mercurynews--2020-05-04--Ask Amy: My neighbor shamed me for what I was doing in my own yard

DEAR AMY : I live in a suburban area with large homes and large lots between them .
Now that spring is here , I am spending as much time as possible outside , gardening .
Gardening is my passion — I spend much of the winter planning out my garden beds and combing through seed catalogs .
The other day one of my neighbors called me and ( more or less ) chewed me out for violating the area ’ s “ shelter in place ” order .
Honestly , I was so shocked , I didn ’ t @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ’ m wondering if I have somehow done something wrong .
Can you weigh in ?
• Ask Amy : I was scared by what I overheard when I called my elderly aunt • Ask Amy : This picky eater thinks she ’ s being polite , but it annoys me • Ask Amy : Dejected teen gets only cold advice from beloved relative • Ask Amy : This other woman stepped in before I was done with my husband • Ask Amy : The man-boys are running wild in my house , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ DEAR GARDENER : Grow in peace , my friend .
Digging in the earth on your own plot , while maintaining a healthy distance from others , does not expose you — or anyone else — to the coronavirus .
Furthermore , if you expand your efforts to put in a few extra rows of vegetables , you will have healthy food to eat and to share come harvest time .
DEAR AMY : I have a boy problem !
Ugh , I don ’ t think I ’ ve said that since @ @ @ @ @ @ @ now and until I met “ him ” just three months ago , I had pretty much decided I would be single forever .
I was fine with that .
Then he came along .
It was instant attraction for both of us .
He approached me , and we were immediately smitten .
We exchanged numbers and texted nonstop for two days until we were both available for a “ proper date.
” It was one of those great first dates .
Remember those ?
We closed down the restaurant .
We @ @ @ @ @ @ @ current events to where we see ourselves in five years .
The next night , I met his 9-year-old daughter , and a couple of weeks later , I met his best friend and her husband .
We were officially a couple and making big plans .
You couldn ’ t keep us apart .
Then he got distant .
He asked me to be patient with him because he was falling fast , and he was scared .
I didn ’ t hear from him for about a week , then got @ @ @ @ @ @ @ text in the middle of the day .
I responded , then nothing again .
Radio silence .
That was a few weeks ago and now he ’ s back , acting like nothing is wrong .
I want to ask him about it .
I want to know where we are , but I don ’ t want to scare him .
I truly believe that he cares about me and that he does want this as much as I do .
Help !
DEAR S : Passionate velocity often crashes into @ @ @ @ @ @ @ equal force .
What happens next , however , will help to set the stage for the rest of your relationship .
He ( and you ) made a rookie mistake by bringing his young daughter into the mix .
Meeting the child of a single parent is something you should do maybe at the three-month mark — not the day after your dream date .
Yes , he was moving too fast .
You were , too .
His actions , and his absence , should now be the subject of a @ @ @ @ @ @ @ someone who cuts and runs when he is stressed , confused , scared , or unsure ?
Was he in another relationship that he was exiting from during his distant time from you ?
Did his daughter freak out at the idea of him seriously dating ?
Can he talk endlessly about work and current events , but not describe his own feelings in any detail ?
You will find out .
If you are really into this guy ( you obviously are ) , you should be courageous enough to describe your @ @ @ @ @ @ @ whatever questions you want to ask , without the fear of scaring him off .
If a calm and forthright conversation about your budding relationship frightens him , then maybe he is not ( currently ) available to you .
Understand that this single parent is already in an important relationship — with his child .
DEAR AMY : Responding to the current COVID crisis , I ’ d like to share the following observation : I think people are becoming “ more so.
” If they were kind and thoughtful and inclined @ @ @ @ @ @ @ are more so .
They are finding ways to help , and finding those who need help , whether it is through sharing their time , money , or kindness .
And those of us who were angry and scared and suspicious before , sadly , are now “ more so.
” DEAR LARRY : This is astute .
I ’ m going to carry your wisdom with me for a long time .
You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy @ amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy , P.O .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
You can also follow her on Twitter @ askingamy or Facebook .

DEAR AMY: I live in a suburban area with large homes and large lots between them.
Now that spring is here, I am spending as much time as possible outside, gardening. Gardening is my passion — I spend much of the winter planning out my garden beds and combing through seed catalogs.
The other day one of my neighbors called me and (more or less) chewed me out for violating the area’s “shelter in place” order.
Honestly, I was so shocked, I didn’t know how to respond. Now I’m wondering if I have somehow done something wrong.
Can you weigh in?
Growing Gardener
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Digging in the earth on your own plot, while maintaining a healthy distance from others, does not expose you — or anyone else — to the coronavirus. Furthermore, if you expand your efforts to put in a few extra rows of vegetables, you will have healthy food to eat and to share come harvest time.
DEAR AMY: I have a boy problem! Ugh, I don’t think I’ve said that since my late 20s.
I am 40 now and until I met “him” just three months ago, I had pretty much decided I would be single forever. I was fine with that.
Then he came along. It was instant attraction for both of us. He approached me, and we were immediately smitten.
We exchanged numbers and texted nonstop for two days until we were both available for a “proper date.” It was one of those great first dates. Remember those? We closed down the restaurant. We talked about everything, from work to current events to where we see ourselves in five years.
The next night, I met his 9-year-old daughter, and a couple of weeks later, I met his best friend and her husband.
We were officially a couple and making big plans. You couldn’t keep us apart. Then he got distant. He asked me to be patient with him because he was falling fast, and he was scared. I didn’t hear from him for about a week, then got a random “how are you” text in the middle of the day. I responded, then nothing again. Radio silence.
That was a few weeks ago and now he’s back, acting like nothing is wrong. I want to ask him about it. I want to know where we are, but I don’t want to scare him.
I truly believe that he cares about me and that he does want this as much as I do. Help!
S
DEAR S: Passionate velocity often crashes into a sort of nascent relationship terror with equal force. What happens next, however, will help to set the stage for the rest of your relationship.
He (and you) made a rookie mistake by bringing his young daughter into the mix. Meeting the child of a single parent is something you should do maybe at the three-month mark — not the day after your dream date. Yes, he was moving too fast. You were, too.
His actions, and his absence, should now be the subject of a deep and honest conversation. Is he someone who cuts and runs when he is stressed, confused, scared, or unsure? Was he in another relationship that he was exiting from during his distant time from you? Did his daughter freak out at the idea of him seriously dating? Can he talk endlessly about work and current events, but not describe his own feelings in any detail? You will find out.
If you are really into this guy (you obviously are), you should be courageous enough to describe your own feelings and concerns, and ask whatever questions you want to ask, without the fear of scaring him off. If a calm and forthright conversation about your budding relationship frightens him, then maybe he is not (currently) available to you. Understand that this single parent is already in an important relationship — with his child.
Want Ask Amy delivered to your inbox for free on weekdays?
DEAR AMY: Responding to the current COVID crisis, I’d like to share the following observation: I think people are becoming “more so.” If they were kind and thoughtful and inclined to be loving before, now they are more so. They are finding ways to help, and finding those who need help, whether it is through sharing their time, money, or kindness.
And those of us who were angry and scared and suspicious before, sadly, are now “more so.”
Larry
DEAR LARRY: This is astute. I’m going to carry your wisdom with me for a long time.
You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.


mercurynews--2020-05-04--Harriette Cole: I love her, but she’s so mean to me

DEAR HARRIETTE : I have a friend who is extremely pushy .
Whenever we talk , it feels like it is on her terms and only when it is convenient for her .
And she always seems to find something to criticize me about .
Just some little thing that she finds annoying enough to want to get off her chest .
As my son says , she is judgmental .
I ’ m sick of it .
I feel like I can never relax when I talk to her ; I never know when she is going to say @ @ @ @ @ @ @ I don ’ t think she realizes how harsh her comments can be .
Even when I stand up for myself , I find that she deflects and throws more punches .
How can I get her to be more sensitive to my feelings ?
She is my friend , and I love her .
But I ’ ve had enough of her meanness .
DEAR BELOW THE BELT : It is time for you to stand up for yourself with this friend .
Do not allow her pushiness to silence you .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ be treated with greater care .
But you have to tell her .
You should not assume that she is aware of how her barbs land .
Chances are , she thinks the way she communicates is just the way she is , without considering that her “ way ” may be abrasive and hurtful to others .
Be prepared to tell her that her words hurt and to give her specific examples so that she can not wriggle out of the conversation .
Stop her when she deflects .
Tell her — @ @ @ @ @ @ @ that she hurts your feelings regularly .
Ask her to be more sensitive to you .
Remind her each time she says something inappropriate .
If she refuses to be more mindful , begin to distance yourself from her .
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• Harriette Cole @ @ @ @ @ @ @ strict lockdown • Harriette Cole : I ’ m no better off than these beggars DEAR HARRIETTE : My mother lives in a retirement home , and I am so worried about her .
There have been reports all over the country about the virus infiltrating old folks ’ homes and killing lots of people .
I feel like I should bring my mother home with me , but I ’ m worried that she might not stay healthy .
My husband goes to work outside of the home every day .
He @ @ @ @ @ @ @ he can , but he ’ s a contractor , and he works with people .
My mother is in her 90s and in fragile health .
That ’ s why I want her out of the retirement building , but I ’ m not sure that my house is safer .
How can I figure that out ?
DEAR MOM ’ S SAFETY : This is one of the most frequently asked questions today .
For anyone who has a parent or loved one living in a nursing home , the worry @ @ @ @ @ @ @ even after all of the precautions have been put in place .
As you know , the level of quarantine in those spaces is high .
Nobody can visit for the foreseeable future to avoid exposure .
And yet there are stories of nursing homes having deadly COVID-19 outbreaks .
Talk to your mother ’ s doctor .
Lay out your concerns and detail how your household runs .
Chances are slim that the doctor will want you to move your mother there , given the way that your husband interacts with people @ @ @ @ @ @ @ doctor .
For AARP recommendations on how to support your mother , go to bit.ly/3bAstpW .
Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS , an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams .
You can send questions to askharriette @ harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication , 1130 Walnut St. , Kansas City , MO 64106 .

