn ’ t believe anyone else should have to wear one either .
The singer described the government as “ fascist bullies disturbing our peace ” and feels so strongly , we ’ re sorry to say , he ’ s written three songs about it .
Here ’ s a sample lyric from one of them , called No More Lockdown .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ government overreach / No more fascist bullies / Disturbing our peace … “ No more taking of our freedom / And our God-given rights / Pretending it ’ s for our safety / When it ’ s really to enslave … ” Here ’ s what he said in a statement .
“ I ’ m not telling people what to do or think , ” he said in a statement .
“ The government is doing a great job of that already .
It ’ s about freedom of choice .
I @ @ @ @ @ @ @ think for themselves.
” And here are our favourite things people said about it .
The 15 funniest band names people suggested for Ian Brown and Noel Gallagher

News
The anti-masker supergroup, such as it is, has got a new member. Joining Ian Brown and Noel Gallagher is Van Morrison, who refuses to wear a mask to help combat the pandemic and doesn’t believe anyone else should have to wear one either.
The singer described the government as “fascist bullies disturbing our peace” and feels so strongly, we’re sorry to say, he’s written three songs about it.
Here’s a sample lyric from one of them, called No More Lockdown.
“No more lockdown / No more government overreach / No more fascist bullies / Disturbing our peace … “No more taking of our freedom / And our God-given rights / Pretending it’s for our safety / When it’s really to enslave …”
Here’s what he said in a statement.
“I’m not telling people what to do or think,” he said in a statement. “The government is doing a great job of that already. It’s about freedom of choice. I believe people should have the right to think for themselves.”
And here are our favourite things people said about it.
1.
Protest Singers; a synopsis.
Billie Holiday: Racism
Edwin Starr: War
Bob Dylan: Injustice
Bob Marley: Inequality
N.W.A: Police Brutality
Woody Guthrie: Fascism
Ian Brown/Liam Gallagher/Van Morrison: Cotton masks/being inside for a bit — David J. Court (@DavidJCourt) September 18, 2020
2.
Well it's a marvellous night for a loon rant https://t.co/7stGLShwn3 — John Maguire (@JMaguireCritic) September 18, 2020
3.
"Covid All Stars Tour: Van Morrison on vocals, Gallaher on guitar, Jim Corr on bass, Ian Brown guesting on the bongos" pic.twitter.com/oslwQO3fuB — Memorial Device (@memorialdevice) September 18, 2020
4.
Possible Van Morrison lyrics…
“Hey, where did masks go?
Days when the plagues came
No social distancing
Playin' a daft game
Coughin and a wheezin hey, hey
Spreading and infecting
On a hospital ventilator with
Our hearts a stoppin' and you, my… 5G girl” https://t.co/DGhrAOuaPZ — Sarah O'Connell (@SarahO_Connell) September 18, 2020
5.
I imagine these new Van Morrison songs will be a popular choice at the funerals of anti-maskers. https://t.co/chQ20xoLEc — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) September 18, 2020
6.
My Brown Lunged Girl https://t.co/pdooaAo28H — pixelatedboat aka “mr tweets” (@pixelatedboat) September 18, 2020
7.
Have I Told You Irately https://t.co/kgM5ulQ7l2 — Mrs Gladys Steptoe (@GladysSteptoe) September 18, 2020
8.
This Van Morrison thing has come as a shock eh? If only there had been some clue over the last 50 years, however slight, that in addition to being a musical visionary and spiritual seeker he was a grumpy crank. — Andy Miller (@i_am_mill_i_am) September 18, 2020
9.
Jackie Wilson Said (I'm In Heaven Because You Didn't Mask Up)
Brown Lunged Girl
Astral Wheeze https://t.co/9vU6xJUD4i — Simon Price (@simon_price01) September 18, 2020
10.
https://twitter.com/callummay/status/1306842937519730702?s=20
11.
It's the age old question, isn't it? Who to believe – practically every epidemiologist on Earth, or a superannuated pop miseryguts. https://t.co/zt65Dq2iSZ — Michael Moran (@TheMichaelMoran) September 18, 2020
12.
Van Morrison’s full name is Unmarked Van Full Of Wet Eggs Being Delivered To Morrison’s #BangOnTheZeitgeist pic.twitter.com/1ziBvBDl8z — Alistair Coleman (@alistaircoleman) September 18, 2020
13.
White Van Morrison https://t.co/fRRpLNzaMT — Public Benjamin (@PublicBenjamin) September 18, 2020
READ MORE
The 15 funniest band names people suggested for Ian Brown and Noel Gallagher
Image screengrab


thepoke--2020-09-18--The Daily Star’s front page knocked it out of the park again

The Daily Star ’ s had a run of memorable front pages of late , and today ’ s was @ @ @ @ @ And just in case you missed them , or fancy a reminder , here are @ @ @ @ @ front pages that totally hit the mark .
The head of Test and Trace says @ @ @ @ @ unexpected – 11 favourite reactions

Pics
The Daily Star’s had a run of memorable front pages of late, and today’s was another for the collection.
And just in case you missed them, or fancy a reminder, here are a few other Daily Star front pages that totally hit the mark.
READ MORE
The head of Test and Trace says the rise in demand was unexpected – 11 favourite reactions
Source @hendopolis


thepoke--2020-09-18--14 of the funniest comments on what’s going on with the coronavirus

The North East of England has now entered a coronavirus quarantine that will see bars and restaurants close at 10 @ @ @ @ @ that coronavirus comes on shift , so that should work .
Lockdowns , testing and @ @ @ @ @ funny coronavirus jokes from Twitter .

Twitter
The North East of England has now entered a coronavirus quarantine that will see bars and restaurants close at 10, which is the time that coronavirus comes on shift, so that should work.
Lockdowns, testing and Christmas feature in these very funny coronavirus jokes from Twitter.
1.
To be fair, we shouldn’t expect Johnson and Hancock to supply perfect answers to complex health problems. They’re not qualified medical experts; which is why they’ve brought in specialists like the former head of TalkTalk and accountancy firm Accenture. — Armando Iannucci (@Aiannucci) September 18, 2020
2.
I see no.10 have learnt from being totally unprepared for the exams debacle which everybody saw coming by being totally unprepared for the testing debacle which everybody saw coming 🙄#peston #newsnight — dave ❄ 🥕 🧻 (@davemacladd) September 16, 2020
3.
Logging on to the government covid test website like I’m trying to get tickets for fucking Glastonbury — James Felton (@JimMFelton) September 18, 2020
4.
i’m really getting my money’s worth on rent this year — erin chack (@ErinChack) June 26, 2020
5.
Can't call it a 'nationwide' lockdown if you just name the counties one by one. pic.twitter.com/BftvOYRVIT — Mitten d'Amour (@MittenDAmour) September 17, 2020
6.
Three live comedy gigs that were booked in for the Autumn have all been pulled today due to COVID/lockdown fears. I might re-train in a job that’s naturally socially distanced from society like a telegraph pole fixer, Arctic researcher or Jim Davidson’s agent. — Tiernan Douieb (@TiernanDouieb) September 17, 2020
7.


thepoke--2020-09-18--Fiona Bruce demolished this Tory MP’s inflated testing figures – the only 5 reactions you need

Question Time is back , and Thursday ’ s Oldham episode saw Tory MP Nadhim Zahawi try to convince people @ @ @ @ @ 240,000 people for coronavirus every day .
Luckily , Fiona Bruce was on it .
@ @ @ @ @ .

Videos
Question Time is back, and Thursday’s Oldham episode saw Tory MP Nadhim Zahawi try to convince people that the UK is testing 240,000 people for coronavirus every day.
Luckily, Fiona Bruce was on it.
“I’m not trying to hide away from the challenges, we’ve got to do even better.” “If you can’t get a test, it doesn’t matter what the capacity is.” @nadhimzahawi is questioned by Fiona Bruce over the UK’s Covid testing figures. #bbcqt pic.twitter.com/iocYDMremu — BBC Question Time (@bbcquestiontime) September 17, 2020
These five reactions nailed it.
1.
Nadhim Zahawi blatantly lying about the number of tests being carried out.
And gets BEAUTIFULLY called out by Fiona Bruce!#BBCqt @nadhimzahawi pic.twitter.com/ar8OvZDEY3 — Femi (@Femi_Sorry) September 17, 2020
2.
Nadhim Zahawi explaining how the testing of 81,000 people a day is best referred to as '240,000 tests a day'. #bbcqt pic.twitter.com/pLIiQ4L7hQ — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) September 17, 2020
3.
Ignore Fiona Bruce saying 81,000. Nadhim Zahawi is right. We *are* doing 240,000 tests a day. In the same way that the Brexit deal is “oven ready”, our track and trace system is “world-beating” and our Covid response a “massive success”. pic.twitter.com/EnVn4v4pFo — David Schneider (@davidschneider) September 18, 2020
4.
Pants on fucking fire https://t.co/r0kEQze27H — MorpheusNI (@MorpheusNI) September 17, 2020
5.
This shit would've been big news 5 years ago. Its sad how desensitised we are https://t.co/h9kQcbz6dK — ezie (@liveezie) September 17, 2020
This Robert Jenrick parody had a conclusion.
God bless Nadim Zahawi! If we asked him, he'd go out there and defend Boris for barbecuing the elderly. #bbcqt — Robert Jenrick Parody (@Robert_Jenrick) September 17, 2020
READ MORE
Question Time is temporarily ditching the audience – 7 biting responses
Source Question Time Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-09-18--Hina the Shiba Inu has a talent for ‘ruining’ group photos – 12 of her funniest poses

Instagrammer yokokikuchi_ks has four beautiful Shiba Inu dogs , Kikko , Sasha , Momo and Hina .
Hina , the @ @ @ @ @ baby of the bunch , as you can see from this lovely photo of the @ @ @ @ @ every dog can be perfect at posing for photos , and Hina has shown time @ @ @ @ @ doesn ’ t take much to ruin – or is that improve ?
– a @ @ @ @ @ some very funny examples .
To prove she can get it right when she wants @ @ @ @ @ Hina on her birthday in August .
Go and check out the rest of their @ @ @ @ @ face of this dog not given the snack it was expecting is an absolute peach

Pics
Instagrammer yokokikuchi_ks has four beautiful Shiba Inu dogs, Kikko, Sasha, Momo and Hina.
Hina, the white one, is the baby of the bunch, as you can see from this lovely photo of the canine family.
But not every dog can be perfect at posing for photos, and Hina has shown time and time again that it doesn’t take much to ruin – or is that improve? – a group photo.
Here are some very funny examples.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
To prove she can get it right when she wants to, here’s Hina on her birthday in August.
Finally – it isn’t always Hina …
Go and check out the rest of their album on Instagram.
READ MORE
The face of this dog not given the snack it was expecting is an absolute peach
Source Instagram Image Instagram


thepoke--2020-09-18--A covidiot tried to use statistics to make an outrageous claim – the takedown was incredibly satisfy

A covidiot tried to use statistics to make an outrageous claim – the takedown was incredibly satisfying

If there ’ s one thing that seems to connect all the covidiots making grand statements on the internet , @ @ @ @ @ arguments can be completely destroyed with facts .
One coronavirus conspiracy theorist tried to use @ @ @ @ @ argument – and it went very badly for them .
We have Reddit user Ben69420 @ @ @ @ @ .
This was their claim .
NB – NSFW .
And this was the splendid @ @ @ @ @ It started with an explanation of why the numbers must be incorrect .
There was @ @ @ @ @ would also have to be true if the covidiot were right .
It ended with @ @ @ @ @ the death rate just went up .
The “ murderer ” may have found themselves @ @ @ @ @ they spotted this response from u/Brownskikuca .

