thepoke--2020-10-02--Donald Trump has tested positive for coronavirus – our 29+ favourite reactions

After months of downplaying the virus , suggesting ridiculous cures and dismissing many of the measures intended to protect people @ @ @ @ @ well as his wife , Melania – has tested positive for Covid-19 .
In a @ @ @ @ @ fast ” moment , he posted these two tweets .
Some might even say he @ @ @ @ @ Karma , if they ’ d seen this clip .
Obviously , we hope the @ @ @ @ @ .
Naturally , such huge news consumed Twitter , and these posts really stood out @ @ @ @ @ .
FAKE NEWS !
Others accepted it but weren ’ t overflowing with sympathy .

News
After months of downplaying the virus, suggesting ridiculous cures and dismissing many of the measures intended to protect people, Donald Trump – as well as his wife, Melania – has tested positive for Covid-19.
In a “Life comes at you fast” moment, he posted these two tweets.
Hope Hicks, who has been working so hard without even taking a small break, has just tested positive for Covid 19. Terrible! The First Lady and I are waiting for our test results. In the meantime, we will begin our quarantine process! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) October 2, 2020
Tonight, @FLOTUS and I tested positive for COVID-19. We will begin our quarantine and recovery process immediately. We will get through this TOGETHER! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) October 2, 2020
Some might even say he’d tested positive for Karma, if they’d seen this clip.
Donald Trump mocks Hillary Clinton over her pneumonia outbreak pic.twitter.com/feHjV6cLDa — The Telegraph (@Telegraph) October 2, 2016
Obviously, we hope the couple make a swift recovery.
Naturally, such huge news consumed Twitter, and these posts really stood out.
Some were quite sceptical. FAKE NEWS!
1.
It’s his Get Out Of A Debate And An Election Loss Free Card. pic.twitter.com/2jIFlUh30d — Susan Murray (@ThatSusanMurray) October 2, 2020
2.
No he doesn’t. — Katherine Ryan (@Kathbum) October 2, 2020
Others accepted it but weren’t overflowing with sympathy.
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HAVE YOU GOT ANY BLEACH pic.twitter.com/SvWqzcZhiZ — cluedont (@cluedont) October 2, 2020
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Breaking: Trump says he cannot release the results of his Covid test because they are under audit — Sarah Cooper (@sarahcpr) October 2, 2020
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How unlucky that Melania caught coronavirus too. She can’t have been in close contact with Trump for more than a few minutes. — Stig Abell (@StigAbell) October 2, 2020
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'…And that, boys and girls, is how, way back in 2020, Kamala Harris became the first black woman president of America, and the world was – just – saved.' — Jake Yapp – see bio for ALL THE PODCASTS (@jakeyapp) October 2, 2020
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Kickstarter to buy him some bleach and a hyperdermic. https://t.co/dpIc729uLA — Russ (@RussInCheshire) October 2, 2020
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Bet he's made a living will that stipulates they have to Weekend At Bernie's him for an entire second term. — Sam Whyte (@SamWhyte) October 2, 2020
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Fire up the "It's Always Sunny" theme music pic.twitter.com/lDkHarsJMu — (Poetic) Justice delos Santos (@justdelossantos) October 2, 2020
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It’s the coronavirus I feel sorry for. — Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) October 2, 2020
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NOW it's "COVID-19"… — Katie Phang (@KatiePhang) October 2, 2020
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It makes a change for Donald Trump to be trending for something positive. — Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) October 2, 2020
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Turns out the answer to the cognitive test was "Person, Woman, MASK, camera, TV" pic.twitter.com/Ve3fwqk16R — Robin Flavell (@RobinFlavell) October 2, 2020
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if donald trump and mike pence are incapacitated, the novel coronavirus assumes the presidency and this sort of anachronism is precisely why america needs a new constitutional convention — alex kealy (@alexkealy) October 2, 2020
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Probably the first time he's passed a test without sending someone else to take it for him. — nick revell (@TheNickRevell) October 2, 2020
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thepoke--2020-10-02--This line in a food article fits perfectly to the tune of Eleanor Rigby

Writer James Felton had Eleanor Rigby trending on Twitter when he spotted that this bit of copy could be sung @ @ @ @ @ Emily Leary ably demonstrated how well it works .
Too well for her peace of @ @ @ @ @ this post went up , Twitter went down .
It looks like James actually broke @ @ @ @ @ you ’ ve missed the news , James has a book out .
Finally , @ @ @ @ @ spotted something similar to the Eleanor Rigby line .
NO !
No more – please @ @ @ @ @ tweets that can be sung to the tune of Eleanor Rigby are oddly satisfying

Twitter
Writer James Felton had Eleanor Rigby trending on Twitter when he spotted that this bit of copy could be sung to the same tune.
[To the tune of Eleanor Rigby] pic.twitter.com/pjbNUtPvrF — James Felton (@JimMFelton) October 1, 2020
Emily Leary ably demonstrated how well it works. Too well for her peace of mind.
My brain tonight when I’m trying to sleep. I hate you. pic.twitter.com/ihrQ3KT0tC — Emily Leary (@AMummyToo) October 1, 2020
Not long after this post went up, Twitter went down. It looks like James actually broke the internet.
Here’s how people reacted.
I HATE HOW WELL THIS WORKS https://t.co/HcYvvITOIz — witch's drew 🧙♀⚢| black lives matter (@drawedbernstein) October 2, 2020
Oh lord, that is going around my head now, it's stuck forever every time I cook rice and it probably will have bloody coconut cream now. Can I resist a whole song parody? Hmm Hope headline writer had Eleanor Rigby on mind…#EleanorRigby #internalplaylist #cantunseethis https://t.co/q2NFAJzfpz — Jackie Holmes (@saidthedormouse) October 1, 2020
You’ve been cooking rice wrong your whole life.
Dur-dur-dur-dur-dur-duuuurrr…
*pause*
And so has your wife. — Dan Howdle (@DanHowdle) October 1, 2020
So THATS why she’s been picking up the rice in the church where the wedding has been! — Dim View (@RajWorks) October 1, 2020
Article by Father McKenzie? Writing the cooking instructions that no one will read. — Random Hajile (@EliModnar) October 1, 2020
In case you’ve missed the news, James has a book out.
You like tweets about rice recipes that can be read to the tune of Eleanor Rigby? You'll LOVE my new book about the Sun newspaper, this is a good segue.https://t.co/Q8wVAJYzBt — James Felton (@JimMFelton) October 1, 2020
Finally, Gloria Sice O’Lation spotted something similar to the Eleanor Rigby line.
Today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw it back to you… pic.twitter.com/4FRas8ex3L — Gloria Sice O'Lation (@GloriaSlap) October 1, 2020
NO! No more – please!
READ MORE
This man’s tweets that can be sung to the tune of Eleanor Rigby are oddly satisfying
Source James Felton Image James Felton, Screengrab, @pillepriske on Unsplash


thepoke--2020-10-02--This man fell asleep on a road trip and his wife started an epic photoshop battle – the 15 best entr

This man fell asleep on a road trip and his wife started an epic photoshop battle – the 15 best entries

When Sharea Overman ‘ s husband nodded off during a car journey , she snapped a sneaky photo of him @ @ @ @ @ .
The story made it onto Bored Panda , from where we picked the funniest @ @

Pics
When Sharea Overman‘s husband nodded off during a car journey, she snapped a sneaky photo of him and set Facebook a challenge.
The story made it onto Bored Panda, from where we picked the funniest images.
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thepoke--2020-10-02--Naga Munchetty could barely hold it together after Carol Kirkwood’s NSFW weather update

BBC Breakfast ’ s weather presenter , Carol Kirkwood , had Naga Munchetty struggling to keep a straight face with @ @ @ @ @ morning .
It wasn ’ t the first time Carol has provided an accidentally NSFW @ @ @ @ @ Who could forget this ?
Probably a few balls blowi …no .
Never mind .
@ @ @ @ @ it together over goat yoga but Mrs Squirrel sent him over the edge

Videos
BBC Breakfast’s weather presenter, Carol Kirkwood, had Naga Munchetty struggling to keep a straight face with some accidental innuendo on Thursday morning.
Here’s what happened.
“Won’t be playing much tennis!” “Not much tennis, did you say?” “Not much, no. Balls will be blowing everywhere.“
Some viewers spotted the gaffe.
“The balls will be blowing everywhere … tennis balls.”@carolkirkwood might have got away with it too, were it not for Naga 😂 @BBCBreakfast — Rossignol 🇪🇺🌴3.5% (@RossignolUK) October 1, 2020
Good old @TVNaga01 having a chuckle at blowing balls on @BBCBreakfast just now😂😂 — Gareth © 🎱🏴 (@friendly_farmer) October 1, 2020
@carolkirkwood you’ve done it again 🤭😂 really made me giggle – need more giggles right now so thank you.🎾 — S Twentyman (@sj20man) October 1, 2020
It wasn’t the first time Carol has provided an accidentally NSFW moment with her forecasts. Who could forget this?
Yet further proof that @carolkirkwood is a National Treasure pic.twitter.com/Q2uzv9mtl5 — Greg James (@gregjames) August 10, 2020
Probably a few balls blowi …no. Never mind.
READ MORE
Simon McCoy just about kept it together over goat yoga but Mrs Squirrel sent him over the edge
Source BBC News Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-10-02--An SNP MP did a Dominic Cummings and people are furious – the only 5 reactions you need

An SNP MP has apologised for what can best be described as “ doing a Cummings ” , when she travelled to the House of Commons while suffering from Covid-19 .
Margaret Ferrier took the train for the 400-plus miles from Rutherglen & Hamilton West to London , despite experiencing symptoms and having taken a test .
Here ’ s her account of the shocking breach of safety laws .
ASLEF , the train drivers ’ union , had this totally justified condemnation .
In a bit of irony that would warrant an extra verse for Alanis , Margaret Ferrier @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Dominic Cummings to be sacked , or to resign .
Unlike Boris Johnson ’ s full-throated support for his SpAd , the SNP have been clear that her actions were unacceptable .
It doesn ’ t look like she ’ ll get a chance to deliver a bedtime story from Downing Street ’ s Rose Garden .
These five reactions say it all .
With characteristic eloquence , John Rain gave us the perfect visual reference .
But the last word must go to Janey Godley , who put her own very special @ @ @ @ @ @ @ nailed the whole Dominic Cummings saga in 20 seconds flat

News
An SNP MP has apologised for what can best be described as “doing a Cummings”, when she travelled to the House of Commons while suffering from Covid-19.
Margaret Ferrier took the train for the 400-plus miles from Rutherglen & Hamilton West to London, despite experiencing symptoms and having taken a test.
Here’s her account of the shocking breach of safety laws.
ASLEF, the train drivers’ union, had this totally justified condemnation.
Rail staff have worked throughout this pandemic to make sure the network could serve the public. We've worked day in, day out to keep our railway as safe as possible for passengers and staff. For an MP to get on a train knowing she has Covid-19 is both dangerous and disgraceful. https://t.co/AOK3n3C0wx — ASLEF (@ASLEFunion) October 1, 2020
In a bit of irony that would warrant an extra verse for Alanis, Margaret Ferrier had been very vocal in calling for Dominic Cummings to be sacked, or to resign.
Unlike Boris Johnson’s full-throated support for his SpAd, the SNP have been clear that her actions were unacceptable.
I have spoken with @MargaretFerrier this evening who fully accepts that what she did was wrong. Margaret will be referring herself to the parliamentary standards commissioner as well as the police. I am tonight suspending the whip from Margaret. https://t.co/1bCst4r5Pu — Ian Blackford (@Ianblackford_MP) October 1, 2020
This is utterly indefensible. It’s hard to express just how angry I feel on behalf of people across the country making hard sacrifices every day to help beat COVID. The rules apply to everyone and they’re in place to keep people safe. @Ianblackford_MP is right to suspend the whip https://t.co/9rgWpPKrOe — Nicola Sturgeon (@NicolaSturgeon) October 1, 2020
It doesn’t look like she’ll get a chance to deliver a bedtime story from Downing Street’s Rose Garden.
These five reactions say it all.
1.
Stand down, Margaret. Stand down. Please. — Stephen McGann (@StephenMcGann) October 1, 2020
2.
Remember, kids, anyone can be an MP. Don't let petty barriers like a complete absence of basic common sense and respect for the safety of others hold you back. https://t.co/uf32bneaDn — Ellie Cumbo (@EllieCumbo) October 1, 2020
3.
I apologise unreservedly for breaking Covid rules. After getting symptoms I took a test, went to a building with many old men in it and did a speech. Upon learning I was positive I immediately got on public transport all the way to Scotland, pausing only to gob on some diabetics. https://t.co/WcfNEKNNcU — James Felton (@JimMFelton) October 1, 2020
4.
SNP stepping up their independence campaign, by sending their own biological weapon into Westminster. 'Quick! Cough on the cabinet on your way out, then every November we'll celebrate Margaret Ferrier Night by standing too close to each other in groups of more than 6.' — Tiernan Douieb (@TiernanDouieb) October 1, 2020
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Fucking hell this statement gets worse as it goes along: • develops symptoms
• has test
(so far so good)
• feels better
• travels to parliament by train
(oh no, that’s quite bad)
• receives positive test
(oh shit, what will she do now?)
• GETS TRAIN BACK TO SCOTLAND https://t.co/kXKXUoPWEf — 🏳🌈 Max 🏳🌈 (@SpillerOfTea) October 1, 2020
With characteristic eloquence, John Rain gave us the perfect visual reference.
This whole thing reads like Sideshow Bob standing on rakes. https://t.co/sk93j8eIPi — John Rain (@MrKenShabby) October 1, 2020
via Gfycat
But the last word must go to Janey Godley, who put her own very special spin on it.
Margaret Ferrier “Frank get the door I’ve got the Covid and went on a train” #janeygodleyvoiceover pic.twitter.com/f41nbUZo0n — Janey Godley (@JaneyGodley) October 1, 2020
“Frank, get the door.“
READ MORE
Emily Maitlis just nailed the whole Dominic Cummings saga in 20 seconds flat
Source Margaret Ferrier Image Massimo Virgilio on Unsplash, Screengrab


thepoke--2020-10-02--‘I think this is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen. I’m choking’