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a friend who is extremely pushy. Whenever we talk, it feels like it is on her terms and only when it is convenient for her. And she always seems to find something to criticize me about. Just some little thing that she finds annoying enough to want to get off her chest. As my son says, she is judgmental.
I’m sick of it. I feel like I can never relax when I talk to her; I never know when she is going to say something that will hurt my feelings. I don’t think she realizes how harsh her comments can be. Even when I stand up for myself, I find that she deflects and throws more punches.
How can I get her to be more sensitive to my feelings? She is my friend, and I love her. But I’ve had enough of her meanness.
Below the Belt
DEAR BELOW THE BELT: It is time for you to stand up for yourself with this friend. Do not allow her pushiness to silence you. As her friend, you deserve to be treated with greater care. But you have to tell her. You should not assume that she is aware of how her barbs land. Chances are, she thinks the way she communicates is just the way she is, without considering that her “way” may be abrasive and hurtful to others.
Be prepared to tell her that her words hurt and to give her specific examples so that she cannot wriggle out of the conversation. Stop her when she deflects. Tell her — and punctuate your point with anecdotes — that she hurts your feelings regularly. Ask her to be more sensitive to you. Remind her each time she says something inappropriate. If she refuses to be more mindful, begin to distance yourself from her.
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Harriette Cole: I’m ashamed to tell people I forgave my childhood friend Advice | Harriette Cole: I’ve worked hard, and my poor siblings resent my success DEAR HARRIETTE: My mother lives in a retirement home, and I am so worried about her. There have been reports all over the country about the virus infiltrating old folks’ homes and killing lots of people.
I feel like I should bring my mother home with me, but I’m worried that she might not stay healthy. My husband goes to work outside of the home every day. He practices social distancing to the extent that he can, but he’s a contractor, and he works with people.
My mother is in her 90s and in fragile health. That’s why I want her out of the retirement building, but I’m not sure that my house is safer. How can I figure that out?
Mom’s Safety
DEAR MOM’S SAFETY: This is one of the most frequently asked questions today. For anyone who has a parent or loved one living in a nursing home, the worry is that they might contract COVID-19, even after all of the precautions have been put in place. As you know, the level of quarantine in those spaces is high.
Nobody can visit for the foreseeable future to avoid exposure. And yet there are stories of nursing homes having deadly COVID-19 outbreaks.
Talk to your mother’s doctor. Lay out your concerns and detail how your household runs. Chances are slim that the doctor will want you to move your mother there, given the way that your husband interacts with people outside the home. But trust the doctor. For AARP recommendations on how to support your mother, go to bit.ly/3bAstpW.
Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.


mercurynews--2020-05-04--Miss Manners: I’m afraid our baby’s name will hurt my sister’s feelings

GENTLE READERS : Of what purpose or relevance is etiquette in a time of social distancing ?
As etiquette is a social code of behavior , Miss Manners has always promised not to annoy you with rules when you are home alone .
And now so many of us are .
Still , the importance of considerate behavior ought to be obvious for those who are not literally alone , but sequestered with others .
The old argument for “ just being able to be myself at home , ” generally meaning indulging in doses of slovenliness and selfishness , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ even truly solitary confinement — with the exception of being able to connect through the blessings of electronics — benefits from following some of the basics of civilized life .
Prisoners in the Civil War pleaded for spoons , so that they wouldn ’ t feel like animals eating with their hands .
Anyone who has been bedridden knows that the simple routines of getting dressed and sitting at a table for meals have a stabilizing effect .
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But there are underlying principles that manners share with morality , and the small virtues that arise from concern for others are crucial in close quarters .
Miss Manners has long @ @ @ @ @ @ @ etiquette as pertaining only to “ society ” in the sense of the rich and frivolous , and the illusion that normal people behave naturally .
There is nothing like social distancing to serve as a reminder that society means all of us , and that behaving like our better selves benefits everyone .
DEAR MISS MANNERS : My husband and I are expecting our second baby .
We live near my family , while his family lives across the state .
Our first child ’ s middle name is the name of @ @ @ @ @ @ @ which I happily agreed to , thinking it was a great idea .
Now , with our second child on the way , he wants her middle name to be his sister ’ s .
I am extremely close with his entire family , and would happily do this , as I love his sister dearly — but it puts me in an awkward position , because I have a sister as well .
I voiced this concern to him .
His reasoning is that he should be able to name our daughter @ @ @ @ @ @ @ to my family : They will get to see our daughter all the time , while his won ’ t .
Of course , this makes me feel guilty .
I think it ’ s unreasonable for him to push the issue when he knows I ’ m concerned about hurting my sister ’ s feelings .
GENTLE READER : Reasonableness only goes so far in marital disputes , where it is important that both parties end up satisfied .
Sure , you could argue that it is your family ’ s turn @ @ @ @ @ @ @ neither of you wants your daughter ’ s name to rankle the other .
Give her two middle names .
That is somewhat unusual , but not unheard of .
And please settle peaceably which sister ’ s name should be first — whether alphabetically , by age , or which order makes the prettier monogram .
Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website , www.missmanners.com ; to her email , dearmissmanners @ gmail.com ; or through postal mail to Miss Manners , Andrews McMeel Syndication , 1130 Walnut St. @ @ @ @ @ @ @

Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin

GENTLE READERS: Of what purpose or relevance is etiquette in a time of social distancing?
As etiquette is a social code of behavior, Miss Manners has always promised not to annoy you with rules when you are home alone. And now so many of us are.
Still, the importance of considerate behavior ought to be obvious for those who are not literally alone, but sequestered with others. The old argument for “just being able to be myself at home,” generally meaning indulging in doses of slovenliness and selfishness, always led to no good.
And even truly solitary confinement — with the exception of being able to connect through the blessings of electronics — benefits from following some of the basics of civilized life. Prisoners in the Civil War pleaded for spoons, so that they wouldn’t feel like animals eating with their hands. Anyone who has been bedridden knows that the simple routines of getting dressed and sitting at a table for meals have a stabilizing effect.
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Miss Manners: She wants to turn our music festival into a get-drunk weekend Advice | Miss Manners: My rule is no gift for a second wedding, no attendance for a third Obviously it is the heroic moral virtues that we most prize in times of crisis. But there are underlying principles that manners share with morality, and the small virtues that arise from concern for others are crucial in close quarters.
Miss Manners has long been plagued by the popular misconception of etiquette as pertaining only to “society” in the sense of the rich and frivolous, and the illusion that normal people behave naturally. There is nothing like social distancing to serve as a reminder that society means all of us, and that behaving like our better selves benefits everyone.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband and I are expecting our second baby. We live near my family, while his family lives across the state.
Our first child’s middle name is the name of my husband’s only brother, which I happily agreed to, thinking it was a great idea.
Now, with our second child on the way, he wants her middle name to be his sister’s. I am extremely close with his entire family, and would happily do this, as I love his sister dearly — but it puts me in an awkward position, because I have a sister as well.
I voiced this concern to him. His reasoning is that he should be able to name our daughter after his sister because we live close to my family: They will get to see our daughter all the time, while his won’t. Of course, this makes me feel guilty.
I think it’s unreasonable for him to push the issue when he knows I’m concerned about hurting my sister’s feelings.
Am I being unreasonable?
Want Miss Manners delivered to your inbox for free on weekdays?
GENTLE READER: Reasonableness only goes so far in marital disputes, where it is important that both parties end up satisfied. Sure, you could argue that it is your family’s turn, but Miss Manners would think that neither of you wants your daughter’s name to rankle the other.
Give her two middle names. That is somewhat unusual, but not unheard of. And please settle peaceably which sister’s name should be first — whether alphabetically, by age, or which order makes the prettier monogram.
Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.


mercurynews--2020-05-04--Jill Schlesinger: As businesses reopen, how will companies adapt?