Weird World
If there’s one thing that seems to connect all the covidiots making grand statements on the internet, it’s that their arguments can be completely destroyed with facts.
One coronavirus conspiracy theorist tried to use statistics to back up their argument – and it went very badly for them. We have Reddit user Ben69420 to thank for the screengrab.
This was their claim. NB – NSFW.
And this was the splendid dissection of the statistics.
It started with an explanation of why the numbers must be incorrect.
There was a list of things that would also have to be true if the covidiot were right.
It ended with this insult.
Looks like the death rate just went up.
An absolute murder by incineration
kokoyumyum
The “murderer” may have found themselves a new career, if they spotted this response from u/Brownskikuca .
Where can I hire a word hitman? I need to despatch a science denier.
READ MORE
Covidiot of the Day
Source r/MurderedByWords Image r/MurderedByWords, Chris Liverani on Unsplash


thepoke--2020-09-18--This Kylie Jenner video is so much better with a hilarious Yorkshire overdub

Comedian and impressionist , Steff Todd , has achieved the almost impossible – she ’ s made Kylie Jenner ’ @ @ @ @ @ office entertaining , and she ’ s done it with a hilarious overdub .
This @ @ @ @ @ winner from Yorkshire .
With Keeping Up With the Kardashians finally set to end , @ @ @ @ @ and fill the gap .
Here are a few reactions from Twitter .
As a @ @ @ @ @ some more of Steff ’ s Yorkshire Kardashians .
Someone in TV commissioning needs to @ @ @ @ @ Jenner woke her baby by singing Rise and Shine and the internet lost its sh*t

Videos
Comedian and impressionist, Steff Todd, has achieved the almost impossible – she’s made Kylie Jenner’s video tour of her office more entertaining, and she’s done it with a hilarious overdub.
This is Kylie as a scratchcard winner from Yorkshire.
With Keeping Up With the Kardashians finally set to end, perhaps Steff can step in and fill the gap.
Here are a few reactions from Twitter.
why am i so obsessed with this https://t.co/PolrWOnQOI — pilbeam (@empilbeam) September 17, 2020
I cannot stop watching this. It's perfect. https://t.co/fpNZssGlnZ — Chris McCrudden (@cmccrudden) September 16, 2020
I’m PISSING at this hahaaha — wap rem x (@jackremmington) September 15, 2020
As a bonus, here’s some more of Steff’s Yorkshire Kardashians.
Someone in TV commissioning needs to snap this up.
READ MORE
Kylie Jenner woke her baby by singing Rise and Shine and the internet lost its sh*t
Source Steff Todd Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-09-18--The head of Test and Trace says the rise  in demand was unexpected – 11 favourite reactions

The head of the UK ’ s Test and Trace programme , Dido Harding , was called before a parliamentary @ @ @ @ @ problems it has been experiencing .
This was her explanation of how she came to @ @ @ @ @ And she responded to the outcry against the huge shortfall in available tests with this @ @ @ @ @ s funny that so many people were saying there ’ d be a shortage of @ @ @ @ @ .
That ’ s one of your bona fide mysteries , that is .
He @ @ @ @ @ person not buying it .

Twitter
The head of the UK’s Test and Trace programme, Dido Harding, was called before a parliamentary select committee to explain the problems it has been experiencing.
The last time I watched Dido Harding at a Commons Select Committee, it was to explain why all her Talk Talk customers' data had been stolen by two 15 year old boys. Still, she's a Tory peer now, and will shortly explain how well everything's going with her Test and Trace app. — Tom Peck (@tompeck) September 17, 2020
This was her explanation of how she came to be in the post.
Dido Harding confirming the tough interview process she had to endure to become the head of NHS Test & trace which was "some ministers asked me if I wanted to do it and I said yes" 🙄 — dave ❄ 🥕 🧻 (@davemacladd) September 17, 2020
Her evidence didn’t always make complete sense.
Did Dido Harding just say this sentence?
“No system will ever run near to capacity….in fact, some of our labs are running over 100% capacity”. ?!? — Dr Dominic Pimenta (@juniordrblog) September 17, 2020
And she responded to the outcry against the huge shortfall in available tests with this incredible statement.
Coronavirus: Head of Test and Trace says rise in demand for COVID tests wasn't expected https://t.co/5yTZffJqj3 — SkyNews (@SkyNews) September 17, 2020
It’s funny that so many people were saying there’d be a shortage of tests when nobody expected it. That’s one of your bona fide mysteries, that is.
As James O’Brien put it –
Go back to the workplace, go back to school. All the testing will make it as safe as can be… …Nobody knew that demand for testing would rise this much. It’s almost trite to point it out but Dido Harding is one of those ‘unelected bureaucrats’ we used to hear so much about. — James O'Brien (@mrjamesob) September 17, 2020
He wasn’t the only person not buying it.
1.
This shit gvt: time to go back to school & uni & offices!!
Us: but… Rona?
Gvt: haha it's fine! Get off yer bums! Can kids even GET Rona?? Maybe not!!
✨3 weeks later ✨ https://t.co/nUjtA5ghdn — Gee Aitch Cee (@Scriblit) September 17, 2020
2.
Dido Harding, Head of Test and Trace: "no one was expecting the rise in demand for tests"
I too am shocked that telling everyone to get back to work, school and university would lead to this. https://t.co/Uf8h4yApHq — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) September 17, 2020
3.
You had one job… https://t.co/Ei03rBySAZ — Sophia Sleigh (@SophiaSleigh) September 17, 2020
4.
Head of Forestry Commission says rise in amount of bear shit after hibernation wasn't expected. https://t.co/yrYyrnCFep — Pundamentalism (@Pundamentalism) September 17, 2020
5.


thepoke--2020-09-18--These ‘next level’ face masks had the entire internet shaking its head

Most people are happy to wear a face mask when required in these unprecedented times .
A small and very @ @ @ @ @ But there ’ s one thing we can surely all agree on .
These aren @ @ @ @ @ are they ?
And here they are in close-up .
Quite a few people couldn @ @ @ @ @ possibly be real but if it ’ s a joke , then it ’ s @ @ @ @ @ Here ’ s a bit more from the website .
Apparently they ’ ve got @ @ @ @ @ mask fog free and more than 4 hours battery life !
And just in case @ @ @ @ @ cost $ 199 each .
And here ’ s exactly what people made of all @ @ @ @ @ to use statistics to make an outrageous claim – the takedown was incredibly satisfying

Weird World
Most people are happy to wear a face mask when required in these unprecedented times. A small and very vocal minority do not.
But there’s one thing we can surely all agree on. These aren’t the answer … are they?
I don’t know how to feel anymore. pic.twitter.com/94eUlF6uHa — Bryan Wants To Make A Difference (@BreatheNewWinds) September 17, 2020
And here they are in close-up.
Quite a few people couldn’t believe they could possibly be real but if it’s a joke, then it’s a fairly elaborate one.
Here’s a bit more from the website.
Apparently they’ve got special fans which keep the mask fog free and more than 4 hours battery life! And just in case you were wondering, they cost $199 each.
And here’s exactly what people made of all that.
This is the market solution to climate change and air pollution. https://t.co/F9hNDSyRXd — Has Jeff Bezos Decided To End World Hunger? (@HasBezosDecided) September 18, 2020
Space suits for living on earth. Something is wrong. — Asger Aabenhus (@asgeraabenhus) September 17, 2020
I say this all the time, but the second they got us to buy bottled water it was over for us. This was inevitable. Every dystopian sci fi ever warned us about this, and yet here we are. — Hi, it’s your friend Dan. (@TheDannyFresh) September 17, 2020
ok new plan what if we had a civil war just against the people who invented and buy this https://t.co/H7fByYntPK — Robert Evans (The Only Robert Evans) (@IwriteOK) September 18, 2020
Sweaty. You feel sweaty. pic.twitter.com/pjDFWCtkBG — Zorg The Conqueror (@Zorg_Conqueror) September 17, 2020
I want one with one way glass https://t.co/XIZyKC0zRV — Cowsey Explosion (@CaseyExplosion) September 18, 2020
This is ugly. At least Daft Punk had an aesthetic. pic.twitter.com/GFRIxUcEhg — 🎃👻👻 Tony BOO-loney 👻👻🎃 (@tonysonartanim) September 17, 2020
Ripping a fat vape cloud and choking to death inside my mass effect helmet https://t.co/G5ZzGvHfKI — Ash (@AshBCoffin) September 17, 2020
Capitalists pic.twitter.com/rfIgGdoY8B — Bryan Wants To Make A Difference (@BreatheNewWinds) September 17, 2020
To conclude …
Is this a joke? — 🔻Papash – 0 to 71!🔻 (@0Papash) September 17, 2020
Only if you consider 2020 the punch line — Bryan Wants To Make A Difference (@BreatheNewWinds) September 17, 2020
READ MORE
A covidiot tried to use statistics to make an outrageous claim – the takedown was incredibly satisfying
Source @BreatheNewWinds


thepoke--2020-09-19--Winding Guardian readers up in the comments is childish but funny