We ’ d say this needs no introduction but that ’ s only because we don ’ t really know @ @ @ @ @ Needless to say , ‘ Right now at Food Farms there ’ s a range @ @ @ @ @ , low prices ’ courtesy of comedy actor , writer , musician and film maker @ @ @ @ @ we needed at the end of the longest week .
You can follow Greig Johnson @ @ @ @ @ on YouTube here and also over here on Facebook .
Here ’ s more of @ @ @ @ @

Videos
We’d say this needs no introduction but that’s only because we don’t really know how to introduce it.
Needless to say, ‘Right now at Food Farms there’s a range of great food at low, low prices’ courtesy of comedy actor, writer, musician and film maker Greig Johnson.
What you having for your tea? Sound on. pic.twitter.com/fiWkpKuwfi — Greig Johnson (@GreigARJohnson) September 28, 2020
Exactly what we needed at the end of the longest week.
I think this is the funniest thing I've ever seen. I'm choking. https://t.co/c78qkFmEGI — Darrell Maclaine (@maclockdown) October 2, 2020
Helpless belly laughs and actually crying laughing at this. My partner came running into my office to ask what was wrong. https://t.co/Oa7MlSRnKs — David Llewellyn (@TheDaiLlew) October 2, 2020
You can follow Greig Johnson on Twitter @GreigARJohnson and on YouTube here and also over here on Facebook.
Hello there new followers – hope you're well. Do consider having a peep at my YouTube. Here's as good a place to start as any:https://t.co/HUBO6s3AL8 — Greig Johnson (@GreigARJohnson) September 29, 2020
Here’s more of what you can expect!
Source Twitter @GreigARJohnson


thepoke--2020-10-02--Ted Cruz being reminded Donald Trump called his wife ugly is simply brutal

Just a brutal moment from CNN here when presenter Chris Cuomo was moved to remind Republican senator and one-time presidential @ @ @ @ @ Donald Trump said about his wife .
It began with Cuomo suggesting Cruz had not @ @ @ @ @ Trump after the first presidential debate ( this was before Trump tested positive for coronavirus @ @ @ @ @ when Cruz suggests the CNN man gets his brother on it , he ’ s @ @ @ @ @ s Democrat governor , Andrew Cuomo ) .
“ My brother will stand for his @ @ @ @ @ ’ t you talk to the president like you talk to my brother ?
You @ @ @ @ @ think he ’ ll smack you down at home ?
“ My brother ’ s @ @ @ @ @ ’ m talking about the president .
The one who called you a liar , @ @ @ @ @ wife was ugly .
That guy .
The one you won ’ t say anything @ @ @ @ @ said everyone at his rallies wore masks and this comeback was perfect

Videos
Just a brutal moment from CNN here when presenter Chris Cuomo was moved to remind Republican senator and one-time presidential hopeful Ted Cruz exactly what Donald Trump said about his wife.
It began with Cuomo suggesting Cruz had not done enough to criticise Donald Trump after the first presidential debate (this was before Trump tested positive for coronavirus).
“I’m talking about the President. The one who called your wife ugly!” 💀 pic.twitter.com/tNTWuw6sRs — Ana Kasparian (@AnaKasparian) October 1, 2020
Oof (and when Cruz suggests the CNN man gets his brother on it, he’s talking about New York’s Democrat governor, Andrew Cuomo).
“My brother will stand for his own record. Why don’t you talk to the president like you talk to my brother? You afraid of him? You think he’ll smack you down at home? “My brother’s not the president. I’m talking about the president. The one who called you a liar, the one who said your wife was ugly. That guy. The one you won’t say anything about.”
We just witnessed a murder on live television. — ✊🏾 Chris Jackson 🇺🇸 (@RealChrisJaxon) October 1, 2020
If anyone deserves that on live its ted cruz 😂 — iThinkWithMyhead (@Gtrealmacoy) October 1, 2020
You can see his soul leave his body — Wet Ass Pword (@like_argue) October 1, 2020
READ MORE
A Trump supporter said everyone at his rallies wore masks and this comeback was perfect
Source Twitter @AnaKasparian H/T Indy100


thepoke--2020-10-02--Strictly contestant HRVY’s got Covid and this joke scored perfect 10s all round

In other news , the new series of BBC1 ’ s Strictly Come Dancing has suffered a blow with the @ @ @ @ @ contestants , YouTuber HRVY , has coronavirus .
Chances are we wouldn ’ t ordinarily @ @ @ @ @ but over on Twitter @ fourfoot responded like this and , well , have a @ @ @ @ @ it got the attention of the man himself .
You can find @ fourfoot on @ @ @ @ @ s got a book out in the autumn ) .
And needless to say , @ @ @ @ @ swift recovery , HRVY .
Ian Hislop ’ s excuse for turning down Strictly was @

Twitter
In other news, the new series of BBC1’s Strictly Come Dancing has suffered a blow with the news that one of its contestants, YouTuber HRVY, has coronavirus.
Strictly Come Dancing contestant HRVY tests positive for coronavirus https://t.co/MiFE35eLby pic.twitter.com/aomIhSu5lb — ITV News (@itvnews) October 2, 2020
Chances are we wouldn’t ordinarily bother you with this, but over on Twitter @fourfoot responded like this and, well, have a look for yourself.
Perfect 10s all round!
And it got the attention of the man himself.
this made my day, thank you https://t.co/vUiujRjfS8 — hrvy (@HRVY) October 2, 2020
Boom.
Very, very good. Take the rest of the day off, you're done. — Jonathan Beeston (@beeston) October 2, 2020
To conclude …
A perfect tweet https://t.co/gMQItfbMNV — Jamie East (@jamieeast) October 2, 2020
You can find @fourfoot on Twitter here (he’s got a book out in the autumn).
And needless to say, we hope you make a swift recovery, HRVY.
READ MORE
Ian Hislop’s excuse for turning down Strictly was 10/10
Source @fourfoot


thepoke--2020-10-03--The Magic Key Series Pt.2 – Life in 2020

With this year being somewhat different to other years , we ’ ve reimagined some more of the books in @ @ @ @ @ for life in 2020 .

Exclusive
With this year being somewhat different to other years, we’ve reimagined some more of the books in the Magic Key series, for life in 2020.
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READ MORE:
The Magic Key Series – Life During Lockdown


thepoke--2020-10-03--Halloween, lockdown rules and the unexpected benefits of masks – 14 funny coronavirus tweets

There ’ s so much going on with the coronavirus that it ’ s really hard to keep up , @ @ @ @ @ confirm .
One good way of doing that is by reading what funny things people @ @ @ @ @ .
With that in mind , here are some of our favourite funny coronavirus posts @

Twitter
There’s so much going on with the coronavirus that it’s really hard to keep up, as the Prime Minister will confirm.
One good way of doing that is by reading what funny things people have been saying about it.
There’s good information in there, honest!
With that in mind, here are some of our favourite funny coronavirus posts.
1.
Has anyone got the contact deets for the lads that created the coronavirus?? I need a new one, but specifically for people who come to my house and eat my gluten-free snacks. — Tez (@tezilyas) September 26, 2020
2.
There are so many experts on here, I think I may have developed nerd immunity — David O'Doherty (@phlaimeaux) September 26, 2020
3.
I think the lockdown measures were written by the guy who drew that rabbit-duck illusion. You can go to the pub with 5 people as long as it also looks like you're at home by yourself. — Michael Spicer (@MrMichaelSpicer) September 29, 2020
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Halloween this year will be fun, the scariest costumes will be the ones without masks. — Ignacio Lopez (@comedylopez) September 30, 2020
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Wearing a mask in shops is great.
I saw an ex in Asda earlier, and it was so much easier for us to pretend we hadn’t noticed each other. — Neil (@_Enanem_) October 1, 2020
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I calculate I'm now thinking I've got Covid on average 6 times a week. This is the highest rate it's been since late May. — Tom Holland (@holland_tom) September 30, 2020
7.
Me just before Lockdown 1 vs me just before Lockdown 2. pic.twitter.com/qOA8xqjk0y — Jamie (@jami0mckay) September 30, 2020
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thepoke--2020-10-03--12 things that really suck about being an adult

Over on the r/AskReddit forum , u/berkel_is_a_madlad posed this question : “ Adults of reddit , what is something that @ @ @ @ @ that most teenagers don ’ t realize ?
” Well , there ’ s obviously @ @ @ @ @ sucks about being an adult , just as there are many things that absolutely stink @ @ @ @ @ so there were thousands of answers .
In case you were thinking everybody hates being @ @ @ @ @ s not true .
However , TikToker Kevin Anthony summed up the general feeling perfectly @ @ @ @ @ life skills they lack – these 15 are highly relatable

Popular
Over on the r/AskReddit forum, u/berkel_is_a_madlad posed this question:
“Adults of reddit, what is something that sucks about being an adult that most teenagers don’t realize?”
Well, there’s obviously a lot of stuff that sucks about being an adult, just as there are many things that absolutely stink about being a teen, so there were thousands of answers.
We picked our favourites.
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In case you were thinking everybody hates being grown up – it’s not true.
However, TikToker Kevin Anthony summed up the general feeling perfectly.
READ MORE
People are sharing the life skills they lack – these 15 are highly relatable
Source r/AskReddit Image r/AskReddit, Mick Haupt on Unsplash


thepoke--2020-10-03--Blur’s ‘Song 2’ but with every Woohoo by Mario is the earworm you’ll be happy to have

Over on YouTube , someone called The Pandemic Light has been inspired to combine those two cultural greats – Blur @ @ @ @ @ do .
Here ’ s how they explained the video .
Blur – “ Song @ @ @ @ @ ” Inspired by watching a livestream of Super Mario Odyssey for 6+ hours and hearing @ @ @ @ @ could hear them in my head while I was trying to sleep last night .
@ @ @ @ @ hear this in our heads for at least the next week .
This mash-up of @ @ @ @ @ simply glorious

Videos
Over on YouTube, someone called The Pandemic Light has been inspired to combine those two cultural greats – Blur and Mario. As you do.
Here’s how they explained the video.
Blur – “Song 2 (Odyssey Remix)”
Inspired by watching a livestream of Super Mario Odyssey for 6+ hours and hearing these sounds near-constantly until I could hear them in my head while I was trying to sleep last night.
And now we can all hear this in our heads for at least the next week.
As a bonus, here’s the unadulterated version.
READ MORE
This mash-up of Uptown Funk and Pingu is simply glorious
Source Laughing Squid Image Screengrab, Screengrab


thepoke--2020-10-03--Boris Johnson said the public’s “fraying discipline” had increased Covid numbers – 9 alternative sug