As some parts of the country reopen from the pandemic lockdown , there appear to be three phases that the economy and businesses will move through .
I ’ m calling it T3 , which stands for triage , transition and transformation .
During the preliminary phase of triage , companies learned how to operate in new ways , as workers were sheltering in residence .
Zoom , Skype , Slack and other technological solutions became commonplace .
There was no playbook for anything like this before , so it was trial by fire , with plenty of missteps along @ @ @ @ @ @ @ expected .
The next phase will be transition , where corporations will take a conservative approach that will put worker safety before anything else .
Companies are preparing for a slow transition , where only critical workers will physically be in their corporate facilities .
For every firm , “ critical ” will mean something different , but for most larger service companies , the majority of staff members have been told to prepare to work from home at least through the summer and in some places , like New York , the @ @ @ @ @ @ @ the year .
The final phase of the post-pandemic economy will be transformation .
Businesses , both large and small , are devoting much thought and analysis on how they will emerge and transform from the pandemic .
Scores are trying to answer hard questions : Can some employee functions be performed remotely on a permanent basis ?
Do we need as much office space ?
How can we reconfigure physical workspaces to ensure the health of our staff ?
Do we need to curtail business travel ?
Can we conduct effective meetings @ @ @ @ @ @ @ employ clusters of employees in geographically diverse locations ?
How should we diversify supply chains ?
Can we use robots and technology to do repetitive functions , which often put human workers at risk ?
As they ask these questions , businesses are waiting for Americans to weigh in .
Given that U.S. consumers account for more than two-thirds of the economy , they will be important drivers of the transition and transformation stages .
Some states are relaxing their stay-at-home instructions , but that does not necessarily mean that large numbers of @ @ @ @ @ @ @ previous patterns .
In other words , if you open , will they come ?
Some Americans may feel spooked , especially those who live in or near hotspots .
Even with social distancing measures in place , the fact that your favorite restaurants will not be seating patrons shoulder to shoulder may not be enough for some people .
While we don ’ t yet know how habits will change in the post-COVID-19 economy , NYU Professor Scott Galloway told me that the pandemic is likely to act as an “ accelerant @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
For example , he predicts that department stores are likely in the “ seventh inning of their lifecycles ” and that online sales at places like Amazon , Wal-Mart and Target will continue to grow dramatically .
He does not believe that “ retail is dead , ” rather that only those brands that can provide a unique customer experience will survive .
Other trends that retailers are watching are more pronounced moves toward thrift shopping , which was already occurring for millennials , along with handmade products .
Other sectors like @ @ @ @ @ @ @ turn to at-home solutions instead of going to physical gyms .
The concept of staying in a stranger ’ s home through Airbnb may take a long time to recover and there is likely to be a more pronounced emphasis on technology ’ s ability to augment health care , which could mean a big boost in telemedicine .
Additionally , there will be continued growth of e-sports and gaming , as virtual events replace in stadium ones .
Jill Schlesinger , CFP , is a CBS News business analyst .
A former @ @ @ @ @ @ @ advisory firm , she welcomes comments and questions at askjill @ jillonmoney.com .
Check her website at www.jillonmoney.com .

As some parts of the country reopen from the pandemic lockdown, there appear to be three phases that the economy and businesses will move through. I’m calling it T3, which stands for triage, transition and transformation.
During the preliminary phase of triage, companies learned how to operate in new ways, as workers were sheltering in residence. Zoom, Skype, Slack and other technological solutions became commonplace. There was no playbook for anything like this before, so it was trial by fire, with plenty of missteps along the way, which was to be expected.
The next phase will be transition, where corporations will take a conservative approach that will put worker safety before anything else. Companies are preparing for a slow transition, where only critical workers will physically be in their corporate facilities. For every firm, “critical” will mean something different, but for most larger service companies, the majority of staff members have been told to prepare to work from home at least through the summer and in some places, like New York, the period could extend through the end of the year.
The final phase of the post-pandemic economy will be transformation. Businesses, both large and small, are devoting much thought and analysis on how they will emerge and transform from the pandemic.
Scores are trying to answer hard questions: Can some employee functions be performed remotely on a permanent basis? Do we need as much office space? How can we reconfigure physical workspaces to ensure the health of our staff? Do we need to curtail business travel? Can we conduct effective meetings and conferences using telecommunications? Should we employ clusters of employees in geographically diverse locations? How should we diversify supply chains? Can we use robots and technology to do repetitive functions, which often put human workers at risk?
As they ask these questions, businesses are waiting for Americans to weigh in. Given that U.S. consumers account for more than two-thirds of the economy, they will be important drivers of the transition and transformation stages. Some states are relaxing their stay-at-home instructions, but that does not necessarily mean that large numbers of consumers will be ready to resume their previous patterns. In other words, if you open, will they come?
Some Americans may feel spooked, especially those who live in or near hotspots. Even with social distancing measures in place, the fact that your favorite restaurants will not be seating patrons shoulder to shoulder may not be enough for some people.
While we don’t yet know how habits will change in the post-COVID-19 economy, NYU Professor Scott Galloway told me that the pandemic is likely to act as an “accelerant” of trends that were already emerging. For example, he predicts that department stores are likely in the “seventh inning of their lifecycles” and that online sales at places like Amazon, Wal-Mart and Target will continue to grow dramatically.
He does not believe that “retail is dead,” rather that only those brands that can provide a unique customer experience will survive. Other trends that retailers are watching are more pronounced moves toward thrift shopping, which was already occurring for millennials, along with handmade products.
Other sectors like fitness could be transformed, as people turn to at-home solutions instead of going to physical gyms. The concept of staying in a stranger’s home through Airbnb may take a long time to recover and there is likely to be a more pronounced emphasis on technology’s ability to augment health care, which could mean a big boost in telemedicine. Additionally, there will be continued growth of e-sports and gaming, as virtual events replace in stadium ones.
Jill Schlesinger, CFP, is a CBS News business analyst. A former options trader and CIO of an investment advisory firm, she welcomes comments and questions at askjill@jillonmoney.com. Check her website at www.jillonmoney.com.


mercurynews--2020-05-04--Mother’s Day 2020: Ways to celebrate mom while sheltering in place

It ’ s going to be a very different Mother ’ s Day for most families .
There won ’ t be fancy dinners out , trips to the theater or other such special activities that we normally associate with celebrating mom during her special day .
Instead , they ’ ll be sheltering in place , quarantine and social distancing .
Fun , right ?
Well , actually , it can be .
We ’ ve come up with a bunch of fun ways for you to enjoy this year ’ s Mother ’ s Day without ever leaving @ @ @ @ @ @ @ your life like music ?
Movies ?
Baked goods ?
All of those are still options , even during the coronavirus pandemic .
You just need to get creative and plan ahead .
So , check out our suggestions and get ready for a very different , but still very special Mother ’ s Day 2020 .
You probably won ’ t be taking mom to a concert this year , unless the folks who are sheltering-in-place with her happen to know how to play instruments ( very well ) .
But that @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ’ t be a big part of the occasion .
We ’ ve come up with a great Mother ’ s Day Playlist , which you can listen to for free by clicking here .
It runs right around 100 minutes , includes such stellar artists as Kanye West , Pink Floyd , Martina McBride and the Shirelles , and draws from country , rock , pop and other genres .
It should make for a wonderful soundtrack for any Mother ’ s Day celebration .
We ’ ll give you just a @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , again , for more you ’ ll have to click here .
Buying a Mother ’ s Day gift will likely be a little trickier this year , given that so many stores are closed and the whole shelter-in-place deal .
But whoa to the one who uses those things as excuses to not get something good for mom on her special day .
To help out with the situation , we ’ ve come up with a roundup of seven stay-at-home Bay Area gift ideas , ranging from meals to mojitos @ @ @ @ @ @ @ the special mom in your life smiling on Sunday .
Does the special mom in your life dig the Great American Songbook ?
If so , then your Mother ’ s Day shopping could be done in just a few clicks as you order the May 10 livestream for “ Hershey Felder as Irving Berlin.
” The acclaimed “ play-with-music ” is required viewing for fans of the legendary composer , known for such classic songs as “ Puttin ’ on the Ritz , ” “ White Christmas ” and “ God Bless @ @ @ @ @ @ @ be nothing short of phenomenal in the role .
Plus , as an added bonus , a portion of the proceeds benefit Bay Area theater troupes Berkeley Rep and TheatreWorks .
Click here for more information .
Let ’ s face it : There ’ s a better than decent chance that most of us are going to end up gathered around the TV at some point on Mother ’ s Day .
And that ’ s perfectly OK. No judgement here !
We just want to make sure that you ’ re @ @ @ @ @ @ @ s Day .
So , we ’ ve come up with some intriguing options for your viewing pleasure .
If none of those TV recommendations grab you , then consider streaming the latest animated flick from Emeryville ’ s own Pixar Studios .
Sure , the story line — dealing with two elf brothers on a quest to bring their dearly departed dad back from the grave for one day — might be a bit better suited for Father ’ s Day .
But this is high-quality content for the whole family , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ cost a little more on some platforms than you ’ re used to paying for a rental , but that ’ s part of the deal when it comes to watching new movies in these shelter-in-place days .
And this one is most definitely worth it , as our film critic reports in this review .
Nothing says “ I love you ” quite like baked goods .
So don ’ t let sheltering-in-place stop you from saying a big “ I love you ” to mom with some tasty treats from a @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , many of the Bay Area ’ s free-standing bakeries are open for pickup and delivery .
Check out some recommendations here .