The Guardian recently featured a column written entirely by a robot to We asked GPT-3 , OpenAI ’ s powerful @ @ @ @ @ write an essay for us from scratch .
The assignment ?
To convince us robots @ @ @ @ @ they said .
And you can read the full article here .
We ’ re @ @ @ @ @ we ’ re here for this childish but funny exchange in the comments .
Suckered @ @ @ @ @ , ’ said ConduciveMammal over on Reddit .
Very possibly that was a robot too @ @ @ @ @ .
Full disclosure : I am also a robot .
And while we ’ re @ @ @ @ @ enjoy once again this robot video with a Scottish voiceover .
Maybe he wrote it @ @ @ @ @ – and sweary – robot vacuum cleaner you ’ ll see this week

Weird World
The Guardian recently featured a column written entirely by a robot as part of its coverage of artificial intelligence and all that. Very interesting it was too (you can read the full article here).
We’re not here for that, we’re here for this childish but funny exchange in the comments.
‘Suckered by uncle’s predictions,’ said ConduciveMammal over on Reddit.
Maybe that was a robot as well.
And while we’re here, any excuse to enjoy once again this robot video given a Scottish voiceover.
READ MORE
Probably the most relatable – and sweary – robot vacuum cleaner you’ll see this week
Source Reddit u/ConduciveMammal


thepoke--2020-09-19--Covidiot taken down with his own logic

Covidiot taken down with his own logic

Contender for facepalm of the week is this exchange , shared by Redditor pointbreak300 who said : ‘ I mean @ @ @ @ @ exactly what they mean .
‘ Never met anyone who died in ww1 , this @ @ @ @ @ t happen… ’ arizonatasteslike ‘ Never met a dinosaur who died in a mass extinction @ @ @ @ @ didn ’ t happen .
Isn ’ t that right , Mr. Rex .
Huh @ @ @ @ @ I forgot to take my meds today .
You need to lay off the cheese.
@ @

Contender for facepalm of the week is this exchange, shared by Redditor pointbreak300 who said: ‘I mean …’ and you know exactly what they mean.
‘Never met anyone who died in ww1, this probably means it didn’t happen…’ arizonatasteslike
‘Never met a dinosaur who died in a mass extinction event, probably means it didn’t happen. Isn’t that right, Mr. Rex. Huh, what do you mean I forgot to take my meds today. You need to lay off the cheese.’ Hopeless_Slayer


thepoke--2020-09-19--These Argos curtains look uncannily like a pack of 10 giant cigarettes

Argos has been roundly mocked on Twitter for selling these curtains which look like , well , have a gander @ @ @ @ @ was in any doubt exactly what they looked like .
Draw your curtains .
Draw @ @ @ @ @ total sense .
Just hope they ’ re not flammable .

Pics
Argos has been roundly mocked on Twitter for selling these curtains which look like, well, have a gander for yourself.
And no-one was in any doubt exactly what they looked like.
Argos selling jps players super king for curtains hahahahahahaha aye right pic.twitter.com/qoKm2O5CXN — toal (@RyaanToal) September 16, 2020
For just £5.99 you can have a pack of Superking cigarettes as curtains pic.twitter.com/j7bmDhjzTO — James Cusack (@JamesCusack) September 17, 2020
I used to have these then I started draping https://t.co/kf0NxhO2b1 — David O. Gray (@DavidGrayMatter) September 17, 2020
Draw your curtains. Draw on a cigarette. Makes total sense. Just hope they’re not flammable.
H/T Indy100


thepoke--2020-09-19--Dad joke of the day

Dad joke of the day

This dad waited 28 years to take sweet revenge on his son and it 's brilliant

Pics
Very possibly you can see what’s coming. ‘LOL boomer humour,’ said TheOneYe who shared it over on Reddit.
READ MORE
Simply 23 brilliantly terrible dad jokes that are guaranteed to take the edge off
Source Reddit u/TheOneYe


thepoke--2020-09-19--This dad waited 28 years to take sweet revenge on his son and it’s brilliant

Love this story shared by @ robwitts on Twitter of how his dad took sweet revenge on him with a @ @ @ @ @ once made for him for his 42nd birthday .
And here it is in close-up @ @ @ @ @ fair , it wasn ’ t quite as simple as that .
Still love it @ @ @

Pics
Love this story shared by @robwitts on Twitter of how his dad took sweet revenge on him with a homemade card he made for his 42nd birthday.
He waited 28 years to do this …
Fair play to my dad sending me the sarky card I made for his 42nd birthday, astonishing commitment to karmic justice pic.twitter.com/1JdzUskGco — Rob Witts is staying home (@robwitts) September 10, 2020
And here it is in close-up.
Brilliantly done.
How old were you when you made it? How many years was the plot brewing? — Ish (@ishferris) September 10, 2020
I would have been 14, so he's been sitting on this for 28 years 🙃 — Rob Witts is staying home (@robwitts) September 11, 2020
Although, to be fair, it wasn’t quite as simple as that.
OK, full disclosure: I just got off the phone with my mum, and the card was in a box in the loft that they happened to open recently. My dad has *not* been planning this for years! However he is, as many people have observed, a great dad ❤ pic.twitter.com/goPXWv9wP3 — Rob Witts is staying home (@robwitts) September 11, 2020
Still love it, though.
I prefer this version though https://t.co/XuFvaVrBjQ — Rob Witts is staying home (@robwitts) September 11, 2020
READ MORE
‘Wife modified a 5-year-old’s birthday card for my brother’s 35th’
Source @robwitt H/T Reddit u/abzonline


thepoke--2020-09-19--This Bill Gates conspiracy theory got entirely the response it deserved

There ’ s a subReddit called ‘ murdered by words ’ which is presumably entirely explanatory .
And this response to a conspiracy theory about Bill Gates is a prime example of the satisfying takedown .
‘ If I was Bill Gates I ’ d just tell the world to go get bent , I ’ m done with all this garbage , ’ said beerbellybegone who shared it on Reddit .
And there ’ s a whole load more about exactly what Bill Gates meant – and how his words have been twisted – on fact checking site , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ just refuse to be convinced .
‘ Explained this to a moron a while back and their reply was : ‘ tomato , tomato.
’ That ’ s it , when explaining what they got so drastically wrong by gaining their information from memes , that ’ s the only comeback they had .
This pandemic has revealed that a large swathe of the global population are educationally subnormal morons who somehow have managed to function this far in life.
’ morebucks23 More than 100 people complained the BBC was biased in favour @ @ @ @ @ @ @ need

Weird World
There’s a subReddit called ‘murdered by words’ which is presumably entirely explanatory. And this response to a conspiracy theory about Bill Gates is a prime example of the satisfying takedown.
‘If I was Bill Gates I’d just tell the world to go get bent, I’m done with all this garbage,’ said beerbellybegone who shared it on Reddit.
And there’s a whole load more about exactly what Bill Gates meant – and how his words have been twisted – on fact checking site, Snopes.
Some people, however, just refuse to be convinced.
‘Explained this to a moron a while back and their reply was: ‘tomato, tomato.’ That’s it, when explaining what they got so drastically wrong by gaining their information from memes, that’s the only comeback they had. This pandemic has revealed that a large swathe of the global population are educationally subnormal morons who somehow have managed to function this far in life.’ morebucks23
READ MORE
More than 100 people complained the BBC was biased in favour of vaccinations – only 4 replies you need
Source Reddit u/beerbellybegone


thepoke--2020-09-20--Geordie Yvette Cooper has had enough of Matt Hancock’s nonsense (NSFW)

Actor and voice artist , Fergus Craig , has given Yvette Cooper the chance to say how she really feels @ @ @ @ @ hilarious and absolutely not safe for work Geordie overdub .
The Honourable Member for Pontefract @ @ @ @ @ want to say those things , but we ’ re certain plenty of others do @ @ @ @ @ couple of reactions to the very funny parody .
Plus one that truly speaks for @ @ @ @ @ speech wiped the floor of the Commons with Boris Johnson – 11 ayes to the @

Videos
Actor and voice artist, Fergus Craig, has given Yvette Cooper the chance to say how she really feels – probably – with this hilarious and absolutely not safe for work Geordie overdub.
Geordie Yvette Cooper versus Matt Hancock. pic.twitter.com/shrneNQ1HT — Fergus Craig (@FergusCraig) September 17, 2020
The Honourable Member for Pontefract and Castleford may not really want to say those things, but we’re certain plenty of others do.
Here are just a couple of reactions to the very funny parody.
When Matt Hancock started speaking I spat my coffee across my desk 🤣 — Sarah Burr (@SarahEHBurr) September 18, 2020
Brilliant! 😂👏 — Graham Kellas (@RealGKK) September 17, 2020
Plus one that truly speaks for us.
I’ve watched this a lot of times, it makes me happy. — Stickman3000 (@Stickman30001) September 18, 2020
As a bonus, here’s Geordie Ed Miliband.
Geordie Ed Miliband versus Boris Johnson. pic.twitter.com/3BDiFNC85H — Fergus Craig (@FergusCraig) September 17, 2020
READ MORE
This Ed Miliband speech wiped the floor of the Commons with Boris Johnson – 11 ayes to the right
Source Fergus Craig Image Screengrab, Screengrab


thepoke--2020-09-20--Simply 22 fascinating film details you probably missed

The subreddit r/MovieDetails is an ever-growing collection of trivia about films , including hidden in-jokes or Easter eggs we may have missed and facts behind the creation of the films .
We trawled through it so you don ’ t have to and picked out some belters .
1 .
In the beginning of Joker ( 2019 ) there ’ s a familiar face in the mirror 2 .
Men in Black ( 1997 ) – the language these aliens speak together is ‘ Huttese ’ , the language Jabba the Hutt speaks in the Star Wars films .
3 @ @ @ @ @ @ @ when they counted the people for the trip they say there ’ s 17 people in total .
An odd number between two vans means they will be split 8/9 .
Since Kevin was missing both vans had 8 people instead , making each group assume they were on the 8-people van , not suspecting a thing 4 .
In The Matrix ( 1999 ) the way Neo and Morpheus attack each other with the same move , their clothes and head/hair forms the Yin-Yang Symbol 5 .
In Ratatouille ( 2007 ) @ @ @ @ @ @ @ designed by Chef Thomas Keller .
It ’ s a real recipe .
It takes at least four hours to make .
6 .
In Titanic , Jack tells Rose that he went ice fishing on Lake Wissota in Wisconsin , which was formed in 1917 by the creation of a hydroelectric dam on the Chippewa River , five years after the Titanic sank .
7 .
In “ Hercules ” ( 1997 ) Hades says “ Guys , relax .
It ’ s only half-time ” exactly at the 46-minute mark , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ 8 .
In 6 Underground ( 2019 ) at 14:42 you can see Ryan Reynolds recording a video for his social media 9 .
Mulan ( 1998 ) only has musical numbers for the first half , until the characters find the destroyed village .
From there on songs were avoided because the tone was meant to be darker .
10 .
In Ant-Man ( 2015 ) actor Garrett Morris makes a brief appearance in a scene .
Morris was the first person to ever portray Ant-Man in a 1979 Saturday Night Live @ @ @ @ @ @ @ When Liam Neeson was asked to play the antagonist in A Million Ways to die in the West ( 2014 ) ( directed by Seth McFarlane ) he accepted due to a scene in Family Guy where Peter says “ Imagine Liam Neeson in a Western !
Ha !
With that funny accent of his !
”