Boris Johnson said the public’s “fraying discipline” had increased Covid numbers – 9 alternative suggestions

In an effort to avoid calling a national lockdown , the government has been putting areas of particular concern under @ @ @ @ @ we ’ re currently watching those areas getting bigger and closer to one another .
@ @ @ @ @ , that the freckles are rapidly becoming an all-over tan .
During interviews with the @ @ @ @ @ that “ everybody got a bit , kind of complacent and blasé ” and “ @ @ @ @ @ was a bit of sort of fraying of people ’ s discipline “ .
There @ @ @ @ @ why the ‘ undisciplined ’ public found those comments particularly irritating , and Twitter spelt @ @ @ @ @ held a coronavirus briefing with nothing to say – our 7 favourite responses

Twitter
In an effort to avoid calling a national lockdown, the government has been putting areas of particular concern under more stringent measures, and we’re currently watching those areas getting bigger and closer to one another.
Imagine, if you will, that the freckles are rapidly becoming an all-over tan.
During interviews with the BBC, Boris Johnson said that “everybody got a bit, kind of complacent and blasé” and “what happened over the summer was a bit of sort of fraying of people’s discipline“.
Recent spike in UK coronavirus cases is result of "fraying of people's discipline" over the summer, Boris Johnson says https://t.co/jip7aZ6mhA — BBC News (UK) (@BBCNews) October 2, 2020
There were one or two reasons why the ‘undisciplined’ public found those comments particularly irritating, and Twitter spelt them out.
1.
Why did people get complacent when they were told clearly to get back to work but stay at home, don’t meet your family but go to pubs full of strangers, follow the rules unless you are Cummings or my father..?https://t.co/v8LpLYqR7t — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) October 2, 2020
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You literally *paid us* to go eat in restaurants. https://t.co/cNuPbDzVBJ — David (@dmk1793) October 2, 2020
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Always great to hear Boris Johnson (3 marriages, countless infidelities, unknown number of children, numerous sackings and indiscretions….) opining on the "fraying of people's discipline" — Peter Smith (@Redpeter99) October 2, 2020
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Hi I’m Boris Johnson, you may remember me from such hits as “back to work or risk getting fired” and “it’s your patriotic duty to go get shitfaced”. Today I’ll be explaining how any deaths are your fault. https://t.co/0nhUmT2g7V — James Felton (@JimMFelton) October 2, 2020
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"Everyone got complacent" says man who told entire population to go the pub, go to work, go to restaurants and defends his mates who break the rules. https://t.co/zTJT3A1RHm — TechnicallyRon (@TechnicallyRon) October 2, 2020
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He's the sort of person who'd come to your party, take a shit in the middle of your kitchen, then call up the next day to tell you, you live in unhygienic squalor and shouldn't have allowed someone to shit in your kitchen. https://t.co/ZsVFH5AN14 — Tiernan Douieb (@TiernanDouieb) October 2, 2020
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Boris Johnson suffers from a rare condition where, if he ever accepts responsibility for something, he will literally die. https://t.co/3b5dVf6bV9 — Jonn Elledge and so forth (@JonnElledge) October 2, 2020
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We've had
Stay home, save lives
Stay alert
Return to work
Patriotic duty to go to the pub
Eat out to help out
Keep distance, 2 metres, maybe 1?
Moral duty to send kids to school
Wear a mask
Work at home if you can.
Plus
Cummings
Test & trace fiasco & he blames the public! — Unicorn Stopper 3.5% 🎪 🏴 🇪🇺🇺🇳 (@LenoreSimson) October 2, 2020
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NOT TO BLAME
▪Cummings eye test
▪Testing giga-shambles
▪Track and trace catastrofail
▪Telling people to go to pubs, go back to work, eat out etc
▪Spaffing billions on private firms with no expertise
▪PM who doesn’t know own rules TO BLAME
The public https://t.co/ETUq7uTx7h — David Schneider (@davidschneider) October 2, 2020
Journalist Michael Deacon gave the government some free advice.
"Take Back Control" and "Get Brexit Done" were great slogans, not so sure about "It's All Your Fault You Feckless Scum" https://t.co/NViBl2tG6d — Michael Deacon (@MichaelPDeacon) October 2, 2020
READ MORE
Boris Johnson held a coronavirus briefing with nothing to say – our 7 favourite responses
Source BBC News Image Screengrab, Screengrab


thepoke--2020-10-04--Jim Carrey just made his debut as Joe Biden on Saturday Night Live and it’s uncanny

You ’ ll be familiar with Alec Baldwin ’ s turn as Donald Trump on Saturday Night Live but you @ @ @ @ @ Jim Carrey as Joe Biden .
Here he is making his debut last night .
@ @ @ @ @ , starting with our favourite .
‘ Took a pic of the cat looking out @ @ @ @ @ him into some sort of god ’

Videos
You’ll be familiar with Alec Baldwin’s turn as Donald Trump on Saturday Night Live but you probably haven’t seen Jim Carrey as Joe Biden.
Here he is making his debut last night.
And there’s more, starting with our favourite.
"Imagine if science, and karma, could somehow team up to send us all a message about how dangerous this virus can be…..I'm not saying I want it to happen….but imagine if it did." @JimCarrey #SNLPremiere pic.twitter.com/RqbxcunZFl — Austin (@rondarouseyszn) October 4, 2020
Harry on SNL with Jim Carrey tonight (via @thisbemesara)pic.twitter.com/Zk1wqiw1zq — HSD (@hsdaily) October 4, 2020
SNL jokes about Pres. Trump’s COVID diagnosis for the first time during the opening skit with Jim Carrey as Joe Biden: pic.twitter.com/Sc4cX55iRA — Alex Salvi (@alexsalvinews) October 4, 2020
WAP takes on a whole new meaning. #SNLPremiere pic.twitter.com/V9RPI8MRy8 — Saturday Night Live – SNL (@nbcsnl) October 4, 2020
READ MORE
‘Took a pic of the cat looking out the window and accidentally turned him into some sort of god’
Source Twitter @nbcsnl


thepoke--2020-10-04--‘Took a pic of the cat looking out the window and accidentally turned him into some sort of god’

Not the first cat to be pictured looking out of the window .
But probably the first one to end @ @ @ @ @ This cat getting ready to surprise this dog is simply brilliant

Pics
Not the first cat to be pictured looking out of the window. But probably the first one to end up looking like this.
Took a pic of the cat lookin out the window and accidentally turned him into some sort of god. pic.twitter.com/xjN4W6peSJ — Amanda (@cloudcat28) October 1, 2020
All hail Clyde.
Cat God appreciates the 1m likes… I think. ❤ pic.twitter.com/4eh8hig3BQ — Amanda (@cloudcat28) October 3, 2020
And this, from the Downing Street cat.
It was no accident… https://t.co/YVFExZroPq — Larry the Cat (@Number10cat) October 3, 2020
READ MORE
This cat getting ready to surprise this dog is simply brilliant
Source Twitter @cloudcat28


thepoke--2020-10-04--Angry pedestrian suffers instant karma

Angry pedestrian suffers instant karma

Never less than satisfying when this sort of thing happens .
If only life always worked out as well as @ @ @ @ @ reminded you of another video , you weren ’ t alone .
‘ I grew @ @ @ @ @ always thought jaywalking was some BS made up on old cartoons .
Till this day @ @ @ @ @ it .
It ’ s strange that he walked in front of the only car @ @ @ @ @ ’ RabbleRhouser ‘ You misunderstand , this is HIS road , it ’ s not @ @ @ @ @ have waited , or hustled across the street , he wanted to cross there so @ @ @ @ @ did and he did it how he wanted.
’ Justin_Other_Bot This cat getting ready to @ @ @ @ @ brilliant

Videos
Never less than satisfying when this sort of thing happens.
If only life always worked out as well as this.
And if it reminded you of another video, you weren’t alone.
‘I grew up on an island and always thought jaywalking was some BS made up on old cartoons. Till this day I have a hard believing it. It’s strange that he walked in front of the only car on the road though …’ RabbleRhouser ‘You misunderstand, this is HIS road, it’s not about the fact he could have waited, or hustled across the street, he wanted to cross there so that’s what he did and he did it how he wanted.’ Justin_Other_Bot
READ MORE
This cat getting ready to surprise this dog is simply brilliant
Source Reddit u/Mrs3anw


thepoke--2020-10-04--This cat getting ready to surprise this dog is simply brilliant

The dog ’ s coming home so this cat gets ready to give it the fright of its life .
@ @ @ @ @ of the dog ’ s response , maybe it does it every time it comes @ @ @ @ @ every moment of it .
‘ I like how the cat reaches his ambush position @ @ @ @ @ in while he waits.
’ battle_formations ‘ You always got to look your best when @ @ @ @ @ stone cold murder someone.
’ BobbyNo09 ‘ This is the best thing I have seen @ @ @ @ @ ll tell you that I have seen a lot of good things all day.
’ @ @ @ @ @ and hard about hitting this dog is 36 seconds very well spent

Videos
The dog’s coming home so this cat gets ready to give it the fright of its life. Although, by the looks of the dog’s response, maybe it does it every time it comes home.
And we love every moment of it.
Brilliant.
‘I like how the cat reaches his ambush position and gets a quick grooming in while he waits.’ battle_formations ‘You always got to look your best when you’re about to stone cold murder someone.’ BobbyNo09 ‘This is the best thing I have seen all day and I’ll tell you that I have seen a lot of good things all day.’ LOL_WhyT
READ MORE
This cat thinking long and hard about hitting this dog is 36 seconds very well spent
Source Reddit u/farrukhsshah Gfycat


thepoke--2020-10-04--Turns out pedestrians do it differently in Poland

A map of what pedestrians , or rather pedestrian signs , look like across Europe .
‘ We are unique @ @ @ @ @ shared it over on Reddit .
And just a few of our favourite things people @ @ @ @ @ He is going to Siberia.
’ ghueber ‘ I like how they all seem to @ @ @ @ @ like he ’ s the one in the group that just farted but tries to @ @ @ @ @ ‘ The only one coming back is Lithuania.
’ aGuyF0rm ‘ The floors in Poland @ @ @ @ @ to walk on.
’ WonderfulAntlion ‘ Am Polish , can confirm .
We levitate over @ @ @ @ @ vodka.
’ TommyBoomstik 17 of the funniest and weirdest shop signs around

Pics
A map of what pedestrians, or rather pedestrian signs, look like across Europe.
‘We are unique,’ said DeadeyeStan639 who shared it over on Reddit.
And just a few of our favourite things people said about it.
‘What happened to Russia.’ duckipn ‘He is going to Siberia.’ ghueber ‘I like how they all seem to turn away from Poland, like he’s the one in the group that just farted but tries to hide it anyway.’ Mr_Otterswamp ‘The only one coming back is Lithuania.’ aGuyF0rm ‘The floors in Poland, they are too polished to walk on.’ WonderfulAntlion ‘Am Polish, can confirm. We levitate over the pedestrian crossing after drinking vodka.’ TommyBoomstik
READ MORE
17 of the funniest and weirdest shop signs around
Source Reddit u/DeadeyeStan639


thepoke--2020-10-05--Victoria Derbyshire’s takedown of this Trump supporter over the president’s drive-past was just magn

Victoria Derbyshire’s takedown of this Trump supporter over the president’s drive-past was just magnificent

Over on BBC News , Greg Swenson of Republicans Overseas has been defending Donald Trump ’ s decision to get @ @ @ @ @ drive-past of his supporters outside the hospital where h ’ s being treated for Covid-19 @ @ @ @ @ mainstream media and the left for making a big deal out of it ’ despite @ @ @ @ @ insanity .
And presenter Victoria Derbyshire wasn ’ t having any of it , she @ @ @ @ @ and it ’ s a brilliant watch .
This doctor ’ s powerful response to @ @ @ @ @ is surely the only one you need

Videos
Over on BBC News, Greg Swenson of Republicans Overseas has been defending Donald Trump’s decision to get in a car for a drive-past of his supporters outside the hospital where he’s being treated for Covid-19.
Swenson blamed the ‘mainstream media and the left for making a big deal out of it’ despite one doctor describing it as insanity.
And presenter Victoria Derbyshire wasn’t having any of it, she really wasn’t.
Victoria Derbyshire taking no shit, from Greg Swenson(Republicans Overseas) after trump took a ride in a motorcade. "When you've got coronavirus you're just like every other patient… you're not special… you're not not infectious because you're the President." pic.twitter.com/5wBQlosW3l — Haggis_UK 🇬🇧 🇪🇺 (@Haggis_UK) October 5, 2020
Absolutely the perfect response.
That was delicious to watch. Derbyshire was of course completely right and he had no idea how to answer that. — Sparxy (@SparxyUK) October 5, 2020
READ MORE
This doctor’s powerful response to Donald Trump’s drive-past is surely the only one you need
Source @Haggis_UKL


thepoke--2020-10-05--‘Best reply to a football tweet today’