It’s going to be a very different Mother’s Day for most families.
There won’t be fancy dinners out, trips to the theater or other such special activities that we normally associate with celebrating mom during her special day.
Instead, they’ll be sheltering in place, quarantine and social distancing.
Fun, right? Well, actually, it can be.
We’ve come up with a bunch of fun ways for you to enjoy this year’s Mother’s Day without ever leaving the house.
Does the mother in your life like music? Movies? Baked goods? All of those are still options, even during the coronavirus pandemic. You just need to get creative and plan ahead.
So, check out our suggestions and get ready for a very different, but still very special Mother’s Day 2020.
You probably won’t be taking mom to a concert this year, unless the folks who are sheltering-in-place with her happen to know how to play instruments (very well). But that doesn’t mean that tunes shouldn’t be a big part of the occasion.
We’ve come up with a great Mother’s Day Playlist, which you can listen to for free by clicking here. It runs right around 100 minutes, includes such stellar artists as Kanye West, Pink Floyd, Martina McBride and the Shirelles, and draws from country, rock, pop and other genres.
It should make for a wonderful soundtrack for any Mother’s Day celebration. We’ll give you just a one-song sampler of it here:
But, again, for more you’ll have to click here.
Buying a Mother’s Day gift will likely be a little trickier this year, given that so many stores are closed and the whole shelter-in-place deal. But whoa to the one who uses those things as excuses to not get something good for mom on her special day.
To help out with the situation, we’ve come up with a roundup of seven stay-at-home Bay Area gift ideas, ranging from meals to mojitos. Any of these gifts should have the special mom in your life smiling on Sunday.
Does the special mom in your life dig the Great American Songbook? If so, then your Mother’s Day shopping could be done in just a few clicks as you order the May 10 livestream for “Hershey Felder as Irving Berlin.”
The acclaimed “play-with-music” is required viewing for fans of the legendary composer, known for such classic songs as “Puttin’ on the Ritz,” “White Christmas” and “God Bless America.” And Felder is said to be nothing short of phenomenal in the role.
Plus, as an added bonus, a portion of the proceeds benefit Bay Area theater troupes Berkeley Rep and TheatreWorks. Click here for more information.
Let’s face it: There’s a better than decent chance that most of us are going to end up gathered around the TV at some point on Mother’s Day. And that’s perfectly OK. No judgement here!
We just want to make sure that you’re watching some quality programming on Mother’s Day. So, we’ve come up with some intriguing options for your viewing pleasure.
If none of those TV recommendations grab you, then consider streaming the latest animated flick from Emeryville’s own Pixar Studios.
Sure, the story line — dealing with two elf brothers on a quest to bring their dearly departed dad back from the grave for one day — might be a bit better suited for Father’s Day. But this is high-quality content for the whole family, no matter the equation.
It might cost a little more on some platforms than you’re used to paying for a rental, but that’s part of the deal when it comes to watching new movies in these shelter-in-place days. And this one is most definitely worth it, as our film critic reports in this review.
Nothing says “I love you” quite like baked goods. So don’t let sheltering-in-place stop you from saying a big “I love you” to mom with some tasty treats from a local bakery.
Despite the coronavirus pandemic, many of the Bay Area’s free-standing bakeries are open for pickup and delivery. Check out some recommendations here.
Mom surely would like a nice meal for her special day, right? And there are a number of great local restaurants offering special take-out meals for Mother’s Day. The list includes such establishments as the Grill on the Alley, Left bank and Alexander’s Steakhouse. See our list of restaurants offering special take-out meals for Mother’s Day here.


mercurynews--2020-05-04--Dear Abby: I was a zombie on drugs. Now my family doesn’t like the new me.

DEAR ABBY : I had weight-loss surgery a year ago .
I ’ m now off all medications ( high blood pressure , antidepressants , etc . )
and take only one multivitamin daily .
I feel like I ’ m 25 again .
However , I have also changed mentally .
After many years of being a zombie on antidepressants , I feel like I have finally “ awakened.
” I come from a dysfunctional , abusive childhood .
My father abused my mother .
I was diagnosed with dysthymia years ago [ a form of depression ] , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
• Dear Abby : Why did she think this was an appropriate response to my sickness ?
• Dear Abby : He doesn ’ t remember the nasty thing he said , but I can ’ t forget • Dear Abby : Dad ’ s a drunk , and kids are told to ‘ get over it ’ • Dear Abby : I found these photos taken in my fiance ’ s bedroom • Dear Abby : I just found out what a horrible person my uncle is I now feel my @ @ @ @ @ @ @ depression .
I ’ m no longer afraid of speaking up and , after 20 years , I actually have opinions of my own .
Needless to say , my family ( husband , grown children and in-laws ) are not used to this side of me .
I find myself feeling resentful , anxious and envious of certain immediate family and in-law family dynamics now .
I don ’ t want to upset my family by being so vocal and opinionated , but I don ’ t want to get back on @ @ @ @ @ @ @ little faith that counseling will do much good .
I ’ m afraid I ’ ll be pushed into taking meds again .
I feel like I ’ m between a rock and a hard place right now .
Any advice ?
DEAR TOUGH SPOT : Keeping in mind that no one can force you back on medications if you don ’ t want them , I do think you could benefit from talking with a licensed mental health professional about this .
You have made major changes in your life , and @ @ @ @ @ @ @ when you were prescribed the medications that made you feel like a zombie .
A mental health professional can help you to sort out whether you have a problem or whether your family members do in dealing with the new you .
DEAR ABBY : In the future when I am able , I would like to travel with a mix of single and married ladies .
I ’ m in a committed relationship , and when I discussed this with my partner , we had a difference of opinion .
She believes @ @ @ @ @ @ @ not travel with other people .
She believes happy couples should travel together and not independently .
Is that controlling ?
I have traveled independently in prior committed relationships , and this has never been an issue .
Should I honor her request or deny it ?
She is pushing me to respect this rule and says it applies to her as well because she believes “ females ” let loose when they are away from their significant others .
I get the distinct feeling that if I travel independently , there will @ @ @ @ @ @ @ or she will do something in my absence that will change the dynamics of our relationship .
DEAR LOVE : There are already issues that will change the dynamics of your relationship — your partner ’ s insecurity and need to control , and your need for some freedom .
Unless you are laying down “ rules ” for her to follow as she is trying to do to you , step back and take a second look at this relationship .
Healthy people who love each other want their partner to be @ @ @ @ @ @ @ or apart .
This takes trust , self-confidence and courage .
Rather than the wind beneath your wings , it appears your partner may be more of an anchor .
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren , also known as Jeanne Phillips , and was founded by her mother , Pauline Phillips .
Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O .
Box 69440 , Los Angeles , CA 90069 .