Pics
The subreddit r/MovieDetails is an ever-growing collection of trivia about films, including hidden in-jokes or Easter eggs we may have missed and facts behind the creation of the films.
We trawled through it so you don’t have to and picked out some belters.
1. In the beginning of Joker (2019) there’s a familiar face in the mirror
Via
2. Men in Black (1997) – the language these aliens speak together is ‘Huttese’, the language Jabba the Hutt speaks in the Star Wars films.
Via
3. In Home Alone (1990) when they counted the people for the trip they say there’s 17 people in total. An odd number between two vans means they will be split 8/9. Since Kevin was missing both vans had 8 people instead, making each group assume they were on the 8-people van, not suspecting a thing
Via
4. In The Matrix (1999) the way Neo and Morpheus attack each other with the same move, their clothes and head/hair forms the Yin-Yang Symbol
Via
5. In Ratatouille (2007), the ratatouille that Rémy prepares was designed by Chef Thomas Keller. It’s a real recipe. It takes at least four hours to make.
Via
6. In Titanic, Jack tells Rose that he went ice fishing on Lake Wissota in Wisconsin, which was formed in 1917 by the creation of a hydroelectric dam on the Chippewa River, five years after the Titanic sank.
Via
7. In “Hercules” (1997) Hades says “Guys, relax. It’s only half-time” exactly at the 46-minute mark, the halfway point of the 92-minute movie
Via
8. In 6 Underground (2019) at 14:42 you can see Ryan Reynolds recording a video for his social media
Via
9. Mulan (1998) only has musical numbers for the first half, until the characters find the destroyed village. From there on songs were avoided because the tone was meant to be darker.
Via
10. In Ant-Man (2015) actor Garrett Morris makes a brief appearance in a scene. Morris was the first person to ever portray Ant-Man in a 1979 Saturday Night Live skit called Superhero Party.
Via
11. When Liam Neeson was asked to play the antagonist in A Million Ways to die in the West (2014) (directed by Seth McFarlane) he accepted due to a scene in Family Guy where Peter says “Imagine Liam Neeson in a Western! Ha! With that funny accent of his!”
Via


thepoke--2020-09-20--Somebody just won an Ig Nobel Prize for giving helium to an alligator

The Ig Nobel Prize ceremony was started in 1991 by the satirical science magazine , The Annals of Improbable Research , and has , each year , celebrated ten unusual achievements or areas of research .
Dr. Elena Bodnar , who won the 2009 Ig Nobel Prize for Public Health with a bra that would convert to two facemasks in an emergency .
Who ’ s laughing now , eh ?
Karina Acevedo-Whitehouse and Agnes Rocha-Gosselin , awarded the 2010 Ig Nobel Prize for Engineering for devising a way to collect whale snot using Petri dishes suspended from helicopters .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ was picked up by Kiyoshi Mabuchi , Kensei Tanaka , Daichi Uchijima and Rina Sakai who wrote a paper on the slippiness of a banana skin under a shoe .
The 2020 awards have been no less unusual .
The prize for Psychology reflected Miranda Giacomin and Nicholas Rule ’ s research into whether narcissists can be identified by their eyebrows ( they can ) , the Peace Prize went to the diplomats of India and Pakistan for ringing each other ’ s doorbells and running away – and then there was this… @ @ @ @ @ @ @ how alligators signal their body size through vocalising – and they did it by getting one of them to breathe helium , like an idiot at a teenager ’ s party .
And this is how that sounded .
We don ’ t speak alligator , but we suspect the higher-toned part of the recording was the creature saying You can ’ t convince us that isn ’ t light relief from the world right now .
The 7 deadly dangers of women in science , by Tim Hunt

Weird World
The Ig Nobel Prize ceremony was started in 1991 by the satirical science magazine, The Annals of Improbable Research, and has, each year, celebrated ten unusual achievements or areas of research.
Past winners have included:
Dr. Elena Bodnar, who won the 2009 Ig Nobel Prize for Public Health with a bra that would convert to two facemasks in an emergency. Who’s laughing now, eh?
Via Karina Acevedo-Whitehouse and Agnes Rocha-Gosselin, awarded the 2010 Ig Nobel Prize for Engineering for devising a way to collect whale snot using Petri dishes suspended from helicopters. The 2014 Ig Nobel Prize for Physics was picked up by Kiyoshi Mabuchi, Kensei Tanaka, Daichi Uchijima and Rina Sakai who wrote a paper on the slippiness of a banana skin under a shoe.
Image @shotsoflouis on Unsplash
The 2020 awards have been no less unusual.
The prize for Psychology reflected Miranda Giacomin and Nicholas Rule’s research into whether narcissists can be identified by their eyebrows (they can), the Peace Prize went to the diplomats of India and Pakistan for ringing each other’s doorbells and running away – and then there was this…
Researcher Stephan Reber and his co-workers discovered how alligators signal their body size through vocalising – and they did it by getting one of them to breathe helium, like an idiot at a teenager’s party.
Via
And this is how that sounded.
We don’t speak alligator, but we suspect the higher-toned part of the recording was the creature saying
“Listen to this, lads. I sound like Mickey Mouse.“
You can’t convince us that isn’t light relief from the world right now.
It has been rough lately, but never fear as now we have the #IgNobel Awards, where Scientists win award for giving an alligator helium and making it shouthttps://t.co/9GY3LGNYaH — Dr. Mark JS Miller (@docmmiller) September 19, 2020
READ MORE
The 7 deadly dangers of women in science, by Tim Hunt
Source BBC Image Matthew Essman on Unsplash


thepoke--2020-09-20--Boris Johnson thinks he’s “overburdened and underpaid” – 9 very unsympathetic reactions

If you feel you ’ ve been having a hard time because of the effect of the lockdown on the @ @ @ @ @ only pays minimum wage , spare a thought for the poor Prime Minister , as @ @ @ @ @ on a mere *checks notes* £150,000 .
The air was heavy with sarcasm .
There @ @ @ @ @ .
Here are some more things people had to say about # PoorBoris .

News
If you feel you’ve been having a hard time because of the effect of the lockdown on the economy or because your job only pays minimum wage, spare a thought for the poor Prime Minister, as he has to make do on a mere *checks notes* £150,000.
Overburdened, underpaid and ‘misery on his face’: Boris Johnson gets the blues https://t.co/hoS5txGGe7 — The Times (@thetimes) September 19, 2020
The air was heavy with sarcasm.
Boris and Carrie only have a single cleaner and are worried they won't be able to afford a nanny. I'm sure millions will sympathise. pic.twitter.com/aU4Flp8CW2 — Otto English (@Otto_English) September 19, 2020
I know some people think care workers and nurses have it tough, but the Prime Minister only has one cleaner, has to walk through an office to his rose garden, pay for his own dinner, AND support his many children from his paltry £150,000 salary. It's no life! pic.twitter.com/wSAAQDy3E5 — Owen Jones 🌹 (@OwenJones84) September 19, 2020
Not to mention fury.
I fucking despair at a country where a footballer is having to fight for kids to not go hungry and the media puts out a 'woe is me' article about our Eton idiot PM not being paid enough and having to pay for food with his £150k salary. https://t.co/2Cllg4MBsD — Christian Sinclair (@c_sinc_) September 19, 2020
There was also this helpful advice.
Hi @BorisJohnson I'm sorry to hear you are struggling on £150k. I get ESA, which for the over 25s is less than £4k per year. If you need any help with budgeting, do not hesitate to contact me or contact your local jobcentre, @CitizensAdvice or @StepChange for help. #PoorBoris — Queen Neferure ♿ 🇪🇺🐝🌹 (@Neferure1) September 19, 2020
Here are some more things people had to say about #PoorBoris.
1.
FUN GAME
Who is overburdened and underpaid? A man earning £150K a year with a fortune from incendiary columns and speaking engagements of £350K a year. A nurse facing the pandemic on £25K A care worker facing the pandemic on less than the living wage https://t.co/hs3Y9wtyZf — David Schneider (@davidschneider) September 19, 2020
2.
Not elite:
guy on a £150,000 salary whining about how he only has the one cleaner to clean his free accommodation and zero nannies Elite:
people who voted remain — James Felton (@JimMFelton) September 19, 2020
3.
Before care workers and nurses complain about their pay, they ought to try surviving on just £150k a year, without so much as a £2,750 an hour column in The Telegraph.
(plus book royalties, obvs.) pic.twitter.com/Xo0xVVJd3W — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) September 19, 2020
4.
5.


thepoke--2020-09-21--Downing Street denied Boris Johnson went to Perugia – 13 favourite responses

Downing Street has denied claims in the Italian media today that Boris Johnson made a secret trip to Perugia last @ @ @ @ @ been better occupied dealing with the coronavirus , say , or Brexit .
No 10 @ @ @ @ @ with Conservative MPs on Zoom on 11 September , and attended his son ’ s @ @ @ @ @ Anyway , that ’ s enough of that , here ’ s exactly what people @ @ @ @ @ Twitter .
The 12 best reactions to the Chris Whitty and Sir Patrick Vallance coronavirus @