‘Best reply to a football tweet today’

We ’ re grateful to journalist @ IanRidley1 for sharing this screenshot of what he calls the ‘ best reply @ @ @ @ @ ’ .
And surely not just today .
You won ’ t see a worse @ @ @ @ @ 19 seconds of football all season

Twitter
We’re grateful to journalist @IanRidley1 for sharing this screenshot of what he calls the ‘best reply to a football tweet today’.
And surely not just today.
Brilliant.
https://twitter.com/Joel__CFC/status/1312656079118127105?s=20
https://twitter.com/Chriscleghorn4/status/1312696975654084608?s=20
READ MORE
You won’t see a worse (or more comical) 19 seconds of football all season
Source Twitter @IanRidley1 @slothrr


thepoke--2020-10-05--Tom Hollander’s brilliant ‘A Life in the Day’ might be the best one ever

Actor Tom Hollander ’ s done the Sunday Times ’ ‘ Life in the Day ’ feature and it might @ @ @ @ @ .
Here are just two of our favourite bits which give you a pretty good @ @ @ @ @ and the brilliance ) of the whole thing .
This is how he starts his @ @ @ @ @ few of the things people were saying about it .
Read this fantastic ‘ day @ @ @ @ @ Baker ’ from the Sunday Times in 1978

Celebrity
Actor Tom Hollander’s done the Sunday Times’ ‘Life in the Day’ feature and it might be the best one ever.
Tom Hollander’s A Life in the Day is quite brilliant. pic.twitter.com/rcyRBDMvzL — Siansparkles (@siansparkles) October 4, 2020
Here are just two of our favourite bits which give you a pretty good idea of the tone (and the brilliance) of the whole thing.
This is how he starts his day.
And a bit later.
And just a few of the things people were saying about it.
I spit my drink out when I read ‘masturbate and doze’ – very, very funny. I like how it’s so matter of fact – like he’s doing the washing up or something — John Peters (@JohnPeters29) October 4, 2020
I had no feelings at all for him one way or another before this but now I fully love him. https://t.co/Z3dB1eVZAt — Jane Slavin (@JaneSlavin) October 4, 2020
‘Turn off the radio as the Archers starts’ is basically my relationship with Radio 4 in a nutshell — HelenS (@HelenRightNow) October 4, 2020
We are all Tom Hollander. — Kieran Garland (@KieranJGarland) October 4, 2020
Really hoping Hollander isn’t working on a novel. I might be out of business. https://t.co/B8z48jWpN9 — John Niven HQ (@estellecostanza) October 4, 2020
To conclude …
This is fabulous https://t.co/CbdspZFbfv — Sue Perkins (@sueperkins) October 4, 2020
READ MORE
Read this fantastic ‘day in the life of Tom Baker’ from the Sunday Times in 1978
Source Times H/T @siansparkles Image screenshot BBC


thepoke--2020-10-05--A would-be haggler had no comeback for this devastating own

This exchange from the OfferUp selling app made its way to Reddit , and we ’ ve probably never seen @ @ @ @ @ ’ of a chancer trying to argue the price down .
This is what Redditors @ @ @ @ @ ‘ s post .
A couple of Reddit users imagined the scenario if the offer @ @ @ @ @ could have SUCH FUN with that and a hundred dollars .
Nope , it ’ @ @ @ @ @ the Magi than that .

Weird World
This exchange from the OfferUp selling app made its way to Reddit, and we’ve probably never seen a more perfect ‘gotcha’ of a chancer trying to argue the price down.
from Chris Pratt GIFs via Gfycat
This is what Redditors had to say about u/theredhound19‘s post.
A couple of Reddit users imagined the scenario if the offer had been accepted.
I could have SUCH FUN with that and a hundred dollars.
“1”
WHEEEEEEE!! LETS DO IT AGAIN!!!
fogobum
Nope, it’s even more Gift of the Magi than that.


thepoke--2020-10-05--This doctor’s powerful response to Donald Trump’s drive-past is surely the only one you need

Donald Trump ’ s treatment for coronavirus has been unconventional in a number of ways .
One of which was @ @ @ @ @ taken on a little drive to wave to his supporters outside of the hospital where @ @ @ @ @ .
The drive broke his government ’ s own public health guidelines requiring patients to @ @ @ @ @ while in treatment .
But we ’ re not a doctor , obviously .
But @ @ @ @ @ it ’ s surely the only response you need .
He also said this .
@ @ @ @ @ only furious and utterly dumbfounded response , as you might imagine .
Here ’ s @ @ @ @ @ his father to the virus had to say .
But just in the interests of @ @ @ @ @ some people were delighted .
Like the president and co-founder of something called ‘ Trump @ @ @ @ @ ( not a parody ) .
Jim Carrey just made his debut as Joe Biden @ @ @ @ @ it ’ s uncanny

Twitter
Donald Trump’s treatment for coronavirus has been unconventional in a number of ways.
One of which was that the US president was taken on a little drive to wave to his supporters outside of the hospital where he’s being treated.
President Trump, wearing a mask, rides by his supporters outside Walter Reed while in the back of a Suburban. pic.twitter.com/nsCJyYXHdK — Kaitlan Collins (@kaitlancollins) October 4, 2020
The drive broke his government’s own public health guidelines requiring patients to isolate as much as possible while in treatment.
But we’re not a doctor, obviously. But this person is, and it’s surely the only response you need.
Every single person in the vehicle during that completely unnecessary Presidential “drive-by” just now has to be quarantined for 14 days. They might get sick. They may die. For political theater. Commanded by Trump to put their lives at risk for theater. This is insanity. — Dr. James P. Phillips, MD (@DrPhillipsMD) October 4, 2020
He also said this.
That Presidential SUV is not only bulletproof, but hermetically sealed against chemical attack. The risk of COVID19 transmission inside is as high as it gets outside of medical procedures. The irresponsibility is astounding. My thoughts are with the Secret Service forced to play. — Dr. James P. Phillips, MD (@DrPhillipsMD) October 4, 2020
It wasn’t the only furious and utterly dumbfounded response, as you might imagine. Here’s what a man who lost his father to the virus had to say.
My father died of Covid alone in a hospital. I had to say goodbye to him over a phone. Trump got a joyride to sooth his desperate need for attention, while endangering the lives of the Secret Service people in the car with him. To hell with him and all who enable him. — Curtis Armstrong (@curtisisbooger) October 5, 2020
But just in the interests of balance and all that, some people were delighted. Like the president and co-founder of something called ‘Trump Students’, for instance (not a parody).
Trump left Walter Reed to do a drive by parade for supporters gathered outside. That’s MY President! 👏🏻 — Ryan Fournier (@RyanAFournier) October 4, 2020
To conclude (very possibly) …
i suspect this drive through is going to haunt Trump. not because he needlessly exposed a lot of people but because for someone so image conscious he looked ridiculous. a slow speed drive by by sick old man needing a boost from a small crowd of fans. not a good look. — Josh Marshall (@joshtpm) October 5, 2020
READ MORE
Jim Carrey just made his debut as Joe Biden on Saturday Night Live and it’s uncanny
Source @kaitlancollins @DrPhillipsMD


thepoke--2020-10-05--This hilarious 2002 Rik Mayall clip is being shared again because it seems to predict Brexit

This clip from a 2002 Rik Mayall show , Believe Nothing , might just make you believe that he had @ @ @ @ @ “ So , Britain will leave the European Union and once more be a quaint @ @ @ @ @ we will be able to manipulate effortlessly as our very own offshore island.
” The @ @ @ @ @ tweet , with people reacting in amazement at the apparent accuracy of the episode .
@ @ @ @ @ almost quoted Karl Marx , with this observation .
This old Fry and Laurie sketch @ @ @ @ @ basically sums up Brexit

Videos
This clip from a 2002 Rik Mayall show, Believe Nothing, might just make you believe that he had the power of prediction.
“So, Britain will leave the European Union and once more be a quaint and backward backwater, which we will be able to manipulate effortlessly as our very own offshore island.”
The clip resurfaced in a now-locked tweet, with people reacting in amazement at the apparent accuracy of the episode.
OMG…. brilliant find. Scarily accurate. However that was satire and now it’s reality. What a long way the UK has come….. — FrenchSteve64 (@french_steve64) October 1, 2020
You see, I knew that they must have got the idea for #brexit from somewhere. Can we bring back #rikmayall so we can all give him a royal ass whupping for his prescience. RIP Rik. Legend. — ModerateUK 🌍🌎🌏🇬🇧🇪🇺🇩🇪🏳🌈 (@ModerateUK) October 2, 2020
The canned laughter at how ridiculous it sounds in 2002 sums up the state of this place now. Last 5 seconds is pretty much the aim of Brexit…. 🤯 — Pete Dobosz (@PeteDobosz) October 2, 2020
Writer, Iain Overton, almost quoted Karl Marx, with this observation.
History repeats itself. First time as comedy. Then as tragedy. Cough. https://t.co/2gXvVkm9cA — Iain Overton (@iainoverton) October 1, 2020
READ MORE
This old Fry and Laurie sketch is going viral because it basically sums up Brexit
Source Indy100 Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-10-05--The funny twist in this cat rescue story makes it our Good News of the Day

Alan McElligott is clearly an animal lover .
When the Associate Professor in animal behaviour heard the muffled cries of @ @ @ @ @ recycling bin as he dropped off a donation , he naturally did the humane thing @ @ @ @ @ .
We ’ ll let him tell the story .
Better safe than sorry – @ @ @ @ @ reckon .
Here ’ s what people have been saying about the mix-up .
It @ @ @ @ @ first time something like this had happened .
In case you were wondering , Alan @ @ @ @ @ This lovely tale of a duckling rescue mission is exactly the good news story we @ @ @

Weird World
Alan McElligott is clearly an animal lover. When the Associate Professor in animal behaviour heard the muffled cries of a trapped cat in a recycling bin as he dropped off a donation, he naturally did the humane thing and called the emergency services.
We’ll let him tell the story.
I went to a recycling bin to dump old clothes. heard the cries of a cat inside, so called local police to get it out. Police confirmed cat cries. 90 min later, Fire Brigade came to break open the bin. the “cat” turned out toy, battery-powered one, with very convincing meows! 😂🤦♂ pic.twitter.com/i39vJzro6B — Alan McElligott (@AMCELL) October 4, 2020
Better safe than sorry – that’s what we reckon.
Here’s what people have been saying about the mix-up.
You thought your good intentions backfired…. Read this https://t.co/0gqa7dFR3D — meena kandasamy || இளவேனில் (@meenakandasamy) October 4, 2020
Your feel-good story of the day https://t.co/Tu7WApjB6V — Anna Megill (@cynixy) October 4, 2020
This means you are a good human, even if a toy. It could have easily been real. Thank you for being kind X — Marina #wash your hands and wear a mask 😷🙏♥ (@HathorGoddess) October 4, 2020
It isn’t even the first time something like this had happened.
See we don't always rescue them out of trees! I once rescued a life size toy flamingo out of a burning skip once. We named him Phil and he became our fire station mascot. — Antonia (@Flaminhaystack) October 5, 2020
In case you were wondering, Alan gave us an update.
The “cat” has now been safely rehomed, or maybe detained, by the police 😸 — Alan McElligott (@AMCELL) October 4, 2020
READ MORE
This lovely tale of a duckling rescue mission is exactly the good news story we needed right now
Source Alan McElligott Image Alan McElligott


thepoke--2020-10-05--People can’t stop watching this viral video of a dancing cowboy standoff set to Fleetwood Mac

A very unusual video has been popping up on just about every social media outlet over the last couple of @ @ @ @ @ views across all platforms and almost as many comments .
People can ’ t stop @ @ @ @ @ – but we ’ re not entirely sure why .
See for yourself .
The @ @ @ @ @ actor Matt Cutshall , is like West Side Story meets Brokeback Mountain with a Fleetwood @ @ @ @ @ not a mash-up we ’ d have predicted to go viral , but we are @ @ @ @ @ are some of the best reactions we ’ ve spotted .
Over on Instagram , @ @ @ @ @ this to say .
“ If this doesn ’ t become a highly marketed workout @ @ @ @ @ ” There ’ s a reason why this dancer ’ s Tina Turner act has @ @ @ @ @ yourself