DEAR ABBY: I had weight-loss surgery a year ago. I’m now off all medications (high blood pressure, antidepressants, etc.) and take only one multivitamin daily. I feel like I’m 25 again.
However, I have also changed mentally. After many years of being a zombie on antidepressants, I feel like I have finally “awakened.”
I come from a dysfunctional, abusive childhood. My father abused my mother. I was diagnosed with dysthymia years ago [a form of depression], and I feel the diagnosis was correct.
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Dear Abby: My financial adviser won’t listen to me, but he insists he’s not sexist Advice | Dear Abby: Our teen’s messy breakup has had awkward repercussions for us
Dear Abby: Our teen’s messy breakup has had awkward repercussions for us Advice | Dear Abby: I was annoyed to discover why our friends picked this restaurant I now feel my dysthymia has turned more into anxiety than depression. I’m no longer afraid of speaking up and, after 20 years, I actually have opinions of my own.
Needless to say, my family (husband, grown children and in-laws) are not used to this side of me. I find myself feeling resentful, anxious and envious of certain immediate family and in-law family dynamics now. I don’t want to upset my family by being so vocal and opinionated, but I don’t want to get back on mind-altering prescriptions either.
I also have little faith that counseling will do much good. I’m afraid I’ll be pushed into taking meds again. I feel like I’m between a rock and a hard place right now. Any advice?
A TOUGH SPOT IN NORTH CAROLINA
DEAR TOUGH SPOT: Keeping in mind that no one can force you back on medications if you don’t want them, I do think you could benefit from talking with a licensed mental health professional about this.
You have made major changes in your life, and are no longer the person you were when you were prescribed the medications that made you feel like a zombie. A mental health professional can help you to sort out whether you have a problem or whether your family members do in dealing with the new you.
DEAR ABBY: In the future when I am able, I would like to travel with a mix of single and married ladies. I’m in a committed relationship, and when I discussed this with my partner, we had a difference of opinion.
She believes that happy individuals in committed relationships do not travel with other people. She believes happy couples should travel together and not independently. Is that controlling? I have traveled independently in prior committed relationships, and this has never been an issue.
Should I honor her request or deny it? She is pushing me to respect this rule and says it applies to her as well because she believes “females” let loose when they are away from their significant others.
I get the distinct feeling that if I travel independently, there will be an emotional price to pay, or she will do something in my absence that will change the dynamics of our relationship.
LOVE OR CONTROL
DEAR LOVE: There are already issues that will change the dynamics of your relationship — your partner’s insecurity and need to control, and your need for some freedom.
Unless you are laying down “rules” for her to follow as she is trying to do to you, step back and take a second look at this relationship.
Healthy people who love each other want their partner to be happy and fulfilled whether they are together or apart. This takes trust, self-confidence and courage. Rather than the wind beneath your wings, it appears your partner may be more of an anchor.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.


mercurynews--2020-05-04--The Latest: Experts back Japan plan to extend virus measures

By The Associated Press The Latest on the coronavirus pandemic .
The new coronavirus causes mild or moderate symptoms for most people .
For some , especially older adults and people with existing health problems , it can cause more severe illness or death .
— Japan says experts back plan to extend state of emergency through May .
— New Zealand reports no new cases for first time since mid-March outbreak .
— Trump says he thinks COVID-19 vaccine will be available by end of year .
TOKYO — Japan says a panel of experts supports the government ’ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ of emergency through the end of May .
Prime Minister Shinzo Abe said Friday he planned to keep the current coronavirus measures in place for another month , in accordance with recommendations from health experts .
They noted the rise in new cases has slowed but Japan ’ s medical system is still overburdened .
Economy Minister Yasutoshi Nishimura told reporters Monday that experts backed the government ’ s plan to extend social distancing measures until May 31 and called it “ appropriate.
” Nishimura said Sunday the current measures in Tokyo and @ @ @ @ @ @ @ warning zones are expected to stay in place , while 34 other prefectures would be allowed to somewhat ease restrictions on the condition they take ample preventive steps .
Later on Monday , after approval by parliamentary committees , Abe is set to formally announce an extension and explain details .
Japan has had more than 15,000 virus cases and 510 deaths as of Monday , according to the health ministry .
BEIJING — China reported three new coronavirus cases Monday , all brought from overseas , and no additional deaths .
A @ @ @ @ @ @ @ hospital because of the virus , with about 1,000 under monitoring and isolation after showing symptoms or testing positive without symptoms .
China has reported 4,633 deaths from COVID-19 among 82,880 cases .
SAN FRANCISCO — Small groups of people ignored closures and set down their towels and umbrellas on Orange County ’ s warm beaches Sunday , defying stay-at-home orders to slow the spread of the coronavirus as pressure to reopen parts of California continues to build .
Cameras from news helicopters captured dozens of people scattered across a stretch of sand @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
The crowds were sparse but offered proof that despite stepped-up patrols and warnings to stay away , some people were determined to get to the beach .
City spokesman John Pope said lifeguards and police officers asked more than 2,500 people to leave .
The previous weekend , a heatwave drew tens of thousands of people to Newport Beach , prompting Gov .
Gavin Newsom to shut beaches in Orange County .
A Huntington Beach police spokeswoman said people were cooperating , and no citations had been issued as of Sunday afternoon @ @ @ @ @ @ @ California were set to allow many businesses to reopen Monday as a direct challenge to Newsom ’ s order .
Yuba and Sutter counties north of Sacramento would join Modoc County , which began allowing hair salons , churches , restaurants and the county ’ s only movie theater to reopen Friday as long as people stay 6 feet ( 1.8 meters ) apart .
Modoc County Sheriff Tex Dowdy said the zero confirmed cases of COVID-19 among Modoc ’ s 9,000 residents was a deciding factor in permitting a “ staged , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ reported over the weekend , officials said .
WELLINGTON , New Zealand — New Zealand reported no new coronavirus cases Monday , marking a significant moment that indicated the country ’ s bold strategy of trying to eliminate the virus was working .
It was the first time since the outbreak took hold in mid-March that the country reported zero new cases .
Director-General of Health Ashley Bloomfield said the figures were clearly encouraging , but the result represented a moment in time and it won ’ t be until later this week @ @ @ @ @ @ @ are continuing to pop up in the community .
He said the result was a cause for celebration and was symbolic of the efforts of the entire country .
New Zealand closed its borders and imposed a strict monthlong lockdown after the outbreak began .
The lockdown rules were eased a little last week to help reopen the economy , but many restrictions remain in place .
Many businesses — including most retail stores and sit-down restaurants — remain closed , most school children are learning from home , and people are required @ @ @ @ @ @ @ has reported nearly 1,500 cases of the virus and 20 deaths .
KUALA LUMPUR , Malaysia — Many business sectors reopened Monday in some parts of Malaysia for the first time since a partial coronavirus lockdown began March 18 .
The easing of restrictions , days before the lockdown was due to end May 12 , came as Prime Minister Muhyiddin Yassin ’ s government sought to balance between curbing the virus and reviving the hard-hit economy .
But the move has split public opinion amid fears that the sudden reopening of economic @ @ @ @ @ @ @ infection .
Nine of the country ’ s 13 states have either refused to open up yet or restricted the list of businesses that can operate .
More than half a million Malaysians have also protested by signing online petitions to call for a more gradual approach to rolling back the restrictions .
Muhyiddin said Friday it was time to heal the economy , which has lost billions of dollars , but businesses must follow strict health measures and mass gatherings will still be banned .
That means places such as schools , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , group sports are prohibited , and interstate travel remains banned .