News
Downing Street has denied claims in the Italian media today that Boris Johnson made a secret trip to Perugia last weekend when he might have been better occupied dealing with the coronavirus, say, or Brexit.
Intriguing. Perugia airport – close to Evgeny Lebedev’s luxury Italian hideaway – says that Boris Johnson was there last weekend.
Yet No 10 says that’s wrong…. 🤷🏻♀ https://t.co/eQfUUn6Stw — Pippa Crerar (@PippaCrerar) September 20, 2020
No 10 said Johnson held a meeting with Conservative MPs on Zoom on 11 September, and attended his son’s baptism the following day.
The solution to the mystery of where was the PM on weekend of 11 Sept is that on 12 Sept @BorisJohnson and @carriesymonds were baptising their son Wilfred in Westminster Cathedral. “You can confirm with the priest!” I was told. So he could not have been in Italy then. But how https://t.co/i1I8Kwkzvs — Robert Peston (@Peston) September 21, 2020
Anyway, that’s enough of that, here’s exactly what people made of it all on Twitter.
1.
“Did the Prime Minister travel to Perugia?” Shapps:
“Not as far as I’m aware” “So, he didn’t” Shapps:
“Not as far as I’m aware” Conclusion:
The Prime Minister was in Perugia. pic.twitter.com/vhsH03nQlb — David Schneider (@davidschneider) September 21, 2020
2.
No10 denies rumours Boris Johnson ducked the press conference in order to avoid questions about his Italian accent and a tan — James Felton (@JimMFelton) September 21, 2020
3.
BREAKING: first photographic evidence of Boris Johnson in Perugia pic.twitter.com/5r0JUJjEXU — dave ❄ 🥕 🧻 (@davemacladd) September 21, 2020
4.
Dominic Cummings drove to Barnards Castle to test his eyesight, but Boris Johnson just used a distant font. pic.twitter.com/GYS3WXCNOO — David QC (@DavidMuttering) September 21, 2020
5.
Boris Johnson refuses to accept that some people’s nearest Covid test centre is hundreds of miles away but the nearest available font to baptise his son is apparently in Perugia. — Nick Pettigrew (@Nick_Pettigrew) September 21, 2020
6.
Reports claiming that the Prime Minister went on a secret mini-break to Italy are categorically untrue. On a separate note, thank you @BorisJohnson. Sarah and I are loving the new fridge magnet! pic.twitter.com/teb6VTXNA5 — Michael Govern Ready (@mikegove12) September 21, 2020
7.
BREAKING: Boris Johnson joins government briefing via Zoom. pic.twitter.com/finLRMaGQU — Have I Got News For You (@haveigotnews) September 21, 2020
8.
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“Perugia? Why, sir, I never even met her”. pic.twitter.com/DePjTVqzrt — Stig Abell (@StigAbell) September 21, 2020
10.
https://twitter.com/youwouldknow/status/1307978945116151809?s=20
11.
WHERE BORIS JOHNSON SHOULDN’T HAVE BEEN:
Perugia WHERE BORIS JOHNSON SHOULD HAVE BEEN:
Stood with his chief scientists at a vital briefing at a critical point in a deadly pandemic. — David Schneider (@davidschneider) September 21, 2020
12.
https://twitter.com/SpillerOfTea/status/1307965108044300290?s=20
13.
One more story of Johnson disappearing mysteriously and we’re going to have to tag him like a cat — James Felton (@JimMFelton) September 21, 2020
READ MORE
The 12 best reactions to the Chris Whitty and Sir Patrick Vallance coronavirus briefing
Images Pixabay screengrab


thepoke--2020-09-21--Funniest wrong answer we’ve seen this week

Here ’ s a wrong answer that made us smile .
‘ I almost got it , ’ said midget_the_negan @ @ @ @ @ .
‘ How the hell do you even type that shit in a computer.
’ @ @ @ @ @ have to do is say “ But the answer is 17 ” and some angry @ @ @ @ @ comment with the correct answer and then i ’ ll know the answer.
’ MekiMeks @ @ @ @ @ , since inside the sum 2 unknown variables t and x are referenced .
The @ @ @ @ @ a 3-dimensional curve.
’ JorianPruim What they said .
And it reminded us – Google @ @ @ @ @ ‘ best maths exam answer ever ’ from a while back .

Here’s a wrong answer that made us smile. ‘I almost got it,’ said midget_the_negan who shared it on Reddit.
So close!
‘How the hell do you even type that shit in a computer.’ SuperFireBoy200
‘Now all I have to do is say “But the answer is 17” and some angry know it all will condescendingly comment with the correct answer and then i’ll know the answer.’ MekiMeks
‘That’s unlikely, since inside the sum 2 unknown variables t and x are referenced. The best you can get is a 3-dimensional curve.’ JorianPruim


thepoke--2020-09-21--This takedown was so brutal you’ll be cringing long after you’ve stopped looking at it

Takedown of the week is simply brutal , as shared by Redditor elch3w who said : ‘ F in the @ @ @ @ @ ’ ‘ The fact that she didn ’ t even hesitate… I felt that the @ @ @ @ @ didn ’ t even use the right you ’ re.
’ Amko99mp ‘ And he @ @ @ @ @ a comma , he can do better… after he puts his heart back together.
’ @ @ @ @ @ it ’ s 4.30 in the morning.
’ letsnotbedumb ‘ Our boy will bounce back @ @ @ @ @ ever.
’ elch3w

Takedown of the week is simply brutal, as shared by Redditor elch3w who said: ‘F in the chat for our fallen comrade.’
They’re not kidding.
OOF.
‘The fact that she didn’t even hesitate… I felt that the hardest.’ Tobmau
‘She didn’t even use the right you’re.’ Amko99mp
‘And he typed with an apostrophe and a comma, he can do better… after he puts his heart back together.’ clumsycatcackler
‘I like how it’s 4.30 in the morning.’ letsnotbedumb
‘Our boy will bounce back, stronger and better than ever.’ elch3w


thepoke--2020-09-21--The next level detail on this wedding cake is simply adorable (and brilliant)

From a distance , it looks just like any other wedding cake .
But take a closer look and the @ @ @ @ @ level stuff .
And very cute .
And everyone loved it after it was shared @ @ @ @ @ ‘ I love how such a small thing can add so much flair and personality @ @ @ @ @ ‘ My sister ’ s cake had tiny dinosaurs nomming it .
We have an @ @ @ @ @ I love that they put frosting around the dog ’ s mouth too !
’ @ @ @ @ @ decorator I can assure you that we have as much fun with these types of @ @ @ @ @ !
I ’ m sure sound effects were involved.
’ masterbakeralot ‘ That dog is @ @ @ @ @ on a tiny little bit of that cake… .
my black lab would have eaten @ @ @ @ @ ’ gildafossati

From a distance, it looks just like any other wedding cake. But take a closer look and the level of detail is next level stuff. And very cute.
Just a little bit closer …
And everyone loved it after it was shared on Reddit by Grillos.
‘I love how such a small thing can add so much flair and personality to a cake.’ iBird
‘My sister’s cake had tiny dinosaurs nomming it. We have an awesome family.’ spookyttws
‘That’s f-cking adorable.’ UnsettlingAura
‘I love that they put frosting around the dog’s mouth too!’ busiqq
‘As a cake decorator I can assure you that we have as much fun with these types of things as you would think! I’m sure sound effects were involved.’ masterbakeralot
‘That dog is sooo well beheaved, munching on a tiny little bit of that cake…. my black lab would have eaten half of the cake already.’ gildafossati


thepoke--2020-09-21--Simply 13 Sunday Sport headlines to take the edge off just a little bit

Just 13 Sunday Sport headlines that are so ridiculous that they might help to take the edge off just a @ @ @ @ @ with this one , shared by @ JimMFelton on Twitter , from the Sunday just @ @ @ @ @ also this one … … which had a particularly interesting postscript .

Pics
Just 13 Sunday Sport headlines that are so ridiculous that they might help to take the edge off just a little bit.
We begin with this one, shared by @JimMFelton on Twitter, from the Sunday just gone …
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
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And there was also this one …
… which had a particularly interesting postscript.
Top notch journalism from @thesundaysport here. Except this is an old photo of my Nanny & Grandad (taken in California), with fake names, a fake story and photoshopped faces. Nan is delighted she passes for 69 though. https://t.co/QfUoIfWAtT — Sammy Lazarus (@iamsammylazarus) February 29, 2020
READ MORE
44 brilliantly amusing readers’ letters to Viz
Source @JimMFelton https://www.facebook.com/sundaysport/


thepoke--2020-09-21--The 12 best reactions to the Chris Whitty and Sir Patrick Vallance coronavirus briefing

In a break from convention , the Chief Medical Officer and the Chief Scientific Adviser to the Government , Chris @ @ @ @ @ have delivered a briefing on the coronavirus – without a politician present and with no @ @ @ @ @ message was stark and implored the country to act as one to protect as many @ @ @ @ @ virus .
People weren ’ t happy that the press couldn ’ t ask for @ @ @ @ @ the Prime Minister nor the Health Secretary were taking part .
These other comments reflected @ @ @ @ @ , at least – rather well .

News
In a break from convention, the Chief Medical Officer and the Chief Scientific Adviser to the Government, Chris Whitty and Patrick Vallance, have delivered a briefing on the coronavirus – without a politician present and with no opportunity for questions.
Their message was stark and implored the country to act as one to protect as many people as possible from the virus.
Chris Whitty breaks it down for the ‘I’ll Take My Own Chances & I’ll Be Fine’ crew pic.twitter.com/tQPx3Szw5h — Toby Earle (@TobyonTV) September 21, 2020
People weren’t happy that the press couldn’t ask for any clarifications and that neither the Prime Minister nor the Health Secretary were taking part.
Utterly bizarre – and wrong on every level – that Whitty and Vallance aren't taking questions. What is the point of having having them speak if it's not to clarify and aid understanding.
They might as well just send out a press notice. — Stephen Pollard (@stephenpollard) September 21, 2020
Chris Whitty and Patrick Vallance doing the press conference. pic.twitter.com/w3MhOpPNhU — Jonny Sharples (@JonnyGabriel) September 21, 2020
Really great look not bothering to send out a politician for that. — Marina Hyde (@MarinaHyde) September 21, 2020
These other comments reflected the reaction – on Twitter, at least – rather well.
1.
Many thanks to Chris Whitty and Patrick Valance for doing my job for me. — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) September 21, 2020
2.
Meanwhile, at the Covid Press Conference pic.twitter.com/amLTAVMkOd — The Brexit Comic (@TheBrexitComic) September 21, 2020
3.
1976: Electric Slide 1994: Slide Away 2020: Next Slide Please — Nish Kumar (@MrNishKumar) September 21, 2020
4.
that whitty and vallance presser in full: pic.twitter.com/0i2Ma9sdSI — Chris Boyd 🇬🇧🇵🇭 (@paperghost) September 21, 2020
5.
Chris Whitty and Patrick Valance confirming that the only places exempt from any future lockdowns are Barnard Castle and Perugia — dave ❄ 🥕 🧻 (@davemacladd) September 21, 2020
6.


thepoke--2020-09-21--This thread of ‘David Attenborough as insects’ is a wonder of the natural world

We ’ re grateful to the marvellous @ pandamoanimum for this thread of ‘ David Attenborough as insects ’ which @ @ @ @ @ the outside world we needed today .