Pics
A very unusual video has been popping up on just about every social media outlet over the last couple of days, with millions of views across all platforms and almost as many comments.
People can’t stop watching it – including us – but we’re not entirely sure why.
See for yourself.
The post, by musician and actor Matt Cutshall, is like West Side Story meets Brokeback Mountain with a Fleetwood Mac soundtrack – which is not a mash-up we’d have predicted to go viral, but we are where we are.
Here are some of the best reactions we’ve spotted.
I don’t know what part of TikTok I’m on tbh pic.twitter.com/Kt4nxCwHav — Washington Post TikTok Guy 🎃 (@davejorgenson) September 30, 2020
who let this happen pic.twitter.com/l78aLs8xPw — Driver Jehu (@driverjehu9) October 1, 2020
I LOVE THIS TO DEATH https://t.co/RAXc8NA4pN — Cindy Gallop (@cindygallop) September 30, 2020
Can't…learning a new dance rn https://t.co/K8glMdqEbR — TheHombreFromNowhere (@ElSkreletron) October 1, 2020
Over on Instagram, blogger Sarah Nicole Landry had this to say.
“If this doesn’t become a highly marketed workout video I will be sad.”
We’d settle for a gif.
READ MORE
There’s a reason why this dancer’s Tina Turner act has gone viral – see for yourself
Source Matt Cutshall Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-10-05--The 9 best takedowns of Boris Johnson telling the public to “behave fearlessly but with common sense

The 9 best takedowns of Boris Johnson telling the public to “behave fearlessly but with common sense”

Boris Johnson appeared on The Marr Show on Sunday morning , to defend his government ’ s handling of the @ @ @ @ @ urged the public to “ behave fearlessly but with common sense ” , which seemed @ @ @ @ @ contradiction in terms .
Labour ’ s Chris Bryant and the Green Party ’ s @ @ @ @ @ many MPs baffled by the advice .
It wasn ’ t just the politicians shaking @ @ @ @ @ statistician for the Department of Health , Jon Hannah , had this very sound point @ @ @ @ @ said the public ’ s “ fraying discipline ” had increased Covid numbers – 9 @ @

News
Boris Johnson appeared on The Marr Show on Sunday morning, to defend his government’s handling of the coronavirus crisis.
He twice urged the public to “behave fearlessly but with common sense”, which seemed to be something of a contradiction in terms.
Labour’s Chris Bryant and the Green Party’s Caroline Lucas were two of many MPs baffled by the advice.
What on earth does this mean? Boris Johnson: "We want people to behave fearlessly but with common sense". This kind of incomprehensible two-faced messaging is part of why we’re in such a mess. He wants to sound bullish but just confuses everyone. — Chris Bryant (@RhonddaBryant) October 4, 2020
PM says people should act “fearlessly but with common sense” – phew, that clears it up then #Marr — Caroline Lucas (@CarolineLucas) October 4, 2020
It wasn’t just the politicians shaking their heads.
1.
Fearlessly but with common sense. pic.twitter.com/RZI9kO8CjI — Mr Quimbly (@RogerQuimbly) October 4, 2020
2.
Act fearlessly but with common sense. Go to work but don't go to work Support Man Utd but also Man City. Don't dream it, do it, but also don't do it. We have nothing to offer but blood, sweat and tears but also we have several other things.https://t.co/gW0pGZ2BjW — David Schneider (@davidschneider) October 4, 2020
3.
4.
Boris Johnson has told people to live “fearlessly” but with “common sense.”
Boris Johnson contracted coronavirus after boasting about shaking hands with everyone in a hospital treating patients with covid. — Larry the Cat (@Number10cat) October 4, 2020
5.
""act fearlessly but with common sense". WHAT ? Take your umbrella? But sit in a crowded pub? Climb Everest but wrap up warm? Smoke crack but take Vit D?? — suzanne moore (@suzanne_moore) October 4, 2020
6.
time to make a coffee fearlessly but with common sense — dave ❄ 🥕 🧻 (@davemacladd) October 4, 2020
7.
"We want people to behave fearlessly but with common sense" #BorisJohnson pic.twitter.com/rymjZqsTlx — Otto English (@Otto_English) October 4, 2020
8.
“Fearlessly but with common sense, yes – that’s what I said. Why is this so difficult to understand? Just get across the bloody road will you, son? Fucksake!” pic.twitter.com/vZ8o1kjXAG — Erroneous Monk (@consol8ion) October 4, 2020
9.
Fearlessly but with common sense is like saying ‘stylishly but while wearing red trousers’. https://t.co/CAid83QhMK — Tiernan Douieb (@TiernanDouieb) October 4, 2020
A former statistician for the Department of Health, Jon Hannah, had this very sound point to make.
To behave fearlessly during a pandemic is the sort of common sense that leads to a Darwin Award…. — Jon Hannah 🔸 #FBCoalition2024 (@JCHannah77) October 4, 2020
READ MORE
Boris Johnson said the public’s “fraying discipline” had increased Covid numbers – 9 alternative suggestions
Source YouTube Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-10-05--Laurence Fox is protesting Sainsbury’s telling racists to shop elsewhere by shopping elsewhere – 7 f

Laurence Fox is protesting Sainsbury’s telling racists to shop elsewhere by shopping elsewhere – 7 favourite reactions

Sainsbury ’ s marked Black History Month by confirming their support for a diverse society and workplace with this message @ @ @ @ @ “ racists not welcome ” , which seems like an uncontroversial standpoint , but it @ @ @ @ @ irritated a lot of people , who took such offence at Sainsbury ’ s suggestion @ @ @ @ @ don ’ t support diversity that they threatened to *checks notes* stay away .
One @ @ @ @ @ “ When is White History Month – or day ?
” and this response was @ @ @ @ @ gets .
There was also a great deal of support for Sainsbury ’ s , @ @ @ @ @ the attitude of the people complaining about the notice .
Unsurprisingly , the head of @ @ @ @ @ nationalist party , Laurence Fox , was one of the loudest objectors .
Finally , @ @ @ @ @ a hidden bonus .
The scourge of wokeness , Laurence Fox , is launching a @ @ @ @ @ funniest takedowns

Twitter
Sainsbury’s marked Black History Month by confirming their support for a diverse society and workplace with this message.
It boils down to “racists not welcome”, which seems like an uncontroversial standpoint, but it wasn’t.
It irritated a lot of people, who took such offence at Sainsbury’s suggestion to stay away if you don’t support diversity that they threatened to *checks notes* stay away.
One question kept cropping up – “When is White History Month – or day?” and this response was about as good as it gets.
This Sainsbury’s social media chap has a better grasp of reality than the best-paid columnists in the country. Kudos to Chris. pic.twitter.com/QFzQlhuICX — James O'Brien (@mrjamesob) October 4, 2020
There was also a great deal of support for Sainsbury’s, as well as scorn for the attitude of the people complaining about the notice.
Shop at Sainsbury’s if you don’t want to be around racists. https://t.co/IO93jkyAip — Shahmir Adnan Sanni (@shahmiruk) October 4, 2020
I can’t believe the reaction to this. Actually wait, I can. This country is full of racists who have decided Sainsbury’s have made up Black History Month and that trying to make Black colleagues feel as safe as possible is segregation. Ffs man. https://t.co/nC2khrgRRr — Rebekah May (@rrrebekahmay) October 3, 2020
“So you see, they won’t be able to object without outing themselves as bigots. Nobody wants to be seen as a bigot. It’s foolproof” pic.twitter.com/WXgk7VkZeZ — Ignacio Lopez (@comedylopez) October 4, 2020
Sainsbury: "We want racists to shop elsewhere"
Racists: "I will take my revenge by doing exactly what they want me to do!" #RightWhingers https://t.co/TretggNjPe — Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) October 3, 2020
Unsurprisingly, the head of the UK’s newest nationalist party, Laurence Fox, was one of the loudest objectors.
His announcement drew the reactions you’d expect.
1.
He was NEVER out of Sainsbury’s as well – what a clackwanker pic.twitter.com/J9xepHmhWK — Janey Godley (@JaneyGodley) October 4, 2020
2.
They specifically asked racists not to shop there. You can’t own somebody by following their exact instructions. pic.twitter.com/7d57hrnCn8 — James Felton (@JimMFelton) October 4, 2020
3.
4.
Dear @sainsburys — I will feel so much safer shopping in your stores now I know there’s no chance of bumping into Laurence Fox. Thank you. Yours, a loyal customer https://t.co/Y4OdFKrTew — Chris Hewitt (@ChrisHewitt) October 4, 2020
5.
It’s got to be a massive plus going into Sainsbury’s knowing there’s zero chance of bumping into failed actor/singer/politician Laurence Fox banging on about why women keep leaving him — Mo' (@mocent0) October 4, 2020
6.
So to recap. Laurence Fox now wants to cancel Sainsbury because they think racism isn’t brilliant. Ok then. Can’t wait to see the uniforms for his new *party* — Emma Kennedy (@EmmaKennedy) October 4, 2020
7.
Laurence Fox: this cancel culture is so, like, woke, yah. We must end it Also Laurence Fox: BOYCOTT SAINSBURY'S THEY DON'T WANT RACISTS SHOPPING THERE — The Leftwaffe ☭ 🚩 🇵🇸 (@Red_UnderTheBed) October 4, 2020
Finally, Lulu suggested there might be a hidden bonus.
To everyone refusing to shop in @sainsburys because Sainsbury's are celebrating #blackhistorymonthuk, I'm delighted. Shopping in Sainsbury's will be a much happier & safer experience without you particularly as you tend to be the idiots who refuse to wear masks. — Lulu (@Mmelulu) October 3, 2020
READ MORE
The scourge of wokeness, Laurence Fox, is launching a political party – the 9 funniest takedowns
Source Sainsbury’s Image Sainsbury’s, Screengrab


thepoke--2020-10-05--16,000 Covid test results got lost because the system uses Excel – 15 scathing takedowns

It recently emerged that almost 16,000 coronavirus test results had temporarily been lost due to a technical error .
What @ @ @ @ @ full data set was sent via a type of file with unlimited capacity , but @ @ @ @ @ into Excel , the programme ’ s limit of either 65,536 or 1,048,576 rows – @ @ @ @ @ any excess rows were lost .
No doubt there ’ ll be a full and @ @ @ @ @ an immediate improvement to the way the system is run .
Of course , it @ @ @ @ @ – gaffe just isn ’ t strong enough – for Twitter to ignore , so @ @ @ @ @ we spotted .