Virus cases have dropped sharply in recent weeks but the number crept up with 227 infections reported over the weekend .
Malaysia has confirmed 6,298 cases , with 105 deaths .
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump says he believes a vaccine for COVID-19 will be available by the end of the year .
Trump also says the U.S. government is putting its “ full power and might ” behind remdesivir , a drug that has shown early promise as a treatment @ @ @ @ @ @ @ coronavirus .
Trump sat inside the Lincoln Memorial and fielded questions from two Fox hosts , as well as from people who submitted questions over Fox ’ s social media platforms .
Trump responded to a Nebraska man who recovered from COVID-19 by saying : “ We think we are going to have a vaccine by the end of this year.
” He also said his administration was pushing hard for remdesivir .
U.S. public health officials have said a vaccine is probably a year to 18 months away .
But Dr. Anthony @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ’ s conceivable , if a vaccine is developed soon , it could be in wide distribution as soon as January .
NEW YORK — After working with neighboring states on coronavirus-related closing and reopening plans , Gov .
Andrew Cuomo said Sunday that New York will join with states from Massachusetts to Delaware to create a regional supply chain for masks , gowns , ventilators , testing supplies and other equipment vital to fighting the disease .
The states are joining together after months of dealing separately with what Cuomo said was @ @ @ @ @ @ @ purchasing process that pitted all 50 states against each other , as well as the federal government and other entities , driving up prices as supplies dried up .
New York buys about $ 2 billion worth of medical equipment supplies per year , Cuomo said .
The other states joining the consortium together spend about $ 5 billion per year .
Working together , they ’ ll have stronger purchasing power and improve their clout with global suppliers , Cuomo said .
“ It will make us more competitive in the international @ @ @ @ @ @ @ taxpayers money , ” Cuomo said .
“ I also believe it will actually help us get the equipment , because we have trouble still getting the equipment.
” The other states in the consortium are Connecticut , Rhode Island , New Jersey and Pennsylvania .
One goal , the states ’ governors said , is to find suppliers within the region , instead of relying on swamped manufacturers in China and other faraway places .
WASHINGTON — Michigan ’ s governor says gun-carrying protesters who demonstrated inside her state ’ s Capitol @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ” and “ awful parts ” of U.S. history .
Democrat Gretchen Whitmer tells CNN that the protests featured “ Confederate Flags , and nooses , ” as well as swastikas .
Members of the Michigan Liberty Militia protested the state ’ s stay-at-home orders this week , some with weapons and tactical gear and their faces partially covered .
They went inside the Capitol , where being armed is allowed , then demanded access to the House floor , which is prohibited .
Some went to the Senate gallery , where a @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
Michigan ’ s Republican-controlled Legislature has questioned Whitmer ’ s authority to extend stay-at-home orders amid the coronavirus pandemic .
But the governor used an executive order to extend a state of emergency declaration and has directed most businesses statewide to remain closed .
Mentioned as a possible running mate for presumptive Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden , Whitmer said Sunday , “ This isn ’ t something we just negotiate ourselves out of and it ’ s a political matter.
” “ This is a public health crisis , ” she @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Mike Pompeo says China has been responsible for the spread of disease in the past and must be held accountable for the coronavirus pandemic that originated in the country .
In comments likely to spark protests from Beijing and elsewhere , Pompeo said “ China has a history of infecting the world.
” He cited poor safety and security at epidemiological laboratories , including in the city of Wuhan where the virus was first reported .
He stressed that he had no reason to believe the virus was deliberately spread but he ramped @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Chinese for their response to the outbreak .
“ Remember , China has a history of infecting the world , and they have a history of running substandard laboratories , ” Pompeo said Sunday on ABC ’ s “ This Week ” program .
“ These are not the first times that we ’ ve had a world exposed to viruses as a result of failures in a Chinese lab .
And so , while the intelligence community continues to do its work , they should continue to do that , and verify @ @ @ @ @ @ @ can tell you that there is a significant amount of evidence that this came from that laboratory in Wuhan.
” Pompeo appeared to be referring to previous outbreaks of respiratory viruses , like SARS , which started in China .
But his remark may be seen as offensive in China given the history of U.S. discrimination against the Chinese and people of Chinese origin dating to the 19th century .
ROME — On the eve of the start in Italy of partially eased restriction on citizens ’ movements during COVID-19 lockdown , the @ @ @ @ @ @ @ of grim daily tallies of caseload and deaths .
Health Ministry figures put the number of deaths in the 24-hour period ending Sunday evening at 174 , the lowest day-to-day number since 168 on March 10 , at the start of national lockdown .
The number of new cases , 1,389 , was also the lowest the nation has seen in two months .
Italy ’ s number of known COVID-19 infections total is 210,717 , although authorities say the number is likely higher as many infections in people with no or almost @ @ @ @ @ @ @ undetected .
Italy ’ s death toll stands at 28,884 , but that number , too , could be much higher , since many elderly persons in recent weeks died in nursing homes but weren ’ t tested to see if they had coronavirus infection .
OLYMPIA , Wash. — More than 100 state parks , trails and boating sites across Washington state will re-open Tuesday as some coronavirus restrictions are eased , but many popular sites remain closed indefinitely , according to officials .
Parks that open will be limited to daytime @ @ @ @ @ @ @ spaces will be reduced at some urban parks to discourage crowding .
Public lands managed by the Department of Natural Resources and Department of Fish and Wildlife also will reopen Tuesday .
All ocean beach parks and parks along the Columbia River Gorge on the Washington-Oregon border will remain closed to reduce impacts on rural communities and prevent crowds , according to Washington State Parks .
Discussions on when those sites could open are ongoing and involve park administrators , local community leaders and Oregon officials , state parks officials said .
The @ @ @ @ @ @ @ month and are being re-opened under the first phase of the Gov .
Jay Inslee ’ s plan to ease rules imposed to prevent the spread of the virus .
Beaches and campgrounds would re-open under the second phase of the plan , although large gatherings would still be banned .
WASHINGTON — The Justice Department has filed a statement of interest siding with a Virginia church suing the state ’ s governor over restrictions because of the coronavirus .
The filing was made Sunday in support of the Lighthouse Fellowship Church .
@ @ @ @ @ @ @ pastor , Kevin Wilson , was issued a criminal citation because he held a service with 16 people on April 5 .
Authorities allege the church violated the state ’ s ban on gatherings of more than 10 people .
The Justice Department ’ s filing , citing the lawsuit , says the church had maintained social distancing and had extensive sanitizing of common surfaces .
The church said attendees had to stay 6 feet apart and use hand sanitizer before entering the building .
The Justice Department says Virginia “ can not @ @ @ @ @ @ @ similar , secular gatherings.
” A judge had denied the church ’ s motion for a temporary restraining order and preliminary injunction on Friday .
NEW YORK — A New York City police officer who was caught on video Saturday pointing a stun gun at a man and violently taking him to the ground over an alleged social distancing violation has been stripped of his gun and badge and placed on desk duty pending an internal investigation .
Bystander video showed the plainclothes officer , who was not wearing a protective face mask @ @ @ @ @ @ @ face , punching him in the shoulder and dragging him to a sidewalk after leveling him in a crosswalk in Manhattan ’ s East Village .
“ There will unquestionably be a careful look at what happened there , ” Mayor Bill de Blasio said Sunday .
Police spokeswoman Sgt .
Mary Frances O ’ Donnell said Wright “ took a fighting stance against the officer ” when he was ordered to disperse and was arrested on charges including assault on a police officer and resisting arrest .
Wright had not been arraigned @ @ @ @ @ @ @ .
A message seeking comment was left with the police officers ’ union .
Follow AP news coverage of the coronavirus pandemic at https : //apnews.com/VirusOutbreak and https : //apnews.com/UnderstandingtheOutbreak .