Pics
We’re grateful to the marvellous @pandamoanimum for this thread of ‘David Attenborough as insects’ which is just the escape from the outside world we needed today.
Go!
1.
Sir David Attenborough as insects. A thread. pic.twitter.com/gugdQNL3nn — Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) September 18, 2020
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thepoke--2020-09-21--The ‘Red Army Choir singing Tom Jones’ Sex Bomb’ doesn’t disappoint

Over on Twitter @ ogiovetti went viral with this video of the Red Army Choir singing Tom Jones ’ Sex @ @ @ @ @ not entirely sure of the context but that doesn ’ t matter right now .
@ @ @ @ @ there was one moment that everyone enjoyed best .
Of course they did .
This @ @ @ @ @ dementia sufferer ’ s amazing piano skills went viral because , well , have a @ @ @

Videos
Over on Twitter @ogiovetti went viral with this video of the Red Army Choir singing Tom Jones’ Sex Bomb.
We’re not entirely sure of the context but that doesn’t matter right now. Just watch it.
I don't know who needs to hear this, but here's the Red Army Choir singing 'Sex Bomb.' pic.twitter.com/LIVoRc2fHT — Olivia Giovetti (@ogiovetti) September 20, 2020
And there was one moment that everyone enjoyed best. Of course they did.
This version of Sex Bomb really takes off 1:23 into the video. The dad dancing is of the scale. — shane dillon (@shane_dillon) September 20, 2020
olivia i literally yelled “AAAAHHHH” when that guy started dancing — Kyra Davies (@kyramdavies) September 20, 2020
And an addendum.
Not Red Army but Internal Police Choir. Even more delicious. — Dimitri Lotovski (@DimitriCBS46) September 20, 2020
I know. I realized the mistake after I posted. And, all things considered, the misinformation felt pretty apt. — Olivia Giovetti (@ogiovetti) September 21, 2020
READ MORE
This clip of an 80 y/o dementia sufferer’s amazing piano skills went viral because, well, have a watch for yourself
Source Twitter @ogiovetti


thepoke--2020-09-21--This clip of an 80 y/o dementia sufferer’s amazing piano skills went viral because, well, have a wat

This clip of an 80 y/o dementia sufferer’s amazing piano skills went viral because, well, have a watch for yourself

You might know the very funny and all-round brilliant composer and East Sussex giraffe spotter @ mrnickharvey from Twitter .
@ @ @ @ @ his dad Paul , who was with Nick on ITV ’ s Good Morning Britain @ @ @ @ @ years old and has dementia but his ability to play and improvise on the piano @ @ @ @ @ clip went viral because it ’ s just an amazing , wonderful watch .
And @ @ @ @ @ previously shared by @ mrnickharvey .

Videos
You might know the very funny and all-round brilliant composer and East Sussex giraffe spotter @mrnickharvey from Twitter.
But you might not know his dad Paul, who was with Nick on ITV’s Good Morning Britain today.
Paul is 80 years old and has dementia but his ability to play and improvise on the piano is undiminished. And this clip went viral because it’s just an amazing, wonderful watch.
80-year-old dementia sufferer Paul Harvey became a viral sensation for his amazing piano skills. Paul shows just how brilliant his piano improvisation is live with @Piersmorgan and @susannareid100. The result is inspiring… pic.twitter.com/2MYpzsDhS4 — Good Morning Britain (@GMB) September 21, 2020
Beautiful.
Outstanding. May this gift stay with him for as long as possible — Mickey Mc (@TK_Trooper75) September 21, 2020
Beautiful. Brought tears to my eyes. How amazing is the power of music? — Ruthipegs (@Ruthless1984) September 21, 2020
This was absolutely amazing, he should make an album in conjunction with @DementiaUK because he has a real talent. Beautiful man, beautiful music and a really special soul xx — (@charlotteukcity) September 21, 2020
I’m no softie but, bloody hell, that was fantastic. The pride of his son, he couldn’t hide it if he tried. Beautiful. — Anthony #BlackLivesMatter (@fieldsi79) September 21, 2020
And here are some more clips previously shared by @mrnickharvey.
Dad’s ability to improvise and compose beautiful melodies on the fly has always amazed me. Tonight, I gave him four random notes as a starting point. Although his dementia is getting worse, moments like this bring him back to me. pic.twitter.com/dBInVCTmfF — Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) September 17, 2020
Dad has dementia. Sometimes he drifts into another world and I feel like I’m losing him. He is never more present, however, than when he plays the piano. He came to mine today and I asked him to play one of his compositions. He thought he wouldn’t be able to remember it. pic.twitter.com/EQGcXBwB3w — Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) June 23, 2019
To conclude …
Follow @mrnickharvey on Twitter here.
READ MORE
21+ times Nick Harvey hilariously ruined his young son’s jokes with facts
Source Twitter @GMB


thepoke--2020-09-21--This video revealing what varying degrees of short-sighted people see is a real eye-opener

We ’ re grateful to ophthalmologist and comedian @ DGlaucomflecken for sharing this video on Twitter , an insight into @ @ @ @ @ He originally posted it on TikTok and it went viral because , well , have @ @ @ @ @ And here are our favourite things people said about it ( including the good doctor @ @ @ @ @ of what people see with ( and without ) astigmatism is a real eye-opener

Videos
We’re grateful to ophthalmologist and comedian @DGlaucomflecken for sharing this video on Twitter, an insight into varying levels of short-sightedness.
He originally posted it on TikTok and it went viral because, well, have a watch for yourself.
Shout out to all the myopes pic.twitter.com/6Q5WN7s5Bg — Dr. Glaucomflecken (@DGlaucomflecken) September 19, 2020
And here are our favourite things people said about it (including the good doctor himself).
Please show this video to all your 20/20 friends. They need to know how lucky they are and why they should be nice to you at all times — Dr. Glaucomflecken (@DGlaucomflecken) September 19, 2020
-6.00 looks familiar.
I remember getting my first pair of glasses at age twelve and marvelling at the individual leaves on the trees. — elisa hurb (@elisa_hurb) September 19, 2020
Yes! -6 myself, I can vouch for the accuracy of this. Was 6 years old when I first got glasses, I’ve never forgotten the wonder of the world suddenly coming into focus! Till then no one believed me when I said I couldn’t see the blackboard, the teachers thought I was being lazy. — Rema Jyothirmayi (@RemaJyothirmayi) September 19, 2020
Mine are both around a -7, I forget exactly, but I literally can't see my glasses when I drop them, it's GARBAGE. pic.twitter.com/jKca5Ezgnb — Crowing For Days (@LilRedRooster) September 19, 2020
What you gotta do is grab your phone and open the camera. Then, hold the phone close enough to see through, and use it to look for your glasses 👍🏻👍🏻 That -7 life! — Ali Mientus (@AliMientus) September 19, 2020
Holy moly, I just tried it – that's a great hack, thanks! — Kristin 🤦♀ Parendo (@KrisParendo) September 19, 2020
READ MORE
This comparison of what people see with (and without) astigmatism is a real eye-opener
Source Twitter @DGlaucomflecken


thepoke--2020-09-21--15 cringeworthy but genuine notes sent home from school

Parents have been sharing the letters sent home from school when their little darlings strayed from the path .
The @ @ @ @ @ Panda pulled some together and we ’ ve picked our favourites .
3 .
Just @ @ @ @ @ .
Get the rubber gloves on

Pics
Parents have been sharing the letters sent home from school when their little darlings strayed from the path.
The good people over at Bored Panda pulled some together and we’ve picked our favourites.
1. That Maths itch
2. Is Futurama PG?
3. Just too pretty to work
4. That’s snot funny
5. Everybody wants a pocket worm
6. Get the rubber gloves on
7. And I cannot lie
8. Well, it’s a compound word


thepoke--2020-09-21--The new lockdown rules hilariously explained by Boris Johnson (parody)

Darren Dutton , who entertained us so well during lockdown by putting TV credits onto the coronavirus briefings , has @ @ @ @ @ new lockdown rules – sort of .
If the Prime Minister said it , it @ @ @ @ @ ’ t forget – if you smell meat , you must take a pregnancy test @ @ @ @ @ the many reactions to Darren ’ s excellent handiwork .
As a treat , this @ @ @ @ @ – or didn ’ t – with technical difficulties during one of the daily briefings @ @ @ @ @ the Golden Girls seem hilariously apt for the daily briefing

Videos
Darren Dutton, who entertained us so well during lockdown by putting TV credits onto the coronavirus briefings, has stepped in to clarify the new lockdown rules – sort of.
New lockdown rules from tomorrow pic.twitter.com/oi7jJJSdWm — Darren Dutton (@Darren_Dutton) September 20, 2020
If the Prime Minister said it, it must be true.
from Laughing GIFs via Gfycat
Don’t forget – if you smell meat, you must take a pregnancy test.
Here are some of the many reactions to Darren’s excellent handiwork.
I don't know whether it's me going mad now, but this made me laugh out loud. https://t.co/DnIZWl7Ivx — Annette Dittert (@annettedittert) September 20, 2020
As a treat, this is how Boris Johnson coped – or didn’t – with technical difficulties during one of the daily briefings.
Some technical difficulties at the daily briefing pic.twitter.com/MdPKX2V9DD — Darren Dutton (@Darren_Dutton) July 8, 2020
READ MORE
The end credits of the Golden Girls seem hilariously apt for the daily briefing
Source Darren Dutton Image Darren Dutton


thepoke--2020-09-21--“Skepta explains THAT Priti Patel tweet with a remix…‘That’s Priti’” (Parody)

Last week , rapper Skepta tweeted a picture of Priti Patel with no explanation .
There was a widespread assumption @ @ @ @ @ of the Home Secretary ’ s attractiveness .
Now , the incredibly talented Munya Chawawa @ @ @ @ @ ’ s ‘ That ’ s Not Me ’ into a perfect takedown of Priti @ @ @ @ @ the tweet .
“ I used to think she was cute but she tried to @ @ @ @ @ family.
“ The rate Munya puts out these absolute bangers has left some people in @ @ @ @ @ watch Skepta ’ s original here..