News
It recently emerged that almost 16,000 coronavirus test results had temporarily been lost due to a technical error.
What probably happened was that the full data set was sent via a type of file with unlimited capacity, but when the information was copied into Excel, the programme’s limit of either 65,536 or 1,048,576 rows – depending on the version – any excess rows were lost.
In this case, 15,841 test results effectively disappeared.
In the UK the number of cases rose rapidly.
But the public – and authorities – are only learning this now because these cases were only published now as a backlog. The reason was apparently that the database is managed in Excel and the number of columns had reached the maximum. pic.twitter.com/X4a8keSEHK — Max Roser (@MaxCRoser) October 5, 2020
“World beating.“
No doubt there’ll be a full and sincere apology, accompanied by an immediate improvement to the way the system is run.
via Gfycat
Of course, it was too huge a cock-up – gaffe just isn’t strong enough – for Twitter to ignore, so here are the best reactions we spotted.
1.
The 'world beating' Serco Test and Trace system is being run on Excel instead of database software – which has caused the latest issues. Next they'll tell us it's run on Windows 95 and they manually back it up on floppy disks each night. — Dr Rosena Allin-Khan (@DrRosena) October 5, 2020
2.
I don’t know where the government buys its software from, but I can get the latest version of Excel for less than £12 billion — Dr Phil Hammond (@drphilhammond) October 5, 2020
3.
excel waiting for that covid data: pic.twitter.com/phWEeKsLGs — Rob Holley (@robholley) October 5, 2020
4.
Trying to run the test and trace system using Excel like trying to do a Marvel movie's special FX in Microsoft Paint. — Sooz Kempner (@SoozUK) October 5, 2020
5.
Little way into Matt Hancock's statement on how 16,000 test results went missing because the Excel spreadsheet had too many columns. No mention yet of "Operation Moonshot." — Tom Peck (@tompeck) October 5, 2020
6.
actually amazed our world beating Test & Trace system is running on Excel when I assumed it was being done in crayon on a napkin — dave ❄ 🥕 🧻 (@davemacladd) October 5, 2020
7.
8.


thepoke--2020-10-05--This TV reporter had to remind this guy to wear a mask then wished she hadn’t

To the US , where this basketball fan had to be reminded to wear his face mask on live TV @ @ @ @ @ t turn out quite the way the reporter had expected .
The very definition of @ @ @ @ @ Wow , she couldn ’ t win in this scenario.
’ –Wigger– ‘ I love @ @ @ @ @ display it just for the reporter to panic and take it down lol.
’ hellollamasan @ @ @ @ @ went viral because , well , have a watch for yourself

Videos
To the US, where this basketball fan had to be reminded to wear his face mask on live TV. Except it didn’t turn out quite the way the reporter had expected.
The very definition of a no-win situation.
‘Wow, she couldn’t win in this scenario.’ –Wigger– ‘Funny. r/maliciouscompliance.’ dajur1 ‘I love how happy he was to display it just for the reporter to panic and take it down lol.’ hellollamasan
READ MORE
This video of baby giraffes went viral because, well, have a watch for yourself
Source Reddit u/A_Kind_Shark


thepoke--2020-10-05--This video of baby giraffes went viral because, well, have a watch for yourself

Over on Twitter @ thegallowboob went viral – wildly viral – with this video of baby giraffes .
He wasn @ @ @ @ @ expect and it turned out he wasn ’ t alone .
Except if you thought @ @ @ @ @ quite right , then you ’ d be right .
Obviously .
Spare a thought @ @ @ @ @ taken in by it .
It did look really good .
Here ’ s the @ @ @ @ @ we think it is .
Or maybe this is ?
And you can follow @ @ @ @ @ @ This cat getting ready to surprise this dog is simply brilliant

Videos
Over on Twitter @thegallowboob went viral – wildly viral – with this video of baby giraffes.
He wasn’t sure what to expect and it turned out he wasn’t alone.
had no idea baby giraffes looked exactly like miniature adult giraffes but not sure what i expected pic.twitter.com/aRAde6smI3 — Grave Rob N Roll (@thegallowboob) October 3, 2020
Except if you thought maybe something wasn’t quite right, then you’d be right. Obviously.
Okay you got me. It’s so well done. The CGI artist behind this is Vernon James Manlapaz. But still great seeing everyone think this is real lmao keep sharing it Check our more of his work here: https://t.co/DUAxTNtzhr pic.twitter.com/xGyJvgTZqQ — Grave Rob N Roll (@thegallowboob) October 3, 2020
Folk who got fooled: 98% Folk who posted baby giraffes: 1.8% Folk who commented “FAKE”: 0.2% HERE YOU GO MORE MINI RAFFS pic.twitter.com/na8FyJCY5l — Grave Rob N Roll (@thegallowboob) October 4, 2020
Spare a thought for the people who were taken in by it.
HE THOUGHT IT WAS A REAL VIDEO pic.twitter.com/uVmAH8TTVV — rudy betrayed (@rudy_betrayed) October 4, 2020
It did look really good.
the CGI is so well done that it looks *almost* real but is there a name for that part that’s not quite there? like these giraffes look so real but there’s something…off about them that tips folks off and I can’t describe what it is — vuestra merced (@GoodBitchery) October 3, 2020
It’s called the Uncanny Valley it’s a phenomena where the brain almost trusts what it’s seeing but there’s just something that makes it feel fake — 🙂 (@NolanHolmberg) October 4, 2020
Here’s the real thing. At least we think it is.
Even though the vid is clearly CG, Baby giraffes do indeed look like perfect miniatures of an adult giraffe!! ♡ pic.twitter.com/JK2bg1JYQb — Folchart (@FoIchart) October 3, 2020
Or maybe this is?
This is what baby giraffes actually look like, you can't fool me. pic.twitter.com/Z1uf0tdQYu — Snoodles (@SnoopyR6s) October 4, 2020
That shit looks quite frightening i’m not gonna lie — TRE STACKS (@StacksTre) October 4, 2020
And you can follow @thegallowboob on Twitter here.
Follow me if you want more stuff like this on your timeline (it's 100% real i promise) https://t.co/1i2g94gIFQ — Grave Rob N Roll (@thegallowboob) October 4, 2020
READ MORE
This cat getting ready to surprise this dog is simply brilliant
Source @thegallowboob @neverseentit


thepoke--2020-10-05--Beyoncé dancing to the Grange Hill theme tune is just brilliant

Beyoncé dancing to the Grange Hill theme tune is exactly the content we needed today .
It was posted on @ @ @ @ @ pandamoanimum and , well , have a watch for yourself .
Brilliant !
And just @ @ @ @ @ it was generating today … This cat discovering it has ears is a lovely , @ @

Videos
Beyoncé dancing to the Grange Hill theme tune is exactly the content we needed today.
It was posted on Twitter by the great @pandamoanimum and, well, have a watch for yourself.
Beyoncé dancing to the original Grange Hill theme tune. pic.twitter.com/A6r8fJPYzP — Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) October 5, 2020
Brilliant! And just a flavour of the love it was generating today …
Go on…indulge yerself….its Monday, you need a giggle. https://t.co/Av1AOUKRgH — Deborah Meaden (@DeborahMeaden) October 5, 2020
I love this far more than I should. https://t.co/ld2l4oCjxJ — Stephen McGann (@StephenMcGann) October 5, 2020
Follow @pandamoanimum on Twitter now!
READ MORE
This cat discovering it has ears is a lovely, funny watch
Source @Pandamoanimum


thepoke--2020-10-06--Donald Trump’s post-Covid rant makes a lot more sense as Liza Minnelli

You might have heard a bit of what Donald Trump had to say after checking out of hospital just a @ @ @ @ @ with Covid-19 .
But you haven ’ t heard it quite like this .
The @ @ @ @ @ as Trump , but delivered by comedian , actor , writer and singer Sooz Kempner @ @ @ @ @ – as Liza Minnelli .
Makes a whole lot more sense now .
And just @ @ @ @ @ , this was fabulous too .
A CNN correspondent just called Donald Trump ‘ Covita @ @ @ @ @ the perfect burn

Videos
You might have heard a bit of what Donald Trump had to say after checking out of hospital just a few days after being diagnosed with Covid-19.
But you haven’t heard it quite like this. The words are exactly the same as Trump, but delivered by comedian, actor, writer and singer Sooz Kempner – @SoozUK on Twitter – as Liza Minnelli.
Donald Trump's "home from hospital" Twitter video verbatim but instead of Donald Trump it's Liza Minnelli. pic.twitter.com/eRIev4QaQJ — Sooz Kempner (@SoozUK) October 6, 2020
Makes a whole lot more sense now.
And just in case you missed it, this was fabulous too.
Donald Trump's HBO Axios interview with @jonathanvswan absolutely verbatim but instead of Donald Trump it's Liza Minnelli. pic.twitter.com/PhPciBYcJH — Sooz Kempner (@SoozUK) August 4, 2020
And this!
Donald Trump's "sharks!" speech verbatim but instead of Donald Trump it's Liza Minnelli. pic.twitter.com/S9aQPnCesy — Sooz Kempner (@SoozUK) August 21, 2020
Follow @SoozUK on Twitter here!
READ MORE
A CNN correspondent just called Donald Trump ‘Covita’ and it’s the perfect burn
Source Twitter @SoozUK


thepoke--2020-10-06--Liam Gallagher’s NSFW takedown of Rishi Sunak went viral but a Mail reader wasn’t happy so he respon

Liam Gallagher’s NSFW takedown of Rishi Sunak went viral but a Mail reader wasn’t happy so he responded personally

Liam Gallagher ’ s not happy with the chancellor of the exchequer , Rishi Sunak .
Specifically he ’ s @ @ @ @ @ after he told ITV News that people ‘ in all walks of life ’ including @ @ @ @ @ consider retraining and changing their jobs because of the pandemic .
The government has come @ @ @ @ @ enough to support the arts in these difficult times and Sunak ’ s latest interview @ @ @ @ @ final straw for Gallagher .
And he wasn ’ t finished there .
Actually , @ @ @ @ @ there either , after he spotted a Mail Online reader who suggested he should mind @ @ @ @ @ might be our favourite bit .
Point made .
And we ’ re sure LRAQ @ @ @ @ @ touch .
This Liam Gallagher story about his night out with Steve Coogan has a @ @

Twitter
Liam Gallagher’s not happy with the chancellor of the exchequer, Rishi Sunak.
Specifically he’s not happy with the chancellor after he told ITV News that people ‘in all walks of life’ including the arts would have to consider retraining and changing their jobs because of the pandemic.
The government has come under fire for not doing enough to support the arts in these difficult times and Sunak’s latest interview appears to have been the final straw for Gallagher.
So the dopes in gov telling musicians and people in arts to retrain and get another job what and become massive cunts like you nah yer alright c’mon you know LG x — Liam Gallagher (@liamgallagher) October 6, 2020
This country would be beyond wank if it wasn’t for the arts and the music and football show a bit of respect you little TURD cmon you know LG x — Liam Gallagher (@liamgallagher) October 6, 2020
And he wasn’t finished there.
If anyone needs to retrain it’s them shower of CUNTZ c’mon you know LG x — Liam Gallagher (@liamgallagher) October 6, 2020
Actually, he wasn’t finished there either, after he spotted a Mail Online reader who suggested he should mind his language.
And this might be our favourite bit.
LRAQ commented on MailOnline: Eloquent and classy as always, Mr Gallagher! Does he not realise that the minute you resort to using bad… https://t.co/S0vn8aK2ne FUCK OFF — Liam Gallagher (@liamgallagher) October 6, 2020
Point made. And we’re sure LRAQ will have appreciated the personal touch.
READ MORE
This Liam Gallagher story about his night out with Steve Coogan has a lovely punchline
Source @liamgallagher Images screengrabs


thepoke--2020-10-06--How Thailand is coping with the pandemic is an amazing and utterly frustrating watch

This 8-second insight into how these local shops in Thailand are dealing with the pandemic is both an amazing and @ @ @ @ @ looks … world-beating , you might say .
The video went viral on Twitter and @ @ @ @ @ the things people were saying about it .
And just in case you were wondering @ @ @ @ @ here ’ s more from Niall who posted the original video .
Whoever put this @ @ @ @ @ take the rest of the week off

Videos
This 8-second insight into how these local shops in Thailand are dealing with the pandemic is both an amazing and utterly frustrating watch.
My local shops in Thailand. In 2 seconds scans my temperature and to see if wearing mask. Doors don’t open if not. 3 cases in 100+ days here. Removes awkward mask arguments for staff as well. pic.twitter.com/4Eac5fMsLR — Niall Harbison (@NiallHarbison) October 4, 2020
Almost looks … world-beating, you might say.
The video went viral on Twitter and here are just some of the things people were saying about it.
Could people please stop tweeting competence? It’s very upsetting https://t.co/GQsMVMMzJP — LucyMangan (@LucyMangan) October 5, 2020
That’s really brilliant 👍🏻but I’ve seen people walk into shops here with their masks on only to take them off or put them under their chin .. what happens then ?? Do you know? Are they asked to leave or put masks back on? — Loulabell #WearaMask (@lightnessalways) October 4, 2020
Really wouldn’t happen. Just seem to respect the rules. More of a cultural thing as well. Confrontation usually avoided — Niall Harbison (@NiallHarbison) October 4, 2020
Boy the US is stuck on Atari while everybody else has the PS5. https://t.co/GnQmFEodRp — Baé, LLC (@T_dot_Lee_PhD) October 5, 2020
Yes, yes, but I hear all those folks who are Constitutional Rights scholars these days saying we can’t have this Communist mind control thingy scan our images. — Constantin Gurdgiev (@GTCost) October 4, 2020
Never mind the super computer that accesses 10,000s data points with Zuckerberg at the wheel that we never have more than a metre from us 😂 — Niall Harbison (@NiallHarbison) October 4, 2020
Everything that's happening is happening not because we couldn't afford it, but because wealth refuses to pay. https://t.co/IJdJOlwPdF — A.R. Moxon—Preorder The Revisionaries In Paperback (@JuliusGoat) October 5, 2020
And just in case you were wondering about the numbers …
Thailand
Population: 69m
Covid-19 deaths: 59 UK population: 66m
Covid-19 deaths 42,350 I was in Thailand Jan to Apr, the difference in Covid-19 approach between Thailand and UK was staggering!
More checks to get into a Thai mall than to get into the UK. — Peter Knight 3.5%🇪🇺🇬🇧🏴 (@Pete_Knight_) October 5, 2020
USA: Hold my beer — Ry Dreier (@RyDreier) October 5, 2020
And here’s more from Niall who posted the original video.
Thailand (and many Asian countries) have lots of amazing solutions like this. Will share more on Instagram as well to show there is hope ahead. I'm here https://t.co/rwBscKD2Dy — Niall Harbison (@NiallHarbison) October 4, 2020
READ MORE
Whoever put this rail replacement sign here, take the rest of the week off
Source @NiallHarbison


thepoke--2020-10-06--Whoever put this rail replacement sign here, take the rest of the week off