By The Associated Press
The Latest on the coronavirus pandemic. The new coronavirus causes mild or moderate symptoms for most people. For some, especially older adults and people with existing health problems, it can cause more severe illness or death.
TOP OF THE HOUR:
— Japan says experts back plan to extend state of emergency through May.
— China reports 3 new coronavirus cases, no deaths.
— Small groups ignore closures and hit warm California beaches.
— New Zealand reports no new cases for first time since mid-March outbreak.
— Trump says he thinks COVID-19 vaccine will be available by end of year.
___
TOKYO — Japan says a panel of experts supports the government’s plan to extend the nationwide state of emergency through the end of May.
Prime Minister Shinzo Abe said Friday he planned to keep the current coronavirus measures in place for another month, in accordance with recommendations from health experts. They noted the rise in new cases has slowed but Japan’s medical system is still overburdened.
Economy Minister Yasutoshi Nishimura told reporters Monday that experts backed the government’s plan to extend social distancing measures until May 31 and called it “appropriate.”
Nishimura said Sunday the current measures in Tokyo and a dozen other prefectures designated as special warning zones are expected to stay in place, while 34 other prefectures would be allowed to somewhat ease restrictions on the condition they take ample preventive steps.
Later on Monday, after approval by parliamentary committees, Abe is set to formally announce an extension and explain details.
Japan has had more than 15,000 virus cases and 510 deaths as of Monday, according to the health ministry.
___
BEIJING — China reported three new coronavirus cases Monday, all brought from overseas, and no additional deaths.
A total of 481 people remain in the hospital because of the virus, with about 1,000 under monitoring and isolation after showing symptoms or testing positive without symptoms.
China has reported 4,633 deaths from COVID-19 among 82,880 cases.
___
SAN FRANCISCO — Small groups of people ignored closures and set down their towels and umbrellas on Orange County’s warm beaches Sunday, defying stay-at-home orders to slow the spread of the coronavirus as pressure to reopen parts of California continues to build.
Cameras from news helicopters captured dozens of people scattered across a stretch of sand known as The Wedge in Newport Beach. The crowds were sparse but offered proof that despite stepped-up patrols and warnings to stay away, some people were determined to get to the beach.
City spokesman John Pope said lifeguards and police officers asked more than 2,500 people to leave. The previous weekend, a heatwave drew tens of thousands of people to Newport Beach, prompting Gov. Gavin Newsom to shut beaches in Orange County.
A Huntington Beach police spokeswoman said people were cooperating, and no citations had been issued as of Sunday afternoon.
Meanwhile, two counties in Northern California were set to allow many businesses to reopen Monday as a direct challenge to Newsom’s order.
Yuba and Sutter counties north of Sacramento would join Modoc County, which began allowing hair salons, churches, restaurants and the county’s only movie theater to reopen Friday as long as people stay 6 feet (1.8 meters) apart.
Modoc County Sheriff Tex Dowdy said the zero confirmed cases of COVID-19 among Modoc’s 9,000 residents was a deciding factor in permitting a “staged, safe” reopening. No problems were reported over the weekend, officials said.
___
WELLINGTON, New Zealand — New Zealand reported no new coronavirus cases Monday, marking a significant moment that indicated the country’s bold strategy of trying to eliminate the virus was working.
It was the first time since the outbreak took hold in mid-March that the country reported zero new cases. Director-General of Health Ashley Bloomfield said the figures were clearly encouraging, but the result represented a moment in time and it won’t be until later this week that officials will know if new cases are continuing to pop up in the community. He said the result was a cause for celebration and was symbolic of the efforts of the entire country.
New Zealand closed its borders and imposed a strict monthlong lockdown after the outbreak began. The lockdown rules were eased a little last week to help reopen the economy, but many restrictions remain in place.
Many businesses — including most retail stores and sit-down restaurants — remain closed, most school children are learning from home, and people are required to maintain social distancing. New Zealand has reported nearly 1,500 cases of the virus and 20 deaths.
___
KUALA LUMPUR, Malaysia — Many business sectors reopened Monday in some parts of Malaysia for the first time since a partial coronavirus lockdown began March 18.
The easing of restrictions, days before the lockdown was due to end May 12, came as Prime Minister Muhyiddin Yassin’s government sought to balance between curbing the virus and reviving the hard-hit economy. But the move has split public opinion amid fears that the sudden reopening of economic activities could spark a new wave of infection.
Nine of the country’s 13 states have either refused to open up yet or restricted the list of businesses that can operate. More than half a million Malaysians have also protested by signing online petitions to call for a more gradual approach to rolling back the restrictions.
Muhyiddin said Friday it was time to heal the economy, which has lost billions of dollars, but businesses must follow strict health measures and mass gatherings will still be banned. That means places such as schools, cinemas and worship houses will stay shut, group sports are prohibited, and interstate travel remains banned.
Virus cases have dropped sharply in recent weeks but the number crept up with 227 infections reported over the weekend. Malaysia has confirmed 6,298 cases, with 105 deaths.
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WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump says he believes a vaccine for COVID-19 will be available by the end of the year.
Trump also says the U.S. government is putting its “full power and might” behind remdesivir, a drug that has shown early promise as a treatment for the disease caused by the new coronavirus.
Trump commented Sunday night during a televised town hall sponsored by Fox News Channel.
Trump sat inside the Lincoln Memorial and fielded questions from two Fox hosts, as well as from people who submitted questions over Fox’s social media platforms.
Trump responded to a Nebraska man who recovered from COVID-19 by saying: “We think we are going to have a vaccine by the end of this year.”
He also said his administration was pushing hard for remdesivir.
U.S. public health officials have said a vaccine is probably a year to 18 months away. But Dr. Anthony Fauci said in late April that it’s conceivable, if a vaccine is developed soon, it could be in wide distribution as soon as January.
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NEW YORK — After working with neighboring states on coronavirus-related closing and reopening plans, Gov. Andrew Cuomo said Sunday that New York will join with states from Massachusetts to Delaware to create a regional supply chain for masks, gowns, ventilators, testing supplies and other equipment vital to fighting the disease.
The states are joining together after months of dealing separately with what Cuomo said was a “totally inefficient and ineffective” purchasing process that pitted all 50 states against each other, as well as the federal government and other entities, driving up prices as supplies dried up.
New York buys about $2 billion worth of medical equipment supplies per year, Cuomo said. The other states joining the consortium together spend about $5 billion per year. Working together, they’ll have stronger purchasing power and improve their clout with global suppliers, Cuomo said.
“It will make us more competitive in the international marketplace and I believe it will save taxpayers money,” Cuomo said. “I also believe it will actually help us get the equipment, because we have trouble still getting the equipment.”
The other states in the consortium are Connecticut, Rhode Island, New Jersey and Pennsylvania. One goal, the states’ governors said, is to find suppliers within the region, instead of relying on swamped manufacturers in China and other faraway places.
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WASHINGTON — Michigan’s governor says gun-carrying protesters who demonstrated inside her state’s Capitol “depicted some of the worst racism” and “awful parts” of U.S. history.
Democrat Gretchen Whitmer tells CNN that the protests featured “Confederate Flags, and nooses,” as well as swastikas.
Members of the Michigan Liberty Militia protested the state’s stay-at-home orders this week, some with weapons and tactical gear and their faces partially covered. They went inside the Capitol, where being armed is allowed, then demanded access to the House floor, which is prohibited.
Some went to the Senate gallery, where a senator said armed men shouted at her.
Michigan’s Republican-controlled Legislature has questioned Whitmer’s authority to extend stay-at-home orders amid the coronavirus pandemic. But the governor used an executive order to extend a state of emergency declaration and has directed most businesses statewide to remain closed.
Mentioned as a possible running mate for presumptive Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden, Whitmer said Sunday, “This isn’t something we just negotiate ourselves out of and it’s a political matter.”
“This is a public health crisis,” she said.
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WASHINGTON — Secretary of State Mike Pompeo says China has been responsible for the spread of disease in the past and must be held accountable for the coronavirus pandemic that originated in the country.
In comments likely to spark protests from Beijing and elsewhere, Pompeo said “China has a history of infecting the world.” He cited poor safety and security at epidemiological laboratories, including in the city of Wuhan where the virus was first reported.
He stressed that he had no reason to believe the virus was deliberately spread but he ramped up already harsh U.S. criticism of the Chinese for their response to the outbreak.
“Remember, China has a history of infecting the world, and they have a history of running substandard laboratories,” Pompeo said Sunday on ABC’s “This Week” program.
“These are not the first times that we’ve had a world exposed to viruses as a result of failures in a Chinese lab. And so, while the intelligence community continues to do its work, they should continue to do that, and verify so that we are certain, I can tell you that there is a significant amount of evidence that this came from that laboratory in Wuhan.”
Pompeo appeared to be referring to previous outbreaks of respiratory viruses, like SARS, which started in China. But his remark may be seen as offensive in China given the history of U.S. discrimination against the Chinese and people of Chinese origin dating to the 19th century.
___
ROME — On the eve of the start in Italy of partially eased restriction on citizens’ movements during COVID-19 lockdown, the nation received some encouraging news after weeks of grim daily tallies of caseload and deaths.
Health Ministry figures put the number of deaths in the 24-hour period ending Sunday evening at 174, the lowest day-to-day number since 168 on March 10, at the start of national lockdown.
The number of new cases, 1,389, was also the lowest the nation has seen in two months. Italy’s number of known COVID-19 infections total is 210,717, although authorities say the number is likely higher as many infections in people with no or almost no symptoms are believed to have gone undetected.
Italy’s death toll stands at 28,884, but that number, too, could be much higher, since many elderly persons in recent weeks died in nursing homes but weren’t tested to see if they had coronavirus infection.
___
OLYMPIA, Wash. — More than 100 state parks, trails and boating sites across Washington state will re-open Tuesday as some coronavirus restrictions are eased, but many popular sites remain closed indefinitely, according to officials.
Parks that open will be limited to daytime use only and the number of parking spaces will be reduced at some urban parks to discourage crowding. Public lands managed by the Department of Natural Resources and Department of Fish and Wildlife also will reopen Tuesday.
All ocean beach parks and parks along the Columbia River Gorge on the Washington-Oregon border will remain closed to reduce impacts on rural communities and prevent crowds, according to Washington State Parks.
Discussions on when those sites could open are ongoing and involve park administrators, local community leaders and Oregon officials, state parks officials said.
The parks have been closed more than a month and are being re-opened under the first phase of the Gov. Jay Inslee’s plan to ease rules imposed to prevent the spread of the virus. Beaches and campgrounds would re-open under the second phase of the plan, although large gatherings would still be banned.
___
WASHINGTON — The Justice Department has filed a statement of interest siding with a Virginia church suing the state’s governor over restrictions because of the coronavirus.
The filing was made Sunday in support of the Lighthouse Fellowship Church.
The lawsuit alleges the church’s pastor, Kevin Wilson, was issued a criminal citation because he held a service with 16 people on April 5.
Authorities allege the church violated the state’s ban on gatherings of more than 10 people.
The Justice Department’s filing, citing the lawsuit, says the church had maintained social distancing and had extensive sanitizing of common surfaces. The church said attendees had to stay 6 feet apart and use hand sanitizer before entering the building.
The Justice Department says Virginia “cannot treat religious gatherings less favorably than other similar, secular gatherings.”
A judge had denied the church’s motion for a temporary restraining order and preliminary injunction on Friday.
___
NEW YORK — A New York City police officer who was caught on video Saturday pointing a stun gun at a man and violently taking him to the ground over an alleged social distancing violation has been stripped of his gun and badge and placed on desk duty pending an internal investigation.
Bystander video showed the plainclothes officer, who was not wearing a protective face mask, slapping 33-year-old Donni Wright in the face, punching him in the shoulder and dragging him to a sidewalk after leveling him in a crosswalk in Manhattan’s East Village.
“There will unquestionably be a careful look at what happened there,” Mayor Bill de Blasio said Sunday.
Police spokeswoman Sgt. Mary Frances O’Donnell said Wright “took a fighting stance against the officer” when he was ordered to disperse and was arrested on charges including assault on a police officer and resisting arrest. Wright had not been arraigned as of Sunday afternoon, prosecutors said.
A message seeking comment was left with the police officers’ union.
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Follow AP news coverage of the coronavirus pandemic at https://apnews.com/VirusOutbreak and https://apnews.com/UnderstandingtheOutbreak.