Videos
Last week, rapper Skepta tweeted a picture of Priti Patel with no explanation.
There was a widespread assumption that he was expressing approval of the Home Secretary’s attractiveness.
She's actually thicc 😫 I resent the fact that Priti Patel is the hottest MP and yet so evil can Labour elect some some peng tings pls https://t.co/pwNBWzNbjI — 凯丽 🍎🍯 (@LeftJewasian) September 17, 2020
POLITICS OVER PUNANI. CONSCIOUSNESS OVER COOCHIE!!! https://t.co/fZFdAL8E6A — Official Potato Stan Account (@LazarusKumi) September 17, 2020
Now, the incredibly talented Munya Chawawa‘s has turned Skepta’s ‘That’s Not Me’ into a perfect takedown of Priti Patel and an explanation of the tweet.
Skepta explains THAT Priti Patel tweet with a remix…‘That’s Priti’ 👀 pic.twitter.com/FehEw4CCCh — Munya Chawawa (@munyachawawa) September 20, 2020
“I used to think she was cute but she tried to deport man’s whole family.“
People were rightly blown away.
This guy is criminally talented https://t.co/teUNB9ODNC — champagneakhii🇾🇪🇸🇩 (@_akhi_younes) September 20, 2020
On. The. Pulse. Amazed at how quickly you come up with this stuff. — r e n o i r (@BignessAsUsual) September 20, 2020
The rate Munya puts out these absolute bangers has left some people in a spin.
Munya Pls. I haven’t even recovered from is 6 enough. https://t.co/VgIsdOu95Z — bolanle of lagos (@ImaniDH) September 20, 2020
We agree.
You can watch Skepta’s original here..
READ MORE
Munya Chawawa hilariously takes down heatwave-related everyday racism
Source Munya Chawawa Image Munya Chawawa


thepoke--2020-09-21--15 very good reasons why people don’t want to try this clifftop stunt

Originally posted by Kody Workman and Kelly Castille of Positravelty with the message “ We urge you to take a @ @ @ @ @ barriers of negativity and oppression of self fulfillment and paint the picture of who YOU @ @ @ @ @ it certainly doesn ’ t look like most people ’ s cup of tea .

Twitter
Tweeter Baba Rumdev had a question for Twitter.
What's stopping you from doing this with your partner pic.twitter.com/9hDw31Jutp — Baba Rumdev 🥃 (@HeeraTarantino) September 15, 2020
Originally posted by Kody Workman and Kelly Castille of Positravelty with the message “We urge you to take a chance, to push past barriers of negativity and oppression of self fulfillment and paint the picture of who YOU want to be.“, it certainly doesn’t look like most people’s cup of tea.
The responses confirmed that.
1.
Very specific language in our life insurance policy. https://t.co/2vBAakCi0R — Duncan Jones (@ManMadeMoon) September 20, 2020
2.
3.
Allergic to stone 😢 — chris o'dowd (@BigBoyler) September 21, 2020
4.
The episode of Eastenders where Barry died https://t.co/XxfOUcoK95 — shane reaction ☘ (@shane_reaction_) September 20, 2020
5.
Not wanting to be single and charged with manslaughter for starters https://t.co/1CwRAiHUzf — 🇭🇰RoonKolos🏳🌈 | Toon Rolex (@RoonKolos) September 19, 2020
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thepoke--2020-09-21--Trump says the US will send a man to “Nars” and the reactions are out of this world – 8 favourites

During a campaign rally in North Carolina , Donald Trump seemed to struggle with his words , including making this @ @ @ @ @ land the first women on the moon and the United States will be the first @ @ @ @ @ on Nars …or Mars.
“ Of course , the reactions were out of this world @ @ @ @ @ an explanation .
He just wants to return to his home planet .
Donald Trump @ @ @ @ @ will make Covid-19 go away – 7 deadly takedowns Source Acyn Torabi Image Acyn Torabi @ @ @ @ @

Twitter
During a campaign rally in North Carolina, Donald Trump seemed to struggle with his words, including making this prediction:
The President says the US will be the first country to put an astronaut on “Nars” pic.twitter.com/hWhVAsVKjU — Acyn Torabi (@Acyn) September 20, 2020
“We will land the first women on the moon and the United States will be the first nation to land an astronaut on Nars …or Mars.“
Of course, the reactions were out of this world.
1.
2.
From Nars to Penus and beyond! https://t.co/yXqEE0DwTF — 🏳🌈David Kent 🏡🏳🌈 (@BayAreaWolf_) September 20, 2020
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Looking forward to Dinesh D’Souza’s explanation of how the Romans actually pronounced it “Nars.” https://t.co/Q9BR1aVbz3 — Arjun Jaikumar (@ArjunJaikumar) September 20, 2020
6.
“Nars” is Trump’s favorite Swedish porn star. https://t.co/GkLK0xgVBn — Tea Pain (@TeaPainUSA) September 20, 2020
7.
Rite out there with Nercury. https://t.co/KDuCRuxo9N — Dennis Herring (@dcherring) September 20, 2020
8.
So apparently Trump first discovered the name of one of the two planets closest to Earth on a teleprompter, many weeks after issuing an order to send humans there It's one small word for Trump—who's one giant mistake for mankind https://t.co/czvH3Vq7hb — Seth Abramson (@SethAbramson) September 20, 2020
One Twitter user had an explanation.
Actual picture of a Nars-issist pic.twitter.com/cMvI0G1c00 — Sue Me (@IAmHighOnHeels) September 20, 2020
He just wants to return to his home planet.
READ MORE
Donald Trump said ‘herd mentality’ will make Covid-19 go away – 7 deadly takedowns
Source Acyn Torabi Image Acyn Torabi, Adam Miller on Unsplash


thepoke--2020-09-21--The Rule of Six might be lifted for Christmas Day – 11 festive footnotes

In an effort not to be seen as Scrooge , Boris Johnson is allegedly considering lifting the Rule of Six @ @ @ @ @ that coronavirus rules laid waste to two Eids , Diwali and now Rosh Hashanah for @ @ @ @ @ Jewish communities , it seems not just scientifically questionable but also unfair .
Of course @ @ @ @ @ NHS ’ message would be lost in the celebrations .
Luckily for us , the @ @ @ @ @ designed the perfect card for the occasion .
The 12 funniest responses to the news @ @ @ @ @ enforcing the new rules

News
In an effort not to be seen as Scrooge, Boris Johnson is allegedly considering lifting the Rule of Six for Christmas Day.
Given that coronavirus rules laid waste to two Eids, Diwali and now Rosh Hashanah for the Muslim, Hindu and Jewish communities, it seems not just scientifically questionable but also unfair.
That pesky Coronavirus! Magically disappearing on Christmas Day, but not Eid https://t.co/N7gmZ2s3YG — Mozes Salvatore (@mozessalvatore) September 20, 2020
Of course, that ‘Protect the NHS’ message would be lost in the celebrations.
Lifting the rule of 6 for Christmas day is not only effin stupid and undermining of all messaging but it is a slap in the face to clinicians that work Christmas and then face a massive spike in the new year.@BorisJohnson is proving dimmer by the day https://t.co/BZhNykInn4 — Will Black (@WillBlackWriter) September 20, 2020
Twitter had some thoughts.
1.
Don’t want to spoil surprise but this year Santa got everybody a potentially fatal respiratory disease https://t.co/lQ66qCVHvF — James Felton (@JimMFelton) September 20, 2020
2.
I thought it best to remove the limit on how many people you can see, because I want to spend Christmas Day with my children and I'm not sure how many to expect. pic.twitter.com/Z6YBElcnV9 — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) September 20, 2020
3.
on the sixth day of christmas my true love gave to me yer da coughing under the tree https://t.co/BLG6pQejEZ — Chris Boyd 🇬🇧🇵🇭 (@paperghost) September 20, 2020
4.
Famously, pandemics simply put down their virus guns and want a friendly game of football on Christmas Day. https://t.co/1dicDZ3l6x — Will Jennings (@willjennings80) September 20, 2020
5.
This Christmas, join us for a special edition of Noel's COVID Party. https://t.co/iGX167lxZN pic.twitter.com/GRjehZ7wBy — Russty Russ – #Retro (@russty_russ) September 20, 2020
6.
7.
Oh my god he thinks he's a prime minister in a heartwarming Christmas film and not an actual world leader fucking hellll. https://t.co/9JUXSbNueo — Fern Brady (@FernBrady) September 20, 2020
8.
Remember when we all got together and killed nan? — John Rain (@MrKenShabby) September 20, 2020
9.
We can sing “Last Christmas” and actually mean it literally https://t.co/2IMOuSAYJE — Janey Godley (@JaneyGodley) September 20, 2020
10.
idea.
change the calendars.
make every day "25th of December".
Leave doctored diaries near noted virus hotspots.
Soon, the virus, now sentient and with a grasp of the written word, will see every day as Xmas. From inherent common sense and decency, it will go. Mark my words. — Danny Wallace (@dannywallace) September 20, 2020
11.
Coronavirus waking up on Christmas Day pic.twitter.com/JH9BDASKIn — nigella lawson's asbestos hands (@floellaumbagabe) September 20, 2020
Luckily for us, the very funny @Pandamoanimum has designed the perfect card for the occasion.
As Boris Johnson is considering lifting the rule of six for 24 hours on Christmas Day, thought I’d design an appropriate Christmas card for the occasion. pic.twitter.com/jIpInKJSfG — Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) September 20, 2020
READ MORE
The 12 funniest responses to the news that covid marshals will be enforcing the new rules
Source Mirror Image Andrew Neel and Philip Goldsberry on Unsplash


thepoke--2020-09-22--Pubs will shut at 10pm to help battle the coronavirus – 7 responses worth raising a glass to

As part of Boris Johnson ’ s strategy to tackle a second wave of the coronavirus , the prime minister @ @ @ @ @ restaurants and the like would have to shut at 10pm .
And pretty much the @ @ @ @ @ question .
While you ’ re thinking of an answer to that , or maybe @ @ @ @ @ come up with one , her are our favourite responses The government is telling everyone @ @ @ @ @ – only 7 responses you need

News
As part of Boris Johnson’s strategy to tackle a second wave of the coronavirus, the prime minister announced today that pubs, restaurants and the like would have to shut at 10pm.
JUST IN: U.K. PM Boris Johnson says pubs and restaurants in England must close at 10pm from Thursday in a bid to curb Covid-19 spread pic.twitter.com/OTT0GjxZhV — Bloomberg QuickTake (@QuickTake) September 22, 2020
Pretty much the entire internet asked the same question.
What difference does closing the pubs at 10pm make? Asking for a friend … — Andrew Neil (@afneil) September 21, 2020
And while you’re thinking of an answer to that, or maybe waiting for the government to come up with one, here are our favourite responses
1.
Coronavirus at 9.59pm
vs
Coronavirus at 10.01pm pic.twitter.com/TJzLuahTjP — Dara Ó Briain (@daraobriain) September 22, 2020
2.
10pm pub closing not good enough. People will just go on to house parties. Need a mandatory 10:45pm National Crisis Bedtime. Teeth done by 10:40, light off 10:44. No you can't have a glass of water you should have thought of that before. — Simon Blackwell (@simonblackwell) September 21, 2020
3.
Covid turning up at the pub to find it shut at 10 pic.twitter.com/LsMubH7Msx — HappyToast ★ (@IamHappyToast) September 22, 2020
4.
Tbh if this means that New Years Eve finishes at 10pm I’m all for it. — Scott Bryan (@scottygb) September 21, 2020
5.
step away from the gin and tonic pic.twitter.com/iSm9bEY0V4 — Jim Pickard (@PickardJE) September 22, 2020
6.
I can’t think of a more British response to a devastating global pandemic than knocking a mere 60 minutes off pub opening hours, and then hoping for the best. — Matt Rudge (@Mattrudge) September 21, 2020
7.
Only six friends, table service & finished by 10pm.
That’s not fighting a pandemic.
Those are criteria for a middle-aged night out. — Geoff Norcott (@GeoffNorcott) September 22, 2020
To conclude …
After locking down way too late last time and causing a lot of unnecessary deaths I'd assumed the government might have gone for something a little more stringent than "get the shots in at 9" — James Felton (@JimMFelton) September 21, 2020
READ MORE
The government is telling everyone to work from home again – only 7 responses you need
Images Pixabay screengrab


thepoke--2020-09-22--This Matt Lucas takedown of Boris Johnson has gone viral all over again because it’s even more relev

This Matt Lucas takedown of Boris Johnson has gone viral all over again because it’s even more relevant now

As you ’ ll have seen by now Boris Johnson has issued strict new Covid guidelines that he says could @ @ @ @ @ .
They include telling people to work from home ( after telling them not to @ @ @ @ @ closing pubs and restaurants and the like at 10pm ( because that ’ s when @ @ @ @ @ It sent this Matt Lucas video viral all over again because it ’ s even @ @ @ @ @ was when he made it in May .
And you can follow @ RealMattLucas on @ @ @ @ @ is telling everyone to work from home again – only 7 responses you need

Videos
As you’ll have seen by now Boris Johnson has issued strict new Covid guidelines that he says could last up to six months.
They include telling people to work from home (after telling them not to work from home) and closing pubs and restaurants and the like at 10pm (because that’s when Covid goes home).
It sent this Matt Lucas video viral all over again because it’s even more relevant now than it was when he made it in May.
Some kind of soothsayer.
Although the government's advice has U-turned and flip flopped, Matt Lucas' advice from way back in May is still correct. https://t.co/OHH0orJp98 — Rob Carver (@investingidiocy) September 22, 2020
Work from home if you can but also lose your job if you don’t go back to the office. Seems perfectly clear to me. — James O'Brien (@mrjamesob) September 22, 2020
"Stay at home"
*Stays at home*
"What the fuck are you doing"
"I-"
"GET BACK TO WORK"
"But-"
"BUY A FUCKING SANDWICH"
*Goes back to work*
"Oh you've really gone and done it now, you assholes, you morons-" — James Felton (@JimMFelton) September 22, 2020
And you can follow @RealMattLucas on Twitter here!
READ MORE
The government is telling everyone to work from home again – only 7 responses you need
Source @RealMattLucas


thepoke--2020-09-22--Our 13 favourite funny takes on the latest coronavirus news

There ’ s a lot going on – rules changing every other day , changing back just when you least @ @ @ @ @ UK seems to be sliding back into lockdown one law at a time .
Needless @ @ @ @ @ s thoughts have been on the pandemic and how it ’ s being handled – @ @ @ @ @ as the powerful .
These are the best takes we ’ ve seen today .
@ @ @ @ @ Ross Danielsman has shared this relatable post about having to videocall our loved ones .
@ @ @ @ @ on what ’ s going on with the coronavirus

Twitter
There’s a lot going on – rules changing every other day, changing back just when you least expect it – and the UK seems to be sliding back into lockdown one law at a time.
Needless to say, people’s thoughts have been on the pandemic and how it’s being handled – by the public as well as the powerful.
These are the best takes we’ve seen today.
1.
I remember when I was like “I can’t believe we’ve been in quarantine for THREE WHOLE WEEKS!” That was 7 years ago. — Kumail Nanjiani (@kumailn) September 20, 2020
2.
Denise Welch, Kirstie Allsopp and Ian Brown walk into a bar… …They are immediately asked to leave for refusing to follow basic safety rules 🥁 — Liam Thorp (@LiamThorpECHO) September 20, 2020
3.
Pretty sure we could test the entire UK in 24hrs if we let Aldi checkout assistants run the testing centres — Helen Ingram (@drhingram) September 18, 2020
4.
August: "Go to the pubs! In fact, we'll subsidise your visits!"
September: "We might have to close pubs because they're Covid pits." — David Whitley (@mrdavidwhitley) September 18, 2020
5.
no officer, this isn't an illegal rave, we've just got a DJ for our fox hunt — r (@rreeces) September 15, 2020
6.
Strange times we’re living in where you can go into Walmart and not see a person’s mouth but still see their buttcrack. — mark (@TheCatWhisprer) September 19, 2020
7.
Lockdown 2: I still know what you did this summer. Lockdown 2: Lock Harder Lockdown 2: 2Lock 2Down Lockdown 2: Lockdown In Da Hood Lockdown 2: Live Free or Lockdown Lockdown 2: Lockdown Ever After Lockdown 2: 28 Weeks Later Lockdown 2: The Second Best Exotic Lockdown — Bethany Black (@BeffernieBlack) September 22, 2020
8.
I've a terrible feeling the John Lewis Christmas advert is going to be a simple montage of discarded face masks in empty streets, with Lily Allen doing a ukulele version of 'The Four Horsemen' by Aphrodite's Child. — Benjamin Myers (@BenMyers1) September 18, 2020
9.
I'm sorry, but we will have to cancel just me and you meeting in my garden for a socially distanced cuppa. However, I can meet you in a crowded pub instead. Safety first, etc…https://t.co/0Fu7cUbot2 — The Original Twitflup! (@TheRealFlups) September 18, 2020
10.
11.
The anti-mask, anti-lockdown, antivaxx conspiracy theory fans protesting in Trafalgar Square know what’s really going on, and they have good bullshit detectors. They do now, anyway, because I’ve sold a few hundred there today. — paul bassett davies (@thewritertype) September 19, 2020
12.
Oh, I thought we were told to go to the pub and eat out to help out? Silly old public, eh? https://t.co/XMSHw4ClQI — kath 🙀😷❄🇪🇺✊🏾 (@KathyBurke) September 20, 2020
13.
can’t believe the news about everyone that has been in John Lennon airport this week having to self isolate 😧😧 imagine all the people — caitlyn 🍒 (@caitlynburns07) September 17, 2020
Over on TikTok, comedian Ross Danielsman has shared this relatable post about having to videocall our loved ones.
READ MORE
14 of the funniest comments on what’s going on with the coronavirus
Image Jason Wolf


thepoke--2020-09-22--The government is telling everyone to work from home again – only 7 responses you need

With coronavirus cases on the rise , the government is again telling everyone to work from home if they possibly @ @ @ @ @ only a little while ago , of course , that the government was enthusiastically encouraging @ @ @ @ @ the workplace with front pages like this .
Gove said the latest guidance was a @ @ @ @ @ but it wasn ’ t that , of course , it was a massive reverse @ @ @ @ @ only 7 responses you need .

News
With coronavirus cases on the rise, the government is again telling everyone to work from home if they possibly can.
Here’s Michael Gove on BBC Breakfast today.
On #BBCBreakfast Michael Gove MP reveals a change in messaging about working from home.
“If people can work from home then they should”.https://t.co/AihXje23dH pic.twitter.com/3iBQf4lFFO — BBC Breakfast (@BBCBreakfast) September 22, 2020
It’s only a little while ago, of course, that the government was enthusiastically encouraging everyone to get back to the workplace with messages like this.
Gove said the latest guidance was a ‘change of emphasis’ but it wasn’t that, of course, it was a massive reverse ferret.
Here are the only 7 responses you need.
1.
"Stay at home"
*Stays at home*
"What the fuck are you doing"
"I-"
"GET BACK TO WORK"
"But-"
"BUY A FUCKING SANDWICH"
*Goes back to work*
"Oh you've really gone and done it now, you assholes, you morons-" — James Felton (@JimMFelton) September 22, 2020
2.
Work from home if you can but also lose your job if you don’t go back to the office. Seems perfectly clear to me. — James O'Brien (@mrjamesob) September 22, 2020
3.
According to Michael Gove today "people should work from home when they can" likely foreshadowing PM announce later. So the push to get people back is now reversed. This was clearly coming. This is direly inconsistent and unprofessional message management. — Martin Lewis (@MartinSLewis) September 22, 2020
4.
Last week:
-get back to work or get the sack!
-buy a sandwich to save Pret This week:
-work from home
-fuck Pret — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) September 22, 2020
5.
The predictable “work from home if you can” announcement has only brought to the fore the month-long stint of newspaper columnists trying to cattle-prod people back to the office. Propaganda for the landlord class — Matt Zarb-Cousin (@mattzarb) September 21, 2020
6.
https://twitter.com/davemacladd/status/1308345850679234562?s=20
7.
You might almost conclude they don't know what they're doing. https://t.co/4RYKm9rmRY — Jo Maugham QC (@JolyonMaugham) September 22, 2020
To conclude …
Wearily wakes up and checks news to find out whether I’m staying home because I’m a lazy coward who’s going to get fired or a hero protecting the NHS — James Felton (@JimMFelton) September 22, 2020
Source Twitter @BBCBreakfast