Well , it ’ s one way of taking the edge off for people whose trains have been replaced by @ @ @ @ @ picture shared by @ FlywheelMedia1 over on Twitter .
In the beginning was the word @ @ @ @ @ Great Western Railways and the word was delays .
You can read a whole bunch @ @ @ @ @ This TV reporter had to remind this guy to wear a mask then wished she @ @ @

Pics
Well, it’s one way of taking the edge off for people whose trains have been replaced by a bus.
Love this picture shared by @FlywheelMedia1 over on Twitter.
In the beginning was the word and the word was with Great Western Railways and the word was delays.
You can read a whole bunch more funny/weird signs here.
READ MORE
This TV reporter had to remind this guy to wear a mask then wished she hadn’t
Source @FlywheelMedia1


thepoke--2020-10-06--A Republican senator shared a video of Trump ‘wrestling’ coronavirus and we don’t know where to star

A Republican senator shared a video of Trump ‘wrestling’ coronavirus and we don’t know where to start

Have to confess we hadn ’ t come across Kelly Loeffler before and chances are won ’ t do again @ @ @ @ @ Republican senator and US election candidate because she was attracting a lot of attention today @ @ @ @ @ of Donald Trump wrestling the coronavirus .
And we don ’ t know where to @ @ @ @ @ fair to say it didn ’ t go down entirely well with a lot of @ @ @ @ @ tone deaf all the way up to 11 .
Just in the interests of balance @ @ @ @ @ people liked it .
They really liked it .
And just in case you want @ @ @ @ @ … Donald Trump appeared on the White House balcony and everyone ’ s talking about @ @

Weird World
Have to confess we hadn’t come across Kelly Loeffler before and chances are won’t do again.
We only mention the Republican senator and US election candidate because she was attracting a lot of attention today after sharing a bizarre clip of Donald Trump wrestling the coronavirus.
And we don’t know where to start.
It’s fair to say it didn’t go down entirely well with a lot of people who thought it turned tone deaf all the way up to 11.
What a fun, cool way to imply that the 210,000 dead Americans were just too weak. — Kendall Brown (@kendallybrown) October 5, 2020
Are you fucking serious with this bullshit? The dude had two experimental treatments, a hospital suite, 15 doctors and three days of supplemental oxygen. He didn’t mud wrestle the thing. For fucks sake. — feminist next door (@emrazz) October 5, 2020
Attila, this is pathetic, even for you — Parker Molloy (@ParkerMolloy) October 5, 2020
Over 7000 of your constituents have died. — Pé (@4everNeverTrump) October 5, 2020
29 days to end this madness but thing is for certain, It will get dumber than this. — Chidi® (@ChidiNwatu) October 5, 2020
In other words, Kelly Loeffler believes that the 210,000 Americans who died were just weak. — Brian Tyler Cohen (@briantylercohen) October 5, 2020
Just in the interests of balance and all that, some people liked it. They really liked it.
President Donald Trump, his excellent medical team, and God (as always) are all heroes for defeating the evil coronavirus! 👍❤🦅🙏🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈 — Robert Stemmons (@whistledaddy) October 5, 2020
To conclude …
This is going to end so badly. — The Hoarse Whisperer (@TheRealHoarse) October 5, 2020
p.s. wrestling is fake, ma’am. Trump didn’t beat that guy either. — The Hoarse Whisperer (@TheRealHoarse) October 5, 2020
And just in case you want to see the original clip …
READ MORE
Donald Trump appeared on the White House balcony and everyone’s talking about his breathing
Source @KLoeffler H/T Indy100


thepoke--2020-10-06--A CNN correspondent just called Donald Trump ‘Covita’ and it’s the perfect burn

You ’ ll no doubt have seen the footage of Donald Trump emerging onto a White House balcony and taking @ @ @ @ @ was an extraordinary moment and it reminded people , including the great @ SoozUK , @ @ @ @ @ got even better when Patti Lupone , who played Eva Perón in the 1979 Broadway @ @ @ @ @ involved .
But our very favourite bit might be this , the moment when CNN @ @ @ @ @ correspondent Jim Acosta said this .
A far-right Trump supporter said the president just had @ @ @ @ @ and wins self-own of the week

Videos
You’ll no doubt have seen the footage of Donald Trump emerging onto a White House balcony and taking his mask off.
It was an extraordinary moment and it reminded people, including the great @SoozUK, of this.
Congratulations to Madonna who is no longer the shittest Evita. pic.twitter.com/woWnM8Lb2p — Sooz Kempner (@SoozUK) October 6, 2020
And it got even better when Patti Lupone, who played Eva Perón in the 1979 Broadway version of Evita, got involved.
I still have the lung power and I wore less makeup. This revival is closing November 3rd. pic.twitter.com/vRQ4LepACv — Patti LuPone (@PattiLuPone) October 6, 2020
But our very favourite bit might be this, the moment when CNN’s chief White House correspondent Jim Acosta said this.
Boom.
A CNN corespondent just called Trump “Covita” referring to his balcony photo op… I’m dying pic.twitter.com/FrbfGIpxDy — Stone (@stonecold2050) October 6, 2020
Don't cry for me Covita… https://t.co/FJ1uyTfCVQ — John Sweeney (@johnsweeneyroar) October 6, 2020
https://twitter.com/apj813/status/1313301791698632705?s=20
Don’t cry for me maskless MAGAs
The truth is I’m still infectious
I’m high on steroids
That’s why I’m tweeting
In all caps nonsense
Don’t keep your distance https://t.co/VafOe59HUn — Sarah Mackey (@sarahjanet) October 6, 2020
I really wish I said that. https://t.co/v7XCIN0ZFh — Philip Drucker (@DruckerPhilip) October 6, 2020
READ MORE
A far-right Trump supporter said the president just had his ‘Mussolini moment’ and wins self-own of the week
Source @kathyjeung


thepoke--2020-10-06--Test and Trace, quarantine and panic buying – the 14 funniest coronavirus posts

The Test and Trace system hasn ’ t had a good week , which seems fair seeing as the rest @ @ @ @ @ either .
After failing badly due to being partly run on MS Excel , it @ @ @ @ @ would keep coming – alongside the ones about panic buying , losing your sense of @ @ @ @ @ Here are our current favourite coronavirus posts .

Twitter
The Test and Trace system hasn’t had a good week, which seems fair seeing as the rest of us haven’t either.
After failing badly due to being partly run on MS Excel, it was inevitable that the jokes would keep coming – alongside the ones about panic buying, losing your sense of smell and much more.
Here are our current favourite coronavirus posts.
1.
The government have said they'll stop using Excel 2003 to store COVID case numbers From now on a tally will be kept on Matt Hancock's sweaty palm — Parker (@panoparker) October 6, 2020
2.
Great. Panic buying has started again. Supermarket was low on toilet paper, pasta and cat food! What am I supposed to load my cat traps with now? — Ignacio Lopez (@comedylopez) September 30, 2020
3.
Looking forward to Halloween this year. Kids going knocking on doors, asking, Track or Trace? — Mark Hurst (@HurstAKA) October 5, 2020
4.
I hate covid because now people stare when I lick door handles — tom (@pilau) September 27, 2020
5.
You can only access the world-beating track and trace system by typing LOAD “” into a ZX Spectrum. — Jason (@NickMotown) October 5, 2020
6.
Can’t Smell or Taste The Difference https://t.co/B0YKOmc8Li — Matt Chorley (@MattChorley) September 29, 2020
7.


thepoke--2020-10-06--Donald Trump appeared on the White House balcony and everyone’s talking about his breathing

Just a few days after testing positive for coronavirus , Donald Trump is out of hospital and back in business @ @ @ @ @ s back in the White House , at least , standing on a balcony without @ @ @ @ @ the world how he ’ s doing .
And lots of people focused on his @ @ @ @ @ watch .
Presumably no-one should be surprised , seeing as it ’ s only a @ @ @ @ @ positive for coronavirus , although here ’ s Trump telling everyone he hasn ’ t @ @ @ @ @ years .
Here are just some of the many , many things people were saying @ @ @ @ @ Trump supporter said the president just had his ‘ Mussolini moment ’ – 6 crushing @

Twitter
Just a few days after testing positive for coronavirus, Donald Trump is out of hospital and back in business.
Well, he’s back in the White House, at least, standing on a balcony without his mask on to show the world how he’s doing. And lots of people focused on his breathing because, well, watch.
Trump looks like he is gasping for air pic.twitter.com/4k2v4Jxlir — Brennan Murphy (@brenonade) October 5, 2020
Trump appears to be wincing in pain while he breathes pic.twitter.com/YKhGhu0VN0 — Brennan Murphy (@brenonade) October 5, 2020
Presumably no-one should be surprised, seeing as it’s only a few days since he tested positive for coronavirus, although here’s Trump telling everyone he hasn’t felt this good for 20 years.
I will be leaving the great Walter Reed Medical Center today at 6:30 P.M. Feeling really good! Don’t be afraid of Covid. Don’t let it dominate your life. We have developed, under the Trump Administration, some really great drugs & knowledge. I feel better than I did 20 years ago! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) October 5, 2020
Here are just some of the many, many things people were saying about it.
1.
Trump climbs a few steps to the White House, takes off his mask and then is visibly gasping and having diffulty breathing while he tries to wave and pretend everything is fine. pic.twitter.com/VXxSh1BNuO — Amee Vanderpool (@girlsreallyrule) October 6, 2020
2.
I watched the video of Trump on the balcony. Here is what I saw: -Extra-respiratory muscles to breathe.
-Visible chest wall rise.
-Open mouth breathing at times.
-Rapid shallow breaths at roughly 25-30 breaths per minute. More than twice normal. This is respiratory distress. — JaneDoeMD (@Caerage) October 6, 2020
3.
You're watching idiocy collapse in on itself. https://t.co/XaRM7PMUQ8 — Ian Dunt (@IanDunt) October 6, 2020
4.
I say this earnestly. He looks like he is having severe trouble breathing. He is not well. And he is endangering the lives of others. Again. This is a huge miscalculation by Trump and this could end very badly. https://t.co/JjvwVvsI0Y — Brett Meiselas (@BMeiselas) October 5, 2020
5.
Trump standing on a balcony for a photo-op with a contagious disease that's killed 210,000 people, gasping for breath, is so banana republic I can't believe what I'm seeing. — digby (@digby56) October 5, 2020
6.
Just watched Trump hospital video a second time. His breathing is clearly labored. He seems to be leaning on table for support. And there’s so much fear in his eyes. — Gabriel Sherman (@gabrielsherman) October 3, 2020
7.
8.
Trump looks like a goldfish that fell out of the fishbowl onto the floor, gasping for breath. pic.twitter.com/aO2GS79ZiL — Jon Cooper (@joncoopertweets) October 5, 2020
9.
That is not a well man pic.twitter.com/XWgQiaSvjh — Owen Jones (@OwenJones84) October 5, 2020
10.
Telling all the girls at school you’re going to dive off the top board before climbing back down the ladder. pic.twitter.com/ZOh0CS7Kto — Tokyo Sexwhale (@tokyosexwhale) October 6, 2020
11.
this is one of the weirdest clips I’ve ever seen pic.twitter.com/lEYiRIdwDV — Hannah Jane Parkinson (@ladyhaja) October 6, 2020
12.
People on social media bellowing HE'S GOT IT like they're Bananarama doing Venus. — David Quantick (@quantick) October 6, 2020
13.
Just stay in the hospital, you weird man. https://t.co/LLu39Mvjgk — John Rain (@MrKenShabby) October 5, 2020
READ MORE
A far-right Trump supporter said the president just had his ‘Mussolini moment’ – 6 crushing takedowns
Source @brenonade


thepoke--2020-10-06--15 funny and clever signs that will make people take notice

There are so many signs , posters and notices all around us , that it takes a lot to stand @ @ @ @ @ over at someecards have been looking out for ones that do just that .
We @ @ @ @ @ their best picks , plus a few more from r/FunnySigns .
We hope you enjoy @ @ @ @ @ went there !
6 .
The pool ’ s full enough , thanks

Pics
There are so many signs, posters and notices all around us, that it takes a lot to stand out. The lovely lot over at someecards have been looking out for ones that do just that.
We’ve saved some of their best picks, plus a few more from r/FunnySigns. We hope you enjoy them.
1. Top tip
Via
2. Sorry, smokers
Via
3. Seems fair
Via
4. They went there!
Via
5. Clever
Via
6. The pool’s full enough, thanks
Via
7. Very relatable
Via
8. Teacher knows best
Via


thepoke--2020-10-06--A far-right Trump supporter said the president just had his ‘Mussolini moment’ and wins self-own of

A far-right Trump supporter said the president just had his ‘Mussolini moment’ and wins self-own of the week

As you ’ ll probably have seen by now , Donald Trump has taken to the White House balcony to @ @ @ @ @ he ’ s doing despite testing positive for coronavirus just a few days ago .
@ @ @ @ @ of course , including far-right political commentator Nick Fuentes , who hosts the America First @ @ @ @ @ .
Here ’ s what he had to say .
And here are our favourite @ @ @ @ @ .
11 stinging responses to Trump downplaying the coronavirus – again

Twitter
As you’ll probably have seen by now, Donald Trump has taken to the White House balcony to show everyone just how well he’s doing despite testing positive for coronavirus just a few days ago.
His supporters were delighted, of course, including far-right political commentator Nick Fuentes, who hosts the America First podcast among many other things.
Here’s what he had to say.
And here are our favourite things people said in response.
Who wants to tell Nicholas? https://t.co/x5RwTOwdRq — Julia Ioffe (@juliaioffe) October 6, 2020
buddy you will never believe what happened to Mussolini in the end https://t.co/SzeCXEScef — number one yoga dad (@HalpernAlex) October 6, 2020
Mussolini moment? Trump’s been shot in an alley, corpse thrown into the back of a van, driven to Milan, hung upside down in a petrol station and stoned? https://t.co/8bo2vBSZus — Stephen Mangan (@StephenMangan) October 6, 2020
I'm not sure what's more wrong about this tweet. The fact he's trying to make glowing parallels between Trump and a fascist dictator, or that he doesn't know Mussolini ended up hanging dead by his feet from a lamppost. https://t.co/1ZV7xiMwgO — Patrick S. Tomlinson (@stealthygeek) October 6, 2020
What precisely is s Mussolini Moment? The first one that springs to my mind involves a lamppost pic.twitter.com/ulkAZwKy0o — . (@twlldun) October 6, 2020
Remember to read to the end of your Big Book of World War II before you tweet pic.twitter.com/LL8q9Q0d1L — James Felton (@JimMFelton) October 6, 2020
To conclude …
"Hello, Self-Own Hall of Fame? You're gonna want to see this." https://t.co/pww1M98idj — Dan Cronin (@croninwhocares) October 6, 2020
READ MORE
11 stinging responses to Trump downplaying the coronavirus – again


thepoke--2020-10-06--Mick Fleetwood recreating a viral TikTok lip-synching to Fleetwood Mac is what the internet is for

A TikTok by skateboarder Nathan Apodaca , a.k.a .
@ 420DoggFace208 recently went viral after everybody appreciated the way he @ @ @ @ @ of juice as he coasted on his board , lip-synching to Fleetwood Mac ’ s @ @ @ @ @ , in case you didn ’ t see it .
In one of those “ @ @ @ @ @ is for ” moments , the great Mick Fleetwood , founding member and drummer of @ @ @ @ @ and did this : We couldn ’ t end without sharing a reaction from the @ @ @ @ @ .
This guy chilling to Fleetwood Mac has gone viral because he ’ s giving @ @ @

Videos
A TikTok by skateboarder Nathan Apodaca, a.k.a. @420DoggFace208 recently went viral after everybody appreciated the way he was chilling with a bottle of juice as he coasted on his board, lip-synching to Fleetwood Mac’s Dreams.
Here it is, in case you didn’t see it.
In one of those “this is what the internet is for” moments, the great Mick Fleetwood, founding member and drummer of Fleetwood Mac, joined TikTok and did this:
The internet lost its mind – understandably.
Mick Fleetwood just joined TikTok and recreated @420doggface208’s incredibly viral video longboarding while sipping cran juice that put Fleetwood Mac’s “Dreams” back on the top of the charts https://t.co/qZKWshiJhf pic.twitter.com/J5XaBps9oN — Home Depot Skeleton (@TaylorLorenz) October 4, 2020
Timeline cleanser. I can’t get enough. Here’s Mick Fleetwood recreating the "Dreams" viral vid… pic.twitter.com/nJuSAOVqMA — Rex Chapman🏇🏼 (@RexChapman) October 4, 2020
not enough being said about Mick Fleetwood joining TikTok for this pic.twitter.com/5ZESy3rvOn — Madeleine (@kohlgrrl) October 5, 2020
Time to switch up the vibe on the feed for a minute…here is Mick Fleetwood recreating the "Dreams" video 🤣 pic.twitter.com/u23vddD1ET — Icculus The Brave (@FirenzeMike) October 4, 2020
*runs to the town centre, climbs the bell tower, and begins frantically ringing the bell while screaming* MICK FLEETWOOD HAS MADE A TIKTOK OF HIMSELF LIP SYNCING DREAMS WHILE SKATEBOARDING AND DRINKING CRANBERRY JUICE pic.twitter.com/kbnwNNt9Wu — Jess McGuire (@jessmcguire) October 4, 2020
We couldn’t end without sharing a reaction from the man who started it all.
Blessed indeed.
READ MORE
This guy chilling to Fleetwood Mac has gone viral because he’s giving us life goals
Source Mick Fleetwood Image Screengrab, Screengrab


thepoke--2020-10-06--People are stumped at Ian Botham becoming a peer – the only 5 funny reactions you need

Former England cricketer , Ian Botham , made an appearance at a very different Lords , when he took his @ @ @ @ @ the realm on Monday , with all the pomp and ceremony that entails .
He @ @ @ @ @ of Ravensworth , if you care about that kind of thing .
He was given @ @ @ @ @ for his loyalty to Brexit , along with several other Eurosceptic figures .
The sportsman @ @ @ @ @ the general population for his on-the-pitch skills , but on Twitter , he ’ s @ @ @ @ @ silly mid off – by which we mean an accidental dick pic , which we @ @ @ @ @ of consideration for you .
The incident definitely coloured the reactions to the news .
@ @ @ @ @ Black mused on the randomness of the peerage system .
Ian Botham goes full ‘ @ @ @ @ @ Live interview about giving pheasants to food banks

News
Former England cricketer, Ian Botham, made an appearance at a very different Lords, when he took his seat as a peer of the realm on Monday, with all the pomp and ceremony that entails.
He took the title Baron Botham of Ravensworth, if you care about that kind of thing.
Ian Botham, former England all-rounder, is being introduced as a member of the House of Lords. pic.twitter.com/xxda6R8zRs — BBC Parliament (@BBCParliament) October 5, 2020
He was given the position as a reward for his loyalty to Brexit, along with several other Eurosceptic figures.
The sportsman may well be best-known in the general population for his on-the-pitch skills, but on Twitter, he’s more notorious for showing his silly mid off – by which we mean an accidental dick pic, which we won’t share out of consideration for you.
The incident definitely coloured the reactions to the news.
1.
A little bit of history there as Ian Botham becomes, to the very best of my knowledge, the first member of the House of Lords to have accidentally tweeted a picture of their own cock. https://t.co/NKhMrmnlqd — Tom Peck (@tompeck) October 5, 2020
2.
The future of government policy on swing bowling is assured.
One less worry to keep us awake at night. https://t.co/s5SMa6gyjP — Peter Smith (@Redpeter99) October 5, 2020
3.
Not sure the topknot suits him https://t.co/FEK7tfWJej — Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) October 5, 2020
4.
Brexiteers: "I believe in Brexit, to get rid of unelected bureaucrats". Also Brexiteers: I stan Ian Botham being in the House of Lords. pic.twitter.com/vxbcCS0SKH — Rick O'Shea (@RickOShea321) October 5, 2020
5.
Ian Botham: a member we never expected to see https://t.co/t2u6v4KUHR — Tom Williams (@tomwfootball) October 5, 2020
In conclusion, writer Will Black mused on the randomness of the peerage system.
We used to laugh at the ridiculousness of how impulsive nutters from battle became Lords, whose sons, grandsons etc became Lords. But now we have one who was once good at swinging a lump of wood as a ball came near him. What else has Ian Botham ever done well? pic.twitter.com/sgRAulLszN — Will Black (@WillBlackWriter) October 5, 2020
We’re stumped.
READ MORE
Ian Botham goes full ‘accidental Partridge’ with 5 Live interview about giving pheasants to food banks
Source BBC Parliament Image Screengrab


thepoke--2020-10-06--Munya Chawawa had the most savage takedown  of Pure Gym’s outrageous slavery workout

On Monday , the Luton branch of Pure Gym posted details of a workout named ’ 12 Years a Slave @ @ @ @ @ of the many outraged reactions .
The fact that the Personal Trainer who posted it @ @ @ @ @ was no mitigation , and they later issued this apology .
However , the best @ @ @ @ @ Munya Chawawa , who “ redressed the balance ” with this devastatingly sardonic parade of @ @ @ @ @ as blown away as ever by his swift response .
We don ’ t know @ @ @ @ @ to be said before it happens , but … 4 postboxes have been painted black @ @ @ @ @ Munya Chawawa imagined how that came about

Videos
On Monday, the Luton branch of Pure Gym posted details of a workout named ’12 Years a Slave’.
Here are some of the many outraged reactions.
Jesus ******* ****
Pure Gym Luton & Dunstable saw all these businesses showing solidarity with the black community and thought: Why not name a workout "12 years of slave" and use the slogan: "Slavery was hard and so is this"?
😅W😅O😅W😅 pic.twitter.com/ME5y32eCET — Femi (@Femi_Sorry) October 5, 2020
😮PureGym just posted a "12 Years A Slave" inspired training routine and said… "Slavery was hard, and so is this!" How the f*ck did they think that was ok?! Utterly Atrocious. Words fail me. pic.twitter.com/ocO3DDDimO — Vin Gill (@digitalvingill) October 5, 2020
The fact that the Personal Trainer who posted it turned out to be black was no mitigation, and they later issued this apology.
Disgusting an apology is not enough @PureGym – maybe a donation to charity & sacking the person who signed off on the campaign? https://t.co/foYn7NlBcw — Kristy Alisa (@KristyAlisa) October 5, 2020
…and my #marketingfail of the week goes to 👉 https://t.co/BUUlcE2VqA — Bec Baker (@MarketerBean) October 5, 2020
However, the best response came from satirical comedian Munya Chawawa, who “redressed the balance” with this devastatingly sardonic parade of black stereotypes.
Pure Gym announce their new Black History Month facilities. 🏋🏽♂🥴@Puregym_Luton pic.twitter.com/9UP636T8H7 — Munya Chawawa (@munyachawawa) October 5, 2020
Tweeters were as blown away as ever by his swift response.
The ink on Pure Gym’s apology isn’t even dry yet 😩 https://t.co/2r0kK5CUlG — Dionne Grant (@DionneGrant) October 5, 2020
He never misses https://t.co/DTambCK7q4 — Bolu Babalola (@BeeBabs) October 5, 2020
One of the consistently funny guys on here https://t.co/XM1mRdVuWZ — Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) October 5, 2020
We don’t know how many times it has to be said before it happens, but …
Give this man a TV show right now!!! https://t.co/hSjkRVdVpE pic.twitter.com/AV0iT41Vqf — Mo Gilligan (@MoTheComedian) October 5, 2020
READ MORE
4 postboxes have been painted black for Black History Month – Munya Chawawa imagined how that came about
Source Munya Chawawa Image Munya Chawawa