mercurynews--2020-05-05--FBI background checks remain high during pandemic

The FBI conducted nearly 3 million background checks associated with the sale , transfer or permitting of firearms in April , making it the fourth highest month for background checks since the bureau began keeping statistics in 1998 , according to new data released by the agency .
Figures from April were down from the record-shattering spike of 3.7 million FBI background checks in March 2020 , but still higher than checks done in the first two months of the year .
The states with the highest number of background checks conducted were Illinois , Kentucky , Texas , Florida @ @ @ @ @ @ @ federally licensed gun dealers must run checks on every buyer , whether a purchase is made in a store or at a gun show .
A buyer presents his or her identification to the seller , fills out a form from the US Bureau of Alcohol , Tobacco , Firearms , and Explosives ( ATF ) , which lists the buyer ’ s age , address , race , and any criminal history and then the seller submits the information to the FBI for checks against databases in order to ensure a criminal @ @ @ @ @ @ @ The surge in firearm background checks since the beginning of the year largely coincides with the deadly coronavirus pandemic , which has resulted in hundreds of thousands of deaths worldwide and various stay-at-home orders issued by federal , state and municipal governments .
It is not uncommon for high numbers of FBI firearm background checks to follow incidents of national tragedy .
In 2012 , federal law enforcement noted a 39 % spike in firearm transfer background checks during the month of the deadly shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ month .
The FBI similarly saw a 48 % surge in background checks in the month of the 2015 terrorist attack in San Bernardino , California , when compared to the previous month .
Following the record-setting figures in March , an official from the National Rifle Association — one of the nation ’ s largest gun-rights organizations — told CNN concerns about personal safety during the coronavirus pandemic are likely key drivers in the surge of FBI background checks .
“ Firearm sales go up in times of uncertainty because Americans know @ @ @ @ @ @ @ hands , ” said NRA spokesperson Amy Hunter in a statement to CNN .
She added , “ Headlines remind us about prisoners being furloughed , first responders being told to selectively enforce laws or being minutes away when seconds count .
Now , more than ever , it ’ s important that families have the ability and the tools they need to feel safe and able to defend themselves.
” Those in favor of gun control disagree .
“ It is understandable that many Americans are fearful and seeking security in the @ @ @ @ @ @ @ said Kris Brown , president of Brady , an organization that advocates for gun violence prevention .
“ However , we know that the rhetoric put forth by the NRA and the gun industry , that the purchase of a gun is a risk-free means to secure safety , is untrue and leads to tragic results every single day.
” Another group with the goal of working towards fewer guns in the United States says the new FBI data is especially stark when one focuses on comparative monthly figures associated with the actual @ @ @ @ @ @ @ licensees and government agencies .
“ We found the FBI ran 71 % more sales-related background checks in April 2020 , as compared to April 2019 , ” said Igor Volsky , executive director of Guns Down America , who noted government statistics reflect 1,596,519 background checks for gun sales were conducted last month , versus 931,494 the same time last year .
Volsky said firearm purchases tend to be seasonal in nature , making year-to-year comparisons most useful in determining whether gun sale surges are outside the norm .
His organization , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ and purchases , also says they are alarmed by President Donald Trump ’ s stoking of fear during the coronavirus outbreak .
“ This administration has repeatedly worked to expand access to guns during a national pandemic and has encouraged folks to take up arms and intimidate their governors into reopening the government , ” Volsky said .
• Coronavirus : No halt to the culture wars during pandemic Following a protest at the Michigan Capitol last week against government stay-at-home orders , Trump took to Twitter to side with the demonstrators , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ The Governor of Michigan should give a little , and put out the fire , ” Trump wrote .
“ These are very good people , but they are angry .
They want their lives back again , safely !
See them , talk to them , make a deal.
” Asked about the President ’ s backing of the protesters and images showing demonstrators squaring off with law enforcement , White House press secretary Kaleigh McEnany said Trump was generally supporting the First Amendment right to protest , and believes protesters must @ @ @ @

[vemba-video id=”politics/2020/05/04/trump-death-estimates-fox-news-sot-ctn-vpx.cnn”]
By Josh Campbell | CNN
The FBI conducted nearly 3 million background checks associated with the sale, transfer or permitting of firearms in April, making it the fourth highest month for background checks since the bureau began keeping statistics in 1998, according to new data released by the agency.
Figures from April were down from the record-shattering spike of 3.7 million FBI background checks in March 2020, but still higher than checks done in the first two months of the year.
The states with the highest number of background checks conducted were Illinois, Kentucky, Texas, Florida and California.
Under US law, federally licensed gun dealers must run checks on every buyer, whether a purchase is made in a store or at a gun show. A buyer presents his or her identification to the seller, fills out a form from the US Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, and Explosives (ATF), which lists the buyer’s age, address, race, and any criminal history and then the seller submits the information to the FBI for checks against databases in order to ensure a criminal record does not preclude the purchase.
The surge in firearm background checks since the beginning of the year largely coincides with the deadly coronavirus pandemic, which has resulted in hundreds of thousands of deaths worldwide and various stay-at-home orders issued by federal, state and municipal governments.
It is not uncommon for high numbers of FBI firearm background checks to follow incidents of national tragedy. In 2012, federal law enforcement noted a 39% spike in firearm transfer background checks during the month of the deadly shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut, as compared to the previous month. The FBI similarly saw a 48% surge in background checks in the month of the 2015 terrorist attack in San Bernardino, California, when compared to the previous month.
Following the record-setting figures in March, an official from the National Rifle Association — one of the nation’s largest gun-rights organizations — told CNN concerns about personal safety during the coronavirus pandemic are likely key drivers in the surge of FBI background checks.
“Firearm sales go up in times of uncertainty because Americans know their safety is ultimately in their own hands,” said NRA spokesperson Amy Hunter in a statement to CNN.
She added, “Headlines remind us about prisoners being furloughed, first responders being told to selectively enforce laws or being minutes away when seconds count. Now, more than ever, it’s important that families have the ability and the tools they need to feel safe and able to defend themselves.”
Those in favor of gun control disagree.
“It is understandable that many Americans are fearful and seeking security in the time of the Covid pandemic,” said Kris Brown, president of Brady, an organization that advocates for gun violence prevention. “However, we know that the rhetoric put forth by the NRA and the gun industry, that the purchase of a gun is a risk-free means to secure safety, is untrue and leads to tragic results every single day.”
Another group with the goal of working towards fewer guns in the United States says the new FBI data is especially stark when one focuses on comparative monthly figures associated with the actual new sale of guns through federal firearms licensees and government agencies.
“We found the FBI ran 71% more sales-related background checks in April 2020, as compared to April 2019,” said Igor Volsky, executive director of Guns Down America, who noted government statistics reflect 1,596,519 background checks for gun sales were conducted last month, versus 931,494 the same time last year.
Volsky said firearm purchases tend to be seasonal in nature, making year-to-year comparisons most useful in determining whether gun sale surges are outside the norm. His organization, which tracks trends in gun background checks and purchases, also says they are alarmed by President Donald Trump’s stoking of fear during the coronavirus outbreak.
“This administration has repeatedly worked to expand access to guns during a national pandemic and has encouraged folks to take up arms and intimidate their governors into reopening the government,” Volsky said.
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Two of the ‘Tennessee 3’ win their special elections National News | Monterey Park, 6 months after mass shooting, seeks gun dealer ‘buffer zone’ Following a protest at the Michigan Capitol last week against government stay-at-home orders, Trump took to Twitter to side with the demonstrators, some of whom were armed.
“The Governor of Michigan should give a little, and put out the fire,” Trump wrote. “These are very good people, but they are angry. They want their lives back again, safely! See them, talk to them, make a deal.”
Asked about the President’s backing of the protesters and images showing demonstrators squaring off with law enforcement, White House press secretary Kaleigh McEnany said Trump was generally supporting the First Amendment right to protest, and believes protesters must follow the